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Kinfolk
Romika Gunn
29 episodes
6 days ago
This is our space where I share everything I know about how to outlive and heal from childhood trauma. I truly believe it comes down to two concepts: learning how to love in a healthy way, and learning how to matter in a meaningful way. We'll walk through practical, and maybe sometimes even challenging ways to heal so that you can love and matter with more impact.
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Self-Improvement
Education
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All content for Kinfolk is the property of Romika Gunn and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
This is our space where I share everything I know about how to outlive and heal from childhood trauma. I truly believe it comes down to two concepts: learning how to love in a healthy way, and learning how to matter in a meaningful way. We'll walk through practical, and maybe sometimes even challenging ways to heal so that you can love and matter with more impact.
Show more...
Self-Improvement
Education
Episodes (20/29)
Kinfolk
29. No Need to Prove Yourself

There’s no need to prove yourself…to anyone. Ever. It doesn't make you more or less valuable.


Because you inherently have value, and once you learn how to respect that, you won’t let anyone else devalue what you know is worthy of respect, love, and consideration.

This episode is about just that. In this episode, Romika shares: 


  • How to explore our formative beliefs about our worth and inherent value
  • Why you need to stop trying to manage other peoples’ responses to you
  • Where beliefs come from
  • How to clarify your boundaries and communicate them to others and to yourself 
  • Communicating your clear boundaries just one time
  • and more!


If you have been enjoying the podcast, please leave a review and 5 stars!


You can also follow at: withinwarmwalls.com on Instagram and Tiktok.



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6 months ago
47 minutes 45 seconds

Kinfolk
28. Unhappy to Help Others

This is the 4th part of our Rebellion series, and it's all about why you may feel unhappy to help others.

If you’ve ever felt unhappy to help someone, it’s probably because you haven’t waited until these 3 things happen first before you offer your assistance.

If you feel like when you try to help others they transfer their failures onto you, or you are met with resistance, or they tend to ask for help for an indefinite amount of time - this episode is for you.

In this episode, Romika shares the three things she waits for before providing her help: 

  • ​How to wait for others to ask for help
  • ​How to wait until others can clarify the help they need
  • ​How to wait until others no longer have the expectation of perfection


Romika believes that if you choose to wait for these three things to happen before offering your assistance, you’ll find yourself way happier to help more people.

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7 months ago
39 minutes 21 seconds

Kinfolk
27. Existing With Fear

This is the 3rd part of our Rebellion Series!

This episode is all about fear. Romika shares that she does not believe it is possible to live without fear, but we can all learn how to coexist with it as an every day part of our lives without giving it the power to make our decisions.


Fear informs you, it doesn't have the power to decide your next step. You do.


In this episode, you will hear:

  • what fear is, and why it is important
  • why we have allowed fear to inform our decisions in the past and present
  • how to align your decisions to your values, not your fears
  • Learn a practice that will help you catastrophize the worst case scenario well
  • when to zoom out vs. zoom in
  • and more!


    If any episodes have been helpful, please leave a 5 star rating so that more people who need to hear these episodes can!


    Follow along on Instagram, Facebook and Tiktok @withinwarmwalls or withinwarmwalls.com.

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7 months ago
41 minutes 44 seconds

Kinfolk
26: Surviving Survivor's Guilt

This episode is heavy. This is part 2 of the Rebellion Series, and Romika goes into detail about her struggles with processing through her own survivor’s guilt in hopes to help you process through your own. 

This is an important conversation because if guilt is left unresolved and unprocessed in a healthy way, guilt is the fastest track to shame, and you are bound to repeat the cycles you were desperate to heal (or rebel) from when you choose to operate out of shame. 

This episode discusses:

    • How to understand survivor's guilt 
    • Why guilt is helpful and important to feel 
    • How to identify your own values and operate from them
    • How to label accurately

If you've been enjoying the podcast, please leave a 5 star rating, and drop a comment sharing why you like to listen to it, and how its helped you!

Follow for more on Instagram and Tiktok: @withinwarmwalls

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7 months ago
53 minutes 54 seconds

Kinfolk
25. Becoming a Tactical Negotiator

This is the very first part of our Rebellion Series! This is the first series ever shared on this podcast, and it’s going to be specific, tactical and practical.


The first part is all about learning how to be an effective negotiator. Romika shares the fundamental principles that she has learned after being trained as a corporate negotiator in her insurance role.


What you will realize quickly having gone through trauma is:

1, You are already skilled in this - Romika is just sharing the language and the framework to do it more effectively.

And 2, Everything in life is a negotiation. Whether you are negotiating your salary, terms of a relationship, navigating conflict, buying a car, or trying to get a toddler to eat their food - you negotiate all day.

This episode shares the principles of a negotiation, what being honest in a negotiation looks like, the difference between emotional empathy vs. tactical empathy, the power of walking away and being silent, how to say no, and more.


Follow along @withinwarmwalls or on the blog at: withinwarmwalls.com

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7 months ago
37 minutes 40 seconds

Kinfolk
24. Becoming Less Desperate

We’ve all felt desperate. And when you've lived through trauma, there's a reason why you can or have chosen to show up that way, so let's talk about it.


In this episode, we will discuss where desperation is rooted, how it shows up, and how we can take the next step to heal.

This episode discusses:

  • why we make decisions out of desperation
  • how to get present
  • what it looks like to show up from a place of security and confidence
  • Identifying the right context to pursue dreams
  • Learning how to complain less about the things we asked for


If you've been enjoying the podcast, please leave a 5 star rating, and drop a comment sharing why you like to listen to it, and how its helped you!

Follow for more on Instagram and Tiktok: @withinwarmwalls

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8 months ago
36 minutes 59 seconds

Kinfolk
23. The Balance Between Contentment and Complacency

It is so hard to know when you're living in contentment or choosing complacency. It's a fine line and a hard balance, and honestly, this episode might not give you the definite answer you're seeking. However, it will help you take the first step.

In this episode, Romika shares the backstory of why this is even a topic of discussion, and her approach to identifying how to know if she needs to seek out contentment, or make room for more.

This episode highlights:

  • How to manage what you already have
  • How to build out a mirror of support
  • Making room for a dream or growth


Please rate the podcast if you've been enjoying, and let Romika know in the comments, or send her a DM!

@withinwarmwalls on Instagram and Tiktok

withinwarmwalls.com

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8 months ago
32 minutes 14 seconds

Kinfolk
22. Living Happily Single

This episode is all about how to live and navigate through life happily single. It shouldn't come as a surprise to you at this point, that it is a deliberate and intentional pursuit to live your life this way.

Romika shares all of her best tips as someone who is doing the same, right alongside you.


In this episode, you will hear about:

  • Balancing finances
  • How to take care of yourself well
  • Initiating physical touch
  • Diversifying the backgrounds in your support group
  • Decentering your relationship status


It goes a long way to rate the podcast if you've been enjoying it!


Please rate the podcast by giving it a star rating if you've been enjoying it or found anything helpful - it goes such a long way to helping the podcast find those who also need and want to listen with us!

Follow along at:

Instagram - @withinwarmwalls

withinwarmwalls.com

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8 months ago
1 hour 2 minutes

Kinfolk
21. The Pursuit of Happiness

You'll want to listen to this episode if there's any question in your mind on whether or not happiness is possible for your life. Spoiler: the answer is the loudest, most obnoxious and enthusiastic, "yes!"

...and to be honest with you, it's probably a lot less difficult than you think it is to pursue true happiness. The catch is: the process is a little daunting.

But that's exactly what this episode is about. In this episode, Romika gives you some of the easiest practicals that you'll need to pursue happiness, no matter where you're currently at in life.

This episode dives into:

  • the difference between happiness and joy
  • how to get in alignment
  • how to simplify the pursuit of happiness
  • the difference between peace making and peace keeping
  • how to disrupt the monotony of life

and more!


Please rate the podcast by giving it a star rating if you've been enjoying it or found anything helpful - it goes such a long way to helping the podcast find those who also need and want to listen with us!


Follow along at:

Instagram - @withinwarmwalls

withinwarmwalls.com



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9 months ago
32 minutes 3 seconds

Kinfolk
20. Sustainable Self-Care

In this episode, Romika dives into the true meaning of self-care, breaking down the difference between simple pampering and the deeper, more transformative work of nurturing your mind, body, and soul. She explores her perspective on sustainable self-care.

This episode highlights:

Romika shares how she began this journey of self-care

  • Pampering vs. True Self-Care: on why self-care isn’t just about indulging in temporary pleasures, and what true, sustainable self-care involves.
  • Episode 7: How to Become Yourself was referenced in this episode
  • Learning how to do what you need to do now
  • Investing in a life that will outlive you
  • and, sharing how to give up your old self

If you've been enjoying this podcast, please take a second to rate and review the podcast! Your feedback helps more people find the show and join in on the conversation. Plus, it helps Romika to continue to creating content you love.

Follow Romika on Instagram @wtihinwarmwalls or visit withinwarmwalls.com for more content!

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9 months ago
46 minutes 49 seconds

Kinfolk
19. Before You Quit, Consider This

In this episode, Romika believes she can convince you not to quit on your goals in under an hour...

This episode is 58 minutes and 12 seconds and it is packed full of so many practical steps to help you understand how to make your goals more manageable, the reasons you couldn't be successful in the past, and what needs to change or be altered in order for you to do what you always sought out to do.


This episode includes practicals and insights on:

  • How to know when to move on from a goal or dream
  • Understanding the difference between personality types and how you're wired
  • The difference between movement vs. action
  • How to quiet noise
  • How to get advice
  • Leveraging resources
  • Obsession
  • a scarcity mindset
  • Eliminating distractions
  • Changing your environment
  • The difference between comfort vs. character
  • Making your goals more achievable
  • When and how to form a plan


Please rate and leave a review the podcast, as this helps so much to get this podcast out there to more Kinfolk!


Instagram - @kinfolk.podcast and @withinwarmwalls




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9 months ago
58 minutes 12 seconds

Kinfolk
18. Responsibility Displacement: When Helping Hurts

In this episode, Romika shares why it is so hard to allow others to be responsible. She challenges you to give responsibly for others' loads back to them, and shares why it is so important to only carry burdens.


In this episode, you will hear:

  • The definition of responsibility displacement
  • The difference between a "load" and a "burden
  • When helping hurts - what you need to do
  • The "Let them" Theory
  • Appropriately responding to others


Please rate and leave a review of the podcast on Apple and Spotify to help grow our community!

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9 months ago
37 minutes 20 seconds

Kinfolk
17. Refusing to be a People-Pleaser

The reason most of have chosen to show up as a people-pleasers is because most of us don't see it as a problem, or haven't considered that we made this decision as a response to our trauma.

In this episode, Romika shares exactly why people-pleasing is a problem, and how to reflect on the time in your life when you decided to show up this way, and practicals to show up differently.

This episode includes:

  • A reference to the book "Atomic Habits" by James Clear
  • highlights previous episodes, "The Four Principles to Establishing Healthy Boundaries (Episode 2) and "How to stay out of Trauma (Episode 14).
  • Several mindset shifts to help process why you people-please and how to overcome it


Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠

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10 months ago
42 minutes 38 seconds

Kinfolk
16. Becoming Less Awkward

We're all awkward. It just that some of us just may be a little more awkward than others...and that's okay!

This episode is for my awkward people who are ready to become more tactful in building new relationships, or going deeper with relationships that may be at a shallow standstill.

In this episode, Romika discusses:

  • How to embrace discomfort
  • How to have more interesting conversations
  • and drafting a signature question

She references the book, "Year of Yes" by Shonda Rhimes. Linked here for you.

Follow for more on instagram @kinfolk

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1 year ago
22 minutes 28 seconds

Kinfolk
15. Living an Unbothered Life

Sometimes it can feel like no matter how hard you try, things just always seem to bother you. If that sounds like you - this episode is the perfect place to start.

In this episode, Romika shares 3 key areas that might be preventing you from living your best, unbothered life.

This episode includes practicals on how to:

  • Identify weak points in your accessibility
  • work towards acceptance instead of resentment/indifference
  • Narrow down a more unbothered network

Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠

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1 year ago
27 minutes 7 seconds

Kinfolk
14. How to stay out of Trauma

The way you stay free requires a completely different approach than the strategy you used to get free.

In this episode, Romika shares a lot about Game Theory - the science of strategy - so that you can learn how to strategize ways to win at life, instead of just settling to play the game not to lose.

This episode includes:

  • Examples of what it looks like to play not to lose
  • 12 thought pattern examples from a worksheet sent to Romika by her therapist from one of their sessions
  • 4 practicals on how to enforce a strategy that helps you play to win

Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠

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1 year ago
37 minutes 30 seconds

Kinfolk
13. Maintaining Old Friendships

It may seem as though there is a completely different approach needed when it comes to maintaining old friendships (as compared to new friendships), but the truth is: many of the fundamentals are the same!

In this episode, Romika shares easy to apply practicals to help strengthen, deepen and maintain the bonds in your older friendships.

  • Define the Relationship (DTR)
  • Make new memories
  • Focus/Prioritize the connection, not the issue
  • Don't assume (good or bad) - ask


Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠


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1 year ago
31 minutes 59 seconds

Kinfolk
12. The Paralysis of Perfectionism (and how to heal)

Perfectionism is the silent filter that curates your perspective on life - and many times, it's filtering your life, unbeknownst to you.

In this episode, Romika wants to help you self-identify the different types of perfectionism. Most perfectionists fall in and out of these 3 categories: the self-oriented perfectionist, the other-oriented perfectionist, and the socially-oriented perfectionist.

In short, there are 3 key principles:

  1. Learning that everything you do, doesn't need to be the best you've ever done
  2. Does it have to be perfect, or is it okay that it's done?
  3. Inventory and Delegate

Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠

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1 year ago
42 minutes 1 second

Kinfolk
11. Scarcity Mindset Recovery

It's hard to talk about life without also addressing your limiting beliefs...we all have them, the hope is that we'll all become more aware of the ones that are influencing our decisions in a negative way.

If unchecked, limiting beliefs take on a scarcity mindset. In this episode, Romika takes a deep dive into some of the groundwork that will hopefully help you begin to heal your scarcity mindset by targeting your limiting beliefs first.

In short, it comes down to 3 main areas:

  1. Your narrative
  2. Your influenced decisions, and lastly,
  3. Stretching your capacity to give more

Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that those that need to hear can come heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠

Show more...
1 year ago
37 minutes 38 seconds

Kinfolk
10. The Courage to be Disliked

The courage to be disliked is all about risking rejection. If you are anything like Romika, everything in you will tempt you to skip over this episode, but please stick it out.

It'll be worth it if you're a recovering people pleaser who wants to show up more genuinely in life and relationships.

  • 07:07 - Introducing "constraints"
  • 20:28 - You're a people pleaser
  • 26:34 - You don't always need to relate to others
  • 32:55 - Let them

The book referenced is called, The Courage to be Disliked by  ⁠Ichiro Kishimi⁠ and ⁠Fumitake Koga⁠ 


Please do leave a review, comment, like and share this podcast so that more people can listen and heal too! You can also follow along on social media, including: Instagram and Facebook!

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@kinfolk_podcast⁠⁠⁠


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1 year ago
36 minutes 16 seconds

Kinfolk
This is our space where I share everything I know about how to outlive and heal from childhood trauma. I truly believe it comes down to two concepts: learning how to love in a healthy way, and learning how to matter in a meaningful way. We'll walk through practical, and maybe sometimes even challenging ways to heal so that you can love and matter with more impact.