In this powerful and reflective episode of The Sober & Strong Podcast, host Mel Stephens helps you look deeper into the real reasons behind why you drink, or why you still crave alcohol, even after taking a break.
Mel guides you through a self-reflective exercise to uncover the emotions behind drinking, whether it’s stress, boredom, connection, or the simple habit of pouring a glass out of routine. You’ll learn how to identify what you’re actually craving, and how to replace alcohol with healthier, more fulfilling choices that truly meet your needs.
By the end of this episode, you’ll start to see that alcohol was never really the solution; it was just the habit standing between you and the person you’ve always dreamed of being.
If you’re questioning your relationship with alcohol or ready to make a change, this episode will help you take that first powerful step.
00:36 Reflecting on Your Relationship with Alcohol
01:13 Understanding the Feelings Behind Alcohol Cravings
02:20 Creating a Plan to Manage Cravings
03:44 Rewiring Your Brain for New Habits
04:15 Final Thoughts and Takeaways
In this episode of The Sober & Strong Podcast, host Mel Stephens shares the powerful mindset shift that can change the way you think about taking a break from alcohol.
Instead of focusing on what you’re “giving up,” Mel helps you reframe your thoughts to focus on everything you’re getting back — your energy, confidence, metabolism, sleep and peace of mind. Drawing on positive psychology and neuroscience, she explains how reframing your thoughts helps rewire your brain and break old drinking habits for good.
You’ll learn four practical tools you can start using today, from creating a “getting” list to catching the craving loop, and begin to imagine what your life could look like when you stop seeing alcohol as something you’re losing, and start seeing the freedom, health and joy you’re gaining.
If you’re a woman in midlife who’s sober curious or ready for a change, this episode will leave you feeling empowered and ready to take the next step.
00:11 The Power of a Mindset Shift
00:57 Reframing Your Thoughts
02:16 The Importance of Rewiring Your Brain
04:08 Practical Tips for a Mindset Shift
06:31 Understanding and Managing Cravings
07:51 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Ever wondered why the workouts and nutrition strategies that worked in your 30s just aren’t cutting it in your 40s? You’re not alone.
In this episode, host Mel Stephens breaks down how alcohol affects women in perimenopause and menopause, and why it has such a big impact on metabolism, fat loss and muscle building at this stage of life. Drawing from Dr. Stacy Sims’ research, we’ll look at how even “moderate” drinking can stall your results — and why the effects last longer than you think.
Plus, she introduces a brand new segment: This Week in Midlife — where I share the funny, frustrating and totally relatable moments that come with being a woman in midlife (this week: brain fog and missed appointments 🙃).
If you’re working hard but not seeing results, this episode will help you connect the dots and remind you: change doesn’t have to be forever; even small shifts can make a big difference.
00:53 The Impact of Alcohol on Metabolism
01:52 Understanding Alcohol's Effect on Muscle and Sleep
03:58 Personal Reflections and Realizations
04:19 Introducing “This Week in Midlife”
04:44 A Midlife Memory Mishap
06:19 Final Thoughts and Resources
If you’ve been running on empty, putting everyone else first, or struggling to justify time and money for yourself, this is your reminder that self-care isn’t selfish, it’s essential.
Host Mel Stephens shares her enlightening experience at the Scandinavian Spa in Blue Mountain, Ontario, which led her to three valuable realizations about self-care. She emphasizes the importance of self-care for better sleep, the necessity of treating oneself monthly and the potential for shared self-care activities.
Through the thermal journey experience at the spa, she discovered the profound impact of relaxing her body and mind, and she encourages everyone to incorporate similar routines into their lives for improved well-being.
00:00 Introduction to Self-Care Insights
00:07 Vacation Reflections and Realizations
00:41 The Blue Mountain Experience
01:08 The Scandinavian Spa Journey
03:27 Implementing Self-Care at Home
04:38 Monthly Self-Care Commitment
06:17 Self-Care with Loved Ones
06:52 Conclusion and Takeaways
If you're in your forties or fifties and finding it tough to get the rest you need, you're not alone.
In this episode, host Mel Stephens shares her personal struggle with falling asleep and discusses why sleep gets harder as we move into midlife. She briefly explains the science behind our sleep struggles and gives you four actionable tips you can start using tonight to unwind, calm your mind and improve your sleep. From creating a bedtime routine to adjusting your caffeine intake, these strategies can help you get better rest.
00:00 Introduction: Struggling with Sleep
00:48 Understanding Midlife Sleep Challenges
02:12 Tip 1: Creating Space Between Your Day and Sleep
04:22 Tip 2: Cooling Yourself Down
05:06 Tip 3: Reducing Caffeine Intake
06:04 Tip 4: Practicing Breath Work
07:05 Conclusion: Building Better Sleep Habits
Summer is here — and so are the drinks.
From patios to cottage weekends, warm weather can trigger old habits. In this episode, Mel shares two personal moments from her own sober summer that brought back thoughts of old drinking habits.
You’ll learn the neuroscience behind habit loops, how to break your brain’s association between summer and alcohol and four powerful strategies to help you enjoy summer without the booze.
If this is your first (or fifth) sober summer, think of this episode as a shot of inspiration and motivation to keep going.
00:27 Facing Triggers in a Sober Lifestyle
02:03 Celebrating Without Alcohol
02:42 Breaking Summer Drinking Habits
03:58 Understanding Associative Conditioning
05:15 Four Strategies for a Sober Summer
08:21 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
Are you carrying the invisible mental checklist for your entire household? The dentist appointments, birthday parties, meal plans, groceries, and don’t forget the toilet paper. 😅
In this episode, host Mel Stephens opens up about the mental load women often carry. And when hormones shift and stress tolerance drops, the weight of doing it all can feel even heavier.
Tune in to hear how mental load impacts your wellbeing and walk away with five practical ways to lighten it. From outsourcing tasks to teaching your kids responsibility and learning to communicate your needs, this episode is your permission slip to put yourself back on the list.
00:20 Understanding the Mental Load
01:45 Impact of Mental Load on Wellbeing
02:58 Changing Your Mindset
04:18 Five Strategies to Reduce Mental Load
04:29 Delegation and Outsourcing
06:28 Teaching Responsibility
07:31 Getting Organized
09:02 Prioritizing Self-Care
09:47 Importance of Communication
11:12 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Have you been tracking how many drinks you’ve had, counting alcohol-free days, or feeling like you’ve failed when you slip up? You are not alone.
In this episode, host Mel Stephens shares the mindset shift that can help change everything: instead of focusing on how much you drink, start asking why you drink.
This powerful reframe can help you finally understand your habits, get to the root of why you reach for that glass at night and reconnect with your deeper reasons for wanting to take a break from alcohol.
You’ll walk away with journal prompts and questions to reflect on your own personal experience, as well as a new sense of clarity about what’s really holding you back.
0:00 Introduction and Purpose
00:46 The Problem with Focusing on Quantity
01:55 Shifting the Mindset: From How Much to Why
02:11 Identifying Your Reasons for Drinking
04:37 Reflecting on Personal Experiences
06:02 Taking Action and Staying Motivated
If you’re a woman in your 40s or 50s who’s sober-curious or trying to drink less, this episode is for you. Host Mel Stephens explores why mindful drinking is more than just a trend; it’s a powerful form of self-care, especially in perimenopause and menopause.
You’ll learn:
You’ll discover practical tips for drinking mindfully, such as pausing before you pour, creating new rituals, setting limits and reflecting on your experiences. Plus, we'll delve into the 'Five Whys' technique, a powerful tool for understanding your relationship with alcohol.
This episode is all about self-awareness, self-care and taking control of your well-being. Let's reconnect with what we need and make choices that align with what makes us truly happy.
00:00 Introduction to Mindful Drinking
00:39 Understanding Mindful Drinking
01:26 Personal Journey with Alcohol
04:01 Practical Tips for Mindful Drinking
08:56 The Five Whys Technique
11:05 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
Still trying to work out 5 or 6 days a week and not seeing results? You’re not alone. In this episode, Mel breaks down how more workouts aren’t always better, especially in perimenopause and menopause.
Learn how overtraining can backfire by changing the diversity of bacteria in your gut, increasing inflammation, impacting your sleep health and stalling your results, and how to create a sustainable fitness routine that works with your body, not against it.
This episode gives you a flexible workout template that combines strength training, sprint intervals, and active recovery, plus the most important advice of all: listen to your body and train for life, not for a short-term transformation.
00:00 Introduction to Exercise in Perimenopause and Menopause
00:48 The Pitfalls of Over-Exercising
01:30 The Problem with Transformation Programs
03:21 Building a Sustainable Exercise Routine
03:52 Key Features of an Effective Workout Plan
07:02 Sample Weekly Workout Routine
08:52 The Importance of Consistency
10:20 Final Thoughts and Takeaways
Still skipping breakfast before your workout or grabbing just a coffee on the way to the gym? If you’re a woman in perimenopause and you’re training fasted, or not fueling properly after, you could be stalling your fat loss and strength progress without even knowing it.
In this episode, host Mel Stephens breaks down exactly how to fuel before and after your workouts to support muscle growth, reduce cortisol and finally start seeing changes in your body. Based on Dr. Stacy Sims’ research, you’ll learn how fueling smarter helps you avoid Low Energy Availability (LEA), stabilize your metabolism and hit your calorie target without stressing over it.
Whether you’re trying to lose weight, build strength or simply feel better in your 40s, this episode will give you the how behind the science, plus practical tips and meal ideas to start fueling like your best self.
If you’re eating healthy, lifting weights and still not seeing results, this episode is for you!
Host Mel Stephens explains why eating too little is one of the most common fat-loss mistakes women make in perimenopause and menopause.
You’ll learn how to calculate your personal calorie needs using fat-free mass, what Low Energy Availability (LEA) is and why it stalls weight loss, and what Dr. Stacy Sims’ research says about optimal energy intake for midlife women.
If you’ve been consuming less than 1,500 calories and wondering why your strength and fat loss goals feel impossible, this episode will give you the clarity (and numbers) you need to start fueling your body for what it needs.
Mel Stephens is Menopause 2.0 Certified through Dr. Stacy Sims, a leading researcher and expert in women’s physiology.
00:28 The Problem with Cutting Calories
01:38 Understanding Energy Availability
03:10 Calculating Your Energy Needs
06:43 Signs of Low Energy Availability
09:20 Conclusion and Next Steps
Important Numbers to Remember:
LEA threshold for women: 13.6 calories per lb or 30 calories per kg of fat-free mass.
Women should aim for 18 to 20.5 calories per lb or 40 to 45 calories per kg of fat-free mass
Energy (Calorie) Intake Calculation Example:
Total weight: 150 lbs
Body fat percentage: 25%
Step 1: Convert body fat percentage of 25% to a decimal (divide it by 100) = 0.25
Step 2: Calculate fat mass: (body weight) 150 lbs x 0.25 = 37.5 lbs
Step 3: Calculate fat-free mass: 150 lbs - 37.5 lbs = 112.5 lbs
Step 4: Calculate calorie intake: 112.5 lbs x 18 = 2025 calories
If you’re over 40, in perimenopause or menopause, and wondering why your “healthy eating” isn’t getting results, this episode is for you!
Host Mel Stephens breaks down the three biggest nutrition opportunities that women over 40 should consider if they want to change their body composition, based on research from Dr. Stacy Sims.
We’ll talk about protein, fueling your workouts and the importance of consuming enough calories to fuel your body.
Together, let’s learn how to eat for your strongest, healthiest self in perimenopause and beyond.
00:00 Introduction To Nutrition And A Healthy Lifestyle
00:36 Personal Nutrition Journey And Struggles
02:17 Understanding Nutrition In Perimenopause
02:47 Opportunity 1: Importance Of Protein Intake
05:53 Opportunity 2: Fueling Before And After Exercise
09:07 Opportunity 3: Consuming Enough Calories
11:20 Conclusion And Next Steps
Ready to start your Sober & Strong journey?
In this very personal and empowering episode, host Mel Stephens reflects on her first full year alcohol-free, sharing her seven biggest takeaways from her journey, including how mocktails helped in the early days, how to manage cravings and how letting go of perfection made the journey feel easier.
This episode is for anyone who is feeling like alcohol just isn’t helping anymore, or who is taking a break or considering taking a break from alcohol.
Whether you're sober-curious or already on a sober journey, Mel hopes that her honest reflections and gentle encouragement will remind you that you don’t have to commit to forever, just to starting.
00:00 Introduction and Milestone Celebration
00:53 Reflecting On The Journey
01:17 Takeaway 1: Don’t Put A Timeframe On It
01:54 Takeaway 2: Trusting My Gut
04:02 Takeaway 3: The Role of Mocktails
05:16 Takeaway 4: Saying Yes
06:48 Takeaway 5: Building A Supportive Community
07:58 Takeaway 6: Managing Cravings
09:35 Takeaway 7: Embracing The Benefits
11:44 Conclusion & Encouragement
Ready to start your Sober & Strong journey?
Still working out the way you did in your 30s and wondering why it’s not working anymore? You are not alone.
In episode 17, we dive into what happens to women’s bodies during perimenopause and why your approach to exercise needs to change.
Drawing from Dr. Stacy Sims' research, we’ll explore how to train smarter, not harder, to support your hormones, build muscle and feel your best in this new stage of life.
00:00 Introduction: Struggling with Fitness After 40
00:17 Personal Journey: Mel's Fitness Struggles
00:45 Understanding Perimenopause and Fitness
02:08 Why Your Old Workout Routine Isn't Working
03:36 The Importance of Strength Training
04:50 The Role of HIIT Workouts
06:02 Fueling Your Workouts
07:16 The Importance of Recovery
08:04 Conclusion: Embrace the Change
Don't forget to check out Episode 19 for more on nutritional needs during perimenopause.
Are you sober curious? Thinking about taking a break from alcohol but not sure where to start?
In this episode, host Mel Stephens walks you through a few key steps to prepare you for success. Whether you’re struggling with weight gain, poor sleep or just feeling off, this episode will give you the tools to make your alcohol-free journey feel empowering, not overwhelming.
All you need is the right mindset and a plan!
00:34 Mel's Personal Journey with Alcohol
02:25 The Importance of Your Mindset and Having a Plan
05:06 Setting Up Your Environment for Success
07:01 Managing Expectations and Handling Challenges
12:30 Wrap-up and Encouragement
Grab my 4-Week Sober & Strong Roadmap and start your alcohol-free journey today!
In this episode, host Mel Stephens dives into how alcohol affects muscle growth, metabolism and overall body composition, especially for women over 40.
She breaks down the science behind muscle protein synthesis and discusses the detrimental effects of alcohol on this process.
Learn how alcohol disrupts your hormones, impairs sleep and recovery and negatively impacts your metabolism, making it harder to see results from your workouts.
This episode also includes specific tips for women in perimenopause and menopause to help build muscle and improve body composition.
Tune in as we explore why taking a break from alcohol might be the key to achieving your fitness goals.
01:30 How Alcohol Affects Muscle Protein Synthesis
02:55 Alcohol And Hormones
03:46 Alcohol, Sleep and Recovery
04:19 Alcohol and Metabolism
05:39 Why It’s Hard to Build Muscle In Perimenopause And Menopause
08:42 Actionable Steps to Build Muscle
Host Mel Stephens is a certified well-being coach and certified personal trainer.
Ready to start your Sober & Strong journey?
Curious about non-alcoholic wine but not sure where to start? In this episode, I'll break down six different types of non-alcoholic wines, including de-alcoholized, grape juice-based, tea-based, sparkling, fruit-based, and aged wines.
I'll share my personal recommendations for each type, the key things to look for when choosing a non-alcoholic wine, and some insider tips based on my own experiences.
If you're looking for the best non-alcoholic wine or just starting your alcohol-free journey, this episode is for you!
00:00 Introduction to Non-Alcoholic Wine
01:02 Dealcoholized Wine
02:41 Grape Juice-Based Wine
03:34 Tea-Based Wine
06:08 Sparkling Non-Alcoholic Wine
08:21 Fruit-Based Wine
09:10 Oxidized or Aged Non-Alcoholic Wine
11:46 Tips for Choosing Non-Alcoholic Wine
Ready to start your Sober & Strong journey?
Download my free 4-Week Sober & Strong Roadmap
If you’ve ever thought, “I don’t want to quit drinking entirely, but I need to find balance,” you’re not alone.
Many people struggle with moderation—some make it work, while others find it harder than quitting altogether.
In this episode, we’re diving into:
If you’ve been thinking about redefining your relationship with alcohol, this episode might help you decide what’s best for you.
00:53 The Science Behind Moderation
03:00 Personal Experiences with Moderation
04:24 Is Moderation Realistic for You?
07:03 Tips for Successful Moderation
08:21 Recap and Final Thoughts
Ready to start your Sober & Strong journey?
If you have committed to going alcohol-free or you’ve been thinking about it, maybe you’ve dipped your toe in and tried to cut back, wherever you’re at on your sober journey, I’m here today with a little pep talk just for you.
If you’re feeling stuck, exhausted, or like life is throwing too much at you, this episode is your reminder that you are stronger than you think.
I'll talk about how to push through the hard moments, stay committed to yourself and keep moving forward — one step at a time.
💛 Listen now and DM me on Instagram (@iammelstephens) with one thing you’re proud of today!