This episode will help you step into your higher self and abundance. Filmed in January 2025, I go over all my previous New Year’s resolutions that got me to where I am today, my New Year’s resolution for 2025, and we make sense of Narc ex's, and discuss my ex's ex-gfs...

Hopeful, validating and motivating episode. In this episode, I chat about:

• The emotional impact of growing up with divorced parents during the holidays
• What past relationships have taught me—especially the messy, controlling and abusive ones
• How I’m learning to forgive myself and follow what’s right for me
• A deep dive into quantum physics, parallel universes, and energy theories
• And this idea: if slowing down light lets us see the colours inside it... maybe slowing down time lets us see what’s really going on inside us too

It’s reflective, a bit all over the place, sometimes emotional, sometimes scientific,but always honest. If you’re navigating big feelings, or you just need company while thinking about life, come along.Drop a comment if anything resonates, be sure to Follow and Subscribeand if you’ve got book recs or quantum theories, PLEASE comment them!To all of you fumblers, thank you for being here. To the 31 new listeners, welcome! There are 159 (+3) of you on Spotify558 (+22) on YouTube6 (+6) of you on Apple Podsand a lot of you on socials!You are all, amazing.If you haven’t already, please Follow or Subscribeto help me reach more people and provide better content,let’s keep growing together.As always, I’ll see you in the episode!I’ll trust you to keep yourself safe, and OK.Keep Fumbling Forward,My warmest wishes,Frankie x00:00 Introduction01:48 Christmas is difficult (humour helps)03:55 Guilt05:30 Feeling low at certain times of the year05:55 The importance of self-forgiveness07:15 Coercive control08:46 How I frame my abusive relationships09:39 Reflections from my 'catalyst' ex10:40 The key - next part of my journey12:01 The 'bad guy'13:30 The power in surrounding yourself with supportive people14:38 NY resolutions17:10 People cancelling19:24 Random theories25:15 Gratitudes/Abundance/Manifestation28:36 Being a 'know it all'30:43 I dont feel I fit anywhere36:00 Boundaries & meeting my needs40:21 'Even though' - what if it works?!45:27 Know it all x246:43 ENERGY47:13 Being co-dependant48:39 Outro / takeaways

Hello hello, we're starting to see a shift! (Filmed Dec 24) I'm sure you can see it too form the first ep! Yup that’s right - another death! Grief seems to be all around at the moment, uncles, friends and colleagues, but weirdly I seem to be managing it ok.

A good friend died, she will be very dearly missed - what an incredible woman she was. To her, kindness and glamour. Come listen to how wonderful she was, and what I’ve been thinking that’s been getting me through the overload of grief I’ve had recently.

There is still a lot of laughter and joy in this episode, which really goes to show more than one emotion can exist at the same time. Grief and loss is not all there is, and it’s important to remind yourself of this when you’re surrounded by it.

I’ve also decided I'm starting to not take life as seriously anymore, and consequently, I’m starting to be funny again!

Here’s some things I’ve learned in this episode:

• It doesn’t matter how much time has passed, you can still reach out to people.

• How you think other people perceive you, is NOT accurate!

• Being authentic is a NEED!

• You can be authentic and then put it to the side too to still enjoy life. It’s not all there is.

• You DO have all the answers - you don't need to be rescued, if you're reliant on others, you'll always need them, is that why we do it?

We also discuss the skill of repeating back what people say, and how it unlocks their minds.

There is an update on the noisy neighbours...

I've experimented with not caring about what others think, AND I go through my journal with you to share the lessons I learned in each day.

This part always blows my mind,

the part where we see how many of you are here:

To all 1,225 of you here on the journey with me, thank you.

A huge warm welcome to the new 568 fumblers!

There are 156 (+3) of you on Spotify 🥹

And 536 (+31) on YouTube

and a lot of you on socials!

You are all, amazing.

If you haven’t already done so,

please ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’.

And as always, I’ll see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself safe, and OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

My warmest wishes,

Frankie

x

I started the day like “URGH, another day..”

and I’m now bouncing off the walls.

And you will be too.

I am so excited for you to watch this episode,

the energy is infectious!

If you fancy a laugh and want to learn about psychology,

then give it a watch.

With each episode, the free-er,

more fun and excitable me, comes to life.

Her names Tigger.

In this episode you'll learn about:

The Window of Tolerance

Hyper and Hypo-arousal

Time Structuring

and how my podcast is literally healing my ADHD

(& suspected Autism...

which I’m starting to believe is also rooted in developmental trauma).

I have also stumbled upon.. a new hobby!

So come have a laugh, stroke a dog, and heal your life with me.

Please give the episode a rating,

follow if you enjoy it or found it helpful,

and comment your hobbies so we have a tonne of new things to try!

This part always blows my mind,

the part where we see how many of you are here:

To all 657 of you here on the journey with me, thank you.

A huge warm welcome to the new 9 fumblers!

There are 153 (+2) of you on Spotify 🥹

And 505 (+9)on YouTube.

You are all, amazing.

If you haven’t already done so,

please ‘Follow’ so we can keep this community growing

and help each other THRIVE.

If you haven't downloaded your FREE Journal Prompt Guide EBOOK, head to my insta, and it's linked on my profile. It's designed to bring you out of fight/flight, regulate your nervous system and rewire your limiting beliefs, and yes - it's backed with neuroscience and psychology and there's some psychology education in there too.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself safe, and OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

My warmest wishes,

Frankie

x

Some takeaways and questions to ask yourself from todays episode:

1. You are special, treat yourself as such.
2. You are allowed to advocate for yourself.
3. You are your first priority, and the fact you consider others, speaks to how kind you are. Even when they've negatively impacted you.
4. People will try to scare you to 'shut you up', stay factual, rational and adult, seek appropriate advice.
5. You might be arguing because you're overwhelmed, not because you hate each other.
6. If you're struggling / sensitive, check your foundations, (sleep, food, socialising, quiet).
7. Grief effects us in funny ways - and emotions pop up randomly, let it come.
8. People will die unexpectedly. It is sad, but you will be ok. You must look after yourself.
9. When you don't know what to do, ask ChatGPT.
10. You aren't the problem, you're just overwhelmed.
11. Could you be contributing?
12. A diagnosis is just a group of symptoms. It's not a label. You are so much more than a label, and your symptoms.
13. Your symptoms could be stemming from beliefs.
14. You can do hard things.
15. When you are consistently exposed to something, you lose the ability to take action. You must act.
16. Just because you have ADHD, does not mean there's anything wrong with you. You are exactly how you are supposed to be, given your environment.
17. People will project their past on to you, and you will do it to others, the trick is to be aware of it, be curious, and stay present.
18. It's ok not to have difficult conversations when you're burnt out. Not everything has to happennow. It can wait, and it might never need to be said; only you will know.
19. Just because someone does something similar to something your ex or someone else did, does not mean they are the same.
20. What helps you get through? Do that.
21. What did you do in your past that you loved? Do that again.
22. What smells do you love? Can you get them in your life.
23. It might be worth considering,maybe you're not the problem.
24. Are you avoiding something?
25. What are your dreams for the future?

If you have any questions for me, leave them in the comments, or feel free to pop me an anonymous question, the link is on my instagram (FrankieGClark).

We're now at495 on YouTube, and151 on Spotify! It's bizarre to me that over600 of you listen to my rambles, and that's not including the social media pages where I share the little snippets / pockets of wisdom from the eps.

If you're not already following, subscribed or haven't rated the podcast, please do, and if you don't follow my socials here they are for you:

@fumblingforwardpodcast (TikTok)

@Frankiegclark (TikTok)

@fumblingforward (instagram)

@frankieGClark (instagram for coaching)

@frankie_theglowupcoach (TikTok)

I hope my learnings help you build your own wisdom, or navigate whatever you're going through. Thank you for being here, and thank you for listening.

My very best wishes,

Frankie x

I usually put these updates at the bottom of these emails,

but I am so happy and grateful, I had to share this first.

There are now 625 of you here on the journey with me.

A huge warm welcome to the new 38 fumblers!

It’s crazy to see these numbers!

There are 151 of you on Spotify 🥹

And 474 (+38) on YouTube.

It doesn’t feel real. Thank you so much.

For helping me to live my dream life.

I am sending you so much light and love.

If you haven’t already done so,

please ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’

so we can keep this community growing.

If you struggle advocating for yourself

or navigating situations with men

that make you feel uncomfortable/unsafe,

then this episode might help you gain some understanding

on why you might feel that way and how to navigate it.

If you find when your partner annoys you,

a blame game gets played, and they becomes defensive,

then this will also help you with that.

Episode also includes:

Stress, responsibility, how to navigate mistakes, assumptions, EMDR, traumatic memories, loyalty, cutting people out, love languages, boundaries, intimacy, people not making effort, letting people down, and conflict.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself safe, and OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

My warmest wishes,

Frankie

x

What is trauma?

Is it PTSD, ADHD or Autism?

What are the symptoms?

What is EMDR?

How does it work?

Well you’re in for a treat.

Join me before and after an EMDR session,

(Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing)

In this episode I'll be going through all those questions.

What's lovely to see as I've been editing this ,

is the parts of myself

which seem to have been hidden for so long,

finally making their way back to the surface,

my humour and my animated self.

Seeing my free child ego state

emerge to the surface

shows me that we're starting to get somewhere

and see some progress.

I call out some of my Stimming,

things I hid from the world

or hoped people wouldn't see.

I'm deconstructing and highlighting

each bit of myself, bit-by-bit (bits like a computer? Willow?)

to lay all out on the table so you can see it,

identify it and work with it,

just like an engineer.

When we can see all the different pieces,

we can then see how it all fits together,

how it has, and does make you who you are.

It sounds like the after effect of trauma,

it's been defined as a fragmented sense of self,

where parts of yourself breaks away

and you’re no longer cohesive

and when you heal trauma

you pull back all the fragmented parts,

to make yourself whole again.

That kinda feels like what I’m doing.

Which is why this podcast feels so healing for me.

It allows all the parts of myself,

brings them back together

and makes it all ok, one.

Am I just then healing complex trauma?

Interesting.

I think the most valuable part of this podcast

are some of the words my therapist used,

and a phrase from my first year tutor.

My Therapist asked me to put on a graph for EMDR

some memories and the impact level

or how the memories are still affecting me.

I couldn't put down the scores,

I couldn’t ‘get it right’.

She invited me to be compassionate from my body,

she told me that my body didn't have a voice,

and my body only has me to speak for it,

and could I give her the number that my body gave me.

That blew my mind.

That enabled me to access the numbers.

So if you've been struggling

with getting things right for your body,

it only has you to speak for it.

Ask it, and let it, tell you.

And my first year Tutor’s phrase is;

“I know what *xyz* feels like for me,

but so I know what it feels like for you,

can you describe it to me?”

This is really profound because

it highlights that we all experience

the same emotion, but differently.

I've said this from a very young age,

the colour blue we might all call ‘blue’,

but we might see different shades of it.

This is why I think human language is limited,

(getting a bit woo-woo here)

and why the AI machines created a new language,

we are unable to truly understand each other

because we're not like Vision from Marvel or

Avatars where you can show people memories,

of feel their emotions.

Maybe we will get there one day.

But for now, it's important to remember

you can never truly know how someone feels,

because you have not lived their life,

or felt their experiences.

I’ve had a really great feeling about this podcast

I’ve been so excited and terrified at the same time;

opening myself up to so many of you to question, critique, judge,

But I’m excited about how it will help so many of you,

how it will grow,

and where it will take us.

What we will learn and uncover.

I am so grateful to welcome 25 of you!

There are 151 (+5) of you on Spotify 🥹

And 436 (+20) on YouTube.

Gosh, it’s starting to snowball… and I’m ready for it.

Let’s do this together.

From the bottom of my heart,

thank you.

For giving me a place to be me,

be authentic, and for following along my Fumbles,

listening and being on this journey with me,

learning and growing together,

and holding me as ‘OK’.

If you haven’t already done so,

please do ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’

so we can keep this community growing.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie

x

I made an ADHD booboo, this was filmed before the last ep, right before my holiday, which you can clearly see I needed!So just pretend you haven't seen the other one yet.And if you haven't, go straight to the previous ep for a surprise. So in this episode, I'm exploring the burnout - what it feels like, any triggers, so I can hopefully prevent it from happening again in the future. I believe burnout is the result of the following drivers: Be Perfect, Work Hard, and Be Strong, which I think also display as ADHD/ASD symptoms. As you can see from the previous episode, a break is what I needed, not an expensive holiday; to just put everything down. When you're burnt-out, just STOP! The world will not fall apart without you. And don’t catastrophise, nothing lasts forever, so if you’re scared to stop, it incase you can’t get back to it, trust me, someone who’s suffered with extreme depression and been bed bound for months, it does come to an end. It did before, it will again. Take the sick day. You're not 100% so you're not well! You know you always push through when you're not well, so you know when you’re not well, you just can’t give yourself the permission to rest, why? You need the day off, you just struggle with the internal rules you have, and feel you can't take a day off. Would you do this to your best friend? Child? Elderly gran? Take the day, work will survive without you. Rest. My body is telling me what it needs. So I’m making a new decision; listening to it. The only person who is ever there for you, is you. If you don't show up for you, no one will. When you do rest, and recharge your batteries, work is easier, socialising is fun instead of draining, life is just easier. Take the break. Meet your needs! Rest, sleep, put your phone down, play a game, go for a walk, see a friend. Look after yourselves! I am so happy to welcome another 5 of you! There are 146 of you on Spotify 🥹 And 416 on YouTube. How wonderful to know I could be having a positive impact on all of you! From the bottom of my heart, thank you. For giving me a place to be me, be authentic, and for following along my Fumbles, listening and being on this journey with me, learning and growing together, and holding me as ‘OK’. If you haven’t already done so, please ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’ so we can keep this community growing. As always, see you in the episode! I’ll trust you to keep yourself OK. Keep Fumbling Forward, Frankie x

Every time I come to write these descriptions I think, “where do I start?”.

To sum it all up in a nutshell,

I went on holiday and this was filmed when I came back.

After weeks of knowing I needed to stop,

putting my foot down and doing it,

it was everything I needed.

I came back refreshed

recharged

and with new realisations.

If you feel you need a break,

and you’re body and mind are telling you to,

make it happen!

Or your body will take one for you.

This episode goes through it all in detail.

I realise why I’ve been so unregulated…

it was under my nose the whole time

and let you in on how my ADHD has impacted my finances.

I share theories / things to think about:

Time structuring

Narcissism

Regulation / Trauma / PTSD / Alexithymia,

Talk about my therapy,

anxiety, PTSD, EMDR etc

(TW keep yourselves safe)

and a lot more.

Oh and.. I watched the beginning of Freud’s last session,

He & Einstein concluded that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

So my brain then asked the question:

“Does that mean sanity is being able to choose to do something different?

Aka autonomy?

I might just be veering into a Philosophy career.

I am so happy to welcome another 6 of you!

There are 141 of you on Spotify 🥹

And 416 on YouTube.

How wonderful to know I could be having a positive impact on all of you!

From the bottom of my heart,

thank you.

For giving me a place to be me,

to be authentic, and for following along my Fumbles,

listening along this journey with me,

learning and growing together,

and holding me as ‘OK’.

If you haven’t already done so,

please ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie

x

It was so fun to do a hungover episode;

“Hungover at work?!”

Old Frankie would be terrified if you knew that.

But I’m human, and it’s ok to be hungover…

It’s quite funny actually,

me drinking… who would have thought.

This episode was healing to edit and listen back to.

When this was filmed back in July,

I had one hell of a month,

lots of bad news,

uncertainty about my home, finances,

and lots of judgement, criticism and assumptions around my weight loss.

I feel like somebody I have always wanted to be,

so confident in herself and resilient.

Knows who she is, and is not bothered by others.

I'm hoping that's what you can take from this,

that you can absorb some of my OKness,

and start to feel that, no matter what other people say or do,

that you will be okay,

and you WILL be okay,

because you have you.

Be there for you.

If you really show up for yourself,

you will always feel confident,

because you will always have yourself,

and if you always show up,

you’ll always know you’ll be there.

I’ll share a theory with you,

love some psycho-education,

which will help you to navigate how you’re feeling,

and be able to question what’s happening in the dramaaaas,

and provide you a tool to help you in those moments,

to help you get back to feeling OK.

No matter what happens,

I believe I will be able to solve the issue or situation,

and that gives me a confidence,

to go ahead and do what I need to do,

or what I want to do.

I am so happy to welcome another 5 followers!

there are 135 of you on Spotify 🥹

And 416 on YouTube.

Thank you.

For following my Fumbles,

listening and being on this journey with me,

trying to understand,

and holding me as ‘OK’.

If you haven’t already done so,

please go ahead and ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie

x

Join me for an intimate exploration of self-discovery

where I explore whats needed

for a healthy formation of identity,

and the challenges of mental health.

I’ll share my experiences with ADHD medication,

the hurdles of money management,

and the powerful ways our bodies can influence our minds.

We'll explore the somatic realm,

those physical sensations that speak volumes

and the world of ‘transference’.

If you've ever questioned your connections with others

or hesitated before responding,

this episode offers reflections and strategies

that just might resonate and help.

Themes:

1. Self-Discovery: Exploring my identity and understanding myself.

   
   

2. Mental Health: Discussing challenges related to anxiety, anorexia, ADHD, and the impact of medication.

   
   

3. ‘Healthy Narcissism’: Heinz Kohut’s 3 needs crucial for healthy self-development and identity formation, which if are inadequately fulfilled, may cause issues related to self-esteem, identity, and interpersonal relationships.

   
   

4. Somatic Experiences: Understanding how the body communicates emotions and physical responses to psychological stress.

   
   

5. Transference and Counter-Transference: Examining relational dynamics and interactions, how others may be effecting you.

   
   

6. Financial Management: Reflecting on personal struggles with money and the emotional aspects of spending and budgeting.

   
   

7. Emotional Awareness: Recognising and addressing feelings that arise in different situations, including avoidance and the influence of relationships.

   
   

8. Boundaries and Self-Care: Discussing the need for setting personal boundaries and finding healthier strategies for emotional regulation.

   
   

9. Reflection and Insight: Emphasising the value of self-reflection in personal growth and learning from experiences.

   
   

Thank you for following my Fumbles,

listening,

being on this journey with me,

trying to understand,

and holding me as ‘OK’.

If you haven’t already done so,

please go ahead and ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’,

it will help reach others like us.

As always, see you in the episode!

I’ll trust you to keep yourself OK.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie

x

Following on from the last Ep in April when I had no shower,

the bathroom saga continues.

Ever tried being your authentic self

whilst being a die hard people pleaser

with perfectionistic beliefs

in the midst of a full-blown bathroom renovation

and severe sensory sensitivities?

(It’s actually comical, and I’m laughing typing this, no wonder I was struggling!

This is the worst situation for someone like me!)

Join me as I finally allow myself to vent about life's not-so-shiny moments. Turns out, our environments really do mess with our minds! Don’t discount it!

From wondering if my quirks might be Autism

(or just trauma in a clever disguise?)

to wrestling with ADHD paralysis (or is it just hypo-arousal?

The theories are endless…

maybe trying to figure it out is where I’m going wrong.

Either way, this podcast is my brave, unfiltered journey

of trying to make sense of it all

and accept myself, as I am.

Oh, and I took action today!

If hanging up clothes sounds like a big deal to you,

well, YOU, are EXACTLY my people.

Tune in for the raw, the real, and the ridiculous,

as I come to terms with being left out,

realising the world isn’t about me,

and maybe how people treat me is nothing to do with me,

and figuring out when to journal,

when to see to my therapist,

and when speak to you guys.

Thank you,

for following my Fumbles,

listening to me,

being patient with me,

and holding me as ‘OK’.

See you in the episode :)

Frankie x

If you haven’t already done so,

please click the ‘Follow’ or ‘Subscribe’ button,

it will really help the podcast

reach other Fumblers,

and may help to gain some sponsorship

to enable me to dedicate more time and resources to the poddy.

As always, see you in the episode!

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie x

💕

Recorded Apr 2024: What could go wrong, did go wrong, and buoy, did it rock my boat! (Get it? Buoy..) I was sailing smoothly until I hit the iceberg of dysregulation, and upon reflection, it all becomes clear. Invalidation, discrimination, no shower or hot water, disrupted routines, 'right person wrong time' and dysregulation. Grab your life jackets and tune in to hear about the waves trying to capsize my ship. (Respecting others in my life and keeping some details brief and surface level, I appreciate your understanding, whilst I try to still paint a picture without the details).

What’s surprisingly nice is that I haven’t sunk back into my depression hole. Why? Because I have myself! Who knew self-love was the ultimate life raft. When you’ve got your own back, you can navigate through anything. So, whether you're in a storm or just waiting for the next episode of life to drop, self-care is key! Keep that going, and you might even find enjoyment along the way.

Was it the right person at the wrong time, or just the wrong person? Have they really changed, or did fate just have my back? Who knows! But everything led me here, and I love where I am. Grateful, thankful and blessed.

There's so many what-ifs floating around, so if we can focus on facts, reality, and our own thoughts and feelings, life becomes a lot easier, and surprisingly less disappointing, kind of like a good pizza without pineapple. (No offence intended).

My thoughts are with anyone who’s been hit by the waves discussed in this episode.

As always, sending my very best wishes,

F x

First things first, everyone's definition of success varies. Mine is pretty standard, but any neurodivergent’s dream: being able to function, being productive, feeling regulated, and feeling OK.

I am a firm believer that me and any other neurodivergent person has a very special gift. We think outside the box and have the ability to be an Einstein, who by the way I think also had ADHD:

“Whilst neurodivergent disabilities were not researched enough to be diagnosed during the life of Einstein, modern specialists researching him have diagnosed him with ADHD, dyslexia and autism”.

- StudentNews 2024, Manchester University, Manchester.ac.uk

If we can harness our abilities, we too can be Avengers/Xmen.

(Side note: highly recommend the new Deadpool X Wolverine film 🍿 but wear ear plugs or avoid iMax trailer as I had a panic attack with the awesome ‘experiential sound’ iMax advert, movie was 10/10 though, but yes sensory overload was wow).

I fumbled upon a wonderfully productive morning (when I filmed this in January 2024), so I thought I'd share with you some of the things I had done then and have continued to do, that enable me to feel productive and positive.

In Psycho-ed terms, these are things that calm my ANS [Automatic Nervous System], and keep that little devil, the Amygdala, switched off and away from Fight, Flight, Freeze, Flop).

ADHD from my understanding is de-regulation, living in a fight or flight response, so my methods, revolve around regulation and healing.

I hope this helps you too fellow fumblers / neuro-pick-n-mix-ers

(I dont like spicy food, but I love picknmix, so I've changed the term 'neuro-spicy' to 'neuro-picknmix'). You heard it here first ;)

As always, thank you for your patience whilst I edit and upload,

I will always eventually get round to it, but it seems the more I focus on self care, (the exact content of this episode), the more I am able to get these up quicker!

Sending best wishes,

See you in the episode :)

Frankie x

Spoiler alert:When you stop trying to change,  you will change.

Join me in going back in time! This episode was recorded in April, after 4 months of feeling pretty pooey. I hadn’t recorded an episode for 3 and a half months, and didn’t think I would be recording for a while…

But my fairy godmother (Therapist), helped pull me from the clouds, so with a new found belief of, ‘it doesn’t have to be perfect, just do it anyway’, I whipped out my phone, 

driving in the pouring rain, and shared my brainwaves.

⚠️This episode comes with a Trigger Warning ⚠️ there are mentions of trauma, panic, anxiety, dissociation, and physical abuse. It’s not detailed, or in depth, but may bring up stuff for you, so the content warning is there for your protection. 

Please keep yourselves safe and opt not to listen if there might be a trigger for you. I’m aware some of you may have similar backgrounds to me, so lean on your self-care,  hobbies, and support systems to keep yourself OK, if anything does come up for you.

Support systems can include but are not limited to:

111 (UK), Mind.org (UK), Samaritans (UK),

Better help, your Doctor, therapist, 

friends, Family, and a google search for “services for mental health near me”.

Thank you for Fumbling with me, and being patient whilst I edited this episode. It was important for me to take care with what I did and didn’t want to share.

Thank you fellow Fumblers, for following my Fumbles, 

listening to me, and holding me as ‘OK’.

If you haven’t already done so, please hit the ‘Follow’ button,

it’s really helpful to reach other ADHD/neurospicey Fumblers, just like you and I, and may help me gain some sponsorship to enable me to dedicate more time to the poddy.

See you in the episode :)

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie x

Spoiler alert: resisting depression didn't quite work out. Turns out, I needed to embrace my inner Eeyore to let the clouds pass. Join me recapping July, a surprisingly successful month. Each pillar of security was rocked, but I was OK, the not-so-mythical creature 'Motivation' showed up, and the mental sloth took a hike!

How did I go from a state of "I'm a potato" to "I'm (somehow) functional"? Self-regulation, a super therapist, creating a cocoon of safety within and outside of myself, and doing what I knew all along I needed to do. 

Is healing in sight? Or is my prefrontal cortex finally flexing its muscles? 

Let's keep Fumbling Forward together, one laugh, one lesson, and one 'aha' moment at a time.

Frankie x

Welcome to the most authentic and symptomatic neurodivergent episode yet. Buckle up for a wild ride where I explain how I’ve conquered the ADHD paralysis beast, got excited about the future, and started to feel motivated again! Motivation, you say, I thought that was a mythical creature that was prescribed by psychiatrists. 

I've been dodging the older episodes like dodgeballs, and today, I'm giving my perfectionist a heart attack and uploading this more recent gem from July 15th, 2024. On this magical day, I overcame my ADHD paralysis and want to share how. I will get round to the others… thank you for your patience and understanding. 

Get ready for the unedited, raw, unfiltered reality of my life. You'll see me melting down at random noises, struggling to focus, and switching to freeze mode faster Hussain Bolt. And you’re in for a treat, you'll witness my frustration levels hitting 3/10 on the anger scale, which to me feels completely unacceptable. Spoiler alert: Emotions are real people, and I'm here to make them permissible, even if it makes me look like a 'psycho' (thanks for that, society and childhood trauma).

So grab your popcorn, enjoy the rollercoaster, and leave a comment in our shiny new comment section! Let's build a community of support, laughter, and shared chaos.

Frankie x

Before I finish the book, here's some of the information I found extremely helpful, what will help you to 'cure' your ADHD if done repetitively over time, to rewire, and create those neural pathways in your brain that didn't develop.

This book has explained how emotions create the structures in your brain, the release of certain neuro-chemicals, and thus the development of your brain. What you will hear me talk about in this episode, it's about how Neurodivergence, or ADHD, is where your brain hasn't been able to develop properly. In my last episode I talked about deficits, if you didn't reach certain milestones cognitively, they are not developed (deficits), but our brains have neuroplasticity, it can develop over time, just like a muscle. If you meet those deficits or needs that didn't get met, this will develop your brain and consequently heal ADHD. I'm not sure if this is something that will completely heal, or the symptoms will just get less severe; a lot of the source of my ADHD comes down to my primary attachment figure which is created whilst you're in utero, and primarily the first nine months after being born, but continues to develop through childhood. This is to say that my attachment with my mum and environment for us as a family during my childhood is what I believe has caused my ADHD. I'm not sure if it's possible to change your attachment, but whether my perception or ability to navigate that relationship will help me heal and develop that attachment is something I don't know yet but think is absolutely possible as I've seen hints of change/acceptance on my part. So as I continue to read the book I'm sure I will get the answers and share them, but for now here is my current working hypothesis.

And whilst you're at it, here's what made me have such a lovely morning this morning… because, this is a diary as well, somewhere for me to reflect back and remind myself of what works for me, because I forget lots of things. I think I might have ADHD.

Keep Fumbling Forward,

Frankie x

(I did a much longer description in my email list and will add to a blog on my website, if you want to read it/sign up, hit me up!)

When we experience a loss of any kind, (i.e. breakup, death or job), there is a hurricane of emotions that can follow. Emotions are wonderful things, but at times, overwhelming. They're trying to talk to us, and sometimes our fear of being absorbed and consumed by them, can stop us from allowing them through to listen to what they have to say. And when we do let them through, sometimes they're confusing; we can be sad when we're actually angry, and angry when we're actually scared! Emotions are a maze to navigate, so this episode dives into those overwhelming feelings of anger, sadness and guilt that come along with grief, and might help you Fumble Forward, a little better.

A note from me:

On a separate note, this journey is scary for me, there's so many unknowns and what if's, but also exciting things coming that I can't wait to share with you. So rather than backing away because I'm scared, I'm stepping into my bravery boots, (big girl pants), and enjoying the rollercoaster even though I'm a little scared. "Feel the fear and do it anyway". Something I picked up a while ago is that fear and excitement are from the same place and can often be confused for one another, so is it that I'm scared, or is it that I'm excited? A little bit of both – but what I know is I'm really enjoying this journey, so I'm going to stay at it for a little longer. Thank you Fumblers who have followed and listened; we are now at 77 followers, a number I never thought we would see! Seeing those numbers grow, has encouraged me to keep going - so thank you, and let's go!

Enjoy the episode, let me know your thoughts below, and any other subjects you want me to cover. If you want to remain anonymous, there is a feedback link on my Instagram.

Frankie x