Inspired by Frank Ocean – Channel ORANGE (2012)
What happens when the things we place our faith in—love, institutions, people, ideas—fail us?
In this week’s episode, I reflect on Bad Religion and how it captures the spiritual unraveling that comes from unrequited love and misplaced devotion. We talk about the personal and the political: from one-sided relationships and neurodivergent hyperfixation, to collective disillusionment in elected leaders and the systems meant to protect us.
It’s about grief. It’s about rebuilding. It’s about learning not to worship the things that harm us.
🎧 Tune in for honesty, memory, and music as medicine.
In this week’s episode, we’re getting vulnerable — peeling back the layers on the chaotic, beautiful, and bittersweet mess that is our twenties. Inspired by Givēon’s track from Beloved, I’m reflecting out loud on everything this decade has taught me so far: heartbreak, healing, missteps, self-sabotage, growth, and grace.
This one has been sitting in the vault for a minute… but the mic felt safe enough to finally speak on it. We talk about the loneliness of adulting, the exhaustion of overfunctioning, and what it means to stop performing for love and start showing up for yourself instead.
Because healing doesn’t always come in perfect soundbites. Sometimes it comes through processing out loud.
🌀 Press play and lean in. You’re not alone in the ebbs and flows of your twenties.
In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Maya takes listeners on a raw, poetic, and reflective journey through her lived experience as a survivor, and as the daughter of one. Inspired by Kendrick Lamar’s deeply personal song “Mother I Sober,” this episode explores the intergenerational impact of abuse, the normalization of violence in Black households, and the complex emotions tied to healing, shame, and solitude.
Maya shares intimate memories, discusses the aftermath of trauma, and calls into question the silence and complicity surrounding domestic violence, especially in communities of color. This episode holds space for the heartbreak, the rage, the processing, and the hope. If you’ve ever struggled to name what happened to you, or needed a mirror for your pain, this one’s for you.
💜 You are not alone.
📚 Resources for Survivors & Supporters:
National Domestic Violence Hotline
📞 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
📱 Text "START" to 88788
🌐 thehotline.org
RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)
📞 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
🌐 rainn.org
Love Is Respect (Support for young people & dating violence)
📞 1-866-331-9474
📱 Text "LOVEIS" to 22522
🌐 loveisrespect.org
Therapy for Black Girls
🌐 therapyforblackgirls.com
BEAM (Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective)
🌐 beam.community
Trigger Warning: This episode contains descriptions of physical, emotional, and generational abuse that may be upsetting or activating for some listeners. Please take care while listening.
🖤
Follow us on Instagram: @ebbnflowpodcast
Inspired by “Special” by SZA
What happens when the person who broke your heart becomes everything you wished they were... but for someone else? What do you do when the softness you once carried so proudly feels like it’s gone forever?
In this episode, I reflect on what it means to lose touch with your former self, especially after being deeply vulnerable with someone who couldn’t meet you there. I open up about the grief of watching someone else receive the version of them you begged for… while you’re left trying to remember who you used to be.
We talk about avoidant attachment, mirroring behaviors as a neurodivergent survival mechanism, emotional numbness, and the confusing intersection of healing and shutting down.
Maybe you feel less expressive. Maybe solitude feels safer. Maybe you're scared you’ll never feel as deeply again. You're not alone.
This is a love letter to everyone in their numb era, questioning their identity, and trying to rebuild their sense of special.
Sometimes love and loyalty are not the same thing. In this week’s episode, I’m diving into what it really means to hold your friends accountable...especially when they’re out here doing wild, harmful shit and no one is checking them. Inspired by Jack Harlow’s “Gang Gang Gang,” we’re talking about complicity, betrayal, and the danger of being loyal to people who wouldn’t pass your own moral test if the victim was someone you loved.
I also reflect on my own experiences - navigating friendship, betrayal, and what it means to take your power back after silence. If this one hits a nerve... good. It’s meant to.
🔗 TW: betrayal, emotional manipulation, abuse
🎧 Tune in. This one’s for the people who actually want to do better.
In this episode of Ebb & Flow, Maya enters a new season: the "No. 1" era. Inspired by the song by Tyla ft. Tems, this episode is a raw exploration of what it means to put yourself first, unapologetically.
From the high of feeling free after letting go, to the quiet struggle of learning radical accountability, Maya reflects on past patterns, over-investing in others, and the process of reclaiming her power through intentional solitude. If you've ever felt the urge to shut the world out just to hear your own thoughts, this one’s for you.
💭 Topics covered:
Choosing yourself without guilt
Healing from emotional overexposure
Nervous system regulation and safety
Accountability without shame
Finding power in solitude
Learning to stop begging and start receiving
Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussion of suicide, suicidal ideation, and mental health struggles. Listener discretion is advised.
In honor of Suicide Prevention Day, I sat down with my best friend Bre Banks — a licensed clinical social worker and therapist — for an honest, deeply personal conversation about mental health, the quiet signs we often overlook, and what it means to truly listen before someone goes.
This episode explores how trauma, neurodivergence, and emotional suppression can show up in our day-to-day lives, and how grace, curiosity, and authentic connection can help us break through the silence.
We talk about what it means to check in with ourselves and others, how to support friends without over-functioning, and what healing really looks like when you’re still in the thick of it.
This isn’t a sad episode — it’s a real one. And if you’ve ever felt like the world was too loud and no one could hear you, I hope this one finds you gently.
Inspired by Mariah the Scientist. A vulnerable check-in on self-awareness and the quiet ways we self-destruct: overdoing it, staying where we don’t belong, telling ourselves lies that facts can’t seem to fix. Maya shares a turning point—learning to ask for help—and unpacks the “strong Black woman” cape she never asked to wear.
She closes with her notes for the week: I am enough. I am smart. I am a great friend. It is okay to ask for help when I need it. Share yours and tag the pod to keep the conversation going.
IG: @ebbnflowpodcast @mayanders_
This world expects Black women to be unbreakable, resilient, strong, and unshakable. That's cool and all... but I'm not auditioning to be Superwoman anymore. In this kickoff to Ebb & Flow, I talk about why I created this space, the territory that comes with being a neurodivergent black woman, and what I'm doing to 'Pipe Down' the intrusive thoughts that tell me to 'get over it' so I can hear myself think more clearly. We'll get into boundaries, anger without shame, softness that isn't weakness, and the messy middle that is healing. It's raw, honest and personal. Exactly what this show is meant to be.
If it resonates: follow, rate, and share with a friend. Leave a comment!
IG: @ebbnflowpodcast @mayasanders_
Welcome to Ebb and Flow — a podcast for the deeply feeling, the healing, and the ones still figuring it all out.
I’m Maya Sanders, a neurodivergent Black woman navigating trauma, identity, and the rhythm of becoming.
In this space, I share personal reflections through storytelling and music — with each episode titled after a song that helped me process what I couldn’t put into words.
This isn’t a how-to. It’s a come-as-you-are.
🎧 New episodes every Wednesday. Tap in and ride the wave.