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What To Do When
Kathleen McBride
86 episodes
6 days ago
For overthinkers, feelers + recovering chill girls. This podcast is part voice note, part pep talk, part “I probably shouldn’t tell this story, but here we are.” We spiral, we cry, we self-reflect — then we figure out what the hell to do next. Messy, hilarious, real AF healing for people who are tired of pretending they’re fine. Created by Kathleen McBride — coach, counsellor + emotionally intelligent chaos human.
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Self-Improvement
Education
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All content for What To Do When is the property of Kathleen McBride and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
For overthinkers, feelers + recovering chill girls. This podcast is part voice note, part pep talk, part “I probably shouldn’t tell this story, but here we are.” We spiral, we cry, we self-reflect — then we figure out what the hell to do next. Messy, hilarious, real AF healing for people who are tired of pretending they’re fine. Created by Kathleen McBride — coach, counsellor + emotionally intelligent chaos human.
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Self-Improvement
Education
Episodes (20/86)
What To Do When
86. Where does it hurt? For when you’re not ‘fine.’

I know we all say “it’s okay not to be okay” but when it’s actually you who’s not okay, it usually doesn’t feel that way, does it?

This week I’ve been sitting in that space, the one where your brain is desperate to minimise, distract, and pretend everything’s fine, when it’s really not.
And honestly, it’s been confronting to notice how fast I want to move on, fix, support everyone else, and avoid my own pain.

In this episode I talk about what happens when we can’t just “get on with it,” how our protective parts try to save us from feeling, and what it looks like to slow down and ask ourselves:

“Where does it actually hurt?”

This one’s tender. It’s honest. It’s not tied up with a bow.
But if you’ve been trying to hold it together lately, this one’s for you. From my tender heart to yours.

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3 weeks ago
22 minutes 30 seconds

What To Do When
85. When You Feel Behind (again) aka the end of year scaries

You know that weird energy that hits around this time of year?
The “how is it already October?” panic, the guilt of unfinished goals, and the quiet shame that whispers you should’ve done more.

In this episode, we’re talking about the end of year scaries, that mix of scarcity, fear, and comparison that creeps in when you realise 2025 is almost over and you’re not where you thought you’d be.

We’ll unpack:
✨ Why “falling behind” is a story your fear tells, not the truth
✨ How to move from shame into self-belief
✨ The difference between chasing goals from fear vs. alignment
✨ How to come back to your values, your timing, and your purpose
✨ And the powerful reflection question to help you do what actually matters

Because 2025 isn’t over.
You’re not behind.
You’re becoming.

Your job now? To take one small, brave step toward living in alignment with what truly matters, not just for the rest of this year, but for the rest of your life.

Journal prompt:
What’s one area of my life where I’m not living in alignment with my values?
And what’s one small step I can take this week to change that?

🎧 Listen now and get ready to finish 2025 doing what matters, not what’s expected.

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1 month ago
16 minutes 13 seconds

What To Do When
84. Your Permission Slip to PIVOT (Even When Your Brain Says You Have to Stick It Out)

Ever felt trapped in a job, relationship, or plan that looks “perfect on paper” but feels completely wrong in your body?
This episode is your official permission slip to pivot.

We’re breaking down:
✨ Why we cling to things that aren’t working (hello conditioning)
✨ The difference between resistance vs. misalignment
✨ How pivoting is actually self-leadership, not failure

If you’ve been waiting for a sign to change direction, this is it.

🔗 Want deeper support in navigating your pivots and building a life that feels aligned? Come work with me inside my 1:1 program HEAL, explore the program + book in your free connection call here: https://www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching


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1 month ago
11 minutes 50 seconds

What To Do When
83. You’re Craving Soulmate Friendships

Ever look at other people’s friendships and wonder why it feels so hard for you?
Like everyone else has their “soulmate friends” while you’re stuck with surface-level connections, loneliness, or just a nagging sense that something’s missing?

In this episode of What To Do When… I’m talking about the real, messy truth of building friendships as an adult. Because here’s the thing: friendships massively impact your mental health — but they’re also the pillar we often put the least effort into.

I share:
✨ My own seasons of loneliness and “cocooning” where friendships felt slim or fake
✨ Why building strong friendships is actually a skill (not just “luck”)
✨ The fears, wounds, and social myths that make adult friendships so hard
✨ How to get clear on the kind of friendships you want (just like dating)
✨ Tools to put yourself out there, navigate rejection, and find your people
✨ How to handle common struggles — like what to do when a friend hurts you or when a connection feels one-sided

This one’s part story, part pep talk, and part practical coaching. If you’ve been craving those soulmate-level friendships — the kind that make you feel seen, safe, and supported — this episode is for you.

👉 Share this with a friend who needs to hear it, or use it as a reason to finally reach out and reconnect.

And if you’re ready to go deeper — building self-trust, confidence, and relationships that actually feel good — comment HEAL on my latest post or reach out to learn more about my 1:1 coaching program.

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1 month ago
24 minutes 9 seconds

What To Do When
82. From Stuck to Starting (I Ghosted My Own Podcast for 2 Months)

Ever fallen off something important to you — a goal, a project, a practice, a dream — and then found every excuse in the book not to start again? Yep… same.

This is my big, messy comeback episode. After ghosting my own podcast for 2 months (🙃), I’m pulling back the curtain on:

✨ Why shame is the real thing that keeps us stuck (not the falling off itself)
✨ How to reconnect with your WHY when the motivation feels dead and buried
✨ The barriers we build that make starting harder than it needs to be (and how to remove them)
✨ Stories of people who started messy and imperfect — and still made it work
✨ A reminder that your future self will thank you for starting now, not perfectly

This episode is short, sharp, and real — like a voice note from a friend reminding you that you don’t need a studio, a perfect plan, or a shiny new notebook to start. You just need to begin again, right where you are.

So if you’ve been waiting for a sign to stop ghosting your own dreams… this is it. 🫶

👉 If you loved this episode, share it with a friend who’s been putting off their own big idea. And if you’re ready to go deeper into your own healing + self-leadership journey, you can connect with me here.

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1 month ago
21 minutes 44 seconds

What To Do When
81. The Girls Get Off Episode (and Honestly, So Should You): Vibrators, Shame & the Orgasm Gap

If you’ve ever felt shame around pleasure, been nervous about trying sex toys, or wondered how the hell to ask for what you actually like in bed — this episode is your new safe space.

Kathleen is joined by Viv from Girls Get Off — the powerhouse brand behind some very buzzy bedside drawer staples — for a no-filter conversation on all things pleasure, desire, and ditching the shame.

They get into:
→ The real reason so many women still struggle with receiving pleasure
→ The orgasm gap (and how to actually close it)
→ Sex toy 101: a breakdown of the types + how to explore them without the overwhelm
→ How to talk about sex without spiralling into “Do they think I’m weird now?”
→ And why connecting to your pleasure isn’t just sexy… it’s healing.

This one’s equal parts spicy, empowering and giggle-worthy. And yes — it’s VERY R18. Plug in your headphones, babe.


Resources mentioned:
→ Girls Get Off Website
→ Girls Get Off Instagram
→ GGO Facebook Community Group
→ Yoni Mapping Practitioners
→ Anal Dilation 101 (yes, we went there)
→ Becoming Cliterate by Laurie Mintz
→ Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski


✨ Want to keep healing and reconnecting with your body, mind and self-worth?
Join Kathleen’s 1:1 program HEAL — designed to help you unpack the beliefs, patterns, and parts that have kept you stuck in self-abandonment, anxiety, and shame.
More on HEAL here → https://www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching

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4 months ago
1 hour 5 minutes 53 seconds

What To Do When
80. The Rejection Spiral: How to Stop Abandoning Yourself to Be Liked

Feel like you’re too much, not enough, or one awkward text away from being exiled from the group chat?

Yep. Been there.


This episode is for the overthinkers, the approval-seekers, the “they took 3 hours to reply so they probably hate me” crowd.(raising my hand here too).


In this vulnerable, no-fluff chat, we dive deep into:

  • Why rejection spirals hit so hard (hint: it’s not just in your head — it’s in your nervous system)
  • The childhood roots of people-pleasing and self-abandonment
  • What’s really happening when you start performing, shrinking, or over-explaining to stay liked
  • How to move through the fear of rejection without losing yourself in the process


You’ll also learn my go-to practice for building rejection tolerance (yes, that’s a thing), plus practical tools to regulate your nervous system, stop spiralling, and stay connected to you — even when someone else pulls away.

Because confidence isn’t about being liked by everyone. It’s about trusting yourself enough to stay, even when someone else doesn’t.

In this episode, we cover:

  • The biology of rejection and why it feels so unsafe
  • The parts of you that hijack your brain when you spiral
  • How to stop outsourcing your worth
  • What to do instead of shrinking or shapeshifting to fit in
  • Real talk on boundaries, shame, and self-trust
  • “Rejection reps” — how to build emotional resilience without armouring up

This one’s for you if:

  • You feel rejected way more than you’d like to admit
  • You lose yourself trying to be liked
  • You’re exhausted from performing, fixing, or explaining yourself
  • You want to feel grounded even when someone else pulls away
  • You’re ready to stop ghosting yourself just to avoid being ghosted


Mentioned in this episode:
→ HEAL Coaching Program — Join here: https://www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching
→ Follow Kathleen on Instagram @kathleen.mindsetcoach


P.S. Rejection is a normal part of being a human. Abandoning yourself doesn’t have to be.

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4 months ago
34 minutes 17 seconds

What To Do When
79. You’re an Overthinker Who Just Wants To Trust Themselves

If you’ve ever asked everyone else for advice… and still felt more confused, this episode is for you.

This one’s for the deep feelers, the spirallers, the ones who’ve built a voting system just to make a decision — only to feel further away from their own gut.

Inside this episode:

  • Why self-trust is so hard (especially if you’re an overthinker)

  • How childhood and past relationships shape your decision-making patterns

  • What your perfectionist/avoider/inner critic is really trying to protect

  • What a Sense Reset is — and how to use it to interrupt spirals

  • What it actually looks like to rebuild self-trust (without needing to be 100% sure)

You’ll leave this episode feeling less alone in the noise — and more equipped to come home to your own voice.

Try this next:
✨ Download the free Protective Parts Mapping Practice I mentioned in the episode — to meet your inner protectors and start untangling your overthinking loop.
→https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Km7mYM5RltBfpQhGCnm9IVTbKxCX6v5U/view?usp=drive_link

Want to go deeper?
→ DM me the word “HEAL” on Instagram if you’re ready to explore a space for emotional safety, self-trust, and support through the messy middle or learn more about HEAL and 1:1 coaching here: https://www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching

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4 months ago
28 minutes 58 seconds

What To Do When
78. The 5 Stages of Emotional Growth (And Why You’re Not “Behind” in Your Healing)

Ever felt like you're emotionally self-aware but still stuck?
You’ve read the books, listened to the podcasts, analysed your triggers — but nothing’s really changing?

This episode is for you.

Inside today’s solo, I’m walking you through the 5 stages of emotional growth and healing — the exact process I’ve witnessed every single client move through inside my 1:1 coaching program, HEAL.

We explore what it really means to:

  • Move from emotional avoidance to emotional embodiment

  • Feel your feelings in the body — not just talk about them

  • Build emotional capacity

  • Use emotions like anxiety or anger as messengers (instead of things to fix)

  • Let emotional clarity lead to practical, real-life change

I’m also walking you through real-life examples with anxiety and anger so you can see how this process unfolds in everyday moments — and how you can begin applying it to your own healing journey.

This episode will help you locate where you are — and give you language for what’s next.

Resources & Links Mentioned:

🎧 Free Resource: The Emotional Processing Masterclass
This free masterclass walks you through a simple, body-based process to feel your feelings without spiralling — and begin moving from reaction to clarity.

Ready to stop avoiding your feelings — and start healing for real?

This is the exact path we walk inside HEAL, my 1:1 coaching program that blends deep emotional healing with practical change.

Inside HEAL, we move through:
✔️ Building a relationship with your emotions
✔️ Unpacking protective parts and past patterning
✔️ Using your emotional world to guide how you live, relate, work and lead

You’ll be supported through somatic practices, real-time emotional tools, and grounded integration — no more over-intellectualising, no more doing it alone.

✨ DM me HEAL on Instagram to chat about whether it’s the right next step for you
✨ Learn more about the program here: kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching
✨ Book your free 30-min intro call here: tidycal.com/kathleenmindsetcoach/connect

Come say hi on Instagram: @kathleenmindsetcoach

If this episode spoke to you, please share it, leave a review, or send it to a friend who’s ready to meet themselves more honestly.

You’re not behind. You’re becoming.
Let’s walk this path — together.

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5 months ago
24 minutes 57 seconds

What To Do When
77. You're Doing Everything Right But Still Don’t Feel Like Enough

You’re ticking the boxes.
Doing everything “right.”
Showing up, trying, pushing forward.

So why does it still feel like you’re falling behind?
Or worse—like you’re quietly failing at life?

This episode is for the person who looks like they’ve got it all together… but inside, they’re exhausted by the pressure to prove their worth. We’re talking high-functioning anxiety, invisible timelines, and the myth that achieving more will finally make you feel okay.

Inside this episode:

  • The deeper reason you still don’t feel like enough (even when you’re doing it all)

  • Why your brain ties self-worth to productivity—and where that started

  • A personal story I’ve never shared before about achievement, identity and fear of failure

  • How to start getting off the hamster wheel and relate to yourself differently

  • A gentle reminder that you’re probably doing better than you think

If you’ve ever found yourself spiralling in “I should be further along by now,” this one’s going to meet you right where you are.

✨ Mentioned in this episode:

  • Free 5-Day Inner Child Healing Challenge – Start here if you're new to this work: https://kathleenmindsetcoach.myflodesk.com/c99440de-5165-4166-b6b3-012465456e8b

  • HEAL – 1:1 Coaching Support – Explore the offer: https://www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching

  • Book a Free Connection Call – Let’s see if it’s a fit: https://tidycal.com/kathleenmindsetcoach/connect

Let’s connect:
Instagram: @kathleen.mindsetcoach
Website: www.kathleenmindsetcoach.com

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5 months ago
27 minutes 50 seconds

What To Do When
76. Boundary Setting for More Love, Not Less

In this episode, we’re flipping the script on boundaries. If you’ve ever felt like setting boundaries makes you mean, cold, or too much — or if you’ve used boundaries as a way to keep people out rather than let the right people in — this one’s for you.


I’m sharing how I used to use boundaries as a defence mechanism — a way to protect myself from discomfort and avoid hard conversations. And how I’ve come to realise that real, healthy boundaries aren’t about pushing people away... they’re about opening your heart with clarity, not chaos.


We dive into:


  • What open-hearted boundaries actually are (and what they’re NOT)
  • Why boundaries aren’t about controlling others — they’re about trusting yourself
  • How to set boundaries without guilt, shame, or shutting down
  • The connection between people-pleasing and boundary avoidance
  • Tangible tips to communicate your needs with love, not fear


Whether you’re a recovering people-pleaser, someone afraid to rock the boat, or just ready to stop abandoning yourself — this episode will help you set boundaries that create more connection, not less.


💛 Want support with this work?


I offer 1:1 coaching for people ready to stop people-pleasing, start honouring their truth, and build real confidence.


👉 Book a free 30-minute connection session here: https://tidycal.com/kathleenmindsetcoach/connect


🎁 Free Resource Mentioned:


Want access to my emotional processing masterclass — the one that’s helped so many people get unstuck and learn to feel again?


→ DM me EMOTIONS on Instagram + your best email address or email me at kathleenmindsetcoach@gmail.com and I’ll send it your way.


💭 Journal Prompt:
What’s one moment recently where you abandoned your needs to keep the peace?


What would a loving boundary have looked like instead?


✨ If this episode resonated, share it with a friend or leave a quick review — it helps this little podcast reach more people who need it 💛

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6 months ago
41 minutes 2 seconds

What To Do When
75. Getting High on Your Own Supply: The Science of Self-Love

In a world that teaches us to chase love, validation, and approval from everyone but ourselves—what happens when we flip the script?

In this episode, we're talking all things self-love—the kind that's rooted in science, self-compassion, and real inner safety. We unpack the lies we've been fed about what it means to love yourself (spoiler: it's not cringe, it's revolutionary), how society polices confidence, and why self-love is often misunderstood as bubble baths and skincare.

You'll walk away with a powerful new lens on:

  • Why seeking external validation is the norm—but not the vibe

  • The difference between self-care and true self-love

  • How to rewire your relationship with your inner critic

  • The science behind self-compassion and its wild impact on your brain and body

  • Tangible tools to shift from self-critical to self-kind

And if no one's told you lately: You're allowed to love the hell out of yourself. Loudly. Proudly. Unapologetically.

🔗 Resources & Mentions

  • Research by Dr. Kristin Neff on Self-Compassion

  • Self-Compassion free downloadable guided practice: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1GBLeEMsZinMQ790abnb_ywjmrPVWalpD/view?usp=sharing

  • Want to work with me 1:1 - book a free connection call to chat 1:1 and see if we’re a powerful fit for this next season of life:https://tidycal.com/kathleenmindsetcoach/connect



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6 months ago
41 minutes 30 seconds

What To Do When
74. You're in the Chaos of Change

Ever expected change to feel exciting and empowering—only to find yourself deep in anxiety, overthinking, and overwhelm the minute you take a step forward?

In this episode, we’re getting real about what change actually feels like. Not the Instagram version. The real, messy, chaotic one that brings up old wounds, fear, resistance, and allll the spiraling thoughts.

Kathleen shares personal stories from her recent leap into a new job and starting her counselling studies, and how—even though these were things she wanted—she was smacked in the face with emotional chaos she didn’t expect. We unpack why that happens, how to support yourself through it, and why feeling lost or overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’ve made the wrong decision.

You’ll learn:

  • Why our brains hate change (and how to stop letting that hold you back)

  • How to stop reading resistance as a “sign” to quit

  • What it really means to build a new way of being (and why it’s so damn hard)

  • Kathleen’s top 3 tips for grounding yourself in the chaos

This one’s for you if:→ You're trying to make changes in your life but it feels harder than it "should"→ You're beating yourself up for not having it all figured out→ You want permission to embrace the mess, feel your fear, and go for it anyway

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6 months ago
42 minutes 29 seconds

What To Do When
73. You Don't Know Who You Are Anymore

Ever felt like you’re in between versions of yourself—no longer who you once were, but not quite sure who you’re becoming? Yeah, same.

In this episode, we’re talking about that unsettling space where your old dreams, values, and identity no longer fit, but you’re still figuring out what’s next. Whether you're going through a major life transition, healing deep wounds, or just realizing that what you once wanted… isn’t actually what you want anymore, this one’s for you.

We’re diving into:
✨ Why it’s normal (and actually necessary) to outgrow past versions of yourself
✨ How changing internally can shake up your sense of identity
✨ The pressure to have it all figured out—and why that’s BS
✨ The big, scary, and exciting question: What do I actually want now?

If you’re feeling lost, confused, or in the middle of a major life shift, you’re not alone. Let’s unpack this together.

🎧 Tune in now!

👉 Coaching & Support: kathleenmindsetcoach.com/coaching

👉 Book your connection call: https://tidycal.com/kathleenmindsetcoach/connect

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7 months ago
30 minutes 37 seconds

What To Do When
72. Your Past Slides Into Your DMs - letting the past stay in the past

Ever feel like you’ve moved on, healed, grown… and then BAM! The past comes knocking? Maybe an old relationship resurfaces, a pattern you swore you broke sneaks back in, or you find yourself reacting in ways that feel way too familiar.

Here’s the thing: when the past resurfaces, it’s not a sign you’re back at square one. It’s an invitation to handle things differently this time. In this episode, we’re diving into:

🔥 Why the past keeps showing up (spoiler: it’s not to torture you)
🔥 How to respond instead of react when old wounds get triggered
🔥 What it really means to leave the past in the past
🔥 A powerful self-forgiveness practice to help you release shame & move forward

🎧 Ready to shift the pattern? Tune in now!

👉 FREE Self-Forgiveness Practice: Click here to download
👉 Coaching & Support: kathleenmindsetcoach.com

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7 months ago
32 minutes 28 seconds

What To Do When
71. Why NOT you? How to meet the limits stopping you from having it all in 2025.

Why NOT you? Do you believe you can have it all? Its a new year baby, goals, dreams and resolutions are about to be set — but do you know what’s getting in the way? Limiting stories. Limiting belief systems. Old wounds. Join me in this episode walking you through exercises and mindset shifts to help you see your own blindspots that are keeping you stuck in old patterns and get clear on whats really important to you in 2025. More heart. Less ego.


Connect with me @kathleen.mindsetcoach on IG or FB and email kathleenmindsetcoach@gmail.com


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10 months ago
27 minutes 55 seconds

What To Do When
70. You're stuck in an end of year comparison SPIRAL

Ever feel like the end of the year sneaks up, brings a megaphone, and shouts: “You haven’t done enough!”? As you see other people celebrating their big wins, it’s so easy to fall into the trap of comparison—questioning your progress, your worth, and your future. Suddenly, you’re knee-deep in a spiral of self-doubt and drafting a wild list of ego-driven goals for 2025.

In this episode, we’re talking about:

  • Why the end of the year feels like a productivity report card.
  • How to recognize when you’re in a comparison spiral—and how to pause it.
  • Why your ego loves a shiny, overachieving to-do list (and why you don’t have to follow it).
  • Practical steps to reflect on this year with compassion and plan for next year with alignment.

Let’s leave the shame and should-haves behind and enter 2025 feeling grounded and clear.

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11 months ago
21 minutes 17 seconds

What To Do When
69. you're craving soulmate friendships

Ever look at other people’s friendships — how close and supportive they are — and get just a little... jealous? Wonder if you’re ever going to have those soulmate friendships like you see on Instagram? SAME.

In this episode, we spill the tea on how to actually build those deeper, more meaningful connections. We’re diving into the truth about how friendships can make or break our mental health, and why more friends doesn’t always mean better friendships.

We’ll help you figure out who’s bringing the best energy into your life and how to get real about the energy exchange in your relationships. Vulnerability? Yep, that’s key to unlocking next-level bonds, and we’re here to guide you through it. Let’s be honest — real friendships take effort, and we’re breaking down exactly how to nurture the ones that matter most (without losing yourself in the process).

Key Takeaways:

  • Friendships are the secret sauce to better mental health and fulfilment.
  • More friends ≠ better friendships.
  • Check the vibe — evaluating the energy exchange in your friendships is a game-changer.
  • Who brings out the best in you? Keep them close.
  • Vulnerability is the glue that deepens friendships.
  • Being your authentic self is how you attract your real people.
  • Friendships will get tested during tough times — it's normal.
  • True friends = support and unconditional acceptance.
  • You deserve standards, even in friendships.
  • Building real connections takes effort, but it’s so worth it.

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1 year ago
16 minutes

What To Do When
68. you want to build more CONFIDENCE

In this empowering episode, we dive deep into the world of self-confidence and reveal that it's so much more than just "faking it till you make it." Together, we break down how true confidence is built on a foundation of self-acceptance and authenticity, not perfection or external validation.

Expect an honest conversation about how societal pressures and media often distort our ideas of what confidence should look like—and why embracing your insecurities is key to discovering your real inner strength. We also shed light on how limiting beliefs can hold you back, and how crucial it is to have a strong support system as you work through them.

Key Takeaways:

  • Confidence is a journey, not a destination.
  • True self-confidence comes from owning your abilities, not from being perfect.
  • Embracing insecurities is a powerful step toward feeling genuinely confident.
  • Media and society often give us a false picture of what confidence should be.
  • Confidence starts within—it's about how you see yourself, not how others see you.
  • Limiting beliefs can block your path to confidence, but you can overcome them.
  • Support systems are essential to help you navigate insecurities and self-doubt.
  • The journey to self-acceptance is the foundation of lasting confidence.
  • You are worthy of feeling confident, just as you are!

Join us for an uplifting and eye-opening discussion on building the confidence you truly deserve.


SUBMIT your “What to do when…” question here and we could be answering it on the next episode: ⁠https://forms.gle/wBKswmyFvFfpH4Vk9⁠

Connect with Kathleen @kathleen.mindsetcoach

Connect with Kelsey @bigrigg__

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1 year ago
33 minutes 48 seconds

What To Do When
67. you're struggling with perfectionism

In this episode, we dive deep into the roots of perfectionism, how it often stems from childhood experiences and the pressures we all face in today’s world. 

For many, perfectionism is more than just striving for excellence—it's a coping mechanism, a way to maintain control and protect our self-worth.  

But as we discuss, there's so much power in understanding where this need comes from, so we can start practicing self-compassion instead. 

We talk about how inner child work can help you unravel those old patterns and find balance when perfectionist tendencies take over.

Kelsey also opens up about her own healing journey, sharing how self-acceptance and giving yourself what you truly need can be the game-changer you’ve been searching for. 

If you’ve ever struggled with perfectionism or know someone who has, this episode is full of practical advice, personal insights, and gentle reminders that we’re all a work in progress—and that’s perfectly okay.


SUBMIT your “What to do when…” question here and we could be answering it on the next episode: ⁠https://forms.gle/wBKswmyFvFfpH4Vk9⁠


Connect with Kathleen @kathleen.mindsetcoach

Connect with Kelsey @bigrigg__


Takeaways:

Perfectionism often stems from unmet childhood needs.

It can manifest as a coping mechanism for control.

Understanding the roots of perfectionism can foster self-compassion.

Perfectionism can create a false sense of safety and security.

Healing the inner child is crucial for overcoming perfectionism.

Self-worth is often tied to external validation and control.

Finding balance is key to managing perfectionist tendencies.

Emotional eating can be linked to feelings of control and restriction.

Praise and self-acknowledgment are essential for healing.

It's important to focus on personal growth rather than external standards.

Keywords:

perfectionism, self-worth, inner child, control, emotional eating, mental health, coping mechanisms, self-development, personal growth, self-compassion

Chapters


00:00 Understanding Perfectionism

01:37 Kelsey's Personal Struggles with Perfectionism

04:51 Misconceptions About Perfectionism

08:37 The Need for Control

11:40 Childhood Influences on Perfectionism

18:11 The Journey to Authenticity

24:19 Inner Child Work and Self-Worth

30:56 Finding Empowerment in Healing

39:11 Advice for Overcoming Perfectionism




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1 year ago
44 minutes 44 seconds

What To Do When
For overthinkers, feelers + recovering chill girls. This podcast is part voice note, part pep talk, part “I probably shouldn’t tell this story, but here we are.” We spiral, we cry, we self-reflect — then we figure out what the hell to do next. Messy, hilarious, real AF healing for people who are tired of pretending they’re fine. Created by Kathleen McBride — coach, counsellor + emotionally intelligent chaos human.