Heather Boyd, occupational therapist and mom of 3, shares ways that separation-based advice backfires and what to do instead.
When parents get advice that involves separation without any focus on attachment, it can block a parent's ability to help their children regulate. Whether it’s daytime meltdowns or bedtime shenanigans, separation can feel very alarming.
Listen to this episode for examples of bad separation-based advice that Heather wishes she’d ignored early on in parenting, and what to do instead.
With attachment-based perspectives and tools, as well as self-regulation tools for parents, the focus shifts to connection and co-regulation.
And with connection and co-regulation, the alarm of separation can soften.
Mentioned in this episode:
Gordon Neufeld: “Speak but not too much. Be close but not too close” www.neufeldinstitute.com
Kim Barthell: Be a behaviorual detective. www.kimbarthel.ca
Parent Self-Care Toolkit https://heatherboyd.vipmembervault.com/products/units/view/1239883/?lesson=1601156
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
In Part 2 of Sleep Emergencies, Heather Boyd, occupational therapist and sleep coach, explores a shift she has seen in her private practice away from “preventing” sleep challenges towards more sleep emergencies, and increased parent stress.
The impact on mental health is significant, and getting the appropriate supports is crucial.
At a time when stress and information overwhelm are high, parents who are struggling with their child’s sleep are also experiencing feelings of guilt and shame. This only adds to the burden parents are carrying.
Listen in to explore:
How Bad advice can be worse than no advice at all.
How social media and information overwhelm are making parents feel like they are not measuring up
How to shift to more preventative measures when sleep or parenting are getting challenging
How creating a sleep emergency plan may actually lead to options you have not considered that actually help your baby sleep.
Why getting support can make all the difference
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at familysleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
What is a sleep emergency?
How is it different than difficult sleep that needs coaching.
And when is it a mental health emergency requiring medical attention?
Heather Boyd, occupational therapist and certified infant and family sleep specialist, explores these questions and offers strategies for getting support and managing a sleep emergency including:
Additional Resources:
If you are struggling, call for support without delay: your doctor, your midwife, your therapist or when it is a crisis, 911 or your local crisis line.
Call your local crisis line -in Niagara Ontario it's COAST (Crisis Outreach And Support Team, available 24/7). In the U.S. call the Maternal Mental Health Line (https://mchb.hrsa.gov/programs-impact/national-maternal-mental-health-hotline). Internationally, reach out through Postpartum Support International at https://postpartum.net/ . Go to the Emergency Department or call 911 if you worry that you or your partner or spouse is at risk of harming themselves or their baby.
Getting the support you need matters.
Mentioned in this episode:
The concept of sleep emergencies is from Lyndsey Hookway in a talk a number of years ago. Lyndsey Hookway is an IBCLC and founder of the Holistic Sleep Coach training in the United Kingdom at https://lyndseyhookway.com/hscp/
If you found value in this podcast:
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Sleep associations often get a “bad wrap”, being labelled crutches or bad habits.
In this episode, Heather breaks down what a sleep association is, what it isn’t, and how to appreciate the role sleep associations have in making bedtimes more pleasant.
Sharing parallels with routines and habits we have during the day, as well as sleep associations that we as adults use, Heather makes a case for judgement-free sleep associations and why doing what works, and changing what doesn’t, is a helpful approach at any age.
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Laila, mom of two and host of the popular Learning To Mom Podcast, shares her personal story about discovering what prenatal depression is and why she has come to understand that prenatal depression may have been part of what made her unexpected pregnancy at age 24 so challenging.
This is a heartfelt conversation that runs the gamut from laughter to vulnerability.
Although the circumstances of Laila’s journey are unique to her, and where she found support may be different than for you, her message is important: when you understand your experience, and you know what may be happening to you, it becomes easier to get the support you need to survive and thrive at a very challenging time. It can also reduce the guilt and shame you may be feeling around how you are navigating pregnancy and motherhood.
In this episode:
Laila talks openly about her personal struggles and what helped her.
She outlines the common symptoms of prenatal depression, what the risk factors are, and 8 tips she has for families based on her experience.
If you are struggling with depression (prenatally, postnatally, or outside of pregnancy altogether), talk with your doctor or mental health professional today, be honest with what you are feeling, and get the support you deserve.
If you are the spouse, partner, or loving family member or friend who sees your loved one struggling, do not hesitate to help them get help.
Mentioned in this episode:
Brianna Wiest, on Self-Care https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2024/04/this-is-what-self-care-really-means-because-its-not-all-salt-baths-and-chocolate-cake-2/
Additional Resources:
Prenatal Depression Resources. If you are struggling, call for support without delay: your doctor, midwife your therapist. Call your local COAST (Crisis Outreach And Support Team, available 24/7), or local Mental Health Association (CMHA.ca in Canada). Call 911 if you or your partner or spouse is having a mental health crisis.
Canada’s new (2024) resource for prescription drugs during pregnancy https://www.healthypregnancyhub.ca/ based on research from the https://motherchildcohort.ca/
You can find Laila at:
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at familysleep.ca/podcast
And do ONE THING right this moment that helps you feel grounded –take a deep belly breath, wiggle your toes, make some tea, look up at the stars, or anything else you can do easily that feels good.
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
What if your baby’s sleep was a language you just haven’t become fluent in yet?
It can be frustrating to try to figure out what interrupted sleep, resistant naps, or frequent waking are telling us. But if we start looking at this as a language we can learn, the cues become like words, and patterns begin to form sentences that help us understand what our baby needs.
Mentioned in this episode:
What you can do next:
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Have you been doing “everything right” with your baby’s schedule, following a rigid instructions of a nap and bedtime schedule you found in a book or online and still feel like sleep isn’t working?
Listen to 3 key perspectives that will have you rethinking your relationship to your baby’s sleep schedule.
Ultimately:
What you can do next:
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Whether you are a first-time mom or have multiple kids, there are a few things Heather would want to share with you over a cup of tea (or decaf Americano) to make sleep development easier to navigate.
Listen in as she reassures listeners that:
Your baby is not broken (and you did NOT break their sleep)
Your approach is going to be unique and doesn’t have to follow the rules of any one approach.
There’s no “good enough parent club” you have to tick boxes in to be a member in good standing.
You deserve support and you aren’t supposed to do this all on your own.
Worth exploring after this episode:
What you can do next:
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Angela Sacco talks with Heather about how to give birth through the perspective of yoga.
In the interview we talk about:
How sounds during labour support opening of your cervix (and what sounds to make)
Breath, and its role in birthing your baby
How the vagus nerve supports you in staying in a regulated parasympathetic state and staying out of sympathetic fight or flight
The connection between fear and pain
Visualizing (and how it’s ok if it’s not a strategy that you lean on)
How much a sense of community is underestimated in supporting pregnancy and motherhood
The number one question parents ask Angela
Trusting your instincts
What you really need when you have your baby (spoiler: it’s not as much as you think)
Angela’s roles, past and present, as doula, yoga instructor, and owner of Between Mothers in St. Catharines Ontario
And much more
We also get interrupted by a phone ringing and a cat meowing (#reallife)
To learn more about Angela, go to betweenmothers.ca, facebook.com/betweenmothers
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Don’t miss the next episode of The Baby Sleep Connection: Sign up for weekly baby sleep emails (which includes a heads up when a new podcast episode is released
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
You Ask, I Answer!
Join Heather as she answers questions about how to bridge to the next connection without interrupting the bedtime routine, and how to problem solve 2 hour bedtimes.
She covers:
What is bridging to the next connection?
How to use the Boomerang method of leaving your child at bedtime, but returning before they call out to you (or chase you out of the room!)
Ways to reconnect and build trust that you’re coming back
How to use connection, play, and song to allow sleep to happen.
Why 2 hour bedtimes are usually a timing issue
How to change naps, gaps (between last nap and bedtime), and bedtiming to solve 2 hour bedtimes
How total sleep in a 24 hour period can impact bedtimes and bedtiming
How to use temporarily late bedtimes to eliminate long bedtimes
How to role back bedtime to a reasonable hour!
Mentioned in this episode:
Episode 49 Bridging to the Next Connection https://open.spotify.com/episode/2Js2U8TkS53CdsnBpi1J5d?si=42a7b4021a894f55
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Ask your sleep question! Email Heather at heather@heatherboyd.ca (use the subject line You Ask I Answer Podcast)
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Join Heather Boyd as she talks to Carrie Bennett, a health educator in the emerging field of quantum biology, about using light to optimize health and sleep. Carrie has a background in biology, nutrition and body work. Her work is focused on supporting clients by translating and applying research and knowledge about using light and water for promoting optimal health.
In this episode, Heather and Carrie talk about:
Quantum Biology: what is it?
How to use natural light exposure to improve sleep and health
The value of true darkness at night
The biology of ultraviolet light
What times of day to consider light exposure
Carrie’s simple recommendations for increasing light exposure safely
UVA’s link to serotonin, melatonin, and tryptophan
Sunlight’s link to serotonin and healthy bowel movements
How where you place your lighting impacts your circadian rhythm
Red light blue light: what colour and kind of bulbs are best?
Why you can still get the benefits of light sitting on the grass in the shade of a tree
Mentioned in this episode:
My Circadian App
Hooga lights
The Carnegie Curve
Published Research about concepts covered in this episode:
Red blood cells have a negative charge; zeta potential; Rouleaux Formation https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3415751/
Earthing restores negative charge on red blood cells https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3576907/
Environmental light exposure and melatonin https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9855654/
Where you can find Carrie:
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
In this episode, Heather answers real questions from tired parents looking for solutions.
We cover two questions about independent sleep:
How do I stop holding my 15 month old’s hand for her to fall asleep?
How do I help my 3 and 5 year old fall asleep independently?
To answer these questions, Heather describes sleep support strategies that respect your baby’s need for safety and security, stage of development, and temperament.
Listen in to hear how the Loved to Sleep method can help you change how a 15 month old falls asleep, and what the Boomerang Method and Bridging to the Next Connection can do to support your preschooler’s sleep.
Mentioned in this episode:
Andrea Strang and Jen Verela's Loved to Sleep https://lovedtosleep.com/
Gordon Neufeld’s Roots of Attachment neufeldinstitute.org
Lyndsay Hookway's Holistic Sleep Coach lyndsayhookway.com
Do you have a question you want answered on the podcast?
Leave a text or voice note for Heather in Whatsapp at 905-749-8254 and I may use your question on a future episode.
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find links to the podcast at familysleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
Credits:🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Let’s talk about the 4-month sleep regression: what it is, what it’s not, and how to manage it.
In this episode, Heather Boyd, occupational therapist and sleep coach, explores what’s happening at the 4-month mark and how to move past the worry and fear about this stage of your baby’s development.
You’ll learn:
An alternative perspective on the entire idea of a 4-month sleep “regression
What’s happening in your baby’s brain and body at 4 months
Why sleep is sensitive at this stage
What makes this stage difficult for some babies
4 strategies for supporting your 4 month old baby
That if sleep is difficult, it doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong
Mentioned in this episode:
Parent Self-Care resource https://heatherboyd.vipmembervault.com/products/courses/view/1090681
Baby Sleep Mini Course (50% off in June 2025 with the code JUNEBUG): https://familysleep.ca/baby-sleep-course
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
If there was one theme in my practice in the past year, it was night weaning and how to do it with respect, reason, and responsiveness. So today’s episode is right on the mark.
My colleague and friend, Kim Hawley, IBCLC and Holistic Sleep Coach, shares perspectives and guidance on night feeding and weaning, and its relationship to sleep.
Kim Hawley, MA, MPH, IBCLC is a Holistic Sleep Coach, Lactation Consultant, Peaceful Parenting Educator, mom, and the host of The Responsive Family Sleep Podcast. She helps tired parents bring together developmental knowledge, sleep science, and their intuition to improve family sleep. Her specialty is holistic, responsive sleep support for babies, toddlers, and nursing families. Kim lives in Capitol Hill, Washington DC with her husband, 2 kids, guide dog, and cat. She loves running, listening to audio books, coffee, chocolate, and wine.
Listen for:
2 questions Kim wants parents to ask themselves when considering night weaning
What age may be easier to night wean (you might be surprised!)
What age tends not to be easy!
Feeding is more than calories
How the sensory system, nervous system regulation, and temperament play roles in night weaning
Perspectives on how much of a gamble to put on night weaning helping sleep
The fear Kim and I are seeing from parents about big feelings from your toddler
Setting loving limits
Kim’s favourite picture books about night weaning
Strategies for setting the stage for night weaning
Mentioned in this episode:
Research on the parent experience of weaning a toddler (covered in Heather’s blog, https://familysleep.ca/blog/nightweaning)
Where you can find Kim:
Website: https://intuitiveparentingdc.com/
The Responsive Family Sleep Podcast: https://intuitiveparentingdc.com/podcast
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/podcast
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at familysleep.ca/podcast
Stay tuned for a collaborative project Kim and I are working on!
Credits:🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Wondering if your newborn’s sleep is normal?
In this episode, Heather Boyd, occupational therapist and sleep coach, breaks down what to expect in the first few months of sleep development.
Listen in to hear:
What sleep looks like in the first few months
What movements, sounds, and behaviours you’ll see in your newborn when they are sleeping
What reflexes, breathing patterns, and movement patterns you’ll see from your newborn
When sleep cycles and consolidated night time sleep start to develop, and what you can do to help
The role that routines play in supporting your baby’s sleep
Your role in supporting newborn sleep
Mentioned in this episode:
Baby Tired Cues resource (and resources from other episodes) https://heatherboyd.vipmembervault.com/products/units/view/1654580/?lesson=2922858
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Heather explores the pressure she felt as a new mom to “measure up” and be “attachment-based enough”. This pressure to be good enough is a theme that comes up often in her one-on-one and sleep group work.
In this episode, Heather explores:
“Attachment Parenting” and the 7 B’s
Why checklist parenting undermines what is truly important to you (and what to focus on instead)
The freedom in knowing that not every moment is perfect
The questions parents ask about whether what they are doing is attachment-based enough or if what they are doing is actually sleep training
The value of knowing what’s most important to you so that decisions are easier
Looking ahead at where you want your parenting to steer your family
Appreciating that you are in a season of parenting right now that requires some compromise
Mentioned in this episode:
Scott Noelle Scott Noelle - Author & Life Coach
Dr. and Martha Sears, The Baby Book and the 7 B’s
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Baby wearing (carrying a baby on your body using a sling, wrap, or fabric carrier) is a popular and useful way of keeping baby close, and keeping a caregiver’s hands free.
In this episode, Heather talks with Jordan Morillo, maternal health occupational therapist, mom of one, and babywearing educator about the benefits and barriers to baby wearing. Jordan became inspired to start The Babywearing OT when she saw gaps in the perinatal care continuum after giving birth to her son.
Her evidence-based wisdom and passion for sharing information on the safety, merits, options and strategies for baby wearing leaves little doubt: babywearing is not a fad, but is a long-term helpful strategy that, with the right knowledge, can be done safely and easily.
When Jordan’s not working, you can find her caring for her plants, exploring local restaurants and boba tea shops, and spending afternoons on the couch, nap trapped.
Where to find Jordan:
Website: motherhoodtherapyservices.com
IG: motherhoodtherapyservices.com
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
In May, communities across Canada come together for Flora’s Walk to increase awareness of maternal mental health and raise funds for community agencies who support mothers in the perinatal period.
In this episode, Heather explores:
The statistics around prevalence of mental illness in mothers and fathers in the perinatal period
Common signs of Perinatal Mood & Anxiety Disorders
5 Strategies for supporting maternal mental health
The roles that sleep and community play in supporting maternal mental health
Don’t miss this important episode.
Mentioned in this episode:
Lifewithababy.com
Postnatal Support International postpartum.net
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
If you’re feeling frustrated or discouraged by your baby’s sleep, you’re not alone. There’s really no way to fully appreciate how exhausted you’ll be as a parent, even if you’ve been told you’re going to be tired and your baby will wake up often.
In this episode, Heather breaks down 3 shifts you can make so that your baby’s sleep is easier and less draining starting right now.
So often in our search for solutions to sleep problems, we focus on fixing what isn’t broken, and we struggle to shift our expectations around what we think our baby's sleep looks like. We also tend to latch onto what has worked for other families, instead of looking at what our unique babies need from us (and what we’re capable and willing to do).
The 3 tips in this episode won’t address underlying sleep disorders (that’s an episode of its own!). What it will do is give you a foundation for what you can shift TODAY so that you are losing less energy trying to make sleep look a certain way.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Infant Development Circle -get on the waitlist for September 2025 at www.familysleep.ca/infant-development-circle
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Download the Baby Sleep Connection Podcast Listener Guide at www.familysleep.ca/links
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits:
🎵 Music: Jordan Wood
Corrie Rose is a Kinder Musik educator in Niagara Ontario and studio owner of Kinder Musik with Miss Corrie. Music is a powerful and deeply engrained medium for learning, connection, and regulation. Kinder Musik is a specific program that uses instruments, stories, and movement activities to support early development.
In this episode we explore
The benefits of music for mental health, regulation, and connection
Corrie’s unexpected path from pharmacy assistant to struggling student, motherhood, and Kinder Musik educator
What to expect in a Kinder Musik class
How play and discovery are a part of the routine and rhythm of a Kinder Musik class
Music, emotions, and healing
Why being able to sing or play an instrument is NOT a prerequisite to using music to support your baby’s development
Where to find Miss Corrie:
Website: www.kindermusikwithmisscorrie.com
FB: https://www.facebook.com/KindermusikWithMissCorrie
IG: kindermusikwithmisscorrie
What you can do next:
Subscribe to this podcast and share it with a friend!
Don’t miss the next episode of The Baby Sleep Connection: Sign up for weekly baby sleep emails (which includes a heads up when a new podcast episode is released)
Work with Heather inside the Confident & Connected Baby Sleep group program or one-on-one.
Find previous episodes of the podcast at infantsleep.ca/podcast
Credits: 🎵 Music Credit: Jordan Wood