Marriage, Motherhood & the Messy Middle; What happens when the therapist gets real
Carrie Cohen
66 episodes
3 days ago
Sometimes life flips the script with a single call. Carrie gets candid about becoming a full-time caregiver overnight, canceling a dream trip, and learning to lead with nervous system wisdom instead of hustle. We explore how sudden shifts trigger fight, flight, and, if unmanaged, the slide into shutdown—and how to use simple, compassionate practices to climb back toward safety. This is practical, lived psychology: choosing the next true step, protecting capacity, and honoring the grief that c...
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Sometimes life flips the script with a single call. Carrie gets candid about becoming a full-time caregiver overnight, canceling a dream trip, and learning to lead with nervous system wisdom instead of hustle. We explore how sudden shifts trigger fight, flight, and, if unmanaged, the slide into shutdown—and how to use simple, compassionate practices to climb back toward safety. This is practical, lived psychology: choosing the next true step, protecting capacity, and honoring the grief that c...
Sometimes life flips the script with a single call. Carrie gets candid about becoming a full-time caregiver overnight, canceling a dream trip, and learning to lead with nervous system wisdom instead of hustle. We explore how sudden shifts trigger fight, flight, and, if unmanaged, the slide into shutdown—and how to use simple, compassionate practices to climb back toward safety. This is practical, lived psychology: choosing the next true step, protecting capacity, and honoring the grief that c...
Forget shared playlists and TV queues—the real glue in a lasting relationship is how your energies meet when life gets loud or painfully quiet. We pull back the curtain on compatibility and make a bold claim: what keeps couples close is the ability to co-regulate, repair quickly, and adapt your nervous systems to each other without losing yourself. We unpack the three core nervous system states—safety, fight or flight, and shutdown—and show how the same situation can play out completely diff...
What if the fastest way to become a better parent is to let go of guilt? I open up about the choices that shaped our family—moving a kindergartner mid-year, changing schools after COVID, and making the hardest leap from private to public when our teen asked for more room to breathe. Along the way, I share the framework that guided us: read the signals, honor your kid’s input, consult trusted voices, test the fit, then decide with intention. We explore “good enough parenting,” the Winnicott i...
The moments that change a family rarely arrive on schedule. One day you’re recording ideas for a new format; the next you’re in the ER at 8:30 p.m., texting updates while your husband drives your 85-year-old mom for an ultrasound. That’s where What Happens When The Therapist Gets Real begins at the intersection of caregiving, marriage, and a nervous system stretched thin. I share why I rebranded the show to make room for the messy middle and what happened when my body refused my long-standin...
You’ve been told that better communication is the key to a better marriage. But what if that’s not the real issue? If your nervous system doesn’t feel safe in love, no amount of deep talks, therapy sessions, or communication strategies will fix the disconnect. In this episode, I’m breaking down: 🔥 Why communication alone won’t fix your marriage (and what will) 🔥 How your nervous system reacts to love—with fight, flight, or freeze responses 🔥 Why your body may be blocking connection—even thoug...
You think you have a communication problem, but what’s really happening is that your nervous system is stuck in survival mode. In this episode, I’m breaking down: What survival mode in marriage actually meansHow to know if you’re in it (hint: it’s more than just feeling distant)The real reason intimacy, connection, and communication feel so hard right nowMost importantly—how to get out of it and feel safe in love againDoes this sound familiar? You snap at your husband over little things but k...
You love your husband. You know he’s a good man. But no matter how much effort you put in—communicating more, reading relationship books, trying to be more affectionate—you still feel disconnected. The problem isn’t communication. It’s your nervous system. In this episode, I break down The Nervous System Marriage Map™, a three-stage process that explains why your body may be stuck in survival mode and how to shift into a relationship that actually feels like home again. What You’ll Learn in T...
Have you ever felt like you and your partner are speaking completely different languages? In this special episode, I bring my husband, Steven Cohen, to unpack the fundamental differences in how men and women communicate—and why it so often leads to frustration, misinterpretation, or just plain silence. Together, we dive into: Why men tend to struggle with emotional expression and how their limited emotional vocabulary plays a role.How women’s broader range of words and emotions can sometimes ...
In this episode, I’m sharing why the key to strengthening your marriage starts with reconnecting to yourself. For so many women I work with, the journey back to love and connection begins with self-awareness, self-care, and reclaiming joy. If you’re feeling disconnected or overwhelmed, this episode will guide you through practical steps to get back to a place of clarity and connection. Here’s what we’ll explore: 🌟 How self-awareness helps you break unhealthy patterns and communicate more auth...
I’ve always been the go-to person at work—the one colleagues turn to for leadership and solutions. In my personal life, I’m the one who takes charge—planning events, managing big projects, and handling responsibilities with ease. I say yes, not because I’m a people-pleaser, but because I’m good at it. But when it comes to asking for help or showing vulnerability? I hesitate. Why is that? In this episode, I’m challenging the myth of the “Superwoman” who has to do it all alone. I’ll explore: Wh...
Are you putting your marriage on pause while raising your kids, waiting for the "perfect time" to reconnect with your partner? In this episode, we unpack why delaying the care and nurturing of your marriage might be more harmful than you think. Discover how prioritizing your relationship now—even amidst the chaos of parenting—can create a stronger, healthier bond that benefits your entire family. You'll walk away with practical tips to deepen your connection, foster emotional and physical int...
Are date nights, communication exercises, and scheduled intimacy leaving you feeling more disconnected than ever in your marriage? You’re not alone—and it’s not your fault. In this episode, I uncover why traditional marriage advice often backfires for strong, high-achieving women. We’ll dive deep into the real reasons you’re pulling away and why strategies like love languages and “just talk it out” miss the mark. Instead, I’ll show you what actually works to create lasting connection, startin...
On today's episode, I'm tackling a topic that hits close to home for so many of us, but one we rarely feel safe discussing: what happens when we don't feel attracted to our partner anymore? I'm diving deep into this uncomfortable truth that I've seen come up again and again in my work with couples. I'm sharing: Why that fluctuating attraction you're experiencing is completely normal (and why we need to stop letting Hollywood make us feel guilty about it)What I've discovered about the fascinat...
Is your need for perfection quietly destroying your relationship? In this eye-opening episode, I'm diving deep into the hidden connection between perfectionism, anxiety, and the health of your marriage. If you've ever felt exhausted trying to maintain the "perfect" relationship or found yourself constantly critiquing your partner (or yourself), this conversation is for you. Together, we'll explore: The surprising way perfectionism creates an anxiety cycle in relationships (and why trying hard...
In this powerful follow-up episode, I'm taking you on a deep dive into the root causes of relationship anxiety. Ever wondered why you push away the very love you're desperate to keep? Or why past relationships seem to haunt your present connections? This episode unravels these mysteries and more. I'll guide you through: The hidden impact of childhood experiences on your adult relationships (and why those patterns keep repeating)The fascinating world of attachment styles and how they secretly ...
Have you ever felt your heart race when your partner takes too long to text back? Or found yourself overthinking every little interaction in your relationship? I want you to know that you're not alone. In today's episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on relationship anxiety—a common yet rarely discussed challenge that I've seen affect countless couples. I'll be guiding you through: What relationship anxiety really looks like (beyond the obvious worry)The telltale signs you might be experienci...
Are you a driven, goal-oriented, Type A woman who's paired with a laid-back, go-with-the-flow Type B partner? If so, you're not alone! In this episode, I dive deep into the challenges of navigating a relationship where ambition meets relaxation—and how to make it work. As a Type A woman, you thrive on getting things done, staying on top of everything, and leading the charge. But when you're married to someone who moves at a different pace, frustration can build. You might find yourself naggin...
Hey there! In this episode, I'm diving deep into a topic that's close to my heart and probably yours too. Have you ever found yourself stuck in a loop of overthinking, analyzing your partner's every move, or feeling constantly on edge in your relationship? Trust me, I've been there, and I want to show you how our minds can become our own worst enemies in love. Here's what I'll be unpacking for you: I'll explain the hypervigilant mind and why your brain might be on high alert 24/7We'll explore...
In this episode, I’m getting real about the high cost of being a strong, independent woman in love. As a high-achieving woman myself, I know how it feels to take charge, handle everything, and wear that independence as a badge of honor. But here’s the thing: that fierce independence might be the very thing standing in the way of deeper connection. Why We Struggle to Let Love In Let’s face it—being successful and independent can sometimes create emotional walls that make it hard to let someone...
In this episode, I’m diving into something that can completely change how you understand emotional dynamics in your relationships—co-regulation. Ever felt a shift in mood between you and your partner and wondered what caused it? That’s your nervous systems communicating, and it plays a huge role in how we connect (or disconnect) emotionally. Co-regulation is the unconscious process where our nervous systems influence each other, creating a shared emotional experience. It can be as simple as a...
Marriage, Motherhood & the Messy Middle; What happens when the therapist gets real
Sometimes life flips the script with a single call. Carrie gets candid about becoming a full-time caregiver overnight, canceling a dream trip, and learning to lead with nervous system wisdom instead of hustle. We explore how sudden shifts trigger fight, flight, and, if unmanaged, the slide into shutdown—and how to use simple, compassionate practices to climb back toward safety. This is practical, lived psychology: choosing the next true step, protecting capacity, and honoring the grief that c...
