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Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
Drop the BS Podcast
110 episodes
4 months ago
Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the BS podcast is dedicated to inspiring you through those moments. In each episode, seasoned therapist Dr. Kirleen Neely will take you in session to learn the tools you need to drop your backstory and live your best today story.306221
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Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the BS podcast is dedicated to inspiring you through those moments. In each episode, seasoned therapist Dr. Kirleen Neely will take you in session to learn the tools you need to drop your backstory and live your best today story.306221
Show more...
Mental Health
Health & Fitness,
Medicine
Episodes (20/110)
Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
110: How to Decide If It’s Time to Move On
When It’s Time to Move On: Embracing Change

Letting go is one of the hardest things we face in life. Whether it’s walking away from a job, a relationship, a role we’ve outgrown, or even a dream that no longer aligns with who we are—it’s a process filled with emotional weight. Transitions stir up feelings of fear, anxiety, and uncertainty, and the unknown can make even necessary decisions feel paralyzing.At the same time, holding on for too long can keep us stuck. We risk sacrificing growth, peace, and opportunities for something better because we’re clinging to the comfort of what we already know. In this episode, I’ll guide you through:
  • Recognizing when it’s time to let go.
  • Overcoming the fears that make us hold on.
  • Embracing change as an opportunity for reflection and growth.
As this year—and this version of the podcast—comes to an end, it feels like the perfect time to discuss what it really means to let go and move forward. I’ll also take a moment to reflect on the journey of this podcast and share what’s next.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast. 
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10 months ago
21 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
109: When Stress Becomes Something More Serious
In this episode, I'll be sharing insights from both my personal experiences with burnout and my clinical expertise. Burnout is more than just feeling tired—it's a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that can become overwhelming if not addressed. I'll talk about how to identify when your exhaustion has crossed the line into burnout and offer strategies to recover before reaching the point of no return. This episode is perfect for anyone feeling drained by work, family, or life in general and unsure whether they're simply tired or experiencing full-blown burnout. Tune in for a blend of personal reflections and clinical advice on recognizing the signs and taking action.  

Key Takeaways: • 
  1. Recognizing the Signs: Take a Burnout Self-Assessment – Spend a few minutes to evaluate yourself honestly. Are you feeling persistently exhausted, detached, or cynical? Regular check-ins can help you catch burnout early by distinguishing these signs from everyday stress.
  2. Prioritizing Self-Care: Build a Deep Rest Routine – Schedule specific time each week for deeper forms of rest, such as nature walks, meditation, or mindful breathing. These practices can be more restorative than traditional self-care when burnout is at play.
  3. Work-Life Balance: Set Non-Negotiable Boundaries – Identify a couple of work boundaries, like not answering emails after 7 p.m. or committing one day of your weekend to recovery activities. Enforce these boundaries to reclaim balance and guard against burnout.
  4. Seeking Help: Reach Out for Support – Whether it’s a trusted friend, mentor, or mental health professional, talking through your experience can offer relief and insight. If burnout feels overwhelming, consider scheduling a therapy session to get personalized support.
  5. Different Domains of Burnout: Address Burnout Holistically – Try an activity that addresses each domain of burnout: emotionally, spend time journaling; physically, incorporate regular exercise or gentle stretching; occupationally, reassess your workload or ask for support on specific tasks to relieve pressure.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast. 
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12 months ago
31 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
108: Six Parenting Mistakes to Avoid
Parenting can often feel overwhelming, with many parents questioning their judgment and wondering if they're getting it right. A study by Psychology Today found that nearly 70% of parents frequently worry about whether they're making the right decisions. While there is no definitive parenting handbook, there are best practices that can help navigate the journey of raising children. 

In this episode of the podcast, drawing from my 25 years of experience working with thousands of couples, we dive into six common parenting mistakes that you should avoid. This isn't an exhaustive list but rather a guide to help you avoid some of the pitfalls that can complicate your relationship with your children.Whether you're a parent, an aunt, a grandparent, or someone who supports parents, these insights are designed to be practical and impactful.  

Key Takeaways:
  • Building Trust Over Authority: Avoid using power over your children. Build trust so they confide in you, giving you the chance to guide them effectively.
  • Avoiding Comparisons: Stop comparing your kids to their siblings or cousins. It breeds unhealthy competition and resentment.
  • Preparing for Reality: Shielding children from life's hardships doesn't prepare them for the real world. Show them how to navigate challenges without burdening them.
  • Balanced Parenting: Swinging to the opposite extreme of your own upbringing can create new issues. Aim for a balanced approach.
  • Listening First: Children need to feel heard. Instead of jumping to solutions, listen and validate their feelings first.
  • Supporting Growth: Avoid overreacting to current behaviors. Kids evolve and support their growth without fixating on the present.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast. 
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1 year ago
23 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
107: Like Who Likes You - Stop Chasing Dead-End Relationships
In today's episode, we dive into the heart of building healthier relationships by exploring the concept of "like who likes you." Many of us find ourselves chasing after unreciprocated affection or approval, often investing time and energy in relationships that don't truly value us. It's time to shift our focus to those who genuinely appreciate us and bring positivity into our lives. 

We'll break down the signs of a healthy relationship, such as mutual respect, shared decision-making, and the ability to be yourself without fear of judgment. Recognizing these signs can help you reassess your current connections and determine which ones are worth nurturing.We'll discuss practical strategies for letting go of relationships that don't uplift you and creating space for those that do.

If you're ready to stop chasing dead-end situations and start embracing connections that enhance your well-being, this episode offers the insights and steps you need. Learn how to transform your relationship dynamics and build a support network that truly values you. 

Key Takeaways
  • In a healthy relationship, you are accepted for who they are, fostering greater satisfaction and stability. 
  • A supportive relationship helps you grow and improve, encouraging self-development and new experiences.
  • Healthy relationships involve shared decision-making and influence, creating a balanced and fair dynamic.
  • Fundamental traits like reliability, kindness, and trustworthiness are essential for good relationships.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Up https://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
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1 year ago
26 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
106: Mindset Makeover: Take Control of Your Thoughts
In today's episode we are diving into the heart of mindset – a topic that touches every aspect of our lives. What exactly does mindset entail, and why does it matter so much for our mental well-being? Join us as we explore real-life stories and practical insights that shed light on the power of our thoughts and beliefs.Get ready to connect with the journey of a woman who experienced a profound shift in mindset.Through her story, we'll see firsthand how a negative mindset can hold us back and how a simple change in perspective can open doors to new possibilities.But this isn't just about theory – we're breaking down the science behind mindset in relatable terms. Discover how our brain chemistry influences our outlook on life, and learn practical strategies to rewire your thinking for the better. So, if you're feeling stuck or looking to improve your mental outlook, this episode is for you. Tune in for insights, inspiration, and actionable steps to take control of your thoughts and embrace a mindset that empowers you to thrive. 

Key Takeaways:
  1. Thought Choice and Belief Alignment: Your thoughts are powerful creators of your reality. Rather than passively accepting whatever thoughts come to mind, actively choose beliefs that align with your aspirations and values. Remember, you don't always get what you want, but rather what you deeply believe. This emphasizes the importance of consciously shaping your beliefs to manifest your desired outcomes.
  2. The Power of Neutrality: While positivity is often celebrated, maintaining a neutral perspective can be equally impactful. Striking a balance between optimism and realism, neutrality allows for clear-headed assessment and effective decision-making. By avoiding the extremes of overly optimistic or pessimistic thinking, you cultivate resilience and adaptability in navigating life's challenges.
  3. Mindset's Deep Impact on Brain Chemistry: The connection between mindset and brain chemistry runs deep, influencing your mental and emotional well-being in profound ways. Shifting your mindset can lead to tangible changes in neurotransmitter activity, such as increased serotonin and dopamine levels associated with feelings of happiness and motivation. By understanding this link, you unlock the potential for a cascade of positive benefits, from improved mood to enhanced cognitive function and overall psychological resilience.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Up https://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
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1 year ago
23 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
105: Fearless Living: Breaking Free from Fear and Phobias
In this episode focused on Fearless Living, we dive deep into the world of fear and phobias, exploring how they can impact our lives and hinder us from living to our fullest potential. Join us as we unravel real-life stories and practical strategies to overcome these challenges and reclaim control of our lives. From understanding the difference between everyday fears and debilitating phobias to offering support to loved ones, we cover it all.

Key Takeaway's
Understanding Fear vs. Phobia:
Fear is a natural response to perceived threats, while phobias are intense and irrational fears of specific objects or situations. Phobias can significantly disrupt daily life and may require professional intervention.

Recognizing the Signs:
Physical symptoms, avoidance behavior, panic attacks, distress, and anticipatory anxiety are common indicators of phobias. Recognizing these signs is crucial in seeking appropriate help and support.

Strategies for Overcoming Fear:
Gradual exposure, mindfulness techniques, and positive self-talk can help individuals confront and manage their fears effectively. Seeking professional help, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and exposure therapy, can facilitate long-term recovery.

Supporting Loved Ones:
Educate yourself about your loved one's phobia and offer empathetic support without judgment. Encourage them to seek professional help and accompany them if needed.

On-the-Couch Takeaways:
If fear is impacting your life, don't ignore it or shame yourself. Seek help and support. Gradually facing your fears and practicing relaxation techniques can empower you to overcome them.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Up https://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
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1 year ago
28 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
104: Backstory Triggers: How to Manage When Past Wounds Resurface
Ever found yourself suddenly overwhelmed by emotions from the past? It's like a tidal wave crashing into your present moment. In our latest episode, "Backstory Triggers," we dive deep into the powerful impact of unresolved experiences from the past resurfacing in your life. Learn why "If it's hysterical, it's probably historical." Understand the origins of exaggerated reactions and emotions by delving into unresolved experiences from the past. Explore how past traumas or unresolved issues influence present responses, shedding light on behavioral patterns and emotional triggers. Our guest expert licensed professional counselor, Roxanne Collins, drops so many nuggets of wisdom on this episode. Join us as we explore practical strategies to handle past wounds resurfacing in your life. Your backstory shapes your present, but it doesn't have to control your future.

Key Takeaways
  1. If it's hysterical, it's probably historical. Understand the origins of exaggerated reactions and emotions by delving into unresolved experiences from the past. Explore how past traumas or unresolved issues influence present responses, shedding light on behavioral patterns and emotional triggers.
  2. You have to ground yourself before you can elevate: Prioritize the psychological importance of grounding techniques in fostering self-awareness and emotional stability. Learn how techniques such as mindfulness and self-reflection can help slow down, center oneself, and process emotions effectively, laying the foundation for personal growth and resilience.
  3. You can show up for your old self as your new self: Navigate the journey of self-transformation by recognizing the tug-of-war between past habits and present aspirations. Explore strategies to confront and overcome old patterns of behavior, empowering your present self to make choices aligned with growth and authenticity.
Guest Bio
Roxanne Collins, is a dedicated Licensed Professional, is a beacon of support and transformation. With a Master's degree in School Counseling from The University of Texas at San Antonio, she has a deep understanding of the intricacies of human development, especially during the formative years of adolescence. Roxanne's journey began as an educator, where she witnessed firsthand that every student she encountered was crafting the early chapters of their life story, which would later shape their future. Her passion lies in assisting both adolescents and adults in rediscovering and rewriting the chapters of their life narratives, both past and present. Through a therapeutic lens, she helps individuals craft the chapters of their future, instilling hope and direction.Furthermore, Roxanne is committed to strengthening family bonds by empowering the unique identities of each family member. She firmly believes that each individual is the ultimate expert of their own life. To facilitate this process, Roxanne draws from a rich tapestry of therapeutic approaches, incorporating concepts from narrative therapy, person-centered theory, and cognitive behavior therapy. With empathy and insight, she illuminates the experiences and behaviors that have led individuals to their current state while offering guidance on making meaningful shifts to align their lives with their true selves and core values.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Roxanne Collins roxanne_collins_lpc (Instagram)
Master Class Sign Up https://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram

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1 year ago
28 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
103: Relationship Check: Chaser or Runner – Which One Are You?
Have you ever questioned your role in this dance of love, or observed your partner sending mixed signals? In this episode, we will delve into the intriguing dynamic of the "runner-chaser" phenomenon that many individuals find themselves in. The chaser typically takes on the role of initiator, pushing for the relationship and yearning for love and acknowledgment, while the runner adopts a more distant, commitment-phobic stance, alternating between hot and cold behaviors, often sending mixed signals. Our goal is to explore both perspectives, understanding how past experiences might contribute to these patterns of behavior.


Key Takeaways: Know Your Attachment Style:
  • Unearth the origins of your behavior by understanding attachment styles like anxious and insecure, rooted in childhood.

  • Explore how these attachment styles shape your role as either a chaser or a runner in relationships.

Pay Attention to Defense Mechanisms:
  • Spot the signs of defense mechanisms, including deflecting, constant blaming, or hot-and-cold behavior.

  • Decode these red flags to gain insights into whether your partner is currently in a chaser or runner phase, fostering a healthier connection.

Healthy Doesn't Mean Perfect:
  • Embrace the dance of a balanced relationship, where both partners take turns chasing and running.

  • Acknowledge that imperfections are a natural part of the journey and commit to working through ups and downs for a resilient and lasting connection.


Guest Bio- Erika Chavez Pena M.ED., LPC
Erika Chavez Pena dedicated 21 years to the public education system, serving as a teacher for the deaf and hard of hearing and as a high school counselor. Transitioning to the role of a Licensed Professional Counselor, she has been actively engaged in the counseling profession for the past 6 years. During her early career as an educator, Erika cultivated a passion for public speaking, delivering presentations for students, parents, and community members. More recently, she expanded her expertise by providing training for Neely Counseling Center's Employee Assistance Program. Her presentations focus on the psychological and emotional well-being of individuals, emphasizing the importance of balancing emotional, cognitive, social, and physical aspects. Currently, Erika provides counseling services to adolescents, adults, and couples at Neely Counseling Center.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Need Counseling neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/drkirleen/?hl=en

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
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1 year ago
26 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
102: Crushing Success Blocks: Overcoming Challenges This Year
🎙️ Ready to Crush Success Blocks? Join us in the latest episode of "Crushing Success Blocks" on the Drop the BS podcast, where we unpack strategies to overcome emotional hurdles and pave the way for triumph. From challenging emotional avoidance to detoxing catastrophizing, discover how to master your mindset for success.

Key Takeaways:

Emotional Intelligence Unleashed:
    • Challenge emotional avoidance by asking yourself, "PQ – What am I feeling?"
    • Name and acknowledge emotions like worry, anxiety, fear, uncertainty, and doubt.
    • Foster emotional awareness and resilience for personal growth.
Catastrophizing Detox:
    • Combat catastrophizing by seeking a balanced perspective.
    • Shift from jumping to conclusions to asking, "What is a more balanced way to look at this situation?"
    • Break the habit of letting worst-case scenarios dominate your thoughts.
Opinions: Yours vs. Others:
    • Examine whose opinion carries more weight – yours or others.
    • Break the cycle of constant self-comparison, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
    • Embrace your accomplishments without undermining them in comparison to others.
Listener Challenge:Challenge yourself this week to implement one strategy discussed in the episode to overcome emotional hurdles. Share your experiences using #CrushingSuccessBlocks.

Episode at a Glance
[2:16] A real story from the couch about breaking through success blocks
[14:00] Couch Time Takeaway's

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Need Counseling? Try Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/drkirleen/?hl=en
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1 year ago
23 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
101: Forgiving the Unforgettable: Navigating Family Wounds Around the Holidays
Welcome to season six on Drop the BS podcast, where we dive deep into the delicate threads of family dynamics. In today's episode, we unravel the powerful narrative of forgiveness and healing, especially when family wounds cast a shadow over the joyous holiday season.

Here's the episode at a glance:
[2:35] Stroy from the Couch
[08:16] On the Couch Takeaway

🎄 Episode Highlights:

Case Study: A Holiday Dilemma
  • We explore a poignant case where a wife grappled with the decision to visit her mother-in-law, given years of rudeness and disrespect. Join us as we delve into the complexities of this emotional journey.
Resolving Family Tensions
  • Discover how our featured couple navigated through their challenges, ultimately finding a path to resolution. Real and relatable, their story serves as a guiding light for those facing similar family struggles during the holidays.
Counselor's Couch Takeaways
  • Drawing from professional insights, we share actionable tips on how listeners can initiate healing conversations and work towards forgiveness. From setting boundaries to fostering open communication, these takeaways aim to empower you on your own journey.
🌈 Key Takeaways:
  • Setting Boundaries: Learn the art of setting healthy boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.
  • Open Communication: Explore the importance of transparent and empathetic communication, especially in the context of family dynamics.
  • Forgiveness: Understand the transformative power of forgiveness and how it can pave the way for healing, even in the most challenging family relationships.
Similar Episodes:
88: The First Holiday After a Loss

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
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1 year ago
15 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
100: Is It Time to Break Up with Your Bestie?
Breaking up with a best friend can feel just as painful as splitting up with your partner. And while everyone acknowledges the trauma of romantic breakups, people don’t really talk about the fallout of a platonic separation. But the truth is a breakup is a breakup. When you share intimacy, and trust, in a friendship making the decision to dissolve the relationship can be very difficult. So on today show I’ve brought on one of my besties Frank Baly to dish on this topic we’ve both had our ups and downs in friendship and I hope our perspectives helps you navigate the choppy water of breaking up with a bestie.

Similar Episodes:
87: Feeling Unheard and Unseen in Relationships?

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Frank Baly www.frankabaly.com
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
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2 years ago
44 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
99: Are You Using Love Languages Incorrectly? (Part 2)

In Episode 99, Pt. 2, we continue to unravel the Love Language Paradox: I dive into the dos and don'ts of how to effectively use love languages. You will leave this episode ready to love and live from a new perspective.

Similar Episodes
79: Should You Consider Couples Counseling? w/Dr. Kimberly VanBuren
57: Heal Relationship Disconnects w/Third Layer Conversations

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Love Language Test: https://5lovelanguages.com/
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
19 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
98: Are You Using Love Languages Incorrectly? (Part 1)
Odds are, you've heard of the five love five languages by now, and you may even have proclaimed out loud that your love language is physical touch, quality time, or one of the five. But in my work as a therapist, I find that people are missing the real magic behind what makes love languages a powerful concept and maybe misunderstand the original intent. Three decades ago, Gary Chapman, a 50-year-old Southern Baptist pastor with a doctorate in adult education, introduced the concept to the world with his seminal book, "The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts." In our two-part series, we are going to break down how to effectively utilize the five love languages to give and receive the love you deserve.

Similar Episodes
79: Should You Consider Couples Counseling? w/Dr. Kimberly VanBuren
57: Heal Relationship Disconnects w/Third Layer Conversations

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Love Language Test: https://5lovelanguages.com/
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
25 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
97: Self Help Tools: What to Do When You Can't Go to Therapy
If you know me, then you know that I am seriously a big fan of therapy. I might be a little biased as a therapist, but the truth is I am a big fan because I have seen firsthand the ability therapy has to transform lives. I have seen marriages saved, depression lifted, and teens get back on track with their life. However, I do understand that there may be a period in time when going to therapy is just not possible. Whether it is because of finances, time, or maybe you simply aren’t ready. So, on today’s show, I am going to share some simple self-help tools you can use in between therapy sessions.

Here's a glance at this episode:
[3:35] Disclaimer
[4:16] Tip #1: Journaling
[7:56] Prompt examples
[17:30] Tip #2: Work on disrupting your thoughts.
[19:10] Put your thoughts on trial.
[25:33] Toolbox Takeaway

Similar Episodes:
Episode 55: Dump the Inner Critic Episode
Episode 51: Are you considering therapy?

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
27 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
96: Is Your Loved One Struggling with Substance Abuse? w/Aaron Ballesteros
It's challenging to help a loved one struggling with any type of addiction. Sometimes direct, heart-to-heart conversation can lead to arguments, lies, and denial. Family and friends are often unsure of whether what they are dealing with is really an addiction or just misuse. The bottom line is seeing someone you love spiral into what you think is addiction is scary and can have emotional and psychological ramifications for everyone. In Episode 96, to help me explore this topic I’ve brough in Aaron Ballesteros, Licensed Professional Counselor. He has a passion for substance abuse work and shares some nuggets of wisdom on this episode. Substance abuse and substance misuse are often thought to be the same, but they have different meanings. Someone who delas with substance abuse means that they are intentionally using the drug in an unhealthy and illegal way. Whereas substance misuse is using or taking medicine in a way it was not intended to do so. According to the National Center for Drug Abuse Statistics (NCDAS), 21.4% of people who are 12 and over have used illegal drugs or misused prescription drugs within the last year. However, it was also discovered that the drug use among people aged 12 and over is down 0.4% year-over-year.

Similar Episodes: Episode 83: Should You Use Medication to Manage Your Mental Health? w/ Dr. Kim Episode 77: Stress Management 101

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts: Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Aaron Ballesteros https://www.instagram.com/counseloraaron/?hl=en
Aaron Ballesterso https://www.tiktok.com/@counseloraaron?lang=en
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
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2 years ago
40 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
95: Have You Been Accused of Being Too Controlling?
It is never easy when someone you know personally puts a label on you, like saying, “you’re so controlling.” Initially, you might think this person is just hating on you, but if you hear this from multiple people, you may begin to wonder if there is any truth to what they are saying.
Controlling behaviors can be incredibly detrimental to any relationship and may have deep emotional roots. In many instances, you may not realize that your actions come across as controlling. So, on today’s show, we will explore red flags that you may be a control freak and identify strategies to help you move through life with more ease and less control. Many times, being a control freak can create other issues within yourself, like increased anxiety or even severe self-criticism. It is important to be self-aware and recognize the signs before it is too late and you have damaged your relationship with others.

Here's a glance at this episode:
[2:50] Level Set: Are you controlling?
[5:20] What are the subtle ways you may be a control freak?
[17:28] Understanding why you are controlling
[21:30] What you can do about it?
[35:21] Toolbox Takeaway

Similar Episodes:
Episode 94: Hurt People Hurt People: How to Handle Passive Aggressive Individuals
Episode 91: Healing Childhood Trauma As An Adult w/ Maira Holzmann

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts: Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
37 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
94: Hurt People Hurt People: How to Handle Passive Aggressive Individuals
Do you have someone in your life that it's hard to have a simple conversation about what you feel or over a concern you may be having? Every time you try to explain what you feel, they take it the wrong way, won't accept responsibility for their actions, or just plain act out. When this happens, you may find yourself caught in the web of their dysfunctional communication style. Before you know it, you're upset, yelling, screaming, and wondering how in the heck did you get here. In many cases, these individuals are acting out of pain and trauma, and like the old saying goes, “hurt people, hurt people". When someone has experienced trauma or emotional pain, it can affect how they perceive and interact with the world around them and lead them to use defense mechanisms. A defense mechanism is an unconscious strategy that people use to protect themselves from anxious thoughts or feelings. On today's show, we're going to look at several common defense mechanisms that hurt people use. My hope is that getting the inside scoop on these behaviors will help you avoid the web of dysfunction and be able to approach difficult conversations with empathy and understanding.

Here's a glance at this episode:
[4:38 ] What is a defense mechanism?
[6:28 ] Top 3 Defense Mechanisms
[15:55] Toolbox Takeaway

Similar Episodes:Episode
53: Emotional Baggage Drop OffEpisode
80: Using Emotional Intelligence to Resolve Conflict and Keep YourCool w/ Doug Noll

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support morepeople -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better todaystory. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Writea Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about theepisode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Neely Counseling www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
18 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
93: “OMG, She Is So Bipolar!” Unpacking the truth about Bipolar Disorder w/Dr. James Fuqua
It has become commonplace for people to use mental health conditions as
dramatic labels for aspects of everyday life. Expressions like, "OMG, she's
so bipolar" and "I'm so OCD right now" have become a part of everyday
conversations. While most people are just trying to describe what they feel
at any given moment, this language may minimize the seriousness of these
conditions, create confusion, and leave people who truly struggle feeling unseen.
As mental health has taken center stage in recent years, it's time
to truly put some thought into the way we talk about our mental health.

So, on today's show, I've invited board-certified psychiatrist Dr. James
Fuqua to dive into the truth about Bipolar Disorder, its signs, and
treatment options available.


Here's a glance at this episode:
[4:24] What Is Bipolar Disorder?
[12:19] What Are The Causes?
[19:41] Toolbox Takeaway

Similar Episodes:
Episode 28: Do You Have Trouble Focusing? You Could Have Adult ADHD
Episode 31: Winning With the Cards You've Been Dealt

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more
people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today
story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write
a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the
episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Dr. James Fuqua's
www.ventanamentalhealth.com

Drop The BS Facebook Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
22 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
92: What to Do When You're Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
There are certain seasons in life where it may feel like there is no
solution to your problem. You've used every trick in the book, but the
relationship, situation, or circumstance just isn't changing. Maybe you've
been caring for a sick family member, or you are stuck in a dead relationship. You've cried, talked, prayed about it, and then talked about it again. These situations can leave us feeling overwhelmed, bitter, numb, and even exhausted despite getting a good night's sleep. On today's show, I'd like you to join me as I create space for us to discuss these complicated emotions and look for viable solutions to move throughthem.

Here's a glance at this episode:
[5:20] How Do We Move Through This Feeling?
[11:51] Grow, Keep, and Throw
[21:20] Toolbox Takeaway

Similar Episodes:
Episode 69: What Lesson Is Life Trying To Teach You?
Episode 73: Have You Been Easily Irritated Lately?

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more
people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today
story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write
a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the
episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Neely Counseling Center
Drop The BS Facebook Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Show more...
2 years ago
23 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
91: Healing Childhood Trauma As An Adult w/Maira Holzmann
I have heard countless people describe growing up in homes where they knew their parents cared about them, but many of the words, actions, and behaviors left them with wounds to deal with in adulthood. These wounds and traumas show up in adulthood in many ways, such as in patterns of settling for relationships that don't serve you, overthinking everything, and medicating emotions with food, alcohol, and even sex. And while most people try to suck it up and move on, the truth is what you do not deal with finds a way to sneak into how you feel physically, how you live, and how you love. So On today's show, we are going take a look at healing childhood trauma as an adult. And to help us unpack this topic, I've brought Maira Holzmann. She is a licensed therapist, and I think her approach to healing will definitely surprise you.

Similar Episodes:
Episode 42: Healing from an Unspeakable Experience
Episode 40: Dealing with Daddy Issues

Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more
people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today
story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write
a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the
episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Maira Holzmann LCSW
Counseling Services in Texas
Counseling Services outside of Texas
Drop The BS Facebook Group:
Show more...
2 years ago
39 minutes

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the BS podcast is dedicated to inspiring you through those moments. In each episode, seasoned therapist Dr. Kirleen Neely will take you in session to learn the tools you need to drop your backstory and live your best today story.306221