"What is real? How do you define 'real'? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain".
-Morpheus
That motherfucker was on to something! "Real" is only what you perceive it to be. In the end, all of us are full of shit, and simultaneously none of us are. Yeah, think about that while you're trying to pass that rough dry bowel movement you're currently trying to finish. You should have taken a real stool softener. And, while you're at it, soften up your attitude a little bit, and try not to be such a real cunt. I think we'll all benefit in the end.
Signed,
A real motherfucker
(According to Jenn)
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"What is real? How do you define 'real'? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain".
-Morpheus
That motherfucker was on to something! "Real" is only what you perceive it to be. In the end, all of us are full of shit, and simultaneously none of us are. Yeah, think about that while you're trying to pass that rough dry bowel movement you're currently trying to finish. You should have taken a real stool softener. And, while you're at it, soften up your attitude a little bit, and try not to be such a real cunt. I think we'll all benefit in the end.
Signed,
A real motherfucker
(According to Jenn)
"What is real? How do you define 'real'? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain".
-Morpheus
That motherfucker was on to something! "Real" is only what you perceive it to be. In the end, all of us are full of shit, and simultaneously none of us are. Yeah, think about that while you're trying to pass that rough dry bowel movement you're currently trying to finish. You should have taken a real stool softener. And, while you're at it, soften up your attitude a little bit, and try not to be such a real cunt. I think we'll all benefit in the end.
Signed,
A real motherfucker
(According to Jenn)
You know what, it's been a long week. That's what this episode was. So much anger, sadness, disappointment, and shame. But, Piggy is trying to get over all of that. Don't worry about her too much, she gets plenty of treats and pets. Anyway, life is being dealt with, you know how it fucking goes. Let's just try to keep it nice out there, huh? Most people suck, so try not to be like them.
Look ya'll, Jay might be drinking the kool-aid or something, because he's talking all kinds of crazy with this "Body count doesn't bother me anymore"
INSANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!
but incase this is the new norm WELCOME LADIES you might actually like the new "Devil May Care" Big Jay!!
Have you ever just gotten sick to the end of wanting to impress people with lies about you?
Are you ready to be who you are and let someone love you for the piece of shit human you are?
GREAT we can help you!
Call 1 1800-Get-Bent and for the low low price of $299.99 + travel and expenses *price subject to change on a whim*, Jay and I can come and give you a full assessment as to what's wrong with you and why the opposite sex won't touch your no-no square!
BUT if you don't the funds, just say so... GO ahead and listen to the episode and it's kinda like the same thing. But not really!
What's your views on Body counts? is it important? do they need to disclose the hole roster before hand?
Look, I'm not saying don't have a good time, all's I'm saying is be smart, be safe, and don't under any circumstances EVER EVA EVA EVA, Wait until you are married to take that brand new car out on the roads a few times.
Drive it. but put your seatbelt on!
I want you to listen to me and listen good.
Make Informed choices.
Think like you've got some fucking home training.
Don't be a twat, and stop talking to someone just because they don't like the same person you do.
most important. BE A GOOD FUCKING HUMAN TO ALL OTHER HUMANS.
GO TEAM
Do you ever think about the glitches you see? Do you think this is all a weird dream that we're having DeJa'Vu because we really have lived this life before!! and We're just the ripple in time that this scenario worked out, THIS TIME!
Ok listen my gummy went too hard, and I'm panicking and hit post too early. So HAPPY HALLOWEEN Kiddies!!! you get it a tiddy bit early!
If you haven't had someone tell you about toxic masculinity yet, give her about 30 seconds and she will tell you how, you walking on the street side to keep her away from traffic is toxic and she's a strong independent woman, she don't need no man!!
So Tina, you don't NEED a man, but I bet you'd be a whole lot more pleasant to be around if you got yourself a proper weenering, like I just did!
Have you ever been so close to letting that inner thought out? Well gather round kiddoes because Jay's going to tell you the moment he realized maybe he's been in the Heman woman haters club for a little too long!
The Diddler has been caught, and the jig is up! I always thought he was just some goofy dickhead. I had no idea he had become a full-fledged supervillain! I was about to say that I hope he's getting all the *BIFF*, *BANG*, *BOOM*, and *POW* on his butthole as payback, but he'd just be enjoying himself. Diddy has to go! Let's have the next white party as his funeral, just for funsies.
You know it's true! If a woman isn't feeling any "chemistry", "vibe", "spark", "butterflies", or whatever other malarkey they want to call it, then you're pretty much shit out of luck. But, whatever you do, do not forget that you should not get angry about somebody's preferences! If she's not feeling you, oh well. Pamela Handerson never turns you down, and she can't even see you. You live your life, let everybody else live their lives, and we can all just go about getting down the fucking road! Good? Good.
Have you ever been really rooting for someone in a movie to win in the end because the whole time they were just getting ragdolled by life over and over again, only to find out they turn out just like the bad guy.
Yeah thats how this movie left me feeling.
Take a listen and see if you agree, or if you didn't see any undertones.
Have you ever asked yourself "What would you do?" Because if you haven't you're most likley not the kind of person this episode will reach anyway!
so listen, or don't but feel free to reach out to someone and be kind today for no reason!
Have you ever just wondered what your pets are thinking about? Like have you given them the best life? is the only thing they get huffy about is when the next treat is showing up for playing they humans stupid little games?!?!?
If so, congrats you have a one up on those asshole human parents. and if that's not enough I'm running for president in 2028 because by the old Gods and the New I can't be worse than our current options!
So as my one of my fave TikTokers LilchOmp says "Labia's and genitals, Strap in and Strap on"
You may have your finger on the pulse of society, but society has it's boot on your neck, and it's fingers in every single pie you've got. Do you ever feel like you're being watched? You are. Not by somebody in person, unless you're just lucky like that. But, there are multitudes of people who could each give an accurate account of every single move you've made in a day, and you've never met any of them. A statement like that would have been conspiracy theory territory less than 10 years ago. Now, it's just common knowledge, and everybody just seems A-okay with the shit! Oh well, enjoy the electronic cuffs everybody!! Big Brother can suck a big old fat one.
The "Happy Games", huh? I can tell you, a lot more people would probably be happier with them if there were less kiddie diddlers, and less domestic abuse between men and women in a "competitive" boxing ring. The open ceremony was strange, but I didn't really care about it other than the ballbag that was less than 3 feet away from a child's face. More than just a little bit of a problem there, just my two cents. Oh well, it is a nice change of pace to be openly patriotic for the USA, without being accused of being a far-right sexist homophobic racist awful, awful man. So, yay! Live it up, everybody. We'll be back to regularly scheduled bullshit in less than 2 weeks.
Have you ever just gotten so sick of putting on the whole face every day? or wearing the push up bra. or wearing the shoes to make your butt look better? because dudes don't care. I promise if you show up to his house in some shorts and one of his Tshirts telling him you just wanna lay on the sofa and watch survivor he's gonna be stoked!!! We need to stop setting our selves up to hurt our own feels.
Also don't listen to broads who are willing to sell their kids to follow criminals. Things you never thought youd have to tell actual adults.
Listen I don't think I could F*ck up the country any more than it already is, BUT I'd like the chance to try! Honestly I'd vote for that crazy dude on TikTok that's always saying "Cuz I'm runnin for shit" at least he's got cute dogs lol.
Go outside do something nice for the world WITHOUT FILMING IT you selfish thundertwonks.
"And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: 'We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive!' Today we celebrate our Independence Day!"- Bill Pullman Independance Day Movie
Happy 4th of July from everyone here at J&J's We hope even if you aren't from here you know, we still don't like ya'll, and America is still only as cool as Texas allows it to be!
Have you ever wanted to go back in time and find that moment where you looked at the opposite sex a little more critically?
Because I remember that moment it happened to me. The moment I started to see males a little less shiny. I should have listened to my inner self, my 6 year old self was way smarter than almost 40 me!
"What is real? How do you define 'real'? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain".
-Morpheus
That motherfucker was on to something! "Real" is only what you perceive it to be. In the end, all of us are full of shit, and simultaneously none of us are. Yeah, think about that while you're trying to pass that rough dry bowel movement you're currently trying to finish. You should have taken a real stool softener. And, while you're at it, soften up your attitude a little bit, and try not to be such a real cunt. I think we'll all benefit in the end.
Signed,
A real motherfucker
(According to Jenn)
