“Can narcissists or psychopaths ever live moral lives?” This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener who asks: “Do you think there are some narcissists or psychopaths who genuinely try to live moral lives—perhaps guided by religion or conscience—or are they all just pretending?” Her question was prompted by years of watching her ex, a man she believes to be a malignant narcissist, play the part of a “righteous” and religious man in public while being manipulative and cruel in private. ...

Ever wonder why you keep attracting the same kind of person—the ones who feel magnetic at first but end up draining you emotionally? This week, therapist and author Jessica Baum, creator of Anxiously Attached and SAFE: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building Secure Relationships, joins Dr. Kerry to explore the hidden attachment wounds that pull us toward toxic partners. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcas...

“How can someone seem loving for years—then suddenly turn cruel?” This week’s Fan Mail revisits a letter that struck a nerve with listeners. A woman wrote about her daughter-in-law, who had seemed like a wonderful addition to the family for seven years—until she “suddenly turned into a monster.” But after the episode aired, Dr. Kerry received another listener’s response who offered the opposite perspective: “I was in a 23-year marriage marked by coercive control and escalating abuse. My in-la...

Ever feel blindsided by someone who seemed charming, helpful, or even caring—only to realize later they were quietly dismantling your peace? This week, conflict expert Bill Eddy, author of The Five Types of People That Ruin Your Life, joins Dr. Kerry to unpack the five high-conflict personality types most likely to cause chaos in relationships, workplaces, and families. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcast...

“Why does my ex always blame me when the kids want nothing to do with him?” This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Rochester, New York, who writes about the heartbreak of watching her children pull away from their abusive father, only to be blamed for it. Her ex insists she’s turned the kids against him, while his family defends him as “such a good man” who’s “done so much for us.” In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains how emotionally immature and abusive individuals deflect accountabili...

Ever feel like your relationship was the most intoxicating connection of your life—only to discover shocking lies and betrayal later? This week, intimacy expert Gary Katz reveals how narcissists protect themselves by keeping secrets, building false connections, and manipulating trust—and why survivors are often left questioning their own instincts. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcast Extra Interview 🔹 Think you...

What do you do when the evidence points to betrayal, but your partner insists you’re crazy? This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Atlanta, Georgia, who describes the heartbreak of suspecting her husband of nearly 50 years is living a double life. Despite finding suspicious phone activity and even an STD clinic reference, her husband denies everything—blaming and belittling her instead. In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks the signs of DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender), e...

Predators are often hiding in plain sight—and even the smartest, most capable people can miss the red flags. In this episode, Dr. Kerry McAvoy talks with Sarma Melngailis, the former restaurateur whose story was told in Netflix’s Bad Vegan. Sarma opens up about how she was manipulated, criminalized, and misrepresented—and why her memoir The Girl with the Duck Tattoo finally tells the truth. Together, Kerry and Sarma unpack why predators are so difficult to spot, how they exploit our bes...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! This week’s Fan Mail brings us two powerful questions: • From Syracuse, New York: “The family referee took my custody and handed it over to the father who was absent for years. My children have been separated from their siblings, and I’m only allowed one hour a week of visitation. The court won’t let me present my evidence, and I feel silenced and helpless. What can I do?” From Wichita, KansasAnd from Kansas C...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Join Dr. Kerry McAvoy on Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse for real talk about toxic relationships and recovery. Mondays feature expert interviews, Thursdays bring our new Fan Mail Q&A. Get clarity, validation, and tools to heal. Stay in Touch with Dr. Kerry! YoutubeInstagramTikTokFacebookMore About Dr. Kerry Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist and author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationsh...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Disclaimer: This interview features perspectives from a male divorce coach navigating toxic dynamics. While some views expressed differ from those of trauma-informed psychology, I found it valuable to explore these tensions in real time. Please listen with care, and note that I challenge certain assumptions as we go. This week, I sit down with Josh Tomeoni, a divorce coach who shares his story of what he describes a...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! What happens when a narcissistic therapist uses their professional training against you? This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener in Seattle who writes: “I dated a narcissist who was also a licensed clinical social worker. Can you talk about the weaponization of therapeutic training by narcissists?” In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks how narcissistic mental health professions can use psychology to pathologize y...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Do you know what one of the most dangerous traps you can fall for? Believing that you can “fix” a narcissist’s early attachment wounds. In this exclusive episode, therapist and author Chelli Pumphrey explains why narcissists rarely have secure attachments, how anxious or disorganized patterns drive their constant need for supply, and why survivors’ empathy often backfires when met with exploitation. PODCAST EXTRA EX...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Can you really heal a trauma bond—or is the damage permanent? This week’s Fan Mail features two powerful questions. The first comes from a YouTube listener who asks: “Is it really possible to break a trauma bond? Even Dr. Ramani says she still struggles daily—so what’s the point of fighting, especially if kids are involved?” The second comes from a listener in New York, New York who wants to know: “Why do narciss...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Can you ever be “good enough” for a difficult mother? In this episode, psychotherapist Katherine Fabrizio, author of The Good Daughter Syndrome, reveals why empathic daughters feel trapped in cycles of guilt, exhaustion, and approval-seeking—and how to finally reclaim your power and identity. Tronick’s Still (Blank) Face Experiment PODCAST EXTRA EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW Find it here: https://substack.com/@breaki...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! This week’s fan mail dives into two powerful questions about surviving emotional abuse. First, Dr. Kerry explores what it means when you stop crying—and why emotional shutdown can be a survival mechanism in toxic relationships. Then she tackles whether the sunk cost fallacy is really what keeps us stuck with a narcissist, or if something deeper is at play. Submit Your Question! If you would like your question addressed on ai...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Going through a custody battle or divorce with a narcissist? The you know the legal system can feel stacked against you. This week, former family law judge and attorney Michele Locke reveals exactly how narcissists twist the truth, exploit legal loopholes, and weaponize the court process — and what you can do to outsmart them. Whether you’re divorcing a narcissist, navigating parental alienation, or preparing for a high-conf...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! What do you do when you can’t just cut off a toxic person? This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a YouTube listener who asks: “How do I stop the cognitive dissonance and self-doubt when I can’t go no-contact with a toxic person?” In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains why cognitive dissonance is such a powerful trap in emotionally abusive relationships—especially when you’re forced to maintain contact. Submit Your Question I...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Why do so many survivors miss they’re being abuse? In this Labor Day Special, I’m revisiting three powerful interviews that follow the journey from denial to freedom. First, we explore how abuse often hides in plain sight, even for smart, capable people. Then, we examine how cognitive dissonance keeps you stuck. Finally, we describe what late-stage cognitive dissonance sounds and feels like—when you barely recognize yourself...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Is my daughter-in-law a malignant narcissist? How did she hide her worst qualities for so long? Today, Dr. Kerry answers 2 listeners’ questions. The first is from New York, New York about narcissists’ public and private personas. Many narcissistic individuals create a false mask to hide their worst qualities. The second comes from Southern Pines, North Carolina, who wants to know more about love-bombing. SU...