Ever feel like you’re slowly running out of air in a “nice” relationship? This week, Eleni Sagredos joins Dr. Kerry to unpack how coercive control hides behind charm and “preferences,” and why it’s so hard to spot until your autonomy has been chipped away. We trace the subtle dynamics that slowly worsen an abusive power imbalance. PODCAST EXTRA EXCLUSIVE SEGMENT Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. MORE ABOUT THE PODCAST EXTRA INTERVIEW 🔹 From subtle contr...

“My son’s in a toxic marriage—how do we help without making it worse?” This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener in Raleigh, North Carolina: “My adult son is in a toxic marriage with a likely narcissist. He’s miserable, says he wants out, but stays—partly because of their three young kids. How can we support him when he shares the emotional abuse without pushing or making things worse?” In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains how best to support a loved one who’s being abused—especially...

Ever feel like you can’t find “you” anymore? That you’re second-guessing everything, going numb, or swallowing your words just to keep the peace? This week, psychologist Dr. Shahrzad Jalali joins Dr. Kerry to unpack how long-term emotional abuse scrambles your nervous system, erodes self-trust, and leads to identity confusion—and what actually helps you get “you” back. We trace the early red flags, why we repeat familiar patterns, and the body-level toll (sleep, gut, jaw, hypervigilance) that...

“My abuser claims he’s ‘trauma bonded’ to me…Can that be true? This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener on YouTube who wants to know how common it is for an abusive partner to be trauma bonded. Hers claims to be. She’s wonders if this true or if her partner is attempting to dodge responsibility. Submit Your Question If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here: 👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail Stay in Touch With Dr. Kerry! YoutubeInstagramTikT...

Has your adult child gone no contact? Cut off all communication with you? Are you struggling to figure out how to repair things with them? There’s an alarming trend of adult children walking away from family connections called parental estrangement. Why is going no contact becoming the go-to way of handling strained relationships? And what can you do if it happens to you? This week, psychologist and author Dr. Joshua Coleman, author of Rules of Estrangement, joins Dr. Kerry to unpack why estr...

“Can narcissists or psychopaths ever live moral lives?” This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener who asks: “Do you think there are some narcissists or psychopaths who genuinely try to live moral lives—perhaps guided by religion or conscience—or are they all just pretending?” Her question was prompted by years of watching her ex, a man she believes to be a malignant narcissist, play the part of a “righteous” and religious man in public while being manipulative and cruel in private. ...

Ever wonder why you keep attracting the same kind of person—the ones who feel magnetic at first but end up draining you emotionally? This week, therapist and author Jessica Baum, creator of Anxiously Attached and SAFE: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building Secure Relationships, joins Dr. Kerry to explore the hidden attachment wounds that pull us toward toxic partners. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcas...

“How can someone seem loving for years—then suddenly turn cruel?” This week’s Fan Mail revisits a letter that struck a nerve with listeners. A woman wrote about her daughter-in-law, who had seemed like a wonderful addition to the family for seven years—until she “suddenly turned into a monster.” But after the episode aired, Dr. Kerry received another listener’s response who offered the opposite perspective: “I was in a 23-year marriage marked by coercive control and escalating abuse. My in-la...

Ever feel blindsided by someone who seemed charming, helpful, or even caring—only to realize later they were quietly dismantling your peace? This week, conflict expert Bill Eddy, author of The Five Types of People That Ruin Your Life, joins Dr. Kerry to unpack the five high-conflict personality types most likely to cause chaos in relationships, workplaces, and families. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcast...

“Why does my ex always blame me when the kids want nothing to do with him?” This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Rochester, New York, who writes about the heartbreak of watching her children pull away from their abusive father, only to be blamed for it. Her ex insists she’s turned the kids against him, while his family defends him as “such a good man” who’s “done so much for us.” In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains how emotionally immature and abusive individuals deflect accountabili...

Ever feel like your relationship was the most intoxicating connection of your life—only to discover shocking lies and betrayal later? This week, intimacy expert Gary Katz reveals how narcissists protect themselves by keeping secrets, building false connections, and manipulating trust—and why survivors are often left questioning their own instincts. Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here. More About the Podcast Extra Interview 🔹 Think you...

What do you do when the evidence points to betrayal, but your partner insists you’re crazy? This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Atlanta, Georgia, who describes the heartbreak of suspecting her husband of nearly 50 years is living a double life. Despite finding suspicious phone activity and even an STD clinic reference, her husband denies everything—blaming and belittling her instead. In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks the signs of DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender), e...

Predators are often hiding in plain sight—and even the smartest, most capable people can miss the red flags. In this episode, Dr. Kerry McAvoy talks with Sarma Melngailis, the former restaurateur whose story was told in Netflix’s Bad Vegan. Sarma opens up about how she was manipulated, criminalized, and misrepresented—and why her memoir The Girl with the Duck Tattoo finally tells the truth. Together, Kerry and Sarma unpack why predators are so difficult to spot, how they exploit our bes...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! This week’s Fan Mail brings us two powerful questions: • From Syracuse, New York: “The family referee took my custody and handed it over to the father who was absent for years. My children have been separated from their siblings, and I’m only allowed one hour a week of visitation. The court won’t let me present my evidence, and I feel silenced and helpless. What can I do?” From Wichita, KansasAnd from Kansas C...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Join Dr. Kerry McAvoy on Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse for real talk about toxic relationships and recovery. Mondays feature expert interviews, Thursdays bring our new Fan Mail Q&A. Get clarity, validation, and tools to heal. Stay in Touch with Dr. Kerry! YoutubeInstagramTikTokFacebookMore About Dr. Kerry Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist and author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationsh...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Disclaimer: This interview features perspectives from a male divorce coach navigating toxic dynamics. While some views expressed differ from those of trauma-informed psychology, I found it valuable to explore these tensions in real time. Please listen with care, and note that I challenge certain assumptions as we go. This week, I sit down with Josh Tomeoni, a divorce coach who shares his story of what he describes a...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! What happens when a narcissistic therapist uses their professional training against you? This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener in Seattle who writes: “I dated a narcissist who was also a licensed clinical social worker. Can you talk about the weaponization of therapeutic training by narcissists?” In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks how narcissistic mental health professions can use psychology to pathologize y...

Submit your question to be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Do you know what one of the most dangerous traps you can fall for? Believing that you can “fix” a narcissist’s early attachment wounds. In this exclusive episode, therapist and author Chelli Pumphrey explains why narcissists rarely have secure attachments, how anxious or disorganized patterns drive their constant need for supply, and why survivors’ empathy often backfires when met with exploitation. PODCAST EXTRA EX...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Can you really heal a trauma bond—or is the damage permanent? This week’s Fan Mail features two powerful questions. The first comes from a YouTube listener who asks: “Is it really possible to break a trauma bond? Even Dr. Ramani says she still struggles daily—so what’s the point of fighting, especially if kids are involved?” The second comes from a listener in New York, New York who wants to know: “Why do narciss...

Submit your question be answered on air to the Fan Mail link below! Can you ever be “good enough” for a difficult mother? In this episode, psychotherapist Katherine Fabrizio, author of The Good Daughter Syndrome, reveals why empathic daughters feel trapped in cycles of guilt, exhaustion, and approval-seeking—and how to finally reclaim your power and identity. Tronick’s Still (Blank) Face Experiment PODCAST EXTRA EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW Find it here: https://substack.com/@breaki...