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We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
Real Talk: Unfiltered
11 episodes
6 days ago
Real Talk: Unfiltered What does “resilience” really mean? For years, I thought it meant “pushing through.” Then a traumatic brain injury (TBI) shattered my old self and taught me that true strength is found in grace, not grit. This is my story of: Losing my voice literally: I called Portobello ("mushrooms-goblin-pasta”). Almost missing my son’s birthday… and the hug that saved me. Rebelling against doctors who said I’d “never recover past 70%.” Flying to India broken and finding peace in breath-work, yoga, and silence. Learning what healing really means
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Real Talk: Unfiltered What does “resilience” really mean? For years, I thought it meant “pushing through.” Then a traumatic brain injury (TBI) shattered my old self and taught me that true strength is found in grace, not grit. This is my story of: Losing my voice literally: I called Portobello ("mushrooms-goblin-pasta”). Almost missing my son’s birthday… and the hug that saved me. Rebelling against doctors who said I’d “never recover past 70%.” Flying to India broken and finding peace in breath-work, yoga, and silence. Learning what healing really means
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Personal Journals
Society & Culture
Episodes (11/11)
We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: The Body Keeps the Score - Finding Myself Through "Trauma Sensitive Yoga"

My Newest Story About TCTSY.


📌Timestamps:

00:00 - Opening & Setting the Stage

  • We Need To Talk: important and hopeful episode
  • Raw honesty about the TBI journey


01:50 - The Broken Reality After TBI

  • Living in body that wasn't mine
  • 12cm skull crack, brain bleed, 20 minutes non-responsive
  • Waking up not as myself, a scared stranger


03:50 - The Male Response: Power Through

  • Building walls, shutting down, dealing alone
  • You can't bully a nervous system into healing
  • Deeper knowing “you need something different"


05:55 - Introduction to TCTSY

  • Trauma Center Trauma-Sensitive Yoga explained
  • Scientific clinical lifeline, not woo-woo
  • Finally coming home to myself


07:02 - The Science Behind Healing

  • How movement rewires traumatised brains
  • Neuroception & Interoception concepts


08:18 - Understanding Neuroception

  • Dr. Porges and Polyvagal Theory
  • Nervous system's security scanner
  • My TBI threw my whole system out of whack


10:30 - When Everything Becomes Threat

  • Living in constant alert for year after accident
  • Supermarkets too loud, restaurants overwhelming

11:38 - Dr. van der Kolk's Breakthrough

  • “The Body Keeps the Score" impact
  • Partnership with Yogi David Emerson
  • Language older than words


14:30 - The Deeper Intelligence

  • Wisdom beyond ancient survival parts
  • Intelligence that doesn't get trauma-damaged


15:26 - What Makes TCTSY Different

  • Not about perfect poses
  • Working with your neuroceptive system

16:21 - Three Pillars of Safety

  • No physical adjustments
  • Invitational language


18:03 - Revolutionary Power of Choice

  • Choices violently taken in accidents
  • Getting keys to your own house back
  • No right way


20:01 - Understanding Interoception

  • Feel what's happening inside your body
  • How trauma shatters this connection


22:10 - The Guided Tour Home

  • Practice in interoceptive awareness
  • Coming back to your skin safely


23:50 - The Witness Consciousness

  • Finding the part that watches the storm without being it
  • Building new neural pathways


25:40 - Invitation to Experience

  • Optional “Guided practice” 
  • Complete control over experience


27:30 - Noticing Support

  • Notising contact points with support
  • The quiet observer always there


30:01 - Breath Awareness

  • Not changing the breath, just noticing
  • Body knowing how to breathe

31:31 - Making Conscious Choice

  • Movement options
  • No right or wrong choices


32:42 - Exploring Internal Experience

  • Noticing what happens during movement
  • That deeper knowing, without thinking


34:30 - Integration and Return to the Now

  • You just practiced: Introception, Agency, Present moment experiences.


37:32 - My Journey Back Home

  • From passenger to driver again
  • Arms-above-head triggering experience


39:00 - Accessing Wisdom Beyond Logic

  • Simple act revealing deeper intelligence
  • Building trust week by week


41:41 - The Deeper Teaching

  • Not my thoughts, pain, rage, anxiety
  • Weather patterns passing through


43:30 - From Healing to Helping

  • Recovery is meant to be shared
  • Becoming certified TCTSY facilitator


45:10 - Stories of Transformation

  • Veterans learning stillness
  • Survivors discovering hidden strength
  • Offering Choice and Safety


48:15 - The Evolving Science

  • Growing research backing practices
  • Literal brain structure changes

50:50 - Beyond "Big T" Trauma

  • Cutting-edge neuroscience with ancient wisdom
  • We all need this work


52:02 - Message to Listeners

  • My recovery isn't over, still managing daily
  • No longer stranger in own life


54:08 - Your Body Is Not Enemy

  • Hypervigilance as protection
  • Work is to listen and befriend it


55:47 - You Don't Have to Do This Alone

  • People who understand
  • Facilitators trained in trauma-sensitive approaches


56:33 - My Promise to You

  • 12cm crack, massive brain bleed, lost so long
  • If I found way back, so can you
  • Your story matters because YOU matter


57:26 - Almost Closing Gratitude

  • Thank you for courage to keep going
  • Trust your body knows the way home


58:26 - The Buddhi Revelation

  • Deeper wisdom mentioned 11 times
  • Promise to explain ancient wisdom next episode


60:00 - End

  • Please Dance in the Rain like nobody watching
Show more...
1 month ago
1 hour 30 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: Ego & The Gap Between Knowing and Doing

📌Timestamps: - Ego & The Gap Between Knowing & Doing





00:00 - Introduction & Setting the Stage

  • Opening thoughts on Ego - The Gap between Knowing & Doing 


01:30 - The Two Conversations

  • Conversation with Swami Anand Swatantra “ Ego”
  • Hart-to-Heart talks with Alice about vulnerability & trauma
  • What triggered me to make this episode


02:37 - My TBI Survivor's Unique Perspective

  • Learning everything twice: before and after injury
  • How trauma changes the relationship between knowing and doing
  • The universe as my patient teacher


04:41 - Before the Injury: The Control Illusion

  • Believing I could work and think through everything
  • The analytical approach to life
  • How trauma stripped away these illusions


05:43 - Doing Mind vs. Thinking Mind

  • Accessing different parts of my consciousness
  • Introduction to Buddhi - Intuitive intelligence
  • How my Thinking mind demands guarantees vs my Doing mind learns through action


06:55 - Relearning Trust in my Doing Mind

  • Post-injury experiences with body memory
  • When hands remember what the mind forgot
  • The Intelligence that exists beyond analytical mind


08:08 - Ego's Temporal Prison

  • Eckhart Tolle's teaching on ego and the present moment
  • Ego's past and future
  • Personal experience rebuilding sense of self
  • Trapped between regret and anxiety


10:08 - Practice of my Presence Ritual

  • Karma yoga “The path of selfless action”
  • Relearning basic functions after my TBI
  • What problem exists in the Now


12:08 - TBI Teaching: When Survival Becomes an Awakening

  • The messy reality of Trauma recovery
  • Two years on the couch as my safety zone
  • Gabor Maté's teaching on Ego preferring familiar pain over growth


14:36 - The Moment of Realisation

  • Difference between Thinking, Trying, and Doing
  • The Magic of instant feedback
  • Why “Trying" to me means setting myself up to Fail


16:36 - My Daily Practice of Defiance

  • Standing up to my ego-mind
  • Action over Analysing
  • My 60-minute journey to the fence
  • Breaking down the timeline of recovery


18:38 - Two States: Doing and Not Doing

  • Eliminating "trying" as middle ground
  • "I did it, just didn't succeed this time"
  • The Action of doing itself is Success, regardless the outcome


19:43 - When Soul Gets Edged Out

  • Deepak Chopra and “Edging God Out"
  • Post-injury disconnection from self
  • Waking up in a stranger’s life and body
  • Feeling like a ghost in my own existence


22:28 - Being Erased from the Self

  • How Ego edged Me out
  • Reconnection to the self and the Universe
  • You are NOT your thoughts


24:10 - The Space Between Stimulus and Response

  • Rebuilding the pause that trauma collapses
  • The Trauma Sensitive Yoga training insights
  • Creating conditions for choice to emerge


26:14 - Trauma Sensitive Yoga’s Invitation

  • Inviting Awareness through the Body
  • The Radical possibility of choice
  • The space where agency lives
  • Relearning the sensations of the body


28:15 - What my Brain Injury and Old Trauma Stole from me 

  • I am NOT My Reactions, I am NOT My Pain
  • It’s My Choice of what comes Next
  • The space where healing lives


30:17 - My Truth about Trusting my Doing Mind

  • Emotions still gets scrambled
  • Practice of stepping back from all the confusion
  • It’s Not about Control over the Mind
  • The Ego Voice wants to keep you Small


33:57 - The Real Question about Knowing & Doing

  • Are You willing to do the Next Right Thing?
  • Staying Awake and Aware to Receive Answers 
  • Invitation to take Action from a place of NOT Knowing
  • Be willing to start taking the next step


36:06 - Three Perspectives on Ego

  • Tolle's: Dysfunctional relationship with present
  • Chopra's: E.G.O. as Edging God Out
  • Maté's: Trauma Informed protective mechanism of Ego


38:14 - Closing Wisdom

  • The When of Tolle, The What of Chopra andThe Why of Maté
  • The Beauty of Rebuilding  my sense of self 
  • Ego is not my enemy anymore


40:59 - Namaste & Sign-off

  • Short answer to the question from Alice!
  • Keep dancing in the rain like nobody is watching


Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional

These are all my experience as I live with my TBI




Show more...
2 months ago
41 minutes 35 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: The Connection Between Pain, Focus, and Breath (How One Broken System Nearly Destroyed Me)

📌 TIMESTAMPS


Real Talk Unfiltered


00:00 - Introduction: The Connected Crisis

We need to talk about pain, focus, and breath, and how discovering they're the same problem with the same solution changed everything


01:07 - The Questions That Changed My Perspective

How do I handle pain with breath work. How do I keep focus with sensory overload? These seemed like different problems I was wrong


02:34 - What Is Going On Inside of Me

I have Left Temporal Brain Damage, with Emotional Regulation Problems, Memorie lost, and Sensory Overloads. And the 24 hour pains


04:40 - The Research Rabbit Hole 

Month 20 after my accident, still trying to understand why my brain was glitching daily. Nobody explained why everything felt disconnected yet connected


06:35 - The Left Temporal Discovery

Left temporal lobe injury where language, emotions, and sensory filtering live When damaged, it's like a computer virus corrupting multiple programs


07:52 - The Hemisphere Disruption

My left and right brain trying to dance to different songs. One hyperactive, one under-active. Pain wasn't just physical - my nervous system was stuck in permanent alarm mode


11:03 - The Breakthrough Realisation

Interconnection symptom clusters: Pain amplifies focus problems. Focus problems increase emotional dysregulation. And the Emotional dysregulation makes the pain worst It's one broken system, manifesting and reacting in three reactions


12:20 - Rishikesh Breakthrough 

India, lying in bed after yoga, crying quietly. My teacher mentioned nervous system regulation through breath. Desperation led to breakthrough


12:26 - The 1-4-2 Breathing Discovery 

Breathe in for 4, pauze for 16, exhale for 8. First time since my accident I could focus on just two thing without seventeen other inputs


17:14 - The Three Game-Changing Techniques

After that breakthrough, I became focused on breath work. These aren't just breathing exercises - they are my neurological medicine


19:00 - Modified Nadi Shodhana

Thumb closes right nostril, breathe in left 4 , close the nose with your left ring finger hold for 8, exhale right 6. Each nostril connects to opposite brain hemisphere


23:52 - Modified Bhramari

Thumbs in ears, fingers over eyes and face, hum like a bee. Vagal toning, brain tissue massage, reduces inflammation.


28:28 - Daily Application System

Knowing techniques vs. applying them in real life My morning system assessment and pain management protocols


31:41 - Morning Pain Protocol & Early Warning System

Squinting eyes, thousand-yard stare, then pain wave The moment I recognise this sequence, I NEED TO STOP


34:18 - Focus & Sensory Overload Management

Micro resets every 20 minutes small breathing practice

30 minute work blocks. Social situations drain brains of people with a TBI, bathroom break to resets


41:30 - The Science Behind Why It Works

Neuroplasticity in action. Understanding WHY changers the HOW Controlled neurological input teaches damaged brains new patterns. Chemical and electrical rebalancing


44:00 - Critical Recovery Points

Start slowly, consistency beats intensity, listen to your system, track responses Your injured brain might feel overwhelmed initially


45:19 - Redefining Control

Control isn't making everything go back. It's working with reality instead of fighting a fake reality Pain is still there, but I can breathe through it


46:52 - It I’sn’t about positive thinking or pretending everything is fine

Your breathing can help you Teach your brain new pathways in your brain Remember it won’t always work, but thats fine It’s how we react to it that matters


49:08 - Closing: Your Breath is Always Accessible

I'm not saying breath-work cures brain injuries. Your breath is the one thing always available


51:30 - Sometimes the Solution isn’t  Multiple Treatments

Sometimes it Just One Thing that brings you the Solution, listen to your body and to what your brain needs


Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional


This is all my personal experience as I live with my TBI

Show more...
3 months ago
52 minutes 34 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: When Your Brain Says STOP !

We Need To Talk - My Story: When My Brain Said STOP

Before my TBI, hustling until 10 PM was normal. I believed rest was earned — not needed.

Then my brain collapsed.

This is the truth about Traumatic Brain Injury fatigue: why it’s not exhaustion, why ‘pushing through’ destroys me, and how my son’s recognition of my neurological crash (when others saw attitude) became proof I needed radical change.

Rest isn’t weakness, it’s survival."


📌Timestamps: - Unlearning Old Habits 


00:00 - Introduction: The Rest Lies We Believe

"We need to talk about rest... What if everything you thought you knew about rest was actually keeping you from healing!”


01:15 - Unlearning: "Rest is Earned, Not Needed"

"The old me believed fatigue could be conquered with willpower... Society tells us productivity equals worth. My brain injury forced me to unlearn this."


03:15 - TBI Fatigue: What People Get WRONG


"It's NOT laziness. It's NOT exhaustion you can push through. My brain runs on 10% battery trying to run high demand programs. This is neurological NOT physiological.”


05:15 - My Reality: When Your Brain Short Circuits

"98% of TBI survivors experience one form of fatigue. It's a ripple effect: damaged areas force your brain to work harder, burning energy faster. Simple tasks become detours around collapsed bridges."


07:22 - Recognising the Crash: My Body's Shutdown Signals

"Squinting eyes... staring into nothingness... and the shutdown. This is 'pathological mental fatigue' my brain saying 'NO MORE.' On of my resets is  my 1-4-2 breathing technique."


09:17 - The Breaking Point: New Year's Eve in LA

"Pushing through led to disaster: a plain flight, a party, a guessing game, and a neurological shutdown. Adults saw attitude; my son saw the crash. That night, I broke. The 'push-through' person had to die."


13:35 - Recovery Truth: Healing Isn't Linear

"Monday: conquer the world. Tuesday: crushed by a phone call. This isn't failure, it's your brain rebuilding. Your capacity changes daily. Work with it."


15:10 - Unlearning Urgency: Rest Can't Wait

"I had to stop scheduling rest like a meeting. When the crash comes, it doesn't care about your plans. Fighting it extends recovery. I learned to respond earlier.”


16:16 - My New Rest Rituals (Part 1): Micro-Resets

1. One-Minute Stillness Break: Stop. Breathe. Do nothing. Permission granted.
2. My 1-4-2 Breathing: Inhale (6s) → Pause || Hold (24s) → Exhale (12s). 10-20 reps until I un-crash….This resets your parasympathatic nervous system."


18:08 - My New Rest Rituals (Part 2): Body & Awareness

3. Heat || Cold Grounding: Ice cubes, cold water, hot (warm) shower to shock your system to focus.
4. Nervous System Journaling: Track body signals & triggers. Build your early warning system.

5. The Protection Question: 'What will resting NOW protect me from? And my answers to this question.


20:27 - Redefining Rest: It’s Not Just Sleep

"Silence. Closing your eyes for 5 minutes. Removing stimulation. Meditation || Yoga. Even gentle exercise builds stamina. Rest is active neurological care."


21:30 - For Loved Ones: How to Truly Support Us

"When we say we need rest: BELIEVE US. Don’t push 'one more game.' Help us find a quiet spot. This is medical selfcare for a chronic condition. A hug helps a lot too.”


24:00 - The Hope: Rest is Resistance

"Rest makes me STRONGER. I honour pre-crashes now. My peace matters more than your pace. To the 27 million new TBI survivors yearly: 

You are not alone. 

Your brain knows. Listen. 


Join the conversation: #howsilencehelpedme  #WeNeedToTalk #rest #realtalkunfiltered #TBI #InvisibleBattles #HealingJourney #TBISurvivor 


To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience as I live with my TBI.


Keep dancing in the rain like nobody is watching.


Talk again soon.

Show more...
3 months ago
24 minutes 54 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: How Choosing Silence Helped me Take Back Control

"In this episode, I share the turning point in my TBI recovery when I realized that staying silent could actually protect my peace more than explaining ever could. I'll walk you through how brain injury changed my emotional responses, why my limbic system was stuck in overdrive, and how I learned to use 'down-regulation' as survival medicine.

From lightning fast reactions to intentional silence, from needing constant validation to finding peace within, this is the story of how I stopped burning out my energy trying to be understood and started protecting what matters most: my inner calm.

If you've ever felt exhausted from over-explaining yourself, if you struggle with emotional regulation, or if you're curious about the neuroscience behind choosing silence as strength, this episode is for you.


📌Timestamps:


00:00 - Opening/Topic Introduction - "We need to talk, talk about the moment I stopped defending myself and started choosing silence instead."


01:00 - Brain Injury Explanation Begins - "How could I stay silent when my T.B.I has taken control over my brain's ability to process thoughts, regulate emotions..."

 

03:04 - Left Temporal Lobe Impact - "My accident caused that my left temporal lobe got severely damaged." It's a survival of the brain encountering fear, confusion, frustration, uncertainty. 


04:05 - The Early Struggles - "It felt like the left side of my body just stopped working while my right side wanted to survive. No tools and knowledge to help myself. 


05:49 - 10-Year Journey - "Over the past ten years, I've had to figure out and find ways to accept and adapt."


07:16 - Healing Through Content Creation - "Making these video's and podcasts is so helpful for my healing."


08:26 - Instant Reactions Phase - "Acknowledging now that my reactions in the first 6-7 years after my TBI were instant, and as fast as lightning..."


09:37 - The Invisible Injury - "This is what living with a brain injury looks and feels like explained from my perspective."


10:52 - Not Recognising Pain Fear, Emotions- “It is so scary to not even recognise your own pain, fears and emotions, it is even scarier when you can’t see them in others”


12:36 - The Turning Point - "And that's where the answer to your question comes in. Choosing silence for me has never just been an emotional choice."

 

13:47 - Down Regulation Technique - "Later I found out this was clinically called 'down-regulation"


15:52 - Survival Medicine - "For me, a TBI survivor, this isn't just a calming technique. This is survival medicine."


18:05 - Taking Power Back - "By reclaiming the power within my internal space, helped me  change."


19:48 - People's Reactions to Silence - "What I see happening around me now is, that people don't know how to handle my peaceful silence."


21:00 - Detachment vs Avoidance - "My silence isn't an avoidance of them. It's a detachment from them and reconnection to myself."


22:22 - Not Needing Understanding - "But that kind of peace doesn't come from being understood. It comes when you stop needing to be understood..."


24:11 - Being Careful vs Fearful - "I'm careful now. Careful who I trust, who im love and who I give my energy to.. don’t mistake Careful for Fearful."


25:35 - Final Message - "For all the listeners: just know that I finally know my worth, my values..." My silence is a choice.


27:04 - Closing - "Hope I didn't ramble too much... Keep dancing in the rain like nobody is watching."



Join the conversation: #howsilencehelpedme  #WeNeedToTalk #liveingrace #realtalkunfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #HealingJourney #TBISurvivor 


To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience as I live with my TBI.

Show more...
4 months ago
27 minutes 36 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: Grief, Loss, Love and their Shattering Lessons

Grief, Love, and their Shattering Lessons…


I lost my father to cancer.

Then my mother, far too soon.

Then I lose the love I thought would last forever.

This isn’t just a story about loss, it’s about what happens when grief rewires your soul. How do you survive when the people who you loved so much are gone? When do you need to let go of the one who promised to always stay.

When even your brain betrays you, forgetting words but never their love.I’ll take you through the three losses that changed everything:


1. My Dad ~ The anchor who taught me how to lovingly say goodbye in 11 unforgettable days.


2. My Mom ~ The woman who showed me how forgiveness and grace is possible even as her body failed her, and how I became an orphan.


3. Her ~ The living soul I reach for in the dark still she isn’t there.


This is about the cruel math of grief: Missing them longer than you ever got to love them.

About abandonment that cuts deeper than death.

About fighting to reclaim your worth when loss tries to erase it.

Most of all It’s a wake-up call.

To you.

To love harder.

To hold tighter.


To stop assuming there’s always "later."

Trust me I’ve learned the hard way and the only thing worse than grief is regret.

If you’ve ever loved, lost, or feared losing someone… this is for you.

Listen, Feel and Heal 🤍

Love & light ...P


📌Timestamps:


00:00 - Seriously we need to talk : answering a Question that hit me hard and I needed to answer right away. “ What is the hardest part of loosing someone that you didn’t get enough time with” 


01:13- Losing my father was one of the hardest and also most beautiful thing I’ve ever felt. We were there for him, he was there for us. 

 

05:23 - Here is the part I don’t tolk about: The hardest part of grieving him is not loosing my father, it’s so much more.


07:23 - How my TBI hits me like a hamer in missing him. Grieve has no schedule, no mercy. 


08:45 - The Hardest Part & the tears of missing him the time to grow with him, the loss of missing what could be.


09:17 - Loosing my mom was so different, pain on another level. loosing her made me an orphan, is so crazy and lonely like nothing I felt before. 


12:56 - My mothers wisdom : forgiveness matters - opening your heart matters - letting people in matters, and regret is a luxury that not everybody get to avoid. She showed me to how to grow even while she was dying.


14:24 - How is I fair to loose them and never to get to watch our love unfold as an adult.


15:45 - Loosing my partner made me homeless. It’s a different kind of love, one you chose for. Losing that is a different kind of grief. 


17:11 - Remembering and honouring NOT what went wrong, but what went RIGHT. Even though there is pain and grieving. 

 

19:35 - This is the hardest moment, losing her in my hardest moment in life when I became a orphan. I was left with my TBI managing the loss on another demention then a normal person.


22:32 - Grieving someone thats still alive is like trying to touch fog. With death there is a spirit you can talk to and miss, with someone that is still alive feels like loving nothingness. It’s like talking to air.


24:14 - Grief taught me that nothing is promised. Real love is always worth it. Making memories on purpose is worth it. Live now and love now before it’s gone for good.


26:18 - Grief stole my self worth. Fighting to get that back every day. I'll never forget their love, it’s inside my soul and my body remembers, my hart knows.



Join the conversation: #WeNeedToTalk #liveingrace #realtalkunfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #HealingJourney #Grief 


To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.

Show more...
4 months ago
28 minutes 6 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: How the hell wil I survive this

Real Talk Unfiltered - I will be answering your questions soon.


📌Timestamps:


00:00 - My open invitation to ask me anything. 


02:07 - Sharing the first 5 questions with you.


03:35 - If one of the 5 question was your question, know I see you & I’ll do my best to answer it from my perspective.


Join the WE NEED TO TALK confersation:


#Questions about: #Trauma #Heartbreak #Recovery #Pain #Identity

Grateful for all you Honest, Raw, Genuine and Real questions,

I’ll do my best to answer them all.


To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.

Show more...
4 months ago
4 minutes 34 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: The Pain - The Sleepless Nights - Yoga - My Healing

WE NEED TO TALK:

Ten years of Pain, India and Learning to Breathe AgainI survived a car accident that deleted my memory and left me with 24/7 chronic pain.


For a decade, I’ve woken up screaming, slept in battles, and moved like every step was war. This isn’t inspiration porn.

This is my raw truth:

🔥 THE PAIN : It lives in my neck, shoulder, back. If I stop moving, it spreads like cancer. I do yoga, gym, running to survive, not to be a health freak.

🔥 THE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS : 3 AM shame. Night terrors without monsters. Years of staring at ceilings while my mind screamed. I fought sleep until I learned to breathe through the cracks.

🔥 INDIA’S WHISPER : When doctors said I’d never be 80% "me" again, a stray dog and the Ganges River taught me: "Your body is a broken temple holding the strength of gods." I didn’t heal my trauma, I healed my relationship with it.

🔥 MOVEMENT = MEDICINE : I walk, lift, and flow not to dominate pain, but to partner with it. To prove my nervous system can still feel safe.


📌Timestamps:

00:00 - My connection with Pain - .Sleep - Not Sleeping - Yoga - Meditation and memories. 


01:17 - How my brain protected me by deleting the memory of my accident. The body keeps score though, the pain never went away. 


03:12 - lets talk about the pain first. The pain never went away. I live with it, I talk with it, I try to sleep with it. And I’m making this podcast with it. I need to work with my pain, do yoga, bodywork, walking, going to the gym. I do these thing because if I stop the pain gets worst. 


05:42 - Sleeping was Hell. Not sleeping didn’t help. Healing happens when the body rests. 


07:21 - Nobody told be about the nights. Stealing staring is an agony. The mind raged on. And the Night terrors omg they were so scary.


09:13 - When a new day started I would smile like everything was fine, even if I hadn’t slept for days. Felt like nothing worked to sleep. Why wasn’t I normal and just fall a sleep.


10:22 - Healing isn’t just a daytime job, I fought lots of battles at 4 AM in my bed. I had to stop fighting to sleep, and focus on my breath. I had to find my reconnection with sleep.


11:45 - How one Call with “World Peace Yoga School & Guru Vishnu” changed and saved me. He was my last hope. How my son’s wisdom truly made me go to India. Reconnecting with my body, fighting through my pain. I started to love my body again.


16:23 - The Healing of nature especially the healing power of the Ganges River vs doing my 108 dips. The wisdom of Guru Vishnu helped me so much.


18:25 - Day 30 in India I connected with a dog called “ Brahma” just his presence helped me connect to myself and not overthink and give into my ego-mindset and broken brain.  


20:55 - Some animals are healers ever if they don’t heal you - the show you and remind you on how to heal yourself. 


22:10 - I went to India to heal my body and my brain & I learned to heal my relationship with them. 


24:02 - How movement became my medicine. How I went from every step hurting to feeling how pain is not my enemy anymore. Not fixing - I’m healing, and feeling great full even for my pain.


26:26 - My breakthrough weren’t movie like breakthrough. They were not Ahhhahh moments. They were ugly, painful quit and brutally honest. Showing up that made the difference. 


28:07 - Knowing that my healing isn’t about becoming who I was, it;’s about building a relationship with who I am now. I’m safe in the here and now. 


29:50 - Please take your story back, rewrite your book as your new you..


Join the conversation: #RealTalkUnfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #Healing #India  #YogaHealing 

To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.

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4 months ago
31 minutes 1 second

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: Storms In My Brain - I lived, I survived I fought and reclaimed myself again

Multiple Storms in My Brain: How my TBI Taught Me to Redefine "ME" Again


Part one: THE SPIRAL - How my mind betrayed me

Part two: THE STORM - Almost five years ago, I danced naked in a thunderstorm. Not metaphorically—literally.

Part three: THE SHATTERING: Sound and other Triggers. How "Traumatic Brain Injury" looks for all the outsiders looking at you.

A ghost injury: No scars. No casts. No visible wounds.

An invisible earthquake: The foundation shakes, but no rubble shows.

A broken compass: You look fine, but inside you’re lost.

A storm behind your eyes: Fog. Confusion. Fatigue. All unseen.

A mask no one notices: You seem okay. You’re just not.

A glitchy hard drive: Everything’s there. But scrambled.It’s a silent injury with loud consequences.

A wound that doesn’t bleed.And in the end—it’s just you.

Fighting a war no one sees.


📌Timestamps:


00:00 - Sharing 3 stories all 3 equally important about: surviving, thinking, dealing, feeling, healing and betrayal.


01:31 - "Everything was fine until it wasn’t” my brain declared war on me, with all the consequences.


04:06 - Taking my power back. Trusting my feelings over my thoughts. 


05:27 - To all the men listening “I know about pain”  and your tears and words and not your weakness. They give you power.


06:59 - Dancing naked in the rain. And that’s about reconnecting my fractured brain 🧠 with its forgotten body. 


11:00 - Nature reconnected my heart, my mind, my body and my soul.  I reclaimed and healed my body from the inside out. 


12:44 - I’m ok - I’m fine, until I wasn’t ok, I wasn’t fine.


13:58 - My shame cuts deep. My tears, my reaching out was seen as a weakness. 


15:33 - It’s a storm behind your eyes you’re wearing a mask so nobody sees.


17:03 - the dinner that broke my mask, I just needed to get out of there, I couldn’t handle it anymore.


Join the conversation: #realtalkunfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #healing 


To anyone fighting silent battles: You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.

Show more...
4 months ago
19 minutes 17 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My Story: I Would Never Be The Same Again

They told me I would never be the same again.


And in some ways… they were right.
But what they didn’t see coming,
it that I would build something new from the ruins.


Not the same.
So much Stronger.


📌Timestamps:


00:00 - The most important thing I will ever say: Brain Injuries are invisible, people don’t see the battles gaining in in my head.


02:46 - Need to take a breath, hard to talk about my pain and damage my TBI caused. 


04:50 - I couldn’t even remember why I was holding my toothbrush. Realising that my TBI didn’t only steel my past it also stole my present. And sensory overload on the beach.


06:53 - And then there is the memory loss. 70% of my childhood is gone. 99% of all my childhoods memories are stories told by others. Every memory I have of my childhood, even if it's not mine, I take it. Makes me connect to myself and my loved ones more.


08:27 - Word finding problems & facial recognition. They are both a different kind of hell. The way to find ways to find words, for me filler words helped me to connect some dots again.   


10:12 - Sometime I look like I’m having a stroke miming words. And conversations can feel like driving a car without a steering-weal.


11:32 - Watching for clues so I don’t crash. There are so many way to reconnect… find one or two that help you.


12:39 - Reading “Atomic Habits by James Clear” helped me a lot (the 1% rule) even with my dyslexia problems.


13:59 - The game changer “food” and food supplement with a test base. Brains are made up of roughly 60% fat, so the right omega’s helped me see better through my foggy brain. Word finding problems became lest.


15:04 - Cognitive training made me crash for days. Overload - felt like torture. 


16:12 - To anyone listening, even the smallest effort counts. Here are a few tips. 

Build new bridges.

Plan your exit

Honer your brains hangover

Time your fights and battles 

Know your triggers

Feed your brain, omega 3, polyphenols feeds your brain.

Celebrate your survival 


18:19 - Low stimulus options are an option to. Remember you are not a lab rat. My brain isn’t broken, it’s relearning. 


Join the conversation: #realtalkunfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #Healing #AtomicHabits


To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.


Show more...
4 months ago
20 minutes 4 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
We Need To Talk - My story: From Broken to Rebuilding Myself

What does “resilience” really mean? For years, I thought it meant “pushing through.” Then a traumatic brain injury (TBI) shattered my old self—and taught me that true strength is found in grace, not grit.This is my story of:

  • Losing my voice literally: I called Portobello ("mushrooms-goblin-pasta”).
  • Almost missing my son’s birthday… and the hug that saved me.
  • Rebelling against doctors who said I’d “never recover past 70%.”
  • Flying to India broken—and finding peace in breath-work, yoga, and silence.
  • Learning that healing isn’t linear—it’s a dance between being ashes and a phoenix.

📌 Timestamps:

00:00 - The accident that changed everything

04:12 - “mushroom-Goblin-pasta”: Losing my words, finding new ones

08:30 - The day I "almost" forgot my son’s birthday (and his life-changing words)

12:45 - Doctors gave up on me. Here’s how I didn’t.

17:00 - India: Hell, healing, and the 1-4-2 breath that saved me

22:10 - Why I cried over peanut butter (and what it taught me)

26:50 - My daily rituals: Gratitude, floor time, and “bad-day texts”

28:00 - For anyone crawling out of darkness: You’re not broken.💬 “Your job isn’t to silence the pain—it’s to ask: ‘What am I trying to protect?’”


👇 SUBSCRIBE for raw stories about TBI recovery, trauma healing, and rebuilding a life you love.


🎧 ON YOUTUBE TOO🔗

Connect & Support:Follow my healing journey on

YouTube @Real_Talk_Unfiltered

Instagram @Real.Talk.Unfiltered

TiKtok @RealTalk_Unfiltered

Facebook @RealTalkUnfiltered


Join the conversation: #realtalkunfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #Healing ❤️ To anyone fighting silent battles:You are not your trauma. Not your worst day. You’re the space where healing happens.


⚠️ Disclaimer: I’m not a medical professional. This is my personal experience.

Show more...
4 months ago
28 minutes 26 seconds

We Need To Talk - Real Talk Unfiltered
Real Talk: Unfiltered What does “resilience” really mean? For years, I thought it meant “pushing through.” Then a traumatic brain injury (TBI) shattered my old self and taught me that true strength is found in grace, not grit. This is my story of: Losing my voice literally: I called Portobello ("mushrooms-goblin-pasta”). Almost missing my son’s birthday… and the hug that saved me. Rebelling against doctors who said I’d “never recover past 70%.” Flying to India broken and finding peace in breath-work, yoga, and silence. Learning what healing really means