We Need To Talk - My Story: When My Brain Said STOP
Before my TBI, hustling until 10 PM was normal. I believed rest was earned — not needed.
Then my brain collapsed.
This is the truth about Traumatic Brain Injury fatigue: why it’s not exhaustion, why ‘pushing through’ destroys me, and how my son’s recognition of my neurological crash (when others saw attitude) became proof I needed radical change.
Rest isn’t weakness, it’s survival."
📌Timestamps: - Unlearning Old Habits
00:00 - Introduction: The Rest Lies We Believe
"We need to talk about rest... What if everything you thought you knew about rest was actually keeping you from healing!”
01:15 - Unlearning: "Rest is Earned, Not Needed"
"The old me believed fatigue could be conquered with willpower... Society tells us productivity equals worth. My brain injury forced me to unlearn this."
03:15 - TBI Fatigue: What People Get WRONG
"It's NOT laziness. It's NOT exhaustion you can push through. My brain runs on 10% battery trying to run high demand programs. This is neurological NOT physiological.”
05:15 - My Reality: When Your Brain Short Circuits
"98% of TBI survivors experience one form of fatigue. It's a ripple effect: damaged areas force your brain to work harder, burning energy faster. Simple tasks become detours around collapsed bridges."
07:22 - Recognising the Crash: My Body's Shutdown Signals
"Squinting eyes... staring into nothingness... and the shutdown. This is 'pathological mental fatigue' my brain saying 'NO MORE.' On of my resets is my 1-4-2 breathing technique."
09:17 - The Breaking Point: New Year's Eve in LA
"Pushing through led to disaster: a plain flight, a party, a guessing game, and a neurological shutdown. Adults saw attitude; my son saw the crash. That night, I broke. The 'push-through' person had to die."
13:35 - Recovery Truth: Healing Isn't Linear
"Monday: conquer the world. Tuesday: crushed by a phone call. This isn't failure, it's your brain rebuilding. Your capacity changes daily. Work with it."
15:10 - Unlearning Urgency: Rest Can't Wait
"I had to stop scheduling rest like a meeting. When the crash comes, it doesn't care about your plans. Fighting it extends recovery. I learned to respond earlier.”
16:16 - My New Rest Rituals (Part 1): Micro-Resets
1. One-Minute Stillness Break: Stop. Breathe. Do nothing. Permission granted.
2. My 1-4-2 Breathing: Inhale (6s) → Pause || Hold (24s) → Exhale (12s). 10-20 reps until I un-crash….This resets your parasympathatic nervous system."
18:08 - My New Rest Rituals (Part 2): Body & Awareness
3. Heat || Cold Grounding: Ice cubes, cold water, hot (warm) shower to shock your system to focus.
4. Nervous System Journaling: Track body signals & triggers. Build your early warning system.
5. The Protection Question: 'What will resting NOW protect me from? And my answers to this question.
20:27 - Redefining Rest: It’s Not Just Sleep
"Silence. Closing your eyes for 5 minutes. Removing stimulation. Meditation || Yoga. Even gentle exercise builds stamina. Rest is active neurological care."
21:30 - For Loved Ones: How to Truly Support Us
"When we say we need rest: BELIEVE US. Don’t push 'one more game.' Help us find a quiet spot. This is medical selfcare for a chronic condition. A hug helps a lot too.”
24:00 - The Hope: Rest is Resistance
"Rest makes me STRONGER. I honour pre-crashes now. My peace matters more than your pace. To the 27 million new TBI survivors yearly:
You are not alone.
Your brain knows. Listen.
Join the conversation: #howsilencehelpedme #WeNeedToTalk #rest #realtalkunfiltered #TBI #InvisibleBattles #HealingJourney #TBISurvivor
To anyone fighting silent battles:
You are not your trauma.
Not your worst day.
You're the space where healing happens.
! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.
This is all my personal experience as I live with my TBI.
Keep dancing in the rain like nobody is watching.
Talk again soon.