Hey, hey! I have been super busy but I did not want to end before sharing this episode. My guests are Lynette Talley of VIrago 24/7 (check it out! It is a fantastic podcast) and Valentine Pooley. We had this conversation over the summer and I was holding on to it for this special week. This Saturday I will turn 40! As the year draws to a close I want to celebrate this transition with conversations with some of the women in my life. I'll have a few more episodes after this one. For now, enjoy!
Also, here are links to two of the articles we discussed in the episode:
https://letslassothemoon.com/turning-40/
https://bestlifeonline.com/turning-40-2019/
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
This week's episode is with THE Laron McAdoo and THE Sean McIntosh. I will definitely need to do a part two to this episode because Sean was a surprise. He is the descendant of a legendary figure in Arkansas History, Robert "Say" McIntosh. A person "of a certain age" from the city of Little Rock, AR would know who this man was and would agree that when one thinks of Critical Patriotism, they should hear the voice of, and see the face of (in that order) Say McIntosh. Laron is a dear friend/brother/teacher/mentor and I appreciate both of these positive male figures for coming on and discussing this topic with me this week.
Links to two articles that were referenced in the show are below. This week, ask yourself "Am I a critical patriot?"
Definitions for Critical Patriotism
https://positiveorgs.bus.umich.edu/news/united-america-core-value-10-critical-patriotism/
https://www.towson.edu/news/2021/critical-patriotism.html
The 10 American Core Values
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
This week I talk to my friend and MILS-Sister (Military Spouse-Sister) Meg Kelvington. During the pandemic, between her leadership and determination to keep us Christ-centered and sane, and my determination to keep us jubilant and maybe slightly tipsy, she and I worked our magic to keep the heart and soul of our community vibrant. While much of our community-building efforts began before the shutdown in 2020, I feel, as a community, we were our best during the pandemic and this has motivated me to cultivate the same sense of community in every lived-in space I have going forward. As I get older, I find that community where one LIVES is so important. We don’t always have to go out to find a sense of belonging and although it may seem hard at first, it is possible to cultivate a sense of belonging and togetherness in heterogeneous communities. Listen as she and I share our community stories and provide advice from our lived experiences on how to create a community where it is needed most, in our neighborhoods.
About this week’s guest:
I'm kicking myself for this because during the episode I fail to really capture what a badass Meg is. Please forgive me! Meg flew helicopters, planes and deployed to Afghanistan. Now she uses her Army leadership experience to coach others through her company "Riveting Mission LLC" while being an Army Wife and mother to 4 young children. She grew up in an Army family with both her mother and father being West Point graduates. She joined the family business and graduated from the United States Military Academy in 2006. After graduating from flight school in 2008, qualified in both the Blackhawk helicopter and RC-12 Guardrail airplane, she was stationed at Hunter Army Airfield. She then deployed to Afghanistan and flew over 200 combat hours. After additional schooling, she went on to the 82nd Airborne Division and 1st Corps before leaving the Army to focus on her family and pursue coaching and mentoring. She has done work with Team Red White and Blue, Wear Blue: Run to Remember, and led groups in her local church. She and her husband, Mike, have four children, McKinley (9), Madison (8), “Mac” Arthur (5), and Moriah (2).
Find her at riveting.mission@gmail.com and on Facebook @RivetingMissionLLC and Instagram @riveting.mission.llc
She runs a Monday morning virtual group that shares a short Bible-based message and then does a workout together called "Fit To Serve." You can find details on Facebook or email her for more info.
During the show, we mention some resources that are great for women and people in general. Find links to them all below.
Breathe By Priscilla Shirer (here's an intro video too)
The Turquoise Table by Kristin Schell - We didn't talk about this during the recording but she shared it with me after. It seems like a great place to start with building community in heterogeneous spaces.
She Reads Truth Podcast
The Green Plate by Jill Connett - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6681123-the-green-plate
Oh, how I wanted to have a full episode ready this week but I have to be real with myself and you all. I am in the middle of moving and I am not superwoman (or a person who has a team to help produce this podcast. It's just me!) So, here is a quick bite and I will hopefully see you soon. Yes, there are updates and a praise report in this short episode. So take a break, listen, and plan to hear from me soon!
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Perfectionism is... the stuff of victory and defeat. Best case scenario, our perfectionist habits propel us forward in our careers and talents and we make amazing contributions to our fields. Worst case scenario, these habits drive us crazy and lead us down paths that can be harmful for ourselves and others. My guest today is Susan Warren. She is back with us (she was also featured on episode 9, Acceptance is...) to lend her counseling and therapy knowledge to this topic.
To learn more about the data and other research shared during this episode you can view the links below. Susan is thorough for sure!
DiMaggio et al. 2018- https://psychotherapy.psychiatryonline.org/doi/full/10.1176/appi.psychotherapy.2015.69.3.317 - overview and general education on perfectionism.
Dimaggio et al. 2018- https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0010440X18300555?via%3Dihub - perfectionism within personality traits
Elion et al. 2012- https://www.researchgate.net/publication/221809957_Perfectionism_in_African_American_Students_Relationship_to_Racial_Identity_GPA_Self-Esteem_and_Depression
Nilsson et al. 2008- https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Johanna-Nilsson-8/publication/264649661_The_Relationships_Among_Perfectionism_Acculturation_and_Stress_in_Asian_International_Students/links/5e1a11c492851c8364c626bb/The-Relationships-Among-Perfectionism-Acculturation-and-Stress-in-Asian-International-Students.pdf
Castro et al. 2003 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/10847633_Perfectionism_and_ethnicity_Implications_for_depressive_symptoms_and_self-reported_academic_achievement
Bieling et al. 2004 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886903002356
Maladaptive versus adaptive perfectionism. Periasamy 2002- https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1300/J035v17n02_06
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Tarot is not scary, not demonic, and not fully occult, it really depends on the operator. It took me a while to work up to wanting to understand any of the psychic arts such as card reading, palm reading, or even mediums. Between last year and this year, I have met enough people and had enough experiences to realize that the boogyman is what you make him. This week my sister Loni and I interview my friend and sorority sister Tiffany about what Tarot Card reading is and is not. There's a lot of names floating around this episode so I've listed some resources here in the show notes to help you out. Rider-Waite(-Smith) Deck Thoth Deck Aleister Crowley Pamela "Pixie" Coleman-Smith Here's another resource about Pixie My guest, Tiffany Davis is a Tarot Card reader and she can be found by any of these means: Website: tarotbytiffany.com YouTube [archived but active]: Tarot Tiffany Vimeo: Tarot by Tiffany Instagram: @tarot_x_tiffany Twitter: @tarotbytiffany You can also subscribe to her services for as low as $5 a month at Patreon. Patreon: Tarot by Tiffany. As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Did you have a great PRIDE weekend?!?! I hope so! Wrapping up our month of Love is this episode featuring two couples, a lesbian and a gay couple. I enjoyed learning their union origin stories (they are very similar or else I really am getting to be too old!) and how they maintain health and balance in their relationships. Spoiler alert!! Communication was number one on both couples' lists.
I want to thank my guests Auna and Jennifer and Reginald and Robert for taking time out to indulge me for this episode. I had fun talking to and catching up with them. I also encourage you to check out the resource links at the bottom of the episode notes. Some are mentioned in the episode.
Knowledge is power and ignorance creates fear. Power up y'all!
Resource Links:
Article about the White Horse Inn in Cali: https://www.grubstreet.com/2013/05/white-horse-inn-oakland-berkeley-oldest-gay-bar.html
Web Page for Lafittes in Exile in Louisiana: https://www.lafittes.com/about2
Unfortunately, I had to rely on Wikipedia for information about the oldest gay establishments in the country. Here are two articles I found, but I can't swear the info is all true.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Horse_Inn_(Oakland,_California)
OutRight International is an LGBTQIA+ Rights Advocacy Organization: https://outrightinternational.org/content/acronyms-explained
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Interracial love is the topic of this episode. Although Loving Day has passed, I still wanted to take this time to commemorate the day by talking with my husband Ace about our experience as an interracial couple.
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Juneteenth is... or means something different to different people. This week I discuss my views on the holiday and how my views have changed over time from my twenties until now. I put some research into this episode and learned some things that I didn't know before.
Below are links to the articles and websites I visited to create this episode.
http://nationaljuneteenth.com/Juneteenth_National.html
https://news.ucdenver.edu/juneteenth-history-why-doesnt-everyone-know-about-texas/
https://nmaahc.si.edu/blog-post/historical-legacy-juneteenth
https://www.battlefields.org/learn/articles/10-facts-what-everyone-should-know-about-civil-war
https://www.cnn.com/2019/06/19/us/juneteenth-state-holidays-trnd/index.html
https://fas.org/sgp/crs/misc/R44865.pdf
If I left something out or even got something wrong, message me! You can email me at thisyeariturn40@gmail.com or send a voice memo through the Anchor webpage for the show.
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
June is full of reasons to celebrate. The end of the school year, procurement of a degree, and even the opportunity to barbeque without fear in a semi-post pandemic world are great starters. Add to that the celebration of love and liberty and you have one month full of ticker-tape parades. Although many cities are forgoing their PRIDE parades in respect of the health and wellness of their communities, there is still room to celebrate. This month I'll feature three shows that highlight LGBTQIA couples, interracial couples, and the celebration of Juneteenth.
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
As I wrap up other projects and get ready for a post-ish-COVID summer it's time to contemplate what's next for this podcast! I'm not out of ideas, and I have some shows in mind, but at the moment, I have bitten off more than I can chew!
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins.
Check out the social media pages! I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Goals are... great to have and can be achieved by those of us who can push past disappointments, failures, and pain to get there. My husband set a goal in 2019 to run one marathon (26.2 miles) before his 40th birthday. Now, he can run that distance every weekend, unphased. This week I am with my husband, Ace Hendrix, and we are discussing his birthday accomplishment, which was running his first 100K (62.13 miles). You'd think that now that he's 40 that he's done, but wait! He has more goals with this ultra running thing!
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins.
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Depression is... part of the human experience. Whether for a moment or many, having feelings associated with depression is more common than we'd like to admit. The difference is in the frequency, duration, and symptoms of these feelings. In the past, I didn't talk much about my PDD (persistent depression disorder), and often brushed my symptoms off as simple fatigue or morphed it into anger. As I grow older, and as my social circles grow and get tighter, I am learning that these feelings that I have are not unique to me and that there are many others out there who are having the same or similar experiences. Today I'm talking about depression. Below are the resources I used to prepare for this show and the reading is quite good.
If you or someone you know is experiencing feelings of depression, please reach out to a mental health care provider near you. If you need help finding resources, start with the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 (HELP).
(Nope! It's not in MLA or APA or even Chicago Style. It is what it is!)
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-smiling-depression-4775918
https://www.columbiawell.org/blog/2019/7/22/15-real-habits-of-people-with-concealed-depression
https://sparlinmentalhealth.com/emotional-intensity-bpd/
https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/diseases/depression-anxiety.html
https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/19/well/mind/covid-mental-health-languishing.html
https://umbrella.org.nz/how-do-we-spot-languishing-and-support-people-sooner-to-flourish/
https://www.health.com/mind-body/languishing
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/why-good-vibes-only-isnt-always-a-good-thing/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3267345/
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins.
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Bonus moms are...awesome additions to a family! It can be a bumpy road at the beginning, but if one is willing to learn humility and how to put the child, or children, before ego, life could be a wonderful co-parenting existence! I am the daughter of a bonus mom and a bonus mom to my son Brayden, whose mom is a bonus mom to his three bonus brothers through her marriage to their father. This week's conversation is an exploration of our relationships, growth, mistakes, and strength. As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins. Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins.
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Change is...on the horizon! At least this is my hope. I will always remember that the year I turned 40 was the first time in my life a police officer was charged with three counts of murder for the death of a Black man in the United States. I never thought that it would happen and now that it has, I do wonder what’s next. Before the verdict, I produced a nine-minute and 29-second podcast to express my troubled feelings about the impending verdict. Never did I imagine the jury would take less than two full days to make a decision and never did I imagine the decision would be so just.
Today’s podcast was re-recorded last night with my father, Dwight Harshaw, and one of my brothers, Omavi Shukur. We discussed the verdict and our individual feelings about it. It’s interesting to hear where we agree and where we diverge. This is an example of how people of various backgrounds (although we are all family we are of different generations and have different experiences) can come to a discussion table and respectfully converse about a sensitive topic.
I am exceedingly happy for the Floyd Family and Minneapolis because now they have justice, and can rest knowing that they and the community fought hard and long for him, and won. I am equally sad for the family of Derek Chavin because his action has changed their lives forever. I pray for them because either way, whatever the outcome may have been, they too will suffer, due to association. I also agree with my brother that justice is not only punishment, it is also an opportunity for reconciliation and growth. May the Chavin and Floyd families find the time, heart, and strength to heal in this way.
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Perkins.
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Art is... beautiful, phenomenal, inspirational, and fun! My guests today are from my home state of Arkansas. They will dispel some myths about collecting art and also discuss the importance that art plays in Black culture. My first guest is Garbo Hearne, the owner and director of Pyramid Art, Books, and Custom Framing/Hearne Fine Art and artist Najee Dorsey, co-founder of Black Art in America (BAIA) and owner of Garden Art for the Soul (I forgot to mention that in the episode!), and Shop BAIA Online. Both of these art aficionados have earned their stripes as curators, collectors, and champions for Black Fine Art. Additionally, they have innovated and pioneered a path for more Black artists to be seen and known in the world of Fine Art.
To learn more about my guests, you can visit their websites by clicking the embedded links above and visiting their social media pages, provided below. If you are in Little Rock, Arkansas, I encourage you to visit Pyramid/HFA and if you find your way to Columbus, Georgia, look for BAIA shows once the pandemic allows us more mobility.
Pyramid/HFA Social Media (Facebook, Instagram) @pyramidbookslr @hearnefienart
BAIA Social Media (Facebook, Instagram) @blackartinamerica_ @najee.dorsey
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. He has filled his page with shorts and previews of the new music he is working on. I stay proud of this young man. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Adams. Thank you lady for making me look cool in a drawing!
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
Be kind to someone today; you may need someone to return the favor tomorrow!
This week I'm talking to two amazing people from my amazing home state of Arkansas. Garbo Hearne, Owner, and Director of Pyramid Art Books, & Custom Framing and Hearne Fine Art, and Najee Dorsey, Artist and Co-Founder of Black Art in America (BAIA). These two people have cultivated platforms for Black Fine Art and though their approach differs, the mission is the same: To bring awareness to the beauty of Black art and to make art created by Black artists available to the masses. The airdate for this episode is April 7th at 8:00 am.
Now, I need you and your stories! No matter your hair journey, I want to hear from you. I am planning a show about hair journies and I know we all have them! If you are willing to share a story about your hair (good, bad, or ugly) please go to the show page and leave a message, by clicking the message button. If you aren't into creating yet another account for an app, then record the message on your phone or computer and email it to me at thisyeariturn40@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you!
Today's episode is not a rant! I promise. It IS, however, an opportunity to learn about the mental health implications of legislation that will affect transgender communities, especially the youth in these communities, who are the most vulnerable. This was not the episode I'd planned for this week but legislative actions in Alabama, Tennessee, and my home state of Arkansas prompted me to change course.
Susan Warren of Cardinal Counseling, located in North Little Rock, Arkansas is my guest. The licensed professionals at Cardinal Counseling specialize in "providing therapy services with a special focus on providing Feedback-Informed Treatment in the areas of depression, anxiety, grief, trauma recovery, and relationship issues." Ms. Warren is an outpatient psychotherapist with a background in behavioral health and working in medical social work settings. I am so thankful that she agreed to this last-minute interview and my hope is that you learn from her and this conversation so that you can grow, or help someone else to grow mentally and emotionally as it concerns the LGBTQ, specifically the "T" community.
This is all love. I welcome your questions and comments and will funnel them to more informed people if I can't answer them. Thank you for coming to the pod with an open mind.
Resources!
If you want to learn more, or if something in the episode interested you, here are links to some of the things we discussed, as well as educational resources.
Survey of Transgender and Nonbinary Youth
Advancing Acceptance Infographic
The following are the bills that sparked this discussion.
Arkansas HB 1570 Vetoed by the Governor, Overridden by the Arkansas Senate, Likely to be fought in the courts
Arkansas HB 1749 Recommended to Pass
Arkansas SB 354 Sadly, this is now Act 461
As always, the music for this show is from the very talented Penn Davis. Check out his Instagram Page. He is working on a new album and has some very entertaining freestyles on his stories and page there. The official art for the show is from the very talented Michaela Adams.
Check out the social media pages for the show this week for interactive opportunities. I'm on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all as @thisyeariturn40.
