After graduating college, I had a lot of reflecting to do about life - society - my past - and myself. Through combining age old English essays, I reflect on what my thought processes in life really mean, if any of these girls whom I blame for my destitute life is truly to blame, and begin to start shaping the idea that I'm the villain in my own story. Not in a totally evil or terrible way, but it wasn't others who cased and hurt me in unimaginable ways, but it was merely myself and my expectations that caused incompatibility and disappointment.
A metaphorical short story about a boy who was dress shoes that are much too big for his feet.
My take at writing a sad, country song.
After Caroline set up a challenge to write a story about Orange, I penned this story one day after some practice standardized test (not sure why I was allowed paper and pencil, but here is the story).
Taking more stereotypes then necessary about southern country folks, and a Floridian attitude that reminds me of echoes of Hoot, this story works to incorporate song lines while setting forth the themes that words aren't important, and that once one has the moment, then they lose the hope.
Reflections of an individuals and the various aspects of his room that he thinks is the best in the world.
The version includes a lot of footnotes where I describe my various thought process behind the different attributes within the story. It may get a little bit confusing at times, but it does a good job at help showing my thoughts and the meaning behind the piece.
A man sits and describes the various aspects of his room -- convinced that he has the best of everything that he could ever get.
My cutting of - , " said the shotgun to the head - that I used for state in Poetry. The many meanings of this poem still escape me, but there is something beautiful and poetic about how it seeks to critique the world while still longing and asking questions.
An essay that I come back to time and time again as it has a clear meaning that seems to totally allude me. In this essay, I placed so much of my broken heart, so many of my questions about society, and so much of my longing for that friend - to be with 'til the end, of history.
This is a re-recording, as I originally recorded this song back when I first started recording things on here.
Another English essay to help show my pessimistic thoughts about love and society.
An English essay reflecting on a poem. This essay helps to show my general pessimistic views towards love in the world. It was written while Ashlyn and I were going out with little underlying problems from that relationship to draw on.
For my last semester of undergrad, I had a student teaching internship that did not go well. Eventually, I ended up withdrawing from that, finding other classes to take to graduate, and took my 4.0 and moved on with my life.
After reflecting over the summer, I just stayed focus on school, doing my best to get done, and get on with my life. I did have a few moments with some friends, though.
A poem written to reflect on my relationship with Jerri Lynn, particularly during the time when I was starting to really care again, and begin to recognize what it is that I had lost. Did I succeed or fail in confining our relationship to a couplet? Who knows...
Through texting a fat and sexy girl in Leanna, to writing a letter to Jerri Lynn, to hanging out with Laura, to driving up North, summer brought plenty of time for me to begin to do some healthy reflections. Though, I still had a lost left to unpack -- and still do.
After the failure of my relationship with Jerri Lynn, I slowly had to re-balance my life in the absent of friends, always knowing that there was a real chance that I might not be emotionally strong enough to continue.
The semester started off with me falling right back into isolation and depression -- trying to regain things I once had while, in many senses of the term, being the villain in my own story. But, then, a long came a friend who introduced me to an incredible girl (sounds kind of familiar?), and there was a beautiful mess of a love story between the two of us. At the very least, this love story was my motivation to continue writing this autobiography and, more specifically, my motivation for most of the Book of Purple (i.e. Season 4 of this here podcast).
After writing and reading back over the story of Jerri Lynn, I figured that a re-recording of "A Song For All Cocoa Lovers In The World" was in order. This song helps to symbolize my friendship with Laura over this time.
Note: It is explicit because I replace some words in some of the choruses with curse words. Didn't intended that when I started out, but seemed like the appropriate thing to do given its context.
What is there to say after the conclusion? This brief piece details the events of the summer after my freshman year of college while offer an introduction to the more story like aspect of the fall of the year and the first half of the Book of Purple
A quasi-poem that I wrote after Chelsea broke up with me -- expressing my concern, desires, and despair.
In the midst of my anger, I reflect on the Book of Green in light of my original introduction. Have I learn anything? Did I succeed? Was there ever any hope?