This episode explores what it really means to rediscover joy while still honoring loss. Jay shares about a recent men’s conference that reminded him of how universal grief is and how powerful it can be to talk about it honestly.
As he reflects on nearly six years since Christine’s passing, Jay wrestles with tension, the sacred space where sorrow and joy coexist. Through scripture, stories, and honest confession, he invites listeners to see that grief and joy aren’t opposites, they’re companions.
This episode is about learning to live again, to trust that joy can coexist with sorrow, and to find the courage to keep choosing life, gratitude, and God’s presence, one step at a time.
Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com
I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and help me grow the podcast. Thank you!
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After 41 episodes of walking through the valleys of grief and glimpses of grace, Jay takes a pause to look back.
In this reflective episode, he unpacks the five recurring themes that have shaped his journey so far: love, God’s relentless goodness, lament, the companionship of joy and sorrow, and trust.
Grief doesn’t stand still, it changes us. It refines, reshapes, and reminds us that even in loss, God continues to give. Through tears and truth, Jay shares what it means to keep moving forward, not away from grief, but deeper into grace.
If you’ve ever wondered whether things can truly change after loss, this episode offers a quiet but powerful yes.
Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com
I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and help me grow the podcast. Thank you!
Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t
In Episode 41 of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham explores the question every grieving heart eventually faces: What’s next? Nearly six years after the loss of his bride, Jay reflects on how grief reshapes our story, challenges our faith, and invites us to keep moving forward with courage and trust.
“What’s next” isn’t about getting over loss—it’s about integrating it into our lives, rediscovering purpose, and embracing the sacred act of releasing. With honesty, scripture, and practical insight, Jay shares how trust becomes the destination of grief and how God faithfully leads us into the next chapter of life.
Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com
I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and help me grow the podcast. Thank you!
Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t
In Episode 40 of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookinghamreflects on a surprising truth—grief doesn’t just take, it can also give back. While loss strips us down and reshapes our lives in ways we never asked for,grief can also become a strange kind of teacher, offering gifts of perspective, compassion, and a deeper awareness of God’s presence.
Through the layers of pain, Jay shares how grief has confirmed God’s promises, reminded him of His goodness, and even restored a sense of self. This episode is about learning to see grief not only as a thief but also as a giver—pointing us toward hope, transformation, and trust in God’s faithfulness.
Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com
I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and help me grow the podcast. Thank you!
Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t
In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay wraps up the Four R’s of grief with the last rhythm: Rigorous – The Holy Work of Not Giving Up.
Grief is relentless and often harsh but being rigorous doesn’t mean being harsh with yourself—it means being honest, consistent, and faithful in the hardest seasons.
Jay shares how “holy persistence” has carried him through loss, what rigorous faith looks like in practice, and why worship is hope in action. This is the hard and holy work of staying connected to God, to life, and to love—even when nothing feels stable.
In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay shares openly about navigating a difficult day of grief while leaning into the spiritual practice of repetition. He unpacks the power of “Truth Bombs”—statements of faith and identity that help reshape his perspective during loss. Jay shares his top three truths:
• I am God’s son
• I am not being punished
• I can learn to love life again
These affirmations are more than words; they are lifelines that anchor him in God’s goodness and remind him that grief does not define him. With transparency and honesty, Jay invites listeners to discover their own “truth bombs” and experience the resilience that comes from speaking truth in love to themselves.
Grief can feel like an endless, exhausting dance you never signed up for. In this episode, Jay shares how “repeatable rhythms” have been his lifeline—small, intentional choices that keep hope alive, faith anchored, and joy within reach. From raw prayer and honest journaling to speaking truth, worship, and finding beauty, these rhythms don’t just fill the day—they shape the soul. Discover how one faithful step at a time can keep you moving forward, even when the weight of loss tries to pull you under.
In this second part of our Four R’s series, Jay Cookingham explores the often-misunderstood nature of resilience. This episode dives deep into what it really means to be resilient—not as a badge of toughness, but as a testimony to God’s sustaining presence in the middle of grief, loss, and transformation.
Resilience isn’t about bouncing back or pretending everything is okay. It’s about showing up when it’s hard, standing when you’d rather disappear, and letting God meet you in the cracks. Jay shares personal stories, spiritual insights, and biblical truths that have helped him walk forward after loss. You’ll hear how restoration leads to transformation and why breaking isn’t the end—it’s the beginning of becoming someone new.
If you’ve ever asked, “Can anything beautiful come from this pain?”—this episode is for you.
Grief doesn’t take days off—and neither can we when it comes to healing. In this raw and honest episode, Jay Cookingham begins a four-part series on the “Four R’s” that have helped him walk through grief with courage and faith: Relentless, Resilient, Repeatable, and Rigorous.
Today, he starts with the one that’s anchored him from day one: Relentless.
With vulnerable reflections, Scripture, and practical steps, Jay shares what it means to keep showing up when the pain won’t let up—and how relentless faith invites us to meet a relentlessly faithful God.
This episode is for anyone who’s tired, worn out, or still carrying a grief that feels invisible to the world. You’re not alone… and you don’t have to walk this road alone.
“Maybe the most relentless thing we can do is keep choosing life—one quiet, sacred breath at a time.” – Jay Cookingham
In this deeply personal episode of the NEXT Podcast, Jay reflects on the complex emotions that surround his five-and-a-half-year mark of grief. With raw honesty and spiritual depth, he explores what it means to live in the tension between sorrow and joy, faith and frustration, longing and resilience.
Jay shares how he's learning to move forward—not by erasing the pain, but by integrating it into his journey. Through what he calls the “Four Rs of Grief Work”—Relentless, Resilient, Repeatable, and Rigorous—Jay offers a framework that gives grief meaning and space to shape us without defining us.
This is an episode for anyone walking through grief, wondering if it’s okay to say, “I still hurt, but I still believe.”
In Episode 33 of the NEXT Podcast, Jay reflects on the 5.5-year mark since the passing of his beloved wife, Christine. What does grief feel like when the calendar keeps moving, but the ache remains? What happens when the expected emotions don’t arrive on cue—or when numbness sets in instead?
Through raw honesty, scriptural reflection, and deeply personal insight, Jay shares how grief continues to reshape his life—and how God is still doing something good in the middle of the sorrow. Because as Jay says:
“The heart doesn’t get better by avoiding pain… it gets better when we let God lead us through it.”
If you’ve ever wondered how to keep believing when you are still hurting, this episode is for you.
Calendar Grief: When the Numbers Don’t Add Up
In Episode 32 of the NEXT Podcast, host Jay Cookingham opens up about “calendar grief”—those dates on the calendar that carry deep emotional weight. Whether it’s an anniversary, a birthday, or a day of loss, these numbers don’t just track time… they hold stories, and sometimes, sorrow.
As Jay reflects on what would have been his 43rd wedding anniversary, he explores how grief messes with our math—and how God meets us in the moments that no longer add up. Through a powerful personal story, practical ways to navigate hard dates, and a reminder of our identity in Christ, this episode invites listeners to embrace their grief with honesty, purpose, and hope.
Because even when the dates hurt... God never misses a moment to draw near.
In this honest and deeply reflective episode, Jay explores how grief doesn’t just take—it reshapes. After the loss of his wife Christine, Jay found himself facing a deep question: “Who am I now?”
Grief may feel like it’s stealing everything familiar—purpose, peace, even identity—but it can also become a teacher. Jay unpacks how sorrow can actually refine us, drawing us back to the truth of who we are in Christ.
This episode digs into the pain and purpose of lament, the redemptive power of God’s compassion, and the unshakable foundation of sonship in the middle of identity-shifting loss. Whether you're grieving or walking with someone who is, you’ll find encouragement, truth, and grace here.
In this honest and deeply personal episode, Jay shares about one of the least-discussed aspects of grief: sexual bereavement and Widower’s Fire—the overwhelming longing for intimacy after the death of a spouse.
This episode opens the door to a conversation many avoid—especially in the church—and offers encouragement, grace, and practical steps for Christian men navigating this form of loss. Jay speaks vulnerably about the loneliness that comes with losing not just a partner, but the physical, emotional, and spiritual connection that intimacy brought to marriage.
Whether you’re a widower, a friend, a pastor, or someone trying to better support those in grief, this episode offers something vital: permission to name what hurts, space to be seen, and hope that God meets us even in the most uncomfortable places.
Giving Space to Grieve Honestly
In this heartfelt episode, Jay shares a vulnerable and honest conversation around the well-meaning but often painful things people say to those who are grieving. Drawing from personal experience, he offers real-life examples, simple responses, and a call to compassion.
More than a list of what not to say, this episode is an invitation—to walk gently with the grieving, to give them space to feel, and to resist the urge to “fix” what can’t be fixed. Jay also speaks candidly about what it means to move forward in grief while still deeply feeling the weight of loss—and how sadness and faith can live side by side.
Whether you’re grieving or supporting someone who is, this episode offers grace, understanding, and practical insight for the journey.
In this deeply personal episode, Jay explores the often-overlooked emotional terrain of grief—especially for men. Through raw honesty and spiritual reflection, he unpacks how emotions aren’t enemies to conquer, but messengers to learn from. Jay shares how he uses his pain as fuel for healing, creativity, and worship, offering practical ways to process sorrow without shame. From quiet tears to riverbank outbursts, this episode is a powerful reminder that regulating emotions is not weakness—it’s worship.
Whether you’re grieving or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers hope, direction, and space to feel.
In this special post-Easter edition of the NEXT Podcast, Jay shares raw, honest reflections recorded the day after Resurrection Sunday. After taking time away to intentionally reflect on Holy Week, Jay opens up about where he is in his grief journey—five years, four months, and six days after Christine’s passing.
This “Current Mood” episode explores themes of resilience over recovery, how love—not just faith—has carried him through the darkest seasons, and why choosing life each day is an act of worship.
Jay also shares a deeply personal story about Christine’s childhood dream of becoming a ballerina, how she lived out that dream in grace and spirit, and what that means for those of us learning to dance with grief.
If you’ve ever wondered how to hold both sorrow and joy, how to walk in resurrection power even when your heart is breaking—this episode is for you.
https://jaycookingham.com
In this episode of the NEXT Podcast, we continue exploring the myths surrounding grief—especially the pressure to “move on,” or “find closure,” and the belief that time alone brings healing.
I share honestly about what it means to live with loss beyond the first year, the unexpected ways pain deepens over time and how embracing that pain with God’s presence can actually grow your capacity for joy.
This episode is raw, reflective, and rooted in hope. If you’ve ever felt like your grief doesn’t fit a timeline, this conversation is for you.
Grief doesn’t follow the rulebook. In this episode of the NEXT podcast, host Jay Cookingham unpacks one of the biggest myths about grief—the idea that it moves in predictable stages. Society tells us we should process loss in a neat, orderly way, but real grief is messy, unpredictable, and deeply personal. Jay shares his own journey, challenging the common misconceptions that hold us back from healing and offering a perspective rooted in faith and hope. If you’ve ever felt like you’re “grieving wrong,” this episode is for you.
Grief isn’t just about losing a spouse—it’s about losing all the roles they filled in your life. One of the deepest losses I’ve faced is losing Christine not only as my wife, but as my sister in Christ—the one who prayed with me, encouraged me, and challenged me in my faith.
In this episode, I reflect on:
• How Christine’s faith and friendship shaped our marriage
• Why losing a spouse changes every other relationship in your life
• The struggle of missing spiritual intimacy and deep conversations
• How grief unravels us—but how God is knitting something new together
• What it means to bring this kind of loss to Jesus and worship Him there
For those who have lost a spouse, a best friend, or a spiritual companion, I see you. You don’t have to carry this grief alone. Join me as I process this layer of loss and seek hope in the presence of God.
Listen now and take the next step forward in your grief journey.