As a manager, part of your job is to speak up. But as a human, you might feel anxious or reluctant to do so. Here's what might hold you back from speaking up at work -- and how can you learn to have more authentic confidence to speak up. Let's discuss!
This episode originally aired as Ep. 83: Speaking Up.
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Being observant and adaptive are two skills that will serve you well as a leader. You'll become more present and capable in responding to the moment and any challenges that arise.
In this episode, I walk you through a simple practice that I used to teach in my Essential Skills for Managers course. You'll gain more clarity of mind and action as you reflect and make a list of your observations. It's a great activity to do at the end of the year.
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As you rise into higher levels of responsibility and visibility, you may start to get feedback about "developing executive presence."
If you've ever felt confused by what that means, you're not alone!
It's rarely something we learn about early in our work life, and it's often not described in much detail. So it can seem elusive and ambiguous.
In this episode, I break down how I think about Executive Presence and give some specific examples to help new managers think about what exactly it means, and how to get it.
Let's discuss!
This episode was originally published in 2022 as Episode 99.
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As you rise into higher levels of responsibility and visibility in your career, at some point you're likely to get feedback about your executive presence. Let's start with recognizing you already have a presence, and that it has an effect on those around you.
In this episode you'll gain a better understanding of what presence is, and how to recognize it in others. It's the first step to cultivating your own executive presence and wielding it in a useful way at work.
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After the Episode
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
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Reach out for private coaching, team workshops or off-sites:
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Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
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Into meditation? This is for you:
https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work
Being a great manager doesn't require you to be a hero. But you might slip into that mindset.
It can look like perfectionism, and anxiety about how others see you.
It leads to overworking, isolating, and being overly responsible.
It also creates a lot of pressure, feeling like everything is on your shoulders and it's up to you to keep everything together (no mistakes allowed!).
In this episode, you'll learn more about why the hero mindset is easy to slip into, and how it will hold you back from being an effective leader. You'll also learn why seeing yourself as a whole human is the key to managing yourself and your own wellbeing. Let's discuss!
The book referenced in this episode is Persephone Returns by Tanka Wilkinson
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After the Episode
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
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Reach out for private coaching, team workshops or off-sites:
~
Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
~
Into meditation? This is for you:
https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work
The way you define a problem will point you towards a certain set of solutions. When you reframe the problem, you will start to see new kinds of solutions. It can be kind of magical. Let's discuss!
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After the Episode
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
~
Reach out for private coaching, team workshops or off-sites:
~
Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
~
Into meditation? This is for you:
https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work
If you're conflict avoidant, or grew up as the peace-maker in your family or friend group, then save this episode! You probably have a gut sense that conflict is bad, and must be prevented. But did you know that conflict can actually be an indicator of psychological safety?
Conflict is a normal part of human relationships. What's important is what kind of conflict it is, and how you handle it. Let's discuss!
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After the Episode
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
~
Reach out for private coaching, team workshops or off-sites:
~
Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
~
Into meditation? This is for you:
https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work
Confidence is not all or nothing -- it's not something you have or you don't. It's also not something that's rock solid or non-existent.
Instead, see it as a dynamic quality inside you that can help keep you steady through uncertainty and change. Learn to identify it in yourself, so that you can access it when needed.
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After the Episode:
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
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Connect on LinkedIn:
Every manager needs to learn now to give effective feedback.
It's ok if it doesn't come naturally -- you can learn how to do it well.
Thinking in terms of "Feedback as a Service" takes the pressure off, and helps you feel like you're on the same team. This episode will give you a useful way to think about how to give feedback, be human, and create a working relationship that works for everyone.
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After the Episode:
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
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When you're more comfortable with the skill of feedback, your life becomes so much easier! In this episode you'll get some simple ways to build up your skills, so you're ready when the time comes.
Practice pays off! When you feel more confident in your skillset, you're less likely to stress over or avoid important conversations.
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After the Episode:
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
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It's frustrating when you don't feel heard. And: sometimes we forget that listening is NOT the same as agreement, compliance, or obedience. We can hear someone, and still have different priorities, or choose different trade-offs.
Today, we're revisiting Episode 51, Opinion Tennis, which is when you have two or more people talking and no one feels like anyone is listening. You can use what you learn in the workplace, and in your personal relationships, too!
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After the Episode:
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
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Explore private coaching, team off-sites and workshops:
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Let's connect on LinkedIn:
A big part of being a manager comes down to relational skills, and realizing that communication isn't just about what you convey. It's also about your ability to listen. This is a good practice, especially if you tend to jump into solution mode! Because sometimes your job as a manager is NOT to solve the problem -- but to listen deeply and understand the bigger context and what's really going on.
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After the Episode:
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
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Explore private coaching, team off-sites and workshops:
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Connect with me on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
When you're clear on what success means as a manager, you will have an easier time focusing on what matters and letting the rest go. This can be tricky at first, especially when you care a lot and are a high-achiever. The uncertainty of what "success" means can be frustrating and anxiety provoking.
This week, we revisit Ep. 175 - Defining Success as a Manager.
After the Episode:
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This special guest episode is from The Confidence Lounge, a podcast hosted by Elyse Conroy, Confidence Coach and Career Strategist for women in the beauty industry. Elyse invited me onto her show earlier this year, and we talked about what it actually takes to rise in your career and lead with confidence.
Learn about The Beauty Career Lab LIVE:
https://www.soulmakeup.com/beautycareerlablive
Connect with Elyse on IG or LinkedIn:
https://www.instagram.com/elyseconroyxo/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/elyseconroy/
**After the Episode**
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
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Connect with me on LinkedIn!
Today we're taking another listen to Ep 188: Working with Difficult People. The goal is not to prevent or avoid all difficulty, or friction at work. Instead, it's to increase your capacity for discomfort AND gain confidence with some tools and a mindset that will enable you to respond in a useful way. This way, you step out of reactivity and feeling powerless -- and become a more responsive, capable leader.
**After the Episode**
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
Talk with me about private coaching, team off-sites and workshops:
Connect with me on LinkedIn!
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
There are a few reasons why people have chosen to study with me, or hire me as their coach -- and sometimes, it's because they want help managing difficult people. Today I share a story from my own career journey of managing a difficult person, and what I learned from it that can help you move forward, too.
**After the Episode**
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
Talk with me about private coaching, team off-sites and workshops:
Connect with me on LinkedIn!
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
When it comes to feedback, most managers focus so much on how to give it to their team, that they completely forget to consider: How can I get quality feedback?
And the truth is, the higher you go in your career the harder it is to get good feedback! Your boss will be busier than ever. You will be expected to take responsibility for your own professional development, and have the self-awareness needed to know what to work on.
And the more power you have, the more people will want to keep you happy -- and will be less candid with you about your blind spots.
In this episode I'll walk you through a few simple steps to make it easier for you to get quality feedback.
** After the Episode**
Enroll in Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
Get private coaching, or support for your team development:
Connect with me on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
Being a manager requires relational skills, because you're not just managing work you are managing people and relationships. That's why communication is so important.
**After the Episode**
Join the next cohort of Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
Reach out for private coaching to deepen your personal growth and accelerate your professional development (mindfully!):
Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
Hey, you are a human first. (Sometimes that seems to get lost in all of the conversations about leadership and how to be a good manager.) So in today's episode, I'm sharing three prompts to shift the conversation -- to center you as a human person, first.
Who you are as a person, and how you're doing in your life, will absolutely influence how you lead.
**After the Episode**
For private coaching, go to kimnicol.com
Deepen your personal growth and boost your professional development with Communication Strategies
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
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https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol
Why would a kind person start micromanaging people, even when they care deeply and want to do a good job? It happens more often than you might think! And it's often by accident.
Managing people is a different job than being an Individual Contributor (IC). It requires a different mindset and skills -- "what got you here won't get you there," as the saying goes. Anyone can drift towards micromanaging. In today's episode, find out why this happens, and what you can do about it.
**After the Episode**
Enrollment in Communication Strategies for Managers:
https://maven.com/kimnicol/communication-strategies
For private coaching focused on your personal goals and professional development:
Connect with me on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimnicol/
Become a more calm and confident leader:
https://insighttimer.com/meditation-courses/mindfulness-for-managers-at-work