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The Devil You Don’t Know
Lindsay Oakes
69 episodes
1 day ago
Send us a text A chilling premise sets the stage: what if murder became the purest form of communication? We invited author John A. Vines to unpack that provocation through his debut novel, “The World Is Angry,” a Houston-rooted psychological thriller that opens in New Orleans and peers straight into our collective nerves. John walks us through the craft choices that make the story thrum—why a friendship triangle reveals character under pressure, how dialogue can move plot without preaching, ...
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Society & Culture
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All content for The Devil You Don’t Know is the property of Lindsay Oakes and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Send us a text A chilling premise sets the stage: what if murder became the purest form of communication? We invited author John A. Vines to unpack that provocation through his debut novel, “The World Is Angry,” a Houston-rooted psychological thriller that opens in New Orleans and peers straight into our collective nerves. John walks us through the craft choices that make the story thrum—why a friendship triangle reveals character under pressure, how dialogue can move plot without preaching, ...
Show more...
Society & Culture
Episodes (20/69)
The Devil You Don’t Know
A Conversation with Author John A. Vines: A Reflection on "The World is Angry": Murder, Meaning, And Modern Rage
Send us a text A chilling premise sets the stage: what if murder became the purest form of communication? We invited author John A. Vines to unpack that provocation through his debut novel, “The World Is Angry,” a Houston-rooted psychological thriller that opens in New Orleans and peers straight into our collective nerves. John walks us through the craft choices that make the story thrum—why a friendship triangle reveals character under pressure, how dialogue can move plot without preaching, ...
Show more...
1 day ago
49 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Wendy Correa Author of My Pretty Baby: How One Woman Rewrote Her Story And Broke The Cycle
Send us a text What happens when your family’s secrets become the script your body follows? We invited author Wendy Correa to share the story behind her memoir, My Pretty Baby, and the result is an honest, generous conversation about childhood grief, domestic volatility, and the slow, steady work of healing. From losing her father at seven to navigating a stepfamily shaped by fear and intermittent warmth, Wendy traces how unspoken pain wires our biology—and how breath, therapy, and brave stor...
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1 week ago
1 hour 7 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Stop Negotiating With Yourself: How Consistency Builds Self-Trust and Health
Send us a text What if the loudest voice in your head—the one bargaining for “just one glass,” “I’ll start Monday,” or “I deserve this”—could be turned down to a whisper? We dig into the art of deciding once and following through, using simple rules, small wins, and default responses that remove the need for constant willpower. From morning walks that shrink from 45 minutes to 27, to “no fried food” rules that make menus easier, we show how constraints can create freedom and why pre-decisions...
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3 weeks ago
34 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Saying Yes To What Is: An Antidote to Suffering
Send us a text What if the pain you feel isn’t the problem—what if the fight against it is? We dive into the quiet habit of saying “no” to our own emotions, how that creates the “second arrow” of suffering, and why radical acceptance can be the most practical, compassionate path forward. From grief and breakups to career ruts and body goals, we share real stories and useful tools for meeting hard moments without numbing or spiraling. We unpack the difference between pain and suffering, and h...
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4 weeks ago
48 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Undoing the Us vs. Them: The Trap of Toxic Othering
Send us a text Lindsay and Cleveland dive into the concept of toxic othering and how it affects our relationships and society at large, exploring practical ways to bridge divides through mindfulness and self-awareness. • The problem of "othering" creates division between groups based on race, religion, politics, and personal beliefs • Why we judge and isolate others: learned behaviors from childhood and society • How othering creates two prisons - one for the "othered" and one for those doin...
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1 month ago
40 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Your Emotional Triggers Are Actually Medicine in Disguise: Turning Reactivity into Wisdom
Send us a text Have you ever wondered why certain people or situations trigger such intense emotional reactions in you? What if those triggers aren't just annoying disruptions but actually powerful messengers trying to reveal something important about your unhealed wounds? In this thought-provoking episode, we dive deep into the concept of turning reactivity into wisdom. Instead of the typical blame game we play when triggered ("How could they be so insensitive?"), we explore a radical alter...
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1 month ago
48 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Rise Above the Script: Why Your Brain Fights Your Biggest Breakthroughs a Conversation with Albert Bramante PhD
Send us a text Have you ever found yourself on the verge of a breakthrough only to sabotage your progress? You're not alone. In this deeply insightful conversation with Dr. Albert Bramante, performance psychologist, talent agent, and author of "Rise Above the Script," we explore the hidden narratives that keep even the most talented individuals stuck. Our brains are hardwired for comfort and safety—evolutionary adaptations that once protected us but now hold us back. Dr. Bramante reveals why...
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2 months ago
55 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
The Divorce You Don’t Regret: Mediation, Money & Moving On a Conversation with Mediation Expert Joe Dillon
Send us a text Joe Dillon, co-founder of Equitable Mediation Services, shares how couples can navigate divorce with clarity, compassion, and collaboration rather than through costly, emotionally destructive litigation. • Divorce doesn't have to be a disaster or train wreck if couples choose to move forward amicably • Mediation promotes "win-win" scenarios instead of the "win-lose" or "lose-lose" outcomes common in litigation • "Interest-based negotiation" focuses on finding alternatives that...
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2 months ago
55 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Jack Ruins Everything: When Adult Children Hijack Your Peace
Send us a text Cleveland and Lindsay explore the problem of adult children controlling their parents' lives, sparked by overhearing a family vacation conversation about how "Jack ruins everything." They examine the balance between loving your adult children and preventing them from disrupting your peace and happiness. • Adult children are guests in your home, not entitled residents • Setting boundaries doesn't mean you don't love your children • Cultural differences in the Caribbean demonstr...
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3 months ago
49 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
The Alchemy of Acceptance: The Power of Embracing Your Pain
Send us a text We explore the concept of emotional acceptance and how confronting rather than avoiding difficult feelings is essential to healing from trauma. Transformation happens when we learn to accept our emotions and reframe our relationship with past pain. • Understanding why "you've got to feel it to heal it" • Exploring how trauma physically lives in the body as "issues in the tissues" • Learning about the destructive impact of shame and negative core beliefs • Recognizing unhelpful...
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4 months ago
40 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
The Window, The Car, and The Dress: Tales from the Parenting Trenches
Send us a text Lindsay and Cleveland explore the messy reality of parenting through recent chaotic events in their household, from a crashed car and shattered picture window to prom dress drama and boundary-setting with young adult children. • A car crash in the driveway leads to insurance claims and unexpected Enterprise rental experiences • The Queen Mom's prom dress saga involves ordering twenty dresses and last-minute shoe shopping • A well-intentioned furniture cleaning attempt results ...
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4 months ago
27 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Why Trusting Your Gut Changes Everything
Send us a text Most people don't trust themselves, constantly seeking external validation and living unhappy lives despite trying to please everyone around them. • Self-trust means being comfortable with who you are rather than constantly seeking approval • When you don't trust yourself, you give up command of your life and surrender your agency • Setting boundaries aligns with self-trust and allows you to identify who respects you • Family relationships often challenge our self-trust when w...
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4 months ago
47 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Are You Together?
Send us a text Shores of Nevis From the white sands of Nevis, we find ourselves reflecting on a deceptively simple question: What does it mean to truly be together? For us, an interracial couple navigating the rhythms of a blended family, this question surfaces in unexpected places – in the confused looks of airline staff separating us during boarding, in the puzzled expressions of theme park employees unsure how to categorize our family. These moments, often met with laughter now, point to a...
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6 months ago
50 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Island Escapes and Life Lessons: Finding Paradise in Nevis
Send us a text What starts as a terrifying moment pre-flight turns into a wake-up call I didn’t know I needed. On our way to Nevis, I fainted on the plane—no warning, just out cold. The timing felt awful... until we found out later that the plane’s computer system failed after we got off. What seemed like bad luck was actually divine intervention, and it shook me awake in more ways than one. From the porch of our quiet villa in Nevis, Lindsay and I talk about the deep contrast between the rel...
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6 months ago
30 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
The Gravity of Unspoken Expectations: Why Your Partner Isn't a Mind Reader
Send us a text Cleveland and Lindsay return after a long break to tackle the frustrating phenomenon of silent scripts in relationships and why expecting your partner to read your mind sets you both up for failure. • Silent scripts are unspoken expectations we have for our partners but never communicate directly • The absurdity of expecting mind-reading from partners when we'd never expect it in other relationships • Covert contracts create one-sided agreements where we expect something in re...
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6 months ago
58 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
The Breath Reset: Breaking Free From Perfectionism
Send us a text Self-judgment holds us back from authentic growth by triggering stress responses and reinforcing negative beliefs about ourselves. Perfectionism, deeply rooted in childhood experiences and amplified by social media, creates impossible standards that disconnect us from our true selves. • Our brains evolved for survival not happiness, making negativity our default mode • Self-criticism raises cortisol levels by 37%, creating physical stress responses • Gabor Maté's compassionate...
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7 months ago
40 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Separate and Unequal: America's School Segregation Crisis
Send us a text Educational segregation in America has reached crisis levels, with schools more segregated today than in the 1980s, despite Brown v. Board of Education supposedly ending this practice decades ago. We explore how systemic issues including funding disparities, zoning policies, and power structures maintain educational inequality across racial and economic lines. • Shocking statistics reveal non-white school districts receive $23 billion less annually than white districts • The p...
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7 months ago
54 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
I Don't Have A Point to Prove: Why Every Argument Isn't Worth the Fight
Send us a text In this engaging episode, we explore the ramifications of fighting over every point and why it often leads to unnecessary stress and emotional exhaustion. Through candid discussions, we share personal anecdotes that shed light on how the need to be right in our current divisive climate impacts our relationships and overall well-being. This episode uniquely draws on the reasons why politeness and effective communication are not just desirable, but essential in a time when politi...
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8 months ago
1 hour 3 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Do Better Next Time
Send us a text Our recent episode focuses on empathy and the vital role it plays in countering division in today's world. We highlight Dave Chappelle's (SNL 50) poignant remarks on humanity, trauma, and compassion in the wake of societal upheaval, urging listeners to reflect on how they can elevate empathy in their own lives. • Exploring Chappelle's perspective on division and empathy • The necessity of compassion in mental health • Realizing the uniqueness of each individu...
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9 months ago
47 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Accountability is an Inside Job
Send us a text This episode centers on the theme that accountability is fundamentally an inside job, exploring the connection between personal responsibility and healing through acceptance. We discuss stories of transformation, lessons from experts like Gabor Maté and Mel Robbins, and personal experiences that highlight the challenges of taking ownership in our lives. • Accountability starts with self-reflection • Insights from the Hope Program on personal transformation • ...
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9 months ago
32 minutes

The Devil You Don’t Know
Send us a text A chilling premise sets the stage: what if murder became the purest form of communication? We invited author John A. Vines to unpack that provocation through his debut novel, “The World Is Angry,” a Houston-rooted psychological thriller that opens in New Orleans and peers straight into our collective nerves. John walks us through the craft choices that make the story thrum—why a friendship triangle reveals character under pressure, how dialogue can move plot without preaching, ...