In this very strange crossover episode of The Crowded Hour and Remembering I'm an Animal, Billy and Jody are back together. It will make sense if you listen. Probably.
It's been a little over a year since Jody and Billy decided to start documenting this journey they call "Remembering I'm an Animal." Thirty-seven episodes later, the boys take a look back, list their highs and lows, and look ahead to more species-appropriate behaviors.
If you've been listening, thank you. If you haven't, it would be kinda weird if you were reading this.
It's been a while since the boys have done an old-school, multi-topic episode, so settle in. And, once again, Billy announces his New Life Plan.
Plus: the three (and a half) types of fun; the collapse of the metaverse; how "avid" hikers are the heavyweight champions of Mr. Outdoors behavior; lots of life lessons from Stephen King; the misnomer that substance abuse plays any positive role in creativity; and the most important question that will never be answered: Who is the youngest person named Dick?
In a very surreal turn of events, much of Billy's personal quest comes to a climax. Except it wasn't Billy doing it. It was Jody.
F-ing Jody.
(Speaking of F-ing Jody, he got Covid, which is why it has been so long since our last episode. But there's another one coming right behind this fella.)
Chris Borgatti was a high school science teacher at a prep school, until a challenging question from a student made him face a dilemma that is central to this podcast: Why didn't he hunt for his own food?
Fast-forward nine years and Chris has become an acclaimed hunter and conservationist, and has left the classroom to become the New England and New York coordinator for Backcountry Hunters & Anglers.
Chris takes Billy hunting (behind Jody's back), and it goes so well -- while also raising many challenging questions -- that Billy fires Jody as his mentor and hires Chris.
So much drama, people. So much.
Following a disastrous assignment where he attempted to smoke his way through the tiny town that has become the Pot Capital of America, Billy is back and firing on all cylinders, with some insights about what it is we're chasing on this program, this algorithm to animal authenticity, and how hitting it 80 percent of the time is the goal.
Plus: Jody gets the authorities called on him for legally hunting; some insights from the long life of "the world's dirtiest man;" feedback from listeners who claim to be hip experts; and more bullying until Billy agrees to enter a swim race against a 77-year-old woman in 34-degree water.
This whole mess of a story started for Billy years ago at an agricultural fair, and a return visit this time around brings back all the questions about our relationship to food.
This all goes down as another suburban hunting season gets going. How's it going? Nowhere.
Plus: one of the boys finds out they need a new hip; the magical feeling of lateral momentum; more trash-talking from a 77-year-old cold water swimming bully in Maine; and how a Radiohead song from 1997 predicted the Instagram wellness cult of today.
We humans are living in a time of evolutionary mismatch, asked to live a life we were not designed for.
Our DNA demands better from us, so on this show we discuss how to listen to it, to take take dance lessons from it.
That plus the magic of knots, and the 77-year-old Maine woman who continues to challenge Billy to a swim race in 34-degree water.
The "llst" of the fundamental evolved abilities of the human species is long and impressive. But can you boil that list down to the fundamentals, the 9 abilities that showcase the best "magics" of the Homo sapiens?
Plus: the toxicity of deadlines; why briefs are more primitive than boxers; and whether to dance or fight.
Martha Wood is something of a myth on the North Shore of Massachusetts, a real-life mermaid who seems to thrive in water cold enough to kill.
Today on the show, the 59-year-old Wood tells the story of how a botched colonoscopy led her into the winter ocean, beginning a journey that culminated a few weeks ago when she swam across the fabled English Channel.
A few months ago, the boys asked themselves the question: What's the one thing you could change about yourself, that you would change, that you're not changing?
For Billy, it was to stop poisoning himself each day with crappy food and drink. That effort has gone so-so, and it was incomplete, because it missed the third major self-poison of the modern world: crappy media. So a new effort to achieve poison-independence has begun.
Plus, Billy goes to Vermont to visit America's most famous fly fisherman, Tom Rosenbauer, to again try to answer the question: Is fly-fishing just a bunch of self-indulgent bull$hit?
Also on the show, Jody's crypticness gets cryptic; the primal appeal of creating through Substack; the ethics of rock cairns; a lobster dive ends in an emasculation; and a breakdown of new research that makes the very clear case that alcohol is the single most dangerous self-administered poison of the modern world.
It's a fun show. For real.
Inspired by comedian Nikki Glaser, the boys discuss the problems living in a world where there is so much information about food and alcohol, so many experts, that you stop listening to yourself, the part that says "Have you tried moderation?"
Billy pays a visit to the "Woodstock of hunting" to see what the new age hunters are up to.
Jody tells the story of spending a night sleeping high up in a tree.
Plus.... the primal pleasures of rollerblading, the terrible trend of disemvoweling, and the rather insane story of how Billy waited until he was standing at the open door of an airplane to decide that skydiving was not a species-appropriate activity.
We came from the trees, and there remains deep inside of us a desire to return to them.
On this episode, the boys are joined by Andrew Joslin, a legend in tree climbing who has scaled some of the largest trees on earth, and then spent the night in them.
Joslin recounts his storied career, his side business rescuing cats, and his wild day trying to get Billy up into a tree canopy (which quickly goes sideways, to the shock of no one).
Plus Jody talks about his own past as a "recreational tree climber," which impresses Joslin (who needed impressing after the "ceiling" incident with Billy).
Billy returns from a long vacation to rant about how misguided the modern idea of "vacation" has become. Or something like that.
Jody leads a mindblowing explanation of the aquatic ape theory.
Plus Billy explains the smart reason he declined the chance to give a TED Talk, and the reason why he thinks instead he's going to write a great book.
That plus non-alcoholic beer, praise for the American redneck, and the birth of the term "magics."
On this episode, the boys process all the things they've learned from freedive master Whitey Baun, and tell the story of the breathing exercise he put them through after the mics were turned off (which nearly tripled the amount of time each could hold their breath, instantly). They also take a deeper look into the mind-blowing science behind the Master Switch of Life (see link below).
Plus, they look at the states where it's legal to own a chimpanzee, our closest living relative; the 10 Primal Blueprint Laws; learning from our elders; Jody eats more wild crap; and even more examples of being a Billy.
Don't be a Billy.
https://magicseaweed.com/news/the-master-switch-what-happens-to-your-heart-when-you-dive-into-the-sea/6771/
When the human body takes a deep breath and dives down into the ocean, it reflexively sets off a series of physiological responses so magical that it has been called "The Master Switch of Life."
To connect with that switch, the fellas connect with Whitey Baun, a freediving master who at age 72 has been called the dean of the underwater world in Massachusetts. A day after taking Billy for a humbling, frightening, and ultimately inspiring dive off the coast, Whitey sits down at the mic to talk about his extraordinary life, and the meditative calm he can only find at the bottom of the ocean.
Here's a link to some great information about the Master Switch of Life, excerpted from the excellent book "Deep" by James Nestor:
https://magicseaweed.com/news/the-master-switch-what-happens-to-your-heart-when-you-dive-into-the-sea/6771/
After a brief summer break, the boys are back, and Billy reveals he has been conducting an experiment for three weeks where he followed the diet of our ancestors, the ones who ate like Homo sapiens and consumed only two things: plants and animals. The results have been so positive that you'll probably want to skip this part of the podcast because no one wants to hear about how good he feels.
Instead, skip to the part where he talks about he never would have survived in the time of our ancestors because of his extraordinary ability to repel wild animals, as told through the stories of three recent can't-miss fishing trips where he most definitely missed. What is with this frigging guy? Don't be a Billy.
And the boys start making plans for future explorations of the incredible abilities of the human animal. Jody agrees to row around Cape Ann; Billy finds a 72-year-old man who is going to teach him how to freedive to the bottom of the ocean; and they commit again to run up Mt. Washington (for real this time).
This plus a rant against the salesmen who dominate the male wellness space. We aren't going to sell you any answers on this show. Instead, we're running a question factory.
Gloucester, Massachusetts is America's oldest fishing port, and for generations, as part of a festival to celebrate St. Peter, the patron saint of fishermen, its young men have tested themselves in a dangerous contest known as "The Greasy Pole."
At the young age of 47, our hero, Gloucester-native Dr. Jody Simoes, walked The Greasy Pole for the first time, connecting to the ancient lineage of male rites of passage.
Mt. Washington delivers on its promise of being home to "The World's Worst Weather" when Jody tries to run up it, in a chaotic day on the highest mountain in New England.
Elsewhere, Billy launches #shirtlesssolstice, sunscreen is the new margarine, and more discussion of the ultimate riddle of the conscious modern man -- What the hell should I eat? -- as the guys continue their attempt to read the owner's manual written into their genes so they can restore these Homo sapiens to factory settings.
Also, fuck fishing.
You ever try to feed a dog something they're not "supposed" to eat? People lose their shit. Yet we feed the same crap to ourselves and our children without a second thought.
At the same time, the question of what we should be eating is so clouded with pseudoscience and fad diets that it's impossible to know who is right. Or if there is such a thing as the "right" diet for humans.
Here on the little show, we lean toward ancestral, species-appropriate behaviors, but in a modern world. Its a blend, and nowhere is that blend tougher to maintain than with what we eat.
So today, the boys pick through Michael Pollan's painfully practical "food rules," which are simple, time-tested (which we love) ideas about how to eat, and how to avoid stressing too much about what you eat.
Also on the show, Jody details the emotions of his roller-coaster ride since finding out he's going to walk the Greasy Pole at the St. Peter's Fiesta; the launch of the "shirtless solstice" movement; and Billy explains what it's like to have an attractive woman give you a colonic.