Join Tara and Jess well they sip some delicious apple cider, that has a kick (thanks to Jess!) and talk all things Halloween. From their most memorable costumes, to their experiences with ghost stories, to some thoughts on recent spooky movies and documentaries.
As always, Tara and Jess hope you enjoy this episode! It was probably the most fun to record yet.
Here's a list of all the spooky, seasonal, or scary movies we mentioned, if you feel like getting in the spirit! Tell us your favourite October movies in the comments ♥
This episode is a milestone episode because it's our 20th! We are thankful to have wonderful listeners who continue to support us and stream our episodes every week. Thank you for being here!
Please send us any episode requests to lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
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#sharingspookystories #ghosts #costumes
#halloweenspecial #ghosties #hauntedhouses #funnyepisode
#comeforthelaughs #comeforthestories
Join us for an episode request about marriage! Thank you to the person who submitted this request! If you would like to submit your own anonymous episode request, visit our linktree here: https://linktr.ee/lettersforgirlspodcast or send us a message on Instagram: @lettersforgirlspod
Quotes from this episode:
"Values are the foundation for our relationship." - Tara
"Choose to be on the same team." - Jess
We start our chat with Frank Sinatra’s Love and Marriage swirling in our minds (AKA the theme to Married... with Children), and making the discovery that Tara has never seen The Princess Bride!
We discuss making the choice to grow with another person throughout life changes and challenges, and the ways we've done this in our own marriages.
What about continuing to date your partner? We share our favourite ways to date throughout different phases of life. At this stage, Tara loves finding opportunities to dance together or get some movement (like joining local pick-up basketball). Currently Jess is loving making time for lowkey but intentional hangs at home, with no need for baby-sitters!
How about navigating conflict? How can we process changes as individuals and as a couple? Tara shares some of the changes she's been experiencing in recent years, and how it's impacted her marriage. Jess shares her perspective that it is also okay to still love someone, and decide not to stay together. Do what's right for yourself, and your partner.
Tara mentions her obsession with Jefferson Fisher, a communication expert. His Instagram page @jeffersonfisher and his podcast: The Jefferson Fisher Podcast. She also shares the concept of checking in with yourself and others, to know if it is a safe time for a difficult conversation.
***Tara mentions reading about being in fight or flight mode. In the episode she says "parasympathetic" but it is "sympathetic".
References for fight flight mode: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-happens-to-your-body-during-the-fight-or-flight-response
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMFhqbfnIfQ *In this podcast episode Dr. K talks about fight or flight mode, among many other great subjects.*
Tara thinks understanding others should be considered a kind of love language… Jess brings up that knowing and truly seeing someone is the best way to love them, in ways big and small (like knowing how your partner takes their coffee).
Round up of strategies for finding joy & resolving conflict, and additional topics referenced in this episode:
-Ben Platt's song "Grow as we Go" about the ebb and flow of relationships
-Alphabet dates
-Journal prompts together each day as a reflective practice
-Be a thermostat not a thermometer (set the temperature in the room, rather than simply reading & reacting to the temperature)
-Blaming "Susan"
-Come up with the silly pet-names for each other when you ask for something
-Emma Watson’s recent interview on Jay Shetty's “On Purpose” podcast (intimacy is revealing deeper and deeper truths to somebody about yourself over time)
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#marriage #relationships #dating #exercise #fun #hobbies #navigatingmarriage #navigatingrelationships #fighting #intimacy
*Episode Malfunction Alert!: We had an accidental re-release of our first ever episode, our introduction, yesterday on September 22. Feel free to delete it or ignore it. Thanks for your understanding.*
On todays mini.chat, we're discussing some unconventional life tips pulled from a graduation speech. Jess loves a commencement speech once in a while, for a generous dose of idealistic motivation. Today she shared a few points from Tim Minchin’s 2013 speech at the University of Western Australia (linked below if you would like to listen or read the speech in full).
Points discussed:
• “You don’t have to have a dream”
We discuss the idea of being micro-ambitious and our own approaches to living in pursuit of big dreams or the little things in between.
• “Be hard on your opinions” (opinions are like arse-holes)
We chat about the importance of acknowledging nuance. Tara mentions how it's important to her to be introspective and to acknowledge biases and privilege when considering world-issues and different ways of living. Jess brings up the the value in also being open to perspectives that are different from your own.
• “Define yourself by what you love” (be pro-stuff, not just anti-stuff)
Instead of jumping to all the reasons you don’t like something, Jess is trying to work on asking questions about what other people love. (AKA: Don’t yuck someone’s yum!) Tara brings up the longing humans feel for finding a community of like-minded people.
We hope you enjoyed todays chat - talk, soon!
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Content Warning: This letter and episode focuses on women' s intuition, but pregnancy loss is mentioned and discussed.
*Here’s a time stamp to skip the parts of this episode that mention pregnancy loss:
16:00 - 18:56 (A portion of the letter)
20:19 - 32:59 (Tara and Jess’ discussion about pregnancy loss and grief)
What do you do or say when someone you know experiences pregnancy loss or grief? How and when to reach out, or when to give someone space?
Is déjà vu a form of intuition? What about dreams, clairvoyance, and coincidences? We discuss our own perceptions of these concepts and how we interpret them.
Tara shares her experiences with feeling the intuitive need to connect with a friend in a moment they were struggling.
Tara reads an article based on a study about the science behind women's intuition.
Some topics the article mentioned:
-Women's corpus callosum is thicker which allows for better & faster access between the left and right hemisphere of the brain
-Gut acts as your "second brain"
-There are neurotransmitters in the gut
-It's possible to confuse strong emotions for intuition
Jess confronts her own struggles with knowing how to trust her intuition in moments of uncertainty. When is fear of the unknown disguising itself as intuition?
Risky play as a tool for practicing trusting your body... And in turn, a tool for practicing listening to your intuition.
What are other ways we can practice noticing & listening to our intuition? Do we tune out our intuition as we age?
Tara shares how she listens to, and trusts, the signals her body sends her.
We chat about deciding when to defer for input from others, and when to make choices without any outside noise.
Asking your mind, heart and then gut (known as The Head-Heart-Gut Check In) is a helpful exercise that Tara has used several times. Find the link below for that information.
Thank you to Shell for writing this letter.
Miscarriage Information: https://www.jogc.com/article/S1701-2163(24)00545-0/fulltext
Women's Intuition: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-genius-of-empathy/202406/the-neuroscience-of-womens-intuition/amp
The Head-Heart-Gut check in: https://melliobrien.com/the-head-heart-gut-check-in/
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This episode is the first topic request from a listener!
Please send your topic requests to lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
**Tara and Jess will be on holiday for the month of August, 2025, so episodes will be paused for the month. Tune back into the podcast in September. We have some exciting things coming!**
Are you new to parenting? Expecting? Or just want to know more about Tara and Jess' thoughts on parenting in the early days?
You're in the right place.
Tara and Jess received their first topic request via email from a listener who is expecting with their partner. They share their experience and knowledge on the subject, a long with some research and personal preferences.
Topics surrounding babies in the first year that they talked about:
-Tickling
-Touch
-Being soothed by dad/ hearing dad's voice too
-90's TV shows for infants and young children are slower paced, less stimulating than today's cartoons
-Jess' favourite 90's TV shows are: The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, Little Bear. When they're a little bit older Franklin, Miss Rachel (very educational for both parents and kids, but can be stimulating. Jess likes to watch with her kid and interacts during the show!) Mr Rogers, Sherry Louise and Bran. Things with music are great.
-Books: Welcome Baby by Barbara Reid, Welcome to Your World. Jess has a goal to read 1,000 books before age 4.
-Continue reading with your kids for years! Tara used to read to her kids every night at bedtime, they started reading to her and her husband and today they still read to their teenagers periodically. When they get to the age they can read to you, they have so much pride! Content in books sparks a lot of conversation as the kids get older.
-Bedtime routines are important! Kids often like to open up and have conversation at bedtime. So starting those routines when they're really little is helpful to cultivate that safe space for kids.
-Making time for one-on-one connection with your kid(s)
-Talk to your infants even though they don't respond, they can hear you and it's good for their little brains and hearts.
-Bath time: Introduce babies to water slowly, get a little water on their face to prevent fear of water later. Be mindful of temperature, check temperature thresholds online. You can also get a water thermometer for baby bath time.
-Don't be afraid to ask professionals questions for things you're not sure of. No question is stupid.
-Talk with your partner before the baby comes about night time feedings, changes and night time routines so that everyone is on the same page.
-There's only so much you can plan with a baby. Things change and everyone has to adapt.
-Post partum Depression
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK519070/
-Purple crying
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25134950/
Tickle/touch resources: https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/young-infants-have-no-clue-whos-tickling-their-feet
https://research.gold.ac.uk/id/eprint/7309/1/AJBremner_accepted.pdf
https://theconversation.com/do-babies-feel-tickles-in-a-different-way-to-adults-49256
Thank you to the lovely human who sent Tara and Jess an email asking for this episode!
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Welcome to our mini.chat. Today Tara shares about a psychic experience when she was pregnant over fifteen years ago with her first child.
Jess and Tara talk about psychic matters and ghostie experiences.
Have you ever had a psychic or ghostie experience? Write us about it! We'll read it on the pod: lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
Also, let us know: do you think the psychic was right with his guesses/predictions about Tara's baby or do you think it was all just a coincidence?
Comment on this episode, we'd love to hear from you.
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Have you experienced questions or comments on your life-choices from family, friends, or even strangers? External pressures have likely impacted all of us at some point.
Our letter writer is 37, a homeowner, single, and childfree. She is happy with where her life is, and has faith that her life will go the way it’s meant to. She shares her feelings about getting repeatedly questioned on her choices, dating life, and future.
How do we decide which experiences we want to have in life? What do you consider to be truly living a fulfilled life for yourself?
Remember: Just because you're not living the way people expect you to, doesn't mean you're not living a meaningful life.
Jess & Tara share some of the unsolicited questions they have received throughout their adult lives.
How do you know when to ask certain questions? How can we practice not answering questions that make us feel uncomfortable?
Jess recommends considering how well you know someone when asking questions about life & future plans.
Tara considers the difference between a question, and a judgement.
Is it okay to ask specific questions if someone has already opened up the dialogue about their plans?
Topics touched on:
-The movie "The Invention of Lying" with Ricky Gervais
-Being a stay-at-home mom
-Feeling like we have to justify our choices and circumstances, and expecting pressure and certain questions, because it has become the social norm
-If someone asks you a question that you don't want to answer, or makes you uncomfortable, you do not have to answer. Have tools and responses in your back pocket to respond to questions that you don't like. (Check out @dannah_eve to learn about “lie to survive”)
-Online dating, and dating in general. What do we look for when we first meet someone? Attraction? Connection? Laughter? (https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10481040/)
-Social anxiety & making meaningful connections
-Is laser-focusing on something you want, causing you to miss out on some great opportunities?
-How can we be more open to joy? Try naming the things that you like in your immediate space, or look for hearts around you (Mel Robbins - https://www.instagram.com/reel/CZ-ibdmAXVp/?hl=en)
*Take whatever you personally find helpful here and leave the rest.*
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Have you ever felt like being an adult that has it all together is an illusion?
You'd be right.
Our letter writer shares how when she was a kid she thought she'd have life all figured out as an adult, but now as an adult she definitely doesn't. And neither do Jess and Tara.
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-Being an adult and having responsibilities and obligations every day is a challenge.
-Jess shares her childhood fantasy of her family being whisked away to be royals. She would gladly accepted the role of princess.
-Tara shares her current adult fantasy is that when her kids grow up and move out of the house that they want to come around!
Other topics touches on:
-Having a social circle is important for your mental health
-Meal planning
-Using google and Pinterest for recipes
-Looking at chores and household tasks as an on-going to-do list that is never complete (known as the cycle theory)
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/_uyqd2hViGE
https://www.melrobbins.com/episode/episode-99/#10:14
- Tara mentions @beautys.library (Selena's bookish/reader account on Instagram) she started calling her TBR list her hopefuls to take off the pressure of getting to every book on her list every month.
-Jess is working on being more present, taking time for more rest and leaving her phone in a different space.
-Malteesers on popcorn
Tell us your favourite toppings to put on popcorn in the comments!
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Have you ever struggled with anxiety or fear at bedtime?
Our letter writer shares about her experience with this as a kid.
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This week's letter writer shares about her experience with anxiety and fear at bedtime when she was a kid.
Things we discuss within this episode:
-Jess shares about her own struggles with lack of sleep as a mom, and fear of the dark as a kid with an overactive imagination.
-Tara mentions an experience with anxiety and fear at bedtime when she was sick with a concussion as an adult
-Did we watch too many scary movies way too young?
-Are we still scared of the dark as adults? Definitely when we're outside (werewolves out during a full moon are always a risk).
-Jess thinks her stress manifests in her sleep and dreams and she therefore limits watching scary movies now
-Tara thinks she has a super power at night time
-Both hosts share some tools they use to get to sleep at night
-What about using devices before bed? We share our tips for managing our smartphone use to avoid disrupting sleep.
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How do you approach using your social media? How do you navigate it if you have kids?
Tara shares about a story she came across years ago:
The story is about a child's experience with their parent posting their pictures and private information about them on Facebook and how it impacted them. This story had such a profound effect on Tara, that it changed how she posts about her own kids on social media. She asks for her kids' consent before sharing any pictures, and at that, shares very few.
Jess shares her approach to posting about her own child on social media. Most pictures she shares include a profile of her child, or images where her face isn't visible at all.
This conversation brings up a few important questions:
- How can we protect our kids' privacy online when they can't properly advocate for themselves?
-What is an invasion of privacy?
-How will the things we post about our kids now, impact them in the future?
-What does over-sharing online look like?
-Is posting in real-time a good and safe idea?
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Have you ever felt behind in life? This letter writer shares how she felt unprepared for adulthood and still struggles today with feeling unprepared and behind on life.
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Our recurring theme in this episode, is asking, are we all just making it up as we go? Are we ever "all done" with learning? When do we feel confident being our fullest self?
Okay fellow 80s-90s kids, did a lot of our parents avoid or skim over awkward conversations?
Tara acknowledges that it's okay to grieve the childhood you didn't have. It's okay to grieve the parents you were born to.
We chat about personal style. Do most people feel comfortable with their style, or are more of us just making it up as we go? Jess & Tara share their own experiences figuring out style.
Jess mentions how "make-over" shows wouldn't exist if we all understood and embraced our unique styles. How have these shows, like Queer Eye or Wear Whatever the F You Want (What Not to Wear), changed since the 2000s?
How can we outsource our learning? Jess suggests we can turn to our communities and cosmetic store tutorials, maybe hire a stylist. Tara mentions "Being curious is cool." Try replacing jealousy with curiosity. Ask your friends and others that are close to you to teach you what you don't know, but want to know.
Catch up mechanics in video games: needing to master certain skills or collect specific resources to succeed in later levels.
It's never too late to learn a new skill, but it can be incredibly complicated and challenging to "go back to earlier levels," to collect the resources you need to move forward in the direction you want.
Tara questions: Is this struggle mine to carry? Or has it been projected on to me by my caregivers?
Are we ever healed? Or does life require us to continue 'the work', without ever reaching a specific end point, like in a videogame?
"Explore each level while you're in it."
Tara mentions this 10% Happier Podcast about multi-tasking:
Jess mentions how walking can help prevent dementia: https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/walking-linked-to-lower-dementia-risk
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Here are two surprising self-care tips that you maybe haven't considered before.
*Share this episode with a friend that needs some out-of-the-box self care ideas.*
Tara and Jess each share an accessible and free self-care practice that they try to implement in their daily or weekly lives.
Consumer culture tells us that we have to spend money on self care. But Tara and Jess reject that sentiment! It's okay to spend money on self-care treats, but you don't have to.
A couple specific topics touched on:
-What IS self-care?
-Does self-care need to be a big investment of: money, time, energy?
-De-influencers!
-Walking outside first thing in the morning
-Circadian rhythm
-Sunlight on your eyes in the morning
-Theta brain state: https://nhahealth.com/brainwaves-the-language/
-Reciting 3 things you're grateful for (feeling gratitude) when your eyes are still closed when you first wake up in the morning: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_gratitude_changes_you_and_your_brain
https://drjoedispenza.com/dr-joes-blog/the-transformational-power-of-gratitude
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Have you or a loved one received a neurodivergent diagnosis in adulthood? You're not alone!
Our letter writer shares about an autism diagnosis she received in her late 20's. She writes about her journey with getting to know herself, accepting herself and becoming okay with being misunderstood by others.
*Remember to click the subscribe or follow button your podcast app! It tells the app that you like what we're doing.*
Tara and Jess relate to getting a later-in-life neurodivergent diagnosis, and they each share a bit about their own journey.
Tara mentions Dr Gabor Maté's theory on neurodivergence as an interesting piece to add to the conversation.
https://drgabormate.com/adhd/
https://www.melrobbins.com/episode/episode-235/
Jess speculates that a lot of people from generations past have likely been misdiagnosed, or not diagnosed at all, and made it through life not knowing they were neurodivergent.
Tara shares how she always felt a little different growing up and in her 30's ended up with an ADHD diagnosis. She too, is becoming more and more okay with being misunderstood by others.
Understanding neurodivergence allows us to have more compassion for others and their behaviour and how they move through the world!
Jess points out how the majority of research on autism and other neurodivergence is primarily done on white male boys. In general, most health research is done on men and boys. Very limited research is done on women and girls. Depending on your demographic, you can be impacted by different mental and physical health conditions, disabilities and other diagnoses and only have access to certain (or very limited) support and resources.
Advocating for your own mental and physical health is important!
The letter writer references a speech made by a public figure related to autism. Jess expands on what was said in the speech and who said it. She shares some of her own theories surrounding the speech.
No matter if you are neurodivergent, or neurotypical, we are all human! Life is made up of struggles and a lot of joy and happiness. Tara and Jess want to be more mindful of noticing and appreciating joy, and leaning into their unique strengths. They encourage listeners to consider this too!
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Send this episode to a loved one who you think might like to listen!
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Autism Resources:
https://www.autismcanada.org
https://aidecanada.ca
https://autismalliance.ca
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Welcome to our first mini-chat!
Our mini-chats are shorter and more lighthearted episodes.
In this episode Tara and Jess take turns reading listener reviews that have been sent to their DMs or their email.
*Click the follow or subscribe button on your podcast app to tell the app that you like this podcast!*
Tara and Jess are so honoured that the podcast has connected with our listeners, as well as the letters written in by other women. It's fuel to keep moving forward!
They celebrate breaking 100 listens on Spotify and almost reaching a combined 200 listens between Spotify and Apple Podcast. This episode was recorded in early mid May, when they only had four episodes out. Since recording this, they have well surpassed 200 listens! (It's important to celebrate the little wins.)
They share about the concept of mini-chats. Originally the plan was to release these episodes on another day, in addition to Tuesday's weekly episode drops. But they need more letters to create more content to grow the podcast and expand on offerings! So for now, the plan is to sprinkle in mini.chats on Tuesday mornings while rotating between letter episodes and deep dives as well.
Thanks for being here, for listening, and for writing to us!
Stay up to date and know what's coming on their Instagram account: @lettersforgirlspod
Please take a moment to leave a review on your podcast app for Tara and Jess, it means a lot.
Talk soon.
Music credit:
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CONTENT WARNING: This letter and episode mentions abuse and disordered eating. Please be aware before continuing to listen, and feel welcome to skip this episode if needed. Several resources are linked at the bottom of this page. This week we're sharing a letter from "Unparented." Our letter writer reflects on her relationship with her mother, and the challenges she faced throughout her childhood. Follow us on Instagram! @lettersforgirlspod
Jess and Tara share the cycles that they are breaking from their own childhoods, the ways they are trying to parent differently.
Jess shares her techniques for staying present and calm through big emotions or high stress moments, and mentions using singing as a strategy. Shout out to Ms Rachel's "Big Feelings Are Okay."
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10182780/
https://www.singupfoundation.org/about-singing-for-mental-health/understanding-singing-for-mental-health/singing-health#:~:text=Singing%20lowers%20cortisol%20and%20relieves,lowers%20stress%20and%20anxiety%20levels.
We discuss what we're choosing to embrace and trying to repeat for our own kids.
Our parents were doing the best with the tools they had at the time, and that not wanting to repeat cycles doesn't diminish the value of all the the things they got right.
We discuss how we reparent ourselves by feeding your inner child with joy (and snacks), picturing your childhood self, or being the parent to "little you."
Tara shares some of her tools for reparenting herself including being mindful of her thoughts, welcoming in her emotions and noticing the mind-body connection between emotions and stress and how they can be felt in the body.
Tara references the quote: "I allow my fear to live and breathe and stretch out its legs comfortably. It seems to me that the less I fight my fear, the less it fights back. If I can relax, fear relaxes, too. In fact, I cordially invite fear to come along with me everywhere I go.” - Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
Reparenting references: https://cptsdfoundation.org/2020/07/27/reparenting-to-heal-the-wounded-inner-child/
https://acawso.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/REPARENTING-1-10.pdf
https://positivepsychology.com/reparenting/
Jess mentions the movie, Inside Out (2015).
Jess mentions the movie, "My Old Ass" (2024) written and directed by Megan Park, as a fun way to jump into the idea of "reparenting" yourself.
Tara shares stats on family violence and abuse from Statistics Canada, and disordered eating, linked below.
Tara shares a quote about feeling mothered by so many women throughout her life from @marriageandmartini on Instagram.
Abuse resources:
https://www.un.org/en/coronavirus/what-is-domestic-abuse
https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/health-promotion/stop-family-violence/services.html
https://rcmp.ca/en/relationship-violence/intimate-partner-violence-and-abuse
https://www.domesticshelters.org/en-ca/domestic-abuse-help-in-canada
https://ccfwe.org/find-help-across-canada/
https://littlewarriors.ca/about/information-resources/regional-resources/ontario-resources/
https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/231121/dq231121b-eng.htm
Eating disorder Resources:
https://ontario.cmha.ca/documents/understanding-and-finding-help-for-eating-disorders/
Music credit:
Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-day
License code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9
Follow us us on Instagram: @lettersforgirlspod
Have you struggled with making friends in adulthood? Or noticed you've been attracting friendships that don't feel like a good fit for you?
Listen to this follow up to episode 1 (The Right Relationships Feel Effortless) which explored a letter submitted to us about how to recognise the right relationships throughout life. If you haven't listened to that first episode, maybe go back and have a listen!
*Remember to click the subscribe button! It tells the app that the content we're putting out there is valuable and important.*
In this deep dive, Tara and Jess talk about how they met, how they've struggled at points in their adulthood to make positive female friendships for different reasons, and strategies that they use now to develop and navigate new friendships.
Jess mentions that there a lot of resources available and different ways for people to make friends. Here are some of them that we know of:
• Bumble For Friends (BFF mode - if you already use Bumble, you can toggle between modes on the app!)
• Timeleft (sets you up with 5 strangers that you have things in common with, for a Wednesday night dinner at a restaurant - available in 60 countries and 300 cities)
• Gofrendly (founded by two like-minded strangers that met for a coffee while searching for friendship, and created an app to helps women make new friends and build meaningful connections)
*As always, be careful online and make sure you're safe. Make sure you tell someone before meeting strangers and always meet in a public place. As a general rule, don't go to a strangers house alone! When Jess first went to bookclub hosted at someone's house, she had her sister-in-law with her and when Tara went to writer's club, it was in a public setting and her husband knew the address of where she was and how long she'd be gone for.*
Tara and Jess chat about how joining a local club doing an activity or sport that you enjoy is a great to meet people with the same interests–it is, after all, how they met!
Showing up when you're not 100%. Tara shares how she is making an effort to show up when she's having an off day, or only feeling like she's operating at 30%, because she's leaning into friendships and being honest about how she's feeling. No one feels 100% everyday. Only you can decide what is best for you.
Brené Brown's strategy with her husband and how they navigate day-to-day in their marriage, in their household and as parents:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfL4RTuC9Bk
Mel Robbins shares some tips on how she builds friendships
and stays in connection.
https://www.melrobbins.com/episode/episode-82/
You can send us your letters at lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
Music credit: Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-day
License code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9
Have you ever loved someone, but they bullied you? Did you feel stuck, or have tools that you felt confident using to navigate the situation? Did you have someone to turn to for help?
This episode we are reading a letter from a writer whose childhood best friend, was also her bully. Their relationship started when she was only six-years-old, and continued for eight years. She navigated the friendship with the knowledge she had at the time, but the relationship was hard on her. The school system made it even more challenging. School never felt like a safe place for our writer, but it was for her bully.
Tara and Jess talk about some ideas on how we can make public schools a safer place for everyone, including the importance of prioritizing mental health, and having access to counsellors.
Parents and caregivers can do a lot to make home safe, so that kids feel they have a trusted adult to turn to for help.
Jess highlights the importance of voting, it makes a difference.
Tara shares how the school system is still operating from it's original framework from almost 200 years ago. https://www.thecanadianencyclopedia.ca/en/article/history-of-education#:~:text=The%20leading%20figure%20in%20Ontario,which%20the%20school%20promoter%20functioned.
Jess share about reaching out to old friends and the positive impact it can have.
Tara shares about a harmful female friendship. She also opens up about not always being the kindest friend when she was younger and how she reached out to an old friend to apologize and to own her behaviour and struggles.
Jess shares about her husband being bullied when he was younger, and then became the bully in turn.
A big thank you to our letter writer for sharing her story with us!
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Music credit:Music from #Uppbeathttps://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-dayLicense code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9
Surprise Episode drop in celebration of our Podcast Releasing!
Have you ever experienced a time in your life where you had to make intentional changes? This Letter Writer shares her thoughts on "Burning it down" to make positive shifts in her life and to seek growth from the struggle.
Write to us! Tell us about a time you went through a big transition or change and send it to lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
Tara and Jess talk about what burning it down means to them. Is it external factors? Internal factors? Both? Jess shares about a transition she's currently experiencing and how she's trying to own who she is.
Tara shares about working with and being aware of, her life-long self-limited mindset. While Jess shares a neat strategy to practice seeing herself as if she is viewing someone else.
Tara shares her understanding of what the dark night of the soul is and a time she experienced it. She also touches on the loss she experienced, the internal work she did to heal from that scary and challenging time and the post-traumatic growth that came after.
Jess shares about the history of witches and how the term was used to make women fear getting education and used to control them.
Your heart is your guide – a powerful message from our letter writer, Karena. Tara shares how she's been trying to tune in to her internal messages and truth more and expands on a strategy she learned from Melli Obrien about tuning in to make decisions:
https://melliobrien.com/the-head-heart-gut-check-in/
Jess talks about the line "watch the flames light the path" from our letter writer. Rather than focusing on what is potentially lost, let the light that is created guide you to where you should be.
Which leads us to this podcast and its creation–where is it going to take us?! We're open and leaning in to whatever happens.
Thank you to our letter writer, Karena!!
If you'd like to write to us, email us at lettersforgirlspodcast@gmail.com
Follow us on Instagram: @lettersforgirlspod
Talk soon!
Music credit:
Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-day
License code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9
Have you ever struggled with relationships that feel forced or struggled to make friends as an adult? Tune in to hear Kirsten's letter on relationships, our own experiences, and how we approach some of these struggles. Since talking it out usually helps, if you want to share about a relationship experience you've had, write to us about it!
Send your own letter to lettersforgirls.submissions@gmail.com
A couple things we referenced in this episode:
“You are the love of your life. And I think that when you start with yourself; loving yourself, creating boundaries, advocating for yourself, being honest with yourself, not being so good that you’re not being honest, you know, especially as a woman, then I think everything grows from there. It is the greatest seed you can plant in the world to create great friendships and relationships. Is to love yourself.” –Viola Davis
Mel Robbins Let Them theory, link to her podcast: https://www.melrobbins.com/podcast
Link to an episode where she introduces the Let Them Theory: https://www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/episode-226
Tara shares about a journaling practice she engages with as an adult that she wishes she could've used as a tool to get to know and understand herself better as a teenager. See our Instagram page @lettersforgirlspod for more journal prompts
Jess references a poem about friendship: "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." –Brian A. Drew Chalker
And vintage Taylor Swift, "The Best Day"
Some friendships come to an end, and even though its often what naturally happens, it can still be really hard.
We chat about love languages and how they can help us understand the people in our lives, and even ourselves, better.
Tara reflects on a surface-level, non-reciprocal friendship she had in her early thirties and her take-aways from it.
Jess shares how she moved to a new town and how this impacted her social life and relationships as an adult relocating.
We recognize that as adults we don't have to be new at many things, we develop comfort zones and try to avoid failing at anything. Maybe it's time for us all to try being new at something and be open to where that adventure takes us.
Thank you so much to our letter writer, Kirsten!
We hope you all enjoy this conversation about relationships.
Let us know in a review what you thought about it.
Talk soon!
*Friends! Please bear with us as we learn the ins and outs of recording. We promise audio quality will get better as we build on our skill and equipment.*
Music credit: Today is the Day by Mark July
Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-day
License code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9
*Friends! Please bear with us as we learn the ins and outs of recording. We promise audio quality will get better as we build on our skill and equipment.*
Meet Tara and Jess, the hosts of the Letters for Girls Podcast, as they share a little bit about themselves and how they came up with the podcast concept, why they decided to pursue building a podcast, and what the hope listeners will gain from the experience.
First episode drops April 29th, 2025!!
Follow us on Instagram: @lettersforgirlspod
Music from #Uppbeat
https://uppbeat.io/t/mark-july/today-is-the-day
License code: PR8M0SMSX51KSUG9