"We all have needs, right? They're not selfish. They're not wrong, and they are not a weakness. They're part of being human." This solo episode dives into something that quietly shapes our emotions, choices, and relationships - unmet needs.
Many of our adult struggles stem from basic human requirements that went unfulfilled, often dating back to childhood. If you grew up in a home where safety felt uncertain, you may carry a deeper need for security. If you were only praised for achievements, you may hunger for recognition and validation. If expressing needs was labeled selfish, you may struggle with autonomy or even resting without guilt.
I share Sarah's story - a successful woman who looked like she had it all together but came to me exhausted and resentful. As a parentified child, she learned that being loved meant serving others first. Her healing began when she named her unmet need: "I need recognition for who I am, not just what I do."
The episode explores five common unmet needs: safety and security, belonging and connection, recognition and validation, autonomy and freedom, and rest and nourishment. For each, I offer practical ways to respond with self-compassion rather than shame.
"What we name, we can nurture," I remind listeners. Unmet needs aren't flaws - they're signposts pointing toward healing. The path forward requires self-awareness, honest communication, self-compassion, and the willingness to seek support.
Your needs are valid, and meeting them with gentleness is an act of self-love.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"Your whole being is saying nope, nope, nope, not right now." Sound familiar? This solo episode dives into something we all experience - that moment when we know change would be good for us, but we find ourselves resisting it anyway.
Resistance isn't failure or brokenness. It's often a sign you're on the right track; your system just hasn't caught up yet. After noticing this pattern with clients, friends, and colleagues lately, I felt called to explore why we resist the very growth we're seeking.
I break down three core reasons resistance shows up in our lives. First, growth threatens our familiar identity - even when our old self isn't happy, it's what we know. I share the story of a client who'd been the family "fixer" for decades and felt deep unease when setting boundaries because she didn't know who she'd be without that role.
Second, change disrupts our sense of safety and control. Our survival brain screams "danger" at the unknown, even when our conscious mind wants the change. I get vulnerable about staying in unfulfilling situations because "the pain I knew felt safer than the uncertainty of change."
Third, growth forces us to face discomfort we've been avoiding - grief, anger, shame, hurt. I share how my own resistance to forgiveness work was actually protection from decades of suppressed emotions.
Each reason comes with a gentle reframe to help you move forward with self-compassion rather than self-judgment. Because resistance isn't a stop sign - it's a signal that your system is adjusting.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
What happens when profound love meets devastating loss? My guest Kathryn Henry, author of "A Dime to Say I Love You," shares her transformative journey through grief after losing her wife Lisa to cancer.
After a successful corporate career leading global teams at Lululemon, Gap, and Levi Strauss, Kathryn stepped away to honor a promise to her late wife: to live fully, love deeply, and tell the truth of her experience. Her memoir is a raw, honest account of how walking through illness and death became a profound spiritual awakening.
"The profound nature of that and what ensued beyond that opened my aperture of life so much more," Kathryn reflects on Lisa's transition. Through their journey together, they discovered that love doesn't end with death - it transforms.
One of the most powerful concepts we explore is AFGO - Another F*cking Growth Opportunity - a phrase that became their healing tool for reframing life's hardest moments. "It was a healing tool for us," Kathryn shares. "It helped us to recontextualize something and shift ourselves from a perspective of victim to a perspective of owning what was happening."
We delve into "dime moments" - unexpected appearances of dimes that bring presence and connection to something beyond the visible world. These moments teach us that the present is the only place we can truly operate from.
This conversation offers profound insights on using grief as a catalyst for transformation, the power of forgiveness in healing, and how love continues to show up in the most unexpected ways.
More info and links:
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
Sometimes the most profound transformations emerge from our deepest wounds. Today I welcome life coach Louisa Hext, whose story of resilience will stop you in your tracks and remind you that healing is always possible.
Louisa's journey began with a beautiful friendship - helping an elderly man named Gordy with daily tasks, groceries, and companionship. What started as genuine care and connection became a decade-long nightmare when she was falsely accused of financial exploitation after his death. Despite having only received $300 monthly for gas and time, she faced felony charges and the choice between prison or a plea bargain that would forever change her life.
"I could have all of this love for someone else or compassion for someone else, but I didn't have it for me," Louisa shares with raw honesty about her healing journey. Through therapy, inner child work, and learning to love the six-year-old version of herself, she slowly rebuilt her sense of self-worth.
The most powerful moment? Last year, after almost a decade, Louisa successfully obtained an expungement - having her record sealed forever. When she called to share this victory, she was surprised by her own flat emotions. As I reminded her, "Your body is letting go of the grief because it could finally let go after holding on for so long."
This conversation explores the intersection of shame, resilience, and the courage required to reclaim your story. It's a masterclass in forgiveness - not just of others, but of ourselves.
More info and links:
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"I'm smart, I can figure it out at work, but not at home. I know better - why do I keep choosing the wrong people?" If this sounds familiar, you're not alone, and this episode is exactly what you need to hear.
Trauma bonds are like emotional glue that keeps you connected to someone who's not good for you through cycles of hurt, apology, and reconciliation. They feel like love, but they're actually your body responding to something familiar - even when it's not safe or healthy.
The truth is, being smart or strong doesn't make you immune. In fact, the traits that make you successful can make you more vulnerable. You're a problem solver who sees emotional distance as a challenge to overcome. You've normalized emotional labor and giving the benefit of the doubt. Most damaging of all, the pattern feels familiar because if love was inconsistent growing up, your nervous system learned that connection comes with uncertainty.
I share my own experience from my third marriage - my "awakener" relationship where I was caught in cycles of warm attention followed by complete shutdown. When he pulled away, I felt anxious and had to fix it. When he came back, it felt like relief, like the sun coming out. I told myself we were "passionate," but really, my nervous system was hooked on those highs and lows.
This episode includes five signs you might be in a trauma bond and five concrete steps to break free, including the science behind why these patterns are so addictive and healing.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"I told myself it would be different this time." Sound familiar? Despite being strong and self-aware, many of us find ourselves caught in the same painful relationship patterns over and over again - not because we're broken, but because our inner world is repeating what it learned long ago.
In this vulnerable episode, I share my own journey through multiple toxic relationships, including my third marriage where I ignored every red flag because I saw "potential." The wake-up call came when my therapist told me: "Brenda, love isn't like Hollywood movies. It's not supposed to be about intensity."
I explore five telltale signs you're caught in a toxic relationship cycle: always doing the emotional labor, confusing chaos with love, ignoring red flags for potential, shrinking yourself to keep peace, and ending up in the same dynamics with different people. As my AA sponsor bluntly told our group: "Any relationship based on potential is fucked."
Through my forgiveness work, I discovered my core belief: "Any man that I love will choose another woman or something over me." This pattern played out repeatedly until I could see it and heal it.
The empowering truth? You can rewrite your story. I share five practical ways to break these cycles, from validating your experience to choosing peace over familiar chaos. Remember: "Real love doesn't ask you to shrink. It celebrates your wholeness."
If you're ready to stop repeating the same painful patterns and create the healthy love you deserve, this episode offers both understanding and hope.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
What if being "too nice" is actually a form of self-abandonment? This question stopped me cold as I caught myself saying "yes" to yet another request while my body screamed "I can't take one more thing."
Sound familiar? Between construction chaos at home, my husband's health issues, challenging client calls, and a friend needing support, I found myself pouring from an empty vessel once again. It's that moment when we smile and agree while everything inside us protests - and I realized this pattern runs deeper than just being helpful.
Self-abandonment happens when we dismiss our own needs, emotions, or truth to avoid discomfort - ours or someone else's. We become emotional caretakers of others at the cost of ourselves, and that's not kindness - it's depletion.
"Boundaries aren't about keeping people out. They're about keeping yourself in your own integrity."
Through stories of clients like Beth and Linda, I explore how childhood programming creates these patterns. We learn that love is earned through being agreeable, that "good girls don't say no," and that boundaries somehow equal meanness. But here's what changed everything for my clients: "Love that demands emotional neglect isn't love. It's obligation."
In this episode, I share practical boundary scripts, five steps to reclaim your voice, and why real kindness must include you. As I tell my clients: "Real kindness includes you. If it excludes your needs, it's not being nice and it's not kindness. It's performance."
Remember, when you stop betraying yourself to make others comfortable, you begin a powerful journey of self-loyalty and sovereignty. And that, my friend, feels liberating.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"Now I get to be unscripted. Now I get to be authentic. Now I get to practice all these things that I really help other people with on a deeper layer."
Sometimes the universe orchestrates exactly what we need when we need it most. As I navigate the ongoing grief of my husband's dementia journey, my home decided to reveal its own hidden wounds - dry rot behind bedroom windows, black mold in his old office, and deteriorating siding that needed complete replacement.
What started as routine window repairs became a profound metaphor for my own reconstruction process. Just as the workers discovered years of hidden damage behind beautiful facades, I found myself facing three and a half days of guttural loneliness that had been buried for decades. "I have felt lonely even in a room full of people, feeling like I didn't fit in, feeling like I was different," I share with raw honesty.
Through this vulnerable exploration, I recognize how busyness became my lifelong distraction from these deep feelings. Years of people-pleasing, external validation seeking, and maintaining personas that kept me safe but hidden from my true self. The timing wasn't lost on me - as new windows were installed to change how I see the world and how the world sees me, I was simultaneously shedding old ways of being.
This episode is about choosing authenticity over performance, connection over hiding, and the courage to be unscripted in a world that often rewards facades. It's my invitation for you to examine what might be hidden behind your own beautiful exterior and to consider what reconstruction your soul might be calling for.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
What do dry rot and black mold have to do with emotional healing?
In this deeply personal episode, Brenda shares a surprising discovery during a simple home repair that revealed something hidden—not just in her walls, but in her heart. As black mold and decay were uncovered behind her windows, Brenda realized she had also been carrying hidden emotional toxins: long-ignored sadness, quiet loneliness, and deep unworthiness.
Using her signature marine analogy, Brenda reflects on how our outer world often mirrors what we suppress inside—and how powerful healing happens when we finally make space for what we've avoided.
Tune in for a story of emotional release, self-forgiveness, and the courage to feel.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
What if your ego wasn’t something to fight, but something to understand?
In this episode, Dr. Shawdy joins us for a rich conversation about how the ego develops, why it gets triggered, and what it needs in order to relax. We talk about the early wounds that shape it and how those patterns can continue to influence us in adulthood.
We also explore the power of forgiveness and what it looks like to truly live a forgiving life. Dr. Shawdy shares insights on self-acceptance, especially when it comes to the parts of ourselves we often try to hide or fix.
Throughout the conversation, we look at how curiosity and playfulness can support healing. You’ll hear why it helps to approach yourself with a mindset of discovery rather than judgment, and how engaging with your inner child can lead to growth and a deeper sense of connection.
If you’ve ever felt stuck in old patterns or unsure how to move forward, this episode offers clarity, warmth, and a fresh perspective.
Press play for a conversation that will help you see ego, forgiveness, and self-awareness in a new light.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"It's never too late to find your voice so that you can heal and live your best life."
What happens when a 13-year-old girl's life is shattered by unimaginable violence, yet she emerges decades later as a beacon of hope and healing? My guest today, Madeleine Black, embodies the profound truth that it's not what happens to us, but how we choose to respond that defines our lives.
Madeleine's journey from victim to survivor to thriver began when she made a powerful decision: "If I never become a mum, then they've won." This became her "best revenge" – living fully and authentically despite the trauma that tried to silence her forever.
Through our conversation, Madeleine reveals how forgiveness became her path to freedom, though not in the way you might expect. As she beautifully explains: "I realized that I don't really have anything to forgive myself for. But for years I felt I brought it on myself... 100% of all rapes without a doubt are caused by rapists. Nothing else."
Her story isn't just about surviving sexual violence – it's about the courage to find your voice, the patience required for healing, and the profound impact that sharing our stories can have on others. Madeleine's work as the "Courage Cultivator" reminds us that courage is contagious, and sometimes hearing one person's brave story gives us permission to heal our own wounds.
Whether you've experienced trauma or simply need a reminder of the resilience that lives within us all, this conversation offers hope, practical wisdom, and the gentle reminder that it's never too late to reclaim your voice and live your best life.
More info and links:
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"What if the most profound form of intimacy isn't about being with another, but it's about being fully present and rigorously honest with yourself?"
Today, I invite you to explore a different kind of intimacy – the profound connection you can cultivate with yourself. Playing on the word "intimacy" as "Into-Me-See," I share how true self-knowledge becomes the foundation for authentic living and healthier relationships.
For high-achieving women, the pursuit of external validation often masks a disconnection from our own needs, desires, and sense of self-worth. We climb mountains without celebrating achievements, keep ourselves busy performing rather than truly being seen, and look everywhere except within for fulfillment.
I share the story of Linda, a successful entrepreneur who appeared to have everything together but felt empty inside, constantly seeking validation from her partner, team, and friends. Through a simple mirror exercise – sitting with herself and asking "What am I afraid to see when I look into myself?" – she began connecting more deeply with herself and needing less validation from others.
Using the intimacy metaphor, I guide you through three powerful concepts: looking honestly in the mirror at all parts of yourself, recognizing the armor you wear (achievements, perfectionism, people-pleasing) that shields you from true self-connection, and embracing your shadow – those aspects you hide, deny, or judge.
The profound truth is that when we're deeply connected with ourselves, accepting both strengths and flaws, we no longer seek others to complete us. This allows us to show up in relationships as whole, authentic beings capable of giving and receiving love without hidden agendas or unrealistic expectations.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"Letting go is not about erasing memory. It's about loosening the grip on the belief that others' words define you."
Welcome, I’d like to invite you to explore what "letting go" really means beyond the social media platitudes and catchy phrases. As someone who used to be frustrated by the vague advice to "just let it go," I understand how unhelpful that phrase can be without context or practical guidance.
I take you deeper into understanding that true liberation comes not from ignoring or bypassing our feelings, but from releasing our attachment to external validation and others' opinions of us. This isn't about pretending we're okay or erasing painful memories – it's about loosening our grip on the belief that others' opinions define our worth.
Drawing from personal experiences and conversations with friends, I explore how often what hurts us isn't really about us at all. When someone projects their pain onto us, we have a choice about whether to carry that burden or release it.
Throughout the episode, I share three practical steps to begin this letting-go practice: acknowledging where you're seeking approval, shifting focus to self-affirmation, and reframing rejection as an opportunity for growth. Each step is accompanied by reflective questions to help you identify where external validation might be keeping you emotionally tethered.
I emphasize that letting go is not a one-time event but a moment-by-moment practice of creating space for true self-acceptance. Whether you're seeking validation in your work, relationships, appearance, or social media presence, this episode offers gentle guidance to reclaim your power and reconnect with your inner voice.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
Download your free companion resource to this episode here: Forgiving Your Mother Worksheet
"Our mothers are often our first mirror. The way they spoke to us, touched us, showed up or did not show up leaves lasting imprints."
Today, I explore the tender territory of mother-daughter relationships just in time for Mother's Day. Rather than focusing on cards and flowers, I invite you into a deeper conversation about what it truly means to forgive your mother as an adult.
As someone who's navigated my own complicated maternal relationship, I understand that Mother's Day can evoke a spectrum of emotions – from gratitude to grief, from love to resentment. Our mothers are often our first mirrors, and the ways they spoke to us, showed up (or didn't) created lasting imprints that shape our self-perception.
For many women, these early experiences translate into patterns of people-pleasing, perfectionism, and the persistent fear of being "too much" or "not enough." Throughout the episode, I share my personal journey of having been a parentified daughter who lacked guidance, safety, and encouragement – offering validation for listeners struggling with similar wounds.
I guide you through five transformative steps toward forgiveness: acknowledging the impact, humanizing your mother's story without excusing the hurt, feeling your emotions safely, setting appropriate boundaries, and reclaiming your own narrative. Each step is illustrated with personal examples and practical guidance.
This episode includes a guided moment to connect with your inner child and healing journal prompts to continue your journey. Remember, forgiving your mother isn't about dismissing your pain or forcing reconciliation – it's about choosing peace for yourself, at your own pace, in whatever way honors your emotional safety and well-being.
Click here to download the Forgiving Your Mother Worksheet, a guided tool to help you explore your feelings, reflect on your experiences, and take meaningful steps toward emotional freedom.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"When your self worth depends upon the approval of others, you give away your power."
In today's episode, I dive deep into a struggle I know intimately well – the exhausting cycle of seeking external validation and approval from others. As someone who spent years over-performing, people-pleasing, and silencing my own needs just to earn a nod of approval, I understand the toll this takes on our emotional well-being and sense of self.
I explore how our self-worth often becomes tangled in others' opinions, especially in today's world of social media validation, turning us into emotional yo-yos – high when approved of, low when criticized or ignored. The truth is, when our worth depends on someone else's opinion, we give away our power and lose touch with our authentic selves.
Throughout the episode, I share personal stories of how this approval-seeking showed up in my relationships and work, leaving me constantly striving yet never feeling enough. I outline clear signs to help you identify if you're caught in this validation trap – including anxiety without feedback, constant comparison, fear of expressing real thoughts, and achievements that feel empty.
Most importantly, I offer a practical, four-step approach to breaking free: identifying limiting core beliefs, practicing self-compassion, reclaiming your inner voice, and building self-trust. These steps are complemented by actionable tools including powerful affirmations, journaling prompts, mindfulness practices, and transformative questions to reconnect with your authentic self.
This episode is your invitation to stop chasing approval and start embracing the beautiful truth that you are inherently worthy – not because of what you achieve or who approves, but simply because you exist.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"You don't need permission to be powerful. You don't need to apologize for showing up as you are. Your voice matters. And it's time the world hears your voice clearly and confidently."
In this empowering episode, I introduce the No Sorry Challenge – a simple yet transformative 24-hour commitment to stop saying "sorry" unless it's truly warranted. As someone who's navigated my own journey from constant apologizing to confident communication, I understand how this small word can undermine our presence and power.
We've all caught ourselves saying "sorry to bother you" or "sorry, can I just ask something?" – phrases that subtly communicate we don't deserve to take up space. I explore why we develop this habit (especially women), how it shapes others' perceptions of us, and most importantly, how to break free from it.
This episode isn't just about information – it's an invitation to action. I provide practical alternatives to replace those reflexive apologies: transforming "sorry to bother you" into "do you have a moment?", and "sorry for taking your time" into "thank you for your time."
Beyond the words themselves, I delve into the mindset shift required to truly stand in your power. This challenge isn't about being rude or dismissive – it's about recognizing your inherent worth and communicating with clarity and confidence.
Whether you're recovering from people-pleasing tendencies or simply want to strengthen your communication skills, this challenge offers a concrete way to practice self-worth in everyday interactions. Remember, you don't need permission to be powerful – your voice matters, and it's time the world hears it clearly and confidently.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
“If you feel like you're at rock bottom and you've hit a wall and you have nowhere else to go, it's actually an exciting place to be." - Coach Sara
Today, I welcome kindred spirit Sara Olson—artist, author, and empowerment coach—who shares her transformative journey from pain to purpose through the healing powers of forgiveness and creative expression.
Our conversation flows naturally into deep waters as Sara reveals how facing herself in the mirror—literally and figuratively—became the foundation for both her personal healing and her approach to helping others. Her story of setting a timer for five minutes to look in the mirror and say "I love you" (while naked, no less!) demonstrates the raw vulnerability required for genuine transformation.
What makes this episode special is Sara's unique approach to healing through intuitive art. She shares the powerful story of how painting six deeply emotional pieces helped her process grief and heartbreak, eventually leading to her innovative coaching approach that combines creative expression with emotional healing.
Throughout our conversation, we explore themes close to my heart: the courage to face yourself despite your flaws, learning to find beauty in painful experiences, and discovering freedom through self-compassion. Sara's insights for single parents and those hitting rock bottom come from authentic lived experience, making her guidance both practical and deeply empathetic.
Whether you're struggling to forgive yourself, facing life transitions, or simply yearning to reconnect with your creative spirit, this conversation offers gentle wisdom and practical tools to help you rise from your own ashes and discover the beauty waiting on the other side of pain.
Coach Sara’s Website and Links:
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"There's a big difference between saying sorry for hurting someone and saying sorry for just existing."
In this heartfelt episode, I explore the deeply ingrained habit of over-apologizing – something many of us do without even realizing it. Drawing from both personal experience and historical context, I unpack why women in particular tend to say "I'm sorry" when we've done nothing wrong.
Have you ever apologized for asking a question, for taking up space, or even when someone else bumped into you? This pattern isn't just a personality quirk – it's rooted in generations of societal conditioning that taught women to be agreeable, accommodating, and passive.
I trace this conditioning from Victorian expectations of women as "moral guardians" to post-World War II pressure to return to submissive roles, to modern media portrayals that still subtly reinforce these patterns. This historical perspective helps us understand why assertive women are often labeled "aggressive" while men displaying identical behavior are seen as "confident."
"We teach people how to treat us. When we over-apologize, we teach others that our very presence requires forgiveness."
Throughout the episode, I connect over-apologizing to deeper issues of low self-esteem, fear of conflict, and people-pleasing tendencies. Most importantly, I offer practical steps to break this habit: building awareness by tracking your apologies, replacing "sorry" with empowering alternatives, practicing assertiveness, and surrounding yourself with supportive people.
The goal isn't to never apologize – it's to save our apologies for when they're truly warranted. By making this simple yet profound shift in our communication, we can transform not just how others perceive us, but how we see ourselves. Remember: you deserve to take up space without apology.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
In today's episode, I'm sharing e the importance of starting the new year with a clean slate and how to transform perceived mistakes into valuable lessons that propel us forward. We'll dive into a powerful process for identifying and working through regrets, offering you practical and spiritual insights to release what holds you back. Grab a pen and paper as we walk through steps to shift your perspective on regret, rewrite your story, and embrace growth with compassion. Whether you're striving for peace in personal relationships or professional life, this episode is a step toward turning your pain into purpose. Let's get started!
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
"When you love someone with all your heart and you have dreams and plans and you share these little secrets, right? You have these little code words and they're your person, they're the ones that you call when you see something funny or you have these little symbols, you have these inside jokes, you have these plans and these dreams that are gone, taken out right from underneath you. The rug pulled out. You had no say in it.”
Today, I share my profound reflections on the past year since my husband, Doug, moved into memory care. As I recount the heart-wrenching, gut-wrenching, and transformative experiences of navigating dementia, I hope to offer solace and understanding to those in similar situations.
Join me as I delve into the emotional turmoil, the difficult decisions, and the invaluable lessons I've learned along the way. We'll also discuss the importance of asking for help, finding compassionate support, and ultimately, turning pain into peace.
This episode is a heartfelt message to anyone struggling with a loved one's dementia, affirming that you are not alone and you matter. Get ready to embark on a powerful journey of empathy, rage, love, and hope.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
Brenda’s Website/Links
