The TOP FIVE EPISODES, as voted for by YOU, the listeners of Ecumenical Matters. Lindsay Mitchell and Glenn Hamill take us through the Contenders we picked throughout the run of the podcast and have been voted on over two months by the public.
Find out what fans think the best Father Ted episodes are, and let us know if you agree!
IT'S CHRISTMAS! So naturally it's Golden Cleric time on Craggy Island!
Dirty Words members Colin Hassard and Ashley Manners get trapped with Ted and Dougal in the Largest Lingerie Department in Ireland. Mrs Doyle gets a new, mechanical nemesis and Jack prepares for his own awards.
Writers and producers Muireann McGinty and Dee Harvey dream big in the final ever episode of Father Ted! 😢
After talking Tommy Tiernan off a ledge at a priest's convention Ted is seduced by visions of a glamourous life in America, but can he really leave Craggy Island and it's inhabitants behind?
The episode takes a reflective tone towards the end, and we discuss Kevin Spacey's relative anonymity in 1998, the draw of Magic America and Radiohead: depressing or not?
Kiel Cathers, lead singer of folk rock behemoths The Logues wards off the huddled masses of Eoin McLove fans in this hilarious send up of Daniel O’Donnell.
Mrs Doyle is besotted when she wins a competition to have her beloved TV host Eoin McLove visit her, but she's not the only one on the island who wants to meet him. Dougal thinks he's very cheeky, Ted doesn't approve of his poetry tastes and Jack waxes lyrical on the nature of fandom.
We also talk about treacherous male bonding games such as Eyeball Chicken and Killerball, fainting Michael Jackson fans and false rumours about Pope John Paul II.
LIVE EPISODE! We broadcast live from the Fenderesky Gallery on Belfast's North Street during Culture Night Belfast 2016 in front of an adorning audience and streamed to Facebook Live. All with the obligatory Craggy Island production values!
After losing the bet to Dick Byrne in the Over 75s Football Challenge in the last episode, Ted has to kick Bishop Brennan up the arse to satisfy his forfeit. Dougal is on hand to document the kicking with photographic evidence, while Jack and Mrs Doyle have their own way of dealing with the world's most sarcastic priest.
Another Road Show! This time to Mexico. Well south of the (Ireland/UK) border in Letterkenny. Ted is embroiled in a high stakes bet with his hated rival Dick Byrne in the Annual All-Priests 5-a-Side Over 75 Indoor Football Challenge Match.
Dougal's on a career break from being physio, in order to protect the corner flags. Jack downs a full bottle of Dreamy Sleepy Nighty Snoozy Snooze (banned in most European countries, so you know it's good), while Mrs Doyle rounds up a firm of fellow football converts for the terraces.
We also discuss Amazon's toilet roll delivery service, lying in a confessional and there's a host of expertise offered by self-proclaimed Bikram Yoga Expert, Sean Treanor.
I don't believe it! Twenty episodes, so celebrate with actor Glenn Hamill and Vince! The Islanders take a day trip to the Mainland, despite Mrs Doyle's misgivings.
Ted and Dougal spot Victor Meldrew from One Foot in the Grave, but learn very quickly that you should never meet your heroes. A hasty exit sends them to a sojourn into the Very Dark Caves, where they run into Noel Furlong. Mrs Doyle argues over a cheque and Jack's eyesight deceives him.
We discuss the etiquette of Irish fighting, what made Bruce Willis a miserable scrote and we have a very deep (and controversial) discussion about the nature of offensive humour
Actor, writer and improv artist Michael Keane is at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, cowering from the menace of the Beast in this terrifying mystery episode.
Ted's got in over his head, betting the entire heating allowance on Chris winning the King of the Sheep 1998, but Chris artistic temperament has been put askew by the howling of the beast. Everything is a bit askew as Mrs Doyle finally gets to use the sheep tea, Dougal takes up shoplifting and Jack temporarily feels the serenity of a leap year.
We also delve into running the numbers at weddings, extreme artistic temperament, Yeats quotes and Tropical Birds in South East London. Fuckin' 'ell.
Belfast Comedy Writers Johnny Nicholl and Jonathan McCoy watch Ted insult a sixth of the world's population when he tries to impersonate a Chinese person. Dougal helps him come up with an idea, but he didn't realise there were a lot of small ideas after. Mrs Doyle uses a novel form of chiropractic after she falls off the roof and Jack develops agoraphobia.
We also fill in the cultural and historical gaps between seasons two and three, discuss the racism in Breakfast at Tiffanys, the Nazi marketing machine, how the Irish kids TV show The Den delayed the news EVERY DAY, and how hard it is to find black clothes (the regular shops shaft us every time!).
Gerry Norman of rock band A Plastic Rose and his wife, street artist Friz (Marian Noone), board a flight with us where everything goes wrong - what is it with rock stars and planes?
Ted's fear of flying is justified after Dougal is given access to the cockpit and dooms the plane that they are on. Along with all the other priests on board, Ted must devise a way to distribute the two parachutes on board. Jack devises his own way, along with the drinks cart!
We also talk about maverick pilots and their handbrake turns, people's fake smiles, the influence of The Simpsons on the series and honeymoons to the Father Ted house! You're making a noise!
Lifelong Ted fan, Sean Treanor hosts the nightmarish Father Fintan Stack and his 3am jungle music, but at least he had his fun, and that's all matters. Jack's hairy hands has him stationed up in 'Jurassic Park', so Ted and Dougal have to entertain their new cereal-stealing housemate and Mrs Doyle manages to get her message above the din.
We also talk about sports days, hairy hands, Blaxploitation cinema and Dougal getting drunk!
Lifelong Ted fan Eamonn Turbett joins in the giving things up competition, or sorry, the sacrifice to Our Lord (Arnold, who's Arnold?). After Father Dick Byrne lays down the challenge, Ted volunteers himself, Dougal and Jack to give up their vices, while Mrs Doyle has a good miserable time on St Patrick's Hill.
Also in the sermon, we discuss the scourge of airhorns from the 90s, Opus Dei and their pain-is-the-cleanser ethos, and Pulp Fiction gimps
Actress Lindsey Mitchell and prodigal son Vince (they all have lovely bottoms) are on the judging panel for The Lovely Girls. Ted's has the honour of picking the winner, who will have the honour of paying for dinner for him. Dougal has to house sit but fiery feminist rock star Niamh Connolly is in the property market. Jack takes up charity fraud, while Mrs Doyle shows her competency with power tools.
Todd Unctious (well, actor Gerard McSorley) has been up to no good again, and we discuss amateur stress testers, Sinead O'Connor and Delores O'Riordan's impact on the musical and cultural landscape, and Vince's on-stage escapades where he leaves his drum kit mid-set! Shoddy workmanship. Shoddy, shoddy workmanship.
DJ and musician Graham Harrison has to cure The Plague befalling Craggy Island, as the whole place is coming down with rabbits and Ted and Dougal desperately search for a ways to get rid of them - on the eve of Bishop Brennan's impromptu visit! Mrs Doyle puts her mechanic skills to use on Len's car, while Jack confuses his rodents.
Also in the Sermon, we try to imagine the Islanders as characters on Police Academy, rabbit stories - cute AND creepy, which fictional serial killer Tom is most like and did Father Ted invent a horror trope? It's just a bad dream, Your Grace.
Composer and musician Marty Devine serenades us through Craggy Island's melodious tribute to Eurovision. Ted and Dougal go through some creative differences, but emerge with the classic My Lovely Horse (well, the lyrics at least). Jack's drinks cabinet has got a very expensive new addition and Mrs Doyle's brutally honest critiques would do well on the Judges panel of X Factor.
We speak about the lasting impact of having a gay couple on TV not doing anything gay, try to translate Fred Rickwood's gibberish, contemplate World War 4: Celebrity Superfans and LSD Communion.
Dick Byrne is at his conniving best, and we pay tribute to Caroline Ahearne, who had died earlier on the day we were recording. Marty takes us through some of his songwriting process (Don't play the f**king first note - the f**king first note is already f**king down!)
Donny Kingston, up and coming stand up on Belfast's comedy circuit, helps unravel the mystery of the stolen whistle and stave off complete societal breakdown on Craggy Island. It's just a whistle!
Dougal's finds a cool new friend in Father Damo (played by Joe Rooney), and gets to show off his football tekkers. Ted tries to relax on a picnic site, but unfortunately he runs in to a couple of fupping baxters. Mrs Doyle is on night duty and Jack displays his ninja skills with a couple of bottles of Jacob's Creek Chardonnay 1991.
There's another score in our Meet Your Maker feature, so who is that shows up, Graham or Arthur? Larry Duff actually answers his phone! It's not good news though. The Blur/Oasis rivalry gets a sermon (remember Feile 95? What a line up!), as does Street Fighter 2; bad piercings and Belfast's murals and checkpoints.
London Comedy Writers Olly Allsop and Jordan Birch attend the upgrading of the Holy Stone of Clonrickert to a Class 2 Relic. Hosting three bishops on the island is going to be the highlight of Mrs Doyle's career, but unfortunately she's lost her contact lenses. Dougal philosophises on the nature of Heaven and Hell and all that, while Ted has to bring Jack through a few elocution lessons (Th-th-th-that...).
We also share our own Gary Lineker Ghost Stories, the mechanics of Buckaroo (The Sport of Kings), and Dougal's Bjork obsession. It's a Priest thing, you wouldn't understand.
Improv artist and actor Marcus Keeley conducts the inquest into the most crooked raffle in Craggy Island history. Music is in the air, with Father Finnegan the dancing Priest (RIP) and the Spinmaster Father Billy O'Dwyer on the decks. Father Austin Purcell's droning drives Jack to the drink - so we baptise a new feature Jack's Drinking Cabinet, Mrs Doyle sticks to her principles when it comes to raffles, Dougal spatial awareness is still a concern when exiting doors and Belfast gets an official mention!
The endless Tayto v Tayto debate rears it's head and we marvel at the crumple zones on mid-90s Rovers. And if we can all stand for our National Anthem...
Colin Hassard joins us again to discuss Graham Norton's bow on the show as the relentless Father Noel Furlong. Father LARRY DUFF! He's tremendous fun, I'll give him a call. And Dougal's spatial awareness causes concern ("These cows are very small...")
It's July 19th, so to celebrate Galway's liberation from India, Jack reminds the Islanders to go on holidays - unfortunately they run into their own version of Ugly Naked Guy. Mrs Doyle has been baking with a different kind of white powder, which sets us talking about caravan holidays in Bundoran, Subbuteo collections, the curse of Fairy Trees, bonnet slides and an eyewitness account of Hurricane Sandy in New York.