He was the fun one. The loud one. The light in every room.
But behind the smile, he was quietly falling apart.
In this vulnerable and powerful conversation, we explore what happens when the version of you that everyone loves stops working—when the mask slips, and the pain finally surfaces.
My longtime friend, Kyle Flanagan, shares his journey through emotional burnout, identity crisis, self-destructive choices, and the slow process of rebuilding his life with honesty and compassion. We talk about:
Hiding in the role of “the happy one”
What unaddressed pain can do to a marriage, faith, and friendships
The lies we tell ourselves to avoid shame
Radical self-compassion and what it really means to heal
How tiny acts of kindness and connection rebuild your sense of worth
The difference between pretending to be joyful and actually feeling joy again
This episode is a powerful reminder that you’re not too far gone, you’re not too broken, and you don’t have to perform to be loved.
Whether you’re holding it all together for everyone else, or just starting to question who you really are beneath the mask—this one’s for you.
I turned 43 this week—and in a twist of timing (or divine alignment?), it just so happens this is also the 43rd episode of Dear Annie Joy. So I'm opening up with 3 honest confessions about the things I used to believe, the stories I’m unlearning, and the freedom I’ve found on the other side.
In this episode, I’m sharing the emotional truths behind:
Midlife rediscovery and starting something new
Letting go of hustle culture and learning to trust alignment
The power of trying even when you’re not sure you’ll get it “right”
What burnout recovery, spiritual growth, and nervous system peace actually feel like
If you’ve ever felt behind, too messy, or unsure of your next step—I hope this feels like a warm hug and a deep exhale.
Feel free to each out through IG @dear.anniejoy or email me at hello@anniejoy.com
When life takes a turn you never asked for, what happens next? In this conversation with Amber Jackson, we talk about grief, growth, and how joy still shows up — even when nothing looks like it was supposed to. If you're holding heartbreak and hope at the same time, this one’s for you.
Amber is a writer, speaker, and fierce believer in honest storytelling. She shares what it looks like to rebuild when the old version of life is gone, how to grieve out loud, and what it really means to hold joy and pain in the same space.
This episode is tender, funny, gritty, and real. It's a true invitation to let go of the plan and lean into what’s actually unfolding.
What happens when the life you planned disappears
Loud grief vs. quiet grief
Rebuilding identity after deep loss
Finding joy that doesn’t need permission
How true friendship holds space for both the mess and the magic
Connect with Amber:
Instagram: @enjoyingholland
Get her Joy Journal
This is a story I never thought I’d share publicly. It involves my bladder, a lot of childhood shame, and how one of my most embarrassing struggles ended up making me a softer, more compassionate mom.
In this episode, I open up about what it was like to deal with bladder issues well into elementary school, how that shaped the way I saw myself, and the years I spent carrying quiet shame. I also share how that experience became a surprising gift, one that allowed me to show up with more tenderness and patience when my own child faced potty training challenges.
We talk about:
My earliest experience with shame (and how it lived in my body for years)
How shame is different from guilt—and why that matters
How healing my own story helped me become the mom I needed as a child
What it looks like to reframe painful memories with grace and curiosity
If you've ever felt like your past disqualified you or made you "too much," I hope this episode helps you feel a little more seen—and a little more free.
If you have questions or want to reach out, my email is hello@anniejoy.com
Twenty‑three years ago, I didn’t know if I’d see another birthday. I was lost in self‑loathing and loneliness, and I tried to end my life. That moment became the start of learning how to care for my own soul, and eventually, how to choose radical joy.
In this episode, I share the full story for the first time publicly. I talk about the pain that led me there, the people who helped me stay, and the lessons that taught me what joy really means.
Radical joy isn’t pretending everything’s fine. It’s staying with yourself in the dark, noticing small moments of light, and trusting that somehow it will all work out. It’s not a finish line, it’s a lifeline.
If you’ve ever felt tired of the noise in your own head or wondered if things can get better, this episode is for you. You’re not broken. You’re already worthy of the gentle kind of joy that shows up simply because you’re still here.
Trigger warning: this episode includes discussion of suicide and trauma. Please listen with care, and if you’re struggling, call or text 988 for support.
If this story speaks to you, share it with a friend who might need some hope today, or come tell me one small thing that’s bringing you joy right now over on Instagram @anniejoy.
And if you’d like updates about my upcoming private podcast and resources on living with radical joy, email me at hello@anniejoy.com to get on the list.
Today I am sharing powerful stories of interfaith kindness, including the recent passing of President Russell M. Nelson and how people outside my faith offered love and support in deeply meaningful ways. I'm unpacking why spiritual empathy matters, telling a moving story about a Muslim leader’s friendship with President Nelson, and offering 7 practical, soul-honoring ways to support friends of other faiths, even the ones that have left your faith tradition.
Whether you're actively religious, deconstructing, or somewhere in between, this episode is a reminder that you don’t have to agree to care and you don’t have to understand to love deeply.
Key themes:
– Spiritual empathy
– Interfaith compassion
– Faith transitions
– Emotional safety
– Supporting loved ones without pressure
✨ “Love doesn’t ask us to be right—it asks us to be kind.”
—
Mentioned:
• Story of President Nelson and the Muslim leader
• Fireside with Sister Eubank
• Michigan LDS chapel shooting
• Interview with Jesse Ellis (Episode #38_)
📩 Share this episode with someone you care about. And if it touched your heart, leave a review so more women can find their way home to joy.
The recent Charlie Kirk shooting has left many of us wondering how we got here — and how we can move forward in a culture of conflict. Outrage and division are everywhere, but what if we chose a different path?
In this episode, we explore what it takes to build bridges when division feels like the norm. My long time friend and therapist, Jesse Ellis, talks about breaking free from echo chambers, practicing curiosity, and using tools of repair that can transform not only marriages but also communities and culture.
We explore what it looks like to honor our differences without dehumanizing each other, how to choose compassion over contempt, and why building bridges starts with small, intentional choices.
If you’ve been feeling tired of the fighting but hungry for hope, this conversation will remind you that connection is still possible — even in a culture of conflict.
You open your phone. There it is — a text, a DM, an invite.
And suddenly you’re spiraling: Should I go? Should I stay home? Am I tired, or am I scared? Will I regret it if I say no? Will I regret it if I say yes?
If you’ve ever wrestled with the internal debate that comes with invitations, whether it’s a girls’ night, a work event, or even something at church, this episode is for you.
In today’s conversation, I’m unpacking how to tell the difference between:
✨ FOMO (fear of missing out) vs alignment
✨ Rest that refuels vs avoidance that drains
✨ A sacred yes vs a brave no
You’ll walk away with reflection questions you can use the next time an invite shows up so you can stop second-guessing yourself, release the guilt, and choose what’s truly aligned for you.
Because here’s the truth: your worth isn’t measured by how many invitations you accept. Rest can be brave. Showing up can be brave. Either way, alignment is the goal.
Let’s connect on Instagram → @dear.anniejoy
🎙 Fun Called. She Wants You Back.
If life’s felt like one long to-do list lately, this episode is for you.
I’m sharing why fun isn’t a luxury—it’s part of your healing. Not just the science (though it’s real), but the real-life magic of what happens when we stop ghosting joy and start inviting her back in.
You’ll hear:
Why fun is a nervous system reset
How laughter + movement can shift your whole day
Why being playful doesn't make you less wise—it makes you whole
Plus—I'm sharing a personal story I’ve never said out loud on the mic before.
📣 Local friends! Join me for 90s Recess Night on Sept 23 in Gilbert, AZ!
Music. Movement. Magic. You in?
🎟 Grab your ticket → https://annie-carter-15b8.mykajabi.com/90-s-recess-night
This week on Dear Annie Joy, we’re diving into one of the hardest things for recovering people pleasers and boundary beginners—what to do when you say no and someone is clearly disappointed in you.
I know that ache. I’ve seen the face drop. I’ve heard the “oh… okay” that’s loaded with silent judgment. And I’ve felt the sick-to-my-stomach guilt that creeps in when my no isn’t met with grace.
So in today’s episode, we’re talking through:
Why saying no can feel so physically uncomfortable
How to tell the difference between guilt and actual remorse
The old internal rules we’ve been living by (like “don’t rock the boat” or “don’t disappoint anyone”)—and why they need to go
What true belonging actually looks like (hint: it includes room for your no)
Seven powerful steps to support yourself when someone doesn’t take your boundary well
And how to decode what their reaction reveals about the relationship
This is for the woman who is tired of self-abandoning just to keep the peace. It’s for the tender-hearted leader learning to trust her own capacity. And it’s for anyone who’s ever walked away from a conversation replaying every word and wondering, “Was I too much? Was I not enough?”
Friend, you’re not mean. You’re just not available for self-abandonment anymore.
So come sit with me—let’s name the hard, hold space for the tender, and anchor ourselves in truth. Because peace is worth protecting. And your no is holy ground.
🎧 Plus, I’m sharing some playful phrases you can keep in your back pocket when your “no” needs a little sparkle or sass.
Let’s stop shrinking to keep others comfortable. The world can adjust to your no—you don’t have to adjust to their disappointment.
If this episode spoke to you, will you leave a review? It helps other heart-heavy women find the show. Thank you for being here. I love you big time!
If you’ve ever wondered why you feel so exhausted even when you’re “doing all the right things,” this one’s for you, my friend. Today, I’m joined by my real-life friend and powerhouse encourager, Erika, who is on a mission to help moms (and honestly, all women) stop merely surviving and start truly living.
We’re busting the myth that you’re “just lazy” and unpacking what’s really going on when your energy feels like it’s constantly slipping through your fingers. Erica shares her personal journey from living at 8% battery life to finally feeling charged, and the practical ways she stopped the leaks — without adding more hustle to her plate.
You’ll hear us dive into:
The sneaky ways your energy gets drained without you noticing
How to tell if you’re running on empty and what it feels like to recharge
Why boundaries aren’t walls — and how to set them with light and love
The difference between holding space for emotions and trying to manage everyone else’s
What it looks like to find peace in the chaos (yes, even during “witching hour”)
Erica also shares her new program, The Spark Method, and the beautiful community she’s building for women who want to reclaim their joy, restore their energy, and stop feeling guilty for taking care of themselves.
Friend, if you’ve been living in survival mode for way too long, it’s time to plug back into what lights you up.
🔗 Links & Resources: Follow Erica on Instagram
Learn more about The Spark Method
If you’ve ever felt disconnected from God while sitting in a pew, or hollow while going through the motions of church, this episode is for you. I'm sharing the raw and redemptive story behind creating my Worship Journal—born from single motherhood, spiritual burnout, and a longing for a more personal, soul-deep connection with Heaven.
This isn’t about getting worship “right.” It’s about letting it get real.
What You'll Hear:
Why worship isn’t a checklist—it’s a conversation
A vulnerable story of attending church when it felt impossible to keep going
How a hospital room became a holy ground for connection with God
The difference between performing worship and experiencing worship
Honest questions to reflect on your relationship with God
How the Worship Journal can help you reconnect spiritually, emotionally, and personally
📖 Grab the Worship Journal This guided journal blends scripture, soul care, and psychology to help you worship in a way that feels sacred and sustainable. It’s not about doing more—it’s about going deeper.
Letting go can feel like losing a piece of yourself—but what if it’s actually an invitation to meet a deeper version of you? In this episode, I get real about the fears we face when we release things that no longer fit—jeans, jobs, friendships, even old versions of ourselves.
I’ll walk you through the myth of the void and reframe that “empty space” as a sacred clearing where joy, clarity, and connection can finally take root.
I’m sharing personal stories, gentle truth, and powerful reframes to help you soften your grip on what’s holding you back—so your hands (and heart) can be open to receive what’s next.
Because girl, letting go isn’t the end. It’s the beginning.
Hey friends—this episode is so close to my heart. I invited my dear friend and parenting coach, Amy Fraughton, onto the show to talk about something I hear from moms all the time: “My kid is being so disrespectful. What do I do?”
Whether you're parenting tweens, teens, or even adult children, this conversation is for you. We’re not here to shame, fix, or control our kids. We’re here to understand what’s underneath the behavior—and how we can respond in a way that builds connection, not control.
Amy specializes in working with parents of struggling kids—those who are navigating anxiety, big emotions, outbursts, or shutdowns. And her approach is all about grace, curiosity, and getting to the root of what’s really going on.
In this episode, we talk about:
Why disrespect is usually a signal, not a character flaw
The power of grace—for your child and for yourself
What to do when your kid's energy spikes and you're feeling triggered
Why your energy speaks louder than your words (yes—even if you're being calm)
How to shift from blame to teaching without losing your voice
Why walking away isn’t giving up—it’s creating space to reconnect
Sign up for Amy's free Miracle Cycle Guide
Check out her podcast The Parenting Connection
You’ve probably said it too: “I hate small talk.” But what if we've misunderstood its purpose? In today’s soul-stirring episode, I'm reframing small talk as emotional foreplay—the sacred warm-up that paves the way for real intimacy and deep connection.
I'll explain how small talk—when done with heart and curiosity—becomes a doorway to soul-aligned friendships. Whether you're an introvert, extrovert, or somewhere in between, this episode will shift how you approach connection forever.
🌱 What You’ll Hear:
• Why small talk gets a bad rep
• The real reason we crave deep connection
• How small talk builds safety and trust
• Conversation upgrades that move from awkward to aligned
• My favorite questions to spark meaningful moments
• How compliments can crack open hearts
• The soul truth: connection starts in the shallow end
🙏 Listener Love:
If this episode spoke to your soul, share it with a friend who needs encouragement in her connection journey. And don’t forget to leave a review to help more women find their way back home to joy.
In today’s episode, I'm diving into the art of apology—why “I’m sorry you feel that way” doesn’t cut it, and what to say instead to create genuine healing and connection.
Whether you're navigating a tough conversation with your child, partner, or friend, this episode is your guide to emotional safety, nervous system support, and conflict transformation.
You’ll learn:
Why intent doesn’t matter as much as impact
How your nervous system reacts during conflict
The difference between validation and agreement
Simple, compassionate phrases that build bridges (instead of walls)
How to apologize in a way that brings connection—not contention
If you’re constantly trying to get it right, be liked, or keep it all together, you’re not alone. But when we’re performing, we’re not present. And without presence, we miss real connection.
In this episode, I talk with two brilliant improv trainers and actors (and longtime friends, Julie & her husband, Jake) about how simple shifts in how we show up—especially in everyday moments—can change everything.
We unpack what it means to stop performing, start connecting, and how play can help bring us back to ourselves.
You’ll hear:
Why presence feels risky—but creates real connection
How performing shows up in subtle ways (even with people we love)
What improv can teach us about being human
Tiny shifts to feel more seen, without saying more
If you feel like you’re doing all the right things but still feeling unseen—this one’s for you.
Check out more from Jake & Julie Suazo! Their Instagram is @thrillscorptraining
In this episode, I’m talking about why hustle culture leaves so many high-achieving women spiritually starving. I share how slowing down, reconnecting with God, and building personal spiritual practices can help you heal, feel whole, and rediscover your joy.
You’ll get three simple, powerful steps to deepen your faith, strengthen your spiritual connection, and break free from the pressure to constantly perform. I also share a sneak peek at my upcoming Worship Journal — packed with prompts, reflections, and tools to help you create meaningful, soul-nourishing moments with God.
If you’re craving spiritual growth, more purpose, or a deeper sense of belonging, this episode is for you. Please leave a review if it speaks to your heart — it helps more women find this women’s empowerment and faith podcast. Here's the link to sign up for my email newsletter so you can be the first to know when the Worship Journal drops!
Sign up HERE
Today we’re diving into a conversation so many women avoid — how to face yourself with kindness in the dressing room mirror. If you’ve ever felt dressing room anxiety, battled negative self-talk, or struggled with body image after life changes (hello, postpartum body!), this episode is for you. I’m opening up vulnerably about my own emotional wellness journey, sharing the mindset shifts that helped me stop shaming my body and start practicing body gratitude. Together, we’ll explore how confidence doesn’t come from appearance or chasing perfection — it comes from reconnecting to your self-worth, speaking love over your body, and embracing your light. You’ll hear: 💛 Practical body-positive self-talk scripts to try next time you’re shopping 💛 How to break free from comparison traps and people-pleasing cycles 💛 Why emotional healing and positive mindset shifts matter more than diets or surgeries 💛 How to create an empowered, joyful relationship with your body at any age If you’re ready to release the mental load of body shame and step into more empowered, confident living, you are in the right place. This episode is your reminder that you are worthy, lovable, and powerful — just as you are. ✨ Ready to join me on this women’s empowerment journey? Hit subscribe, share this episode with a friend, or leave a review so we can help more women find joy, healing, and confidence after burnout or body image struggles. You deserve to feel at home in your body and in your life. 💛
Today I’m sharing why I’ve stopped using the term coping skills—and what I believe we actually need instead. For women like us—deep feelers, people-pleasers, moms carrying too much—coping often feels like white-knuckling. Like surviving, not healing. In this episode, I talk about: Why your emotions aren’t too much—they’re messengers How to soothe your nervous system instead of “fixing” your feelings A simple practice to support yourself in the moment (hand over heart, exhale—it’s magic) How I’m breaking generational cycles around emotional shame This episode is for the woman who’s tired of shrinking, tired of stuffing her feelings, and so ready to come home to herself.