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Decoding Attachment Styles
Annalisa Bahadur
71 episodes
5 days ago
You’re doing “the talk wrong and I’ll help you fix it. First, think - an avoidant brain is not a secure brain. You can’t talk to it like it’s an emotionally healthy brain. We think we have to soft talk an avoidant but they are really looking at you thinking - “ I got this exactly where I want it.” I spoke kindly and softy for decades and that got me nothing but breadcrumbs and disrespect. ps: these tips are only for the emotionally immature. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episod...
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Self-Improvement
Education,
Health & Fitness,
Mental Health
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You’re doing “the talk wrong and I’ll help you fix it. First, think - an avoidant brain is not a secure brain. You can’t talk to it like it’s an emotionally healthy brain. We think we have to soft talk an avoidant but they are really looking at you thinking - “ I got this exactly where I want it.” I spoke kindly and softy for decades and that got me nothing but breadcrumbs and disrespect. ps: these tips are only for the emotionally immature. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episod...
Show more...
Self-Improvement
Education,
Health & Fitness,
Mental Health
Episodes (20/71)
Decoding Attachment Styles
How To Respond To Avoidants
You’re doing “the talk wrong and I’ll help you fix it. First, think - an avoidant brain is not a secure brain. You can’t talk to it like it’s an emotionally healthy brain. We think we have to soft talk an avoidant but they are really looking at you thinking - “ I got this exactly where I want it.” I spoke kindly and softy for decades and that got me nothing but breadcrumbs and disrespect. ps: these tips are only for the emotionally immature. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episod...
Show more...
5 days ago
19 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Magic & Mayhem- When Two Avoidants Date
It can be intoxicating when two avoidants meet. There is chemistry and calm. But what happens when there is too much chemistry and calm for two people who are used to chaos? They may become bored and distant until there is a disconnect. And what happens after the disconnect? One or both can flip into their anxious state and seek reasons to stay connected- like a business venture on this case. This episode highlight how the brain works in the background to cause us to self-sabotage long ...
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1 week ago
1 hour

Decoding Attachment Styles
Love Bombed, Disregarded and Discarded By An Avoidant
Sarah felt seen and validated until things turned for the worse with her avoidant attached partner. He then got up and left. You will see yourself in her story? You will learn from this coaching session how to navigate feelings the confusion and feeling of betrayal after being love bombed and discarded. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show
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2 weeks ago
1 hour 14 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Avoidant to Secure Navigating a Relationship with an Avoidant
It wasn’t easy for her , but Sarah felt like she had no choice but to shut herself away or withdraw from the demands and overwhelm - even if that sometimes came from her children. In this episode, Sarah tells what happens in the mind of a avoidant when they are going through their deactivation and what they think during this time. She also shares how she healed after her partner abandoned her and their children, and how she deals with romantic relationships now. I woul...
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3 weeks ago
1 hour 1 minute

Decoding Attachment Styles
Blindsided, Betrayed but Not Broken
Very little is more devasting than the condition of being blindsided and betrayed by an avoidant attached persons. Sure they have their reasons but that doesn’t negate the pain their sudden exit cause when we are the ones left behind. In this episode, Sarah (name changed) shares her struggles to get through a breakup (divorce) with her ex and her determination to heal. We can all see ourselves in her story- we feel her pain and we root for her. I would love to hear your ...
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1 month ago
1 hour 2 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Why It’s Hard To Walk Away From Someone With Different Attachment Style
You know that you should walk away yet it is so difficult for you to pull the plug on this Relationship. You might’ve even tried to leave in the past but always return to this familiar and uncomfortable place. Why does this happen? In this podcast, we explore our attachment style and how it keeps us stuck in relationships we know we should get out of. We also discuss tools we can use to make letting go easier. Support the show
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1 month ago
16 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Why Your Avoidant Partner Wants the Relationship But Hates the Label
Imagine craving the warmth of a campfire. You love the light, the comfort, the shared stories. You want to be close enough to feel its heat. But the moment someone says, "Here, tie this rope around your waist and anchor yourself to this log right next to the flames," you panic. The very thing that offered comfort suddenly feels like a trap. The fire hasn't changed; the constraint has. This is the daily reality for many with an avoidant attachment style when they hear the word "commitmen...
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1 month ago
30 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Fearful Avoidant Talks About Self-Sabotaging
Sarah (name changed) has been a relationship with a fearful avoidant for almost a year. All was going well until it got rocky. She now wants to try again but with some boundaries in place. Sarah and I sat down recently to discuss how it could look going forward for her and her partner. Sarah agreed to have this session recorded and aired for the benefit of everyone listening. Remember, as humans, our views and needs differ. Take what you believe would be helpful for your situation...
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1 month ago
1 hour 21 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Why Your Ex May Or May Not Respond To Your Text
Send us a text You hit send. You see the “Delivered” tick turn to “Read.” And then... nothing. The silence is louder than any notification. Your mind starts racing: Are they hurt? Are they ignoring me? Did my message come on too strong? Was it the wrong emoji? Before you spiral into that abyss of overthinking, we want you to hit pause. The reason for that silent phone likely has very little to do with you, and everything to do with their internal wiring- their attachment style. In this episod...
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1 month ago
42 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
The Push-Pull and Navigating Second Chances
Send us a text When you're in a relationship shaped by attachment insecurities, the questions are complex, urgent, and deeply personal. In this episode of Decoding Attachment, host Annalisa Bahadur tackles your real-world dilemmas with clarity and compassion, offering actionable strategies for some of the toughest dynamics. We're moving beyond theory and into the trenches to answer your pressing questions, including… “An FA leaning anxious – do we treat them as anxious?” We break down...
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1 month ago
32 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Is Space Without Contact Okay?
Send us a text Is it okay for your partner to take space and drop off the face of the earth without responding to your texts or calls? Not if you’re in a serious committed relationship. This podcast explains why and what you should do. If you’re avoidant attached and want to know how to ask for space without your partner getting upset- listen to this podcast. Please share this podcast if you found it helpful. Support the show
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2 months ago
43 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
How Long Does Rebound Relationships Last
Send us a text This episode shares the time line in which the avoidant show interested in the rebound, starts to withdraws and goes back to their ex. The episode talks about why Avoidant Attached jumps into soon after a break up, what their intentions are when returning to and what you can do to prevent yourself from becoming rebound. Support the show
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2 months ago
54 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Why Avoidant Get Into Rebounds
Send us a text This is what we are talking about today- Why avoidants rush into reboundsThe negative consequences of rebound relationshipsWhether avoidants come back to their exWhat their (often anxious) partners should doHealthier alternatives for avoidantsHow secure individuals handle breakups and reboundsDon’t forget to leave a review so others can know how this episode may help them too. Thanks in advance. Support the show
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2 months ago
42 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
How to Set Boudaries When Giving Another Chance
Send us a text Setting buddies after giving someone a second chance can feel tricky. We want to let them back into our lives but how do we do it with light lagging them take us for granted again. This podcasts answers that question. Support the show
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4 months ago
26 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Don’t Feel Like The Priority? Listen to this
Send us a text We all want to feel like the priority in the relationship but this is often not felt when in a relationship with an avoidant attached person. But is this only with a avoidant attached partner or can an insecure (anxious or avoidant) attached feel that way with a secure attached as well. This podcast helps to break down a few possible reasons you may not feel that way. Support the show
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4 months ago
30 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Simple Way To Know Your Attachment Style
Send us a text It can be confusing spotting your attachment style or knowing exactly which is your partners attachment style. This podcast simplifies the attachment style so you can understand them and appreciate how and why they show up in your every day life. You’ll also have a better understanding of how and if your partner can trigger a different attachment within you. Share you thoughts on the podcast, please. As well as share to friends and family members if you think this can m...
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4 months ago
13 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
How Co-Dependency Ruins Your Relationship But Doesn’t Have To
Send us a text Do you find you’re in a co-dependent relationship that is affecting your relationship? Maybe you need them too much, or perhaps you don’t want to need them as much but don’t know what to do. This podcast shares how our attachment styles show up in co-dependent relationships and what you can do to manage it. Support the show
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4 months ago
18 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Should You Stay Single and Wait For Secure Attached Partner
Send us a text Should you leave early Relationship and heal or stay single until you find someone who is securely attached? Is it that simple? Better yet, would it be best to heal your attachment style while still in a relationship or while waiting for someone who is securely attached, I believe that might be a better bet and in this podcast, I share how to attachment styles or formulated so that you have a better understanding of the work that you’re gonna wanna do in order to heal that atta...
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5 months ago
18 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
Understanding and Healing Avoidant Attachment.
Send us a text One of the most taught after answers in our time now is how to manage a relationship with an Avoidant Attached person and, what is really going on in their minds. This episode helps and Avoidant Attached person understand themselves better as well as starter healing journey. It also helps those who are interested in understanding and appreciating their Avoidant Attached friends and Partner Better. Dropping the comment section how this particular episode changed your perspecti...
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5 months ago
29 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
What Are The Signs That An Avoidant Ex Is Forever Gone?
Send us a text This is a recording of the regular Wednesday live Instagram. On today’s episode we answered these questions 👇…and more… What are the signs that an avoidant ex is forever gone and the relationship has ended Man has been living a double life. He’s been in two relationships while messaging other women. What should I do? Do avoidant people honestly love and care about you, or is it just a game? If I have awareness that I am an anxious attached person and my part...
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5 months ago
1 hour 2 minutes

Decoding Attachment Styles
You’re doing “the talk wrong and I’ll help you fix it. First, think - an avoidant brain is not a secure brain. You can’t talk to it like it’s an emotionally healthy brain. We think we have to soft talk an avoidant but they are really looking at you thinking - “ I got this exactly where I want it.” I spoke kindly and softy for decades and that got me nothing but breadcrumbs and disrespect. ps: these tips are only for the emotionally immature. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episod...