Where the discussion inevitably turns to what was on the radio in 1995. Put a wet rag over your mouth as we ask: Can we pick an adultery policy and stick to it? Do people of below average intelligence have feelings? How many songs are requried for this to not be a single? For fans of: publishing right filler, tape saturation, and being about 5 years behind the trend.

Wherein God takes a nap. Questions abound: Who said what about who? Would you rather? What else can we take from George Harrison? For fans of: notable quotables, impressing Christgau, and rotting in the sun.

Punk rock: it was a big tent back in those days. Meet up with musclehead zombie Elvis for what turns out to be a good deal of fun. Which host is most likely to be eaten by Danzig’s cats? Did Danzig and Doyle wrestle ever? Does more Misfits mean more moms? For fans of: the horrors Eisenhower-era, plaintiff’s attorneys, Doyle.

Dirty Van Morrison does bad Genesis and we kinda like it. Control your breathing as we ask: Did you get a load of that guy? With the nose? And the teeth? Ew. For fans of: the crazy eyes, prancing but not dancing, nicknaming the homeless rather than arming them.

That’s about 200 degrees Celsius, give or take. Feel free to use the whole disc while we ask: Doesn’t your brother own birds? If we aren’t hot boys, what would you call us? Was the world a better place when Lil Wayne really was little? For fans of: the remix, the other remix, the other other remix.

This is the one where we start to get our feelings hurt about certain hosts’ rankings of certain songs. But it all works out in the end. In this episode, we ask many questions, like children often do: Tell me all your thoughts on god (oops, not a question). Where the hell is Superdrag? (fantastic question). When are you two starting a family? (Never an appropriate question, please leave). For fans of: really knowing what it’s like to have the blues, maybe; protecting the pretty babies; being glad because one kid had it worse than that (ie, Charismatic Pentacostalism).

We love the 90s! That’s because our brains find comfort in familiarity, especially when it’s tied to a time in our lives when we had few responsibilities. That’s likely also true of your brain! Let fuzzy memories rock you to sleep as we discuss bands you’ve heard of, bands you don't remember and we do for some reason, and bands Josh made up. On part one, we mostly crawl through a bunch of muck (like Shawshank! 90s!) to find the answers to questions like: Are you Jimmy Ray? Is anyone, really? What do Dead Kennedys and Meredith Brooks have in common aside from strident political anthems? For fans of: letting others change lanes when they are driving in their car, which is the only time it’s helpful; guy-remembering; thinking about something you don’t like until you explode.

It’s just one of those long-winded extended metaphors of Geoff’s / The kind with too many syllables and you want less. Get out your red pen and ask: Does something bad happen to you if you stop talking? Wait, aren’t they all cliffs? Should we give Thrice a shot? For fans of: verse/verse/verse, metaphor marriage, and sans serif fonts.

It’s a Swiss band that says they’re Celtic and you assume is Nordic doing songs about entering the oblivion even though they said they’re going into the pandemonium. FINE THEN. Let the hard frost freeze your roots and numb your senses as we ask: What genres are present (in terms of parts per million)? What’s ‘ol Tommy HellHammer got up his sleeve this time? Hey, didn’t this bell toll for thee already? For fans of: Renegade$, Celtic Pride (1996), and keeping people on their toes.

Like a rocky Nordic ridge, there are peaks and there are valleys, both extreme. Put another Eurovision trophy on the mantle as we ask: Who got musical in my discotheque? Who got discotheque in my musical? Can you feel the music industry slowly draining the joy from this enterprise, Fernando? For fans of: maximalism, matching jumpsuits, and a hint of Latin flavor.

Weird guys talk weird guys who talk mostly about weird guys. Get your weird ass over here so we can ask you some questions: You get a load of that fella? Would you like to know round ‘bout how many years it’s been since we seen him and the sorts of things he would often say? What are the stories behind the music? For fans of: one band and one band only, festival circuits (plural), and tolerating your tourmates.

We don’t want to blame the whole thing on 9/11, but…. Lower your denominators and ask: A clip show already? Will the Deftones forgive us? Which President is it not unlike? For fans of: snares tuned high, guitars tuned low, self-awareness simultaneously tuned high and low.

Can’t sell out if you don’t got choruses. Put a bunch of stickers on your bass and ask: Did you know the guitar strap is adjustable in both directions? Can we be serious for a minute, or maybe even more than a minute? Should skateboarding continue not being a crime? For fans of: verse/verse/verse, addressing the president directly, and fart noises as a personality trait.

Featuring our friend from real life and the podcast Nailed, Blake. Cheek, kink, and camp—we’ve got it all! Yawn for the camera as we ask: What sort of lads are we dealing with here? Can you let the lady sing a song? What King of the Hill thing are you thinking about? For fans of: dance sensations, hearing the parody first, and knowing the difference because it could mean your life.

Bad news, we tricked you into joining our sleep study. Imagine your breath as the gentle rhythm of a distant sea and ask: Did you hear that rumor about us? Why, so you guys could just lie to get me here? So you could sit me here next to Britney Spears? For fans of: in-between Strat positions, sterile laboratories, and Sheryl Crow’s less difficult material. 

We swapped microphones every few words for this one. Walk calmly but quickly away from Steven Tyler and ask: Were we supposed to do basslines for all of them? Which 30-year-old cheerleader is it not unlike? What does Jewel think about all this? For fans of: VH1 through the ages, authorial intent, and desperately grasping for Run DMC’s coattails. 

Selling England by the Pound  Joe Strummer is going to be so mad. Keep your voice down while we ask: Not English enough, ha? How can such a small island support so many supermarket chains? If the band doesn’t work, maybe film school? For fans of: Intended puns, all English everything, and superfluous ‘postrophes that’s all scatter’d about.  

Monoliths and Dimensions  The producer is giving us the “stretch it out” signal. Come to the far north of…oh, America. That’s disappointing. But anyway: What kind of amps do y’all use? How much greater is the whole than the parts? Are we gonna do Stonehenge tomorrow night? For fans of: DUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN, commitment to the bit, and lying in the bed you made. 

The Golden Casket  Let’s see what most of the boys have been up to. Push/pull from above and below the stars and dirt and ask: How many Modest Mouses are there these days? Did we give Jeremiah Green enough to do? Can the love of a child melt even the coldest of hearts? For fans of: Creative direction, things and the opposite of those things, and kidding because you love the major third interval.

Deguello  Honestly, the unexamined life sounds pretty fun. Bring A MINIMUM OF one friend and ask: Does this everyday object remind you of anything? Can you play the blues without having them? Qualis artifex pereo? For fans of: Careful sequencing, incrementalism, and that sweet Donahue sound.