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To Be A Boy
To Be A Boy
33 episodes
5 days ago
Ever wondered how to navigate raising boys in this bonkers world? Enter To Be A Boy', where hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae tackle the murky waters of masculinity and boyhood. From societal stereotypes to the influence of porn, they provide a candid take on raising well-rounded boys. Expect personal anecdotes, belly laughs, and deep dives as they dismantle harmful clichés and champion honest conversations. They explore male friendships, educational gaps, mental health struggles, and tough topics like male violence. Join the conversation for a supportive community with fun and heart.
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Parenting
Kids & Family
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All content for To Be A Boy is the property of To Be A Boy and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Ever wondered how to navigate raising boys in this bonkers world? Enter To Be A Boy', where hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae tackle the murky waters of masculinity and boyhood. From societal stereotypes to the influence of porn, they provide a candid take on raising well-rounded boys. Expect personal anecdotes, belly laughs, and deep dives as they dismantle harmful clichés and champion honest conversations. They explore male friendships, educational gaps, mental health struggles, and tough topics like male violence. Join the conversation for a supportive community with fun and heart.
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Parenting
Kids & Family
Episodes (20/33)
To Be A Boy
THE John Amaechi on men, masculinity and monsters.

Joeli and Elliott sit down with, yes you heard us right, John Amaechi to talk all things sports, identity and masculinity, emphasizing the importance of emotional intelligence and intimacy among men. John reflects on his experiences as a latecomer to basketball and how it shaped his understanding of masculinity.

They also roll up their sleeves and delve into the societal pressures surrounding masculinity, the need for empathy, and the responsibility of parents and coaches in nurturing healthy relationships. John advocates for a redefinition of masculinity that embraces vulnerability and connection, urging listeners to foster environments where boys can express their emotions freely and develop meaningful relationships: it's right up our street.


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1 week ago
58 minutes 52 seconds

To Be A Boy
The Don of Boys and Men: Richard Reeves

In this episode of To Be A Boy, Elliott Rae and Joeli Brearley sit down with Richard Reeves—author of Of Boys and Men and chair of the UK’s Centre for Policy Research on Boys and Men—for a candid, compassionate conversation about the challenges facing boys and young men today.

Together, they explore how schools can better support boys, why male role models matter, and how masculinity can be reimagined without shame or stereotype. Whether you're a parent, educator, policymaker, or simply curious about gender equality, this episode offers a refreshing and nuanced take on what it means to grow up male in today’s world.

If he's good enough for Obama, he's good enough for TBAB!

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2 weeks ago
59 minutes 1 second

To Be A Boy
Questions with... our Kaley

In this episode, Joeli, Elliott, and Producer Kaley havetheir first ‘Questions with Kaley’ session.

The TBAB team explore the concept of 'the ick' in dating, the importance of emotional support in relationships, and the impact of paternity leave on family dynamics. Joeli passes on some cracking advice about future proofing the dynamic with a Dad and Elliott reveals his Good Man ofmusic, and MORE people!


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3 weeks ago
33 minutes 56 seconds

To Be A Boy
(Gentle) Parenting with Sarah Ockwell-Smith

In this heartfelt and thought-provoking episode of To BeA Boy, Joeli and Elliott are joined by the brilliant SarahOckwell-Smith, one of the UK’s leading parenting experts and bestselling author of The Gentle Parenting Book and How to Raise a Teen.

Together, they dive deep into the challenges and misconceptions surrounding modern boyhood, masculinity, and parenting, with Sarah offering rich insights from her decades of experience and her upcoming book How to Raise a Gentle Man. The trio explore how we can better support boys with an emphasis on birth through adolescence, challenging stereotypes and championing emotional intelligence, empathy, and authentic self-expression. You.will.learn.a.lot!


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1 month ago
59 minutes 53 seconds

To Be A Boy
Class, Culture, and the Classroom: A New Vision for Boys’ Education

In this episode Joeli and Elliott speak with Dr. Alex Blowerto dive into the uphill battle faced by working-class boys in education—think less Hogwarts, more hurdles. From aspiration gaps to the masculinity myths messing with motivation, he shares insights, stories, and a few reality checks. It’s time to rethink how we support boys in the classroom.


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1 month ago
49 minutes 19 seconds

To Be A Boy
LIVE! from The Working Dads’ Summit

Join us live from the phenomenal Working Dads’ Summit! In To Be A Boy’s first live recording, Joeli faces a grilling from Elliott. They explore the impact of the motherhood penalty, the importance of parental leave, co-parenting, and the role of support networks for working parents.

As per usual, get in touch with your thoughts and questionsat tobeaboyteam@gmail.com

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1 month ago
29 minutes 36 seconds

To Be A Boy
Redefining Roles and Relationships with Beyond Equality

From body image and the pressure to provide, to violence, vulnerability and viral masculinity myths—this episode dives deep into the challenges boys face and how we can support them. Elliott and Joeli chat with Dan Guinness and Ben Hurst from Beyond Equality about what it means to be a boy today. Expect wisdom, warmth, and a few laughs along the way.

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1 month ago
1 hour 2 minutes 31 seconds

To Be A Boy
Out with Aggression: Raising Sweet Boys with Tosha Schore

In this powerful and practical episode, Joeli and Elliott sit down with parenting coach and founder of Parenting Boys Peacefully, Tosha Schore, to tackle one of the toughest topics: aggression in boys.


From meltdowns and morning chaos to verbal outbursts and sibling clashes, Tosha shares compassionate, connection-based strategies for helping boys manage big feelings—without shame, blame or punishment. Expect real talk, relatable stories, and tips you can use today (including the surprisingly effective “drop to the floor” method).

---------------

parentingboyspeacefully.com/OWA


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2 months ago
55 minutes 31 seconds

To Be A Boy
Series 3 BABY! Back to School, Back to Boyhood

We’re back! Joeli and Elliott catch up after summer, swap stories about Welsh golf buggies and nudist beaches, and reflect on the emotional rollercoaster of raising boys and returning to school, expect a few tears. Joeli shares her new venture, GrowthSpurt, and Elliott previews the world’s first Working Dads Summit. Plus, a sneak peek at the incredible guests lined up for Series 3, including Richard Reeves, John Amaechi, and Beyond Equality.

—----------------------------

GrowthSpurt www.growth-spurt.uk

Working Dads Summit www.workingdadssummit.com

Parenting Out Loud on LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/company/parenting-out-loud


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2 months ago
25 minutes 3 seconds

To Be A Boy
From Grunts to Growth: Talking Boys with Christopher Pepper

Health educator and author Christopher Pepper joins Joeli and Elliott to talk puberty, masculinity, gaming, anger, love, and what to do when your son might be Googling “how to get bigger muscles.” From emotional literacy to ethical decision-making, this episode is packed with practical advice, heartfelt stories, and laughs for anyone raising boys in today’s world.

-----------------

www.talktoyourboys.com

⁠workingdadssummit.com⁠⁠

www.laurahenryallain.com/news/my-skin-your-skin/


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2 months ago
53 minutes 35 seconds

To Be A Boy
Raising Better Boys with Uju Asika

In this warm, funny, and deeply insightful episode, Joeli and Elliott are joined by author and boy-mum extraordinaire Uju Asika, whose latest book Raising Boys Who Do Better is a hopeful guide for parenting boys in today’s complex world. From cuddles and culture clashes to clitoris conversations and pickled onion Monster Munch, this episode dives into the joys and challenges of raising boys with kindness, clarity, and a whole lot of humour.

------------------------

Raising Boys Wo do Better

workingdadssummit.com⁠

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3 months ago
50 minutes 47 seconds

To Be A Boy
Breaking the Mold: Masculinity, Mentorship & Future Men

Joeli and Elliott are joined by Owen Thomas and Chris Stein from Future Men to explore how we can better support boys in today’s world. From redefining masculinity and tackling stereotypes to practical tools for parents and educators, this episode is packed with insight, humour, and hope.

----------------------------

futuremen.org

workingdadssummit.com

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3 months ago
51 minutes 5 seconds

To Be A Boy
Raising Boys in a Digital World with Michele Borba

Dr. Michele Borba joins Elliott and Joeli to explore why boys today are more anxious, lonely, and stressed—and what parents can do to help. From bedtime chats to ukulele therapy, this episode is packed with practical tips, heartfelt stories, and a few laughs. Discover how small acts (like a Post-it note) can make a big impact.


https://micheleborba.com

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3 months ago
48 minutes 19 seconds

To Be A Boy
Holding the Rope and Showing Up

Joeli and Elliott reflect on the emotional leap from primary to secondary school — for kids and parents alike. From leavers’ assemblies and letting go to puberty, peer pressure and parenting panic. They share personal stories, expert advice from Caroline Jacobs, and advice on surviving the summer holiday chaos — with your sanity (mostly) intact.

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3 months ago
41 minutes 3 seconds

To Be A Boy
Steve Biddulph: Raising Boys with Heart
We’re joined by the legendary Steve Biddulph—psychologist, global parenting guru, and the reason many of us still believe we can survive the teen years—we dive headfirst into the wild, wonderful, and sometimes worrisome world of raising boys. Expect laughter, maybe a tear or two, and plenty of “aha!” moments as we explore modern boyhood with someone who’s seen it all.Steve brings compassion and clarity to the chaos, tackling tough topics like toxic online cultures and those mysterious moods that arrive just after bedtime. For every parent who’s ever stayed up worrying (or Googling “How to talk to my son without being embarrassing”), this episode offers practical wisdom and a reminder: you’re not alone in wanting your boy to grow up kind, confident, and happy.
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4 months ago
53 minutes 11 seconds

To Be A Boy
Cracking the Code on Online Safety with the Rt Hon Peter Kyle

Elliott and Joeli tackle the urgent topic of online safety, sharing scary stats like children in the UK spending an average of 134 minutes a day on TikTok and 49 minutes on Instagram in 2024, with 36% of kids aged eight to 17 having seen something worrying or nasty online in the past year.

Joined by Peter Kyle, Secretary of State for Science, Innovation and Technology, they explore the government’s new Online Safety Act— which the government claims has some of the world’s most sweeping protections—which now require social media platforms to safeguard young users from everything from cyberbullying to violent and harmful content. Tune in for a fun, insightful conversation full of practical tips and the latest on how digital life for young people in the UK is set to change for the better.


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4 months ago
41 minutes 56 seconds

To Be A Boy
Sex Ed & Embracing Awkwardness

We’re diving into the wonderfully awkward world of sex ed for kids—covering everything from “where do babies come from?” to the importance of pleasure. Joeli and Elliott share honest tips, relatable stories, and answer your questions on how to talk to kids about sex, consent, and relationships—without losing your cool.

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4 months ago
45 minutes 25 seconds

To Be A Boy
Addiction, Parenting, and Jessica Lahey

Did you know that in the UK, men are nearly three times more likely than women to become dependent on alcohol? Or that men account for 74% of hospital admissions for drug-related mental health issues?

Joining us is the brilliant Jessica Lahey, best selling author of *The Gift Of Failure* and *The Addiction Inoculation*. She joins Joeli and Elliott to tackle one of the toughest yet most vital topics for parents today: addiction.


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4 months ago
47 minutes 34 seconds

To Be A Boy
Socks, Strikes and Social Change

This week, Joeli and Elliott are still reeling from their chat with 15-year-old Josh Sargent, who somehow knows more about inflation, misogyny, and the internet than most adults do (and can spell “misogyny” without spellcheck). They unpack the impact of the online world on boys, the impossible balance of protecting kids while keeping them connected, and why critical thinking might just be the new superpower.

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5 months ago
36 minutes 33 seconds

To Be A Boy
Teenage Wisdom: Josh Sargent vs. The Manosphere

Ever wondered what teenage boys really think about the Manosphere? In this week’s enlightening episode we break new ground by speaking directly to someone who’s living it—15-year-old Josh Sargent. Josh isn’t just navigating GCSEs; he’s writing a book about the Manosphere, all while grappling with the dual life of consuming content privately at home and existing in a world where these topics are rarely discussed openly among peers.As ever – we’re reading through your amazing emails for ideas and insights – YOUR TEAM NEEDS YOU! Stay in touch at tobeaboyteam@gmail.com


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5 months ago
46 minutes 15 seconds

To Be A Boy
Ever wondered how to navigate raising boys in this bonkers world? Enter To Be A Boy', where hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae tackle the murky waters of masculinity and boyhood. From societal stereotypes to the influence of porn, they provide a candid take on raising well-rounded boys. Expect personal anecdotes, belly laughs, and deep dives as they dismantle harmful clichés and champion honest conversations. They explore male friendships, educational gaps, mental health struggles, and tough topics like male violence. Join the conversation for a supportive community with fun and heart.