The worst book of all worst books has entered the ring, listeners! If you haven’t heard Savanah complaining about The Notebook, you might be new around here. To summarize, we’ve got toxic love tropes, old people sex, and the incredible, incredible hubris of N*cholas Sp*rks. Plus, sexy abstract painting and how to know when it’s time to let go of that guy you dated for two months in middle school.

CW: Death

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Book rec: Get a Life Chloe Brown, Talia Hibbert. Non-book rec: Nimona, Noelle Stevenson.