Episode 04: Offenses Are Cooking By a Nose, By a Toe 🤥➕🦶

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The Whole Nine Yards

Milton and Vivian

162 episodes

5 days ago

From the office water cooler to the mic: Milton, Vivian, and the occasional special guest break down the intriguing world of the NFL, rant about our super competitive fantasy leagues, and the meaning of life after football.

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Episode 04: Offenses Are Cooking By a Nose, By a Toe 🤥➕🦶

The Whole Nine Yards

37 minutes 31 seconds

1 month ago

Episode 04: Offenses Are Cooking By a Nose, By a Toe 🤥➕🦶

The Vibe: Milton is riding high after a 4-2 week, fueled by a team built entirely of waiver wire mercenaries. It’s a beautiful chaos that’s working.

Weekend Blitz: A wild, record-setting week of football is in the books!

Giants vs. Cowboys (40-37): Absolute Cinema. A bonkers finish saw Russell Wilson (450 yds, 3 TDs) and Malik Nabers connect for a late TD, only for Brandon Aubrey to win it with a record-tying 64-yard FG as time expired.
Bills vs. Jets (30-10): Josh Allen (broken nose and all) did Josh Allen things. Justin Fields came crashing back to earth and is now in concussion protocol.
Patriots vs. Dolphins (33-27): Drake Maye looked fantastic, while Tua repeatedly overthrew a wide-open, visibly furious Tyreek Hill. The Antonio Brown quit watch is officially on.
Eagles vs. Chiefs (20-17): The Eagles won, and Jalen Hurts told a complaining Chris Jones to "shut your ass up." The Tush Push is beautiful football.
Lions vs. Bears (52-21): Ben Johnson ran up the score on his old team. The Bears are bad, but Rome Odunze is legit.
MNF Mess: The Bucs won on a last-second drive by Baker Mayfield, while the Chargers defense put the Raiders to bed early.

The News: The injury carousel spins on. Joe Burrow is on IR and needs turf toe surgery, out for at least 3 months. Justin Fields is in concussion protocol. Vikings QB JJ McCarthy is likely out with an ankle injury, making it the Carson Wentz show. Key defensive pieces like Bears CB Jaylon Johnson (groin, out for season) and Bucs DT Calijah Kancey (pectoral, out for season) are also done.

Off The Waivers: Your guide to the top pickups to save your season:

WR: Wan’Dale Robinson (NYG - target hog), Cedric Tillman (CLE - consistent targets), Troy Franklin (DEN - deep league stash)
RB: Quinshon Judkins (CLE - volume is here), Bhayshul Tuten (JAX - involved in Coen's offense), Trey Benson (ARI - passing-down role)
TE: Zach Ertz (WSH - tied with Terry in targets), Juwan Johnson (NO - TE3 so far), Harold Fannin(CLE - TE6 so far)
QB: Daniel Jones (NYG - must-roster in 2QB leagues after back-to-back 22+ point games)

First Read: A look ahead to Thursday Night Football: Dolphins at Bills (-12.5). With a banged-up Dolphins defense ranked 28th facing a Bills offense averaging 500 yards a game, this has the makings of a total demolition derby. Tune in to see if Mike McDaniel's seat gets even hotter.

Get your waivers ready, and as always, like and subscribe! And just like Joe Burrow's ligaments, we are DONE!