This is a lesson pulled from Adam Kreek's book called 'The Responsibility Ethic'. He talks about winning by inches. One inch at a time. I love this idea and its myriad applications. It's reminded me of my daughters attempting to overcome their fear of the dark the other day. The analogy continued, as the path to the lightswitch was down a set of stairs. So, like inch by inch, it was one stair at a time. Isn't this the way it always is? Slow and steady? Success is for the persistent. Growth is constant incremental improvement. There's a great lesson in that. Put on a helmet and jump into your fear!
Cover art by Alexander Milo
Going to bed early? Resisting the Himalayan salted kettle chips? Staying in good shape? How do we actually do these things? Who is able to? I think I finally realized the one thing that works. Accountability! If we can find the right people, who love us and therefore will tell us the truth, then we can tell them who we want to be, and they can point out when we act differently. It's startlingly simple in concept, and staggeringly hard in application. Go find some real friends, and create a reciprocal accountability agreement. I suppose this only applies if you want to grow and generate the impact of your pull potential. I've started down this challenging road, and I now believe it's really the only way to actually do what I know I should do. I say let's do it!
Cover art by Kobby Mendez
This is a story about my whole family painting the same picture, with an actual artist guiding us on youtube. Now, it turns out, we all had very different looking paintings in the end. My 3 year old has a better excuse than the rest of us. All our paintings were great, but only one looked the same as the youtube artist's. So, why is that? Only one actually followed the instructions, and yet they are all art. I wonder if there is a way to go through life with no instructions whatsoever? I also wonder if there is a way to only follow instructions, never deviating? I say no to both, but accept you could get close either way. While I happen to prefer the risks of very little instruction, I know many that are the opposite, and prefer the security of a more likely outcome. And that is just fine! We all get to choose when and from whom we will take our instructions, and when and from whom we will not! For those of you wanting to correct my use of 'whom', I probably won't take yours, just as I clearly didn't take the instruction from my english teachers!
Cover art by RhondaK
Things rarely go as planned. At least, not exactly as planned. But does that mean we don't make plans? No. Like the goals we aim at, we need plans for the process to their realization. When we look back, we may see that the route looked very different, and the achievement satisfies unlike we expected, often better; but without the plan, we get nothing we want or need. I learned this lesson again today, that along with the tangible plans and guiding documents, I need to prepare my mind. I need a plan to deal with Mr. Excuses. Doing that, in alignment with my ultimate purpose and mission, means I get to increase the likelihood that my goals come to fruition. Make some plans. Then make some more when you need to.
Cover art by Javier Allegue Barros
This Episode is for my oldest daughter. She brought me a variety of lessons today with her emotional response to the removing of the Christmas tree from the house. There was a teaching opportunity for me as a father, as well as a learning opportunity, for me as a father. I love it when those collide. I kind of botched it, so this episode is a promise to do better and the lesson learned! Enjoy each stage of the cycle that is baked into this life. Each section has its reason to celebrate. Beginnings, middles, and ends!
Cover art by Maarten Deckers
"I want the best and the cheapest..." Of course, who doesn't. This is me revisiting the age old question, is cheap actually cheap? It's not all that simple. I've learned some things about my own purchasing decisions on this front, and thought I'd share what I've learned. The point is, do what works for you. Cheap may be the best, but "cheap" will look different to all of us. Get a purchasing operating system for yourself so you don't get trapped like I still do, compromising and getting the less expensive option then regretting it!
Cover art by Kerry Rawlinson
Happy New Year! This is my favorite couple days of the year as I consider the past and look forward to the future. It feels like a 2nd chance, or another at bat. It's the best! A fresh start. This episode is in a way a re-introduction to what the Sheck Show is, and then some thoughts on what an honest look at 2020 has revealed for me. Onward!
Cover art by Lisanne van Elsen
This is a lesson I've learned the hard way, and seem to keep re-learning the hard way. One of the habits described in Stephen Covey's book, 'the seven habits of highly effective people', seek first to understand is a beast! I'm learning. And here are some of the things I've learned. Look for patterns, develop better responses to triggers, and set the right foundation for a positive and constructive disagreement. It's worthwhile work!
Cover art by Angela Hobbs
Marriage is one of my favorite topics. I'm fascinated by it on many levels, and respectful of it's power on many more. It's the best thing that's happened to me, and since I'm enjoying it so much, I figured I ought to share what I'm learning along the way. I know that not everyone shares my excitement about marriage, and that's fair. However, like everything in life, if we can make it a little better, we ought to. So here are a couple things that I figured would have been nice to read in the fine print of my marriage contract!
Cover art by Scott Webb
You may get somewhere by accident, but very rarely do you get where you want to go by accident. My opinion is that it is not worth risking, and since we can make goals, we should! Do they take time? Sure. So does wandering aimlessly with a compass of hope. Choose where you want to go and get after it. I'm learning how valuable this is and here are some reasons why.
Cover art by Annie Spratt
Life as an adult can often be a forgetting of the joy that jumping in a puddle can bring. Remember puddles? This is a story about being drawn to puddles, and some thoughts on why. Ultimately, it’s a simple thing, well placed in our path, and worthy of our attention. Jump in.
( cover art by Josh Calabrese )
There is a tendency to either beat yourself up as you blindly stumble through parenthood, or, pat yourself on the back when you see your kid finally apply the thing you've been telling them for years... In this episode I lay out my theory for when the parenting report card is ready for review. When is the right time to sit back and assess how you are doing as a parent? I say wait as long as you can!
( cover art by David Holifield )
What do you feel when the power goes out? When your big important project you're working on online suddenly goes black. Is it panic? Fear? Frustration? Maybe once in a while relief. For many of us, this is a minor inconvenience to our otherwise spoiled life. I took the opportunity to assess this during the last power outage, and it struck me how many things I take for granted in life. Heaps and heaps of good fortune and blessings that I enjoy daily go unnoticed until they are pointed out. I've got to enhance my habits of gratitude to give the giver of good fortune at least the daily 'thank you' he is due for the basics I assume will always be there.
(cover art by James Peacock )
We all know that being a hypocrite is not good. It is to be avoided at all costs. I had to have this lesson reinforced by my daughter when she was probably 4 or 5. Do not be guilty of the same behavior you are condemning! And, in the event you are caught guilty, accept your own punishment. It's the only way. (cover art by: Mark Stoop)
This is a lesson I learned about casual commitments, 'little' promises. I realized kids and clients alike, we must be careful what we say. Not only do they hear you, it's the little promise you make that they remember. So, from bike rides to shipping costs, be careful what you commit to, no matter how casual it feels to you.
One of the most used lessons I've received from a book is this one... The pause that refreshes. I got this out of Greg McKeown's book 'Essentialism". Fantastic book on so may levels, but this tiny little role shift hack has paid dividends for years! Put the car in park, take a breath, switch roles, and be your best. Here is Greg's website if you want to check it out: https://gregmckeown.com/book/
The getting and decorating of the Christmas tree is a pretty big deal around the Sheck household. I recall 3 years ago we took our couple week old baby out for the winter adventure. Irresponsible?? That depends on what "getting a Christmas tree" means. The lesson speak about in this episode may have been learned on one of these Christmas tree adventures of the past decade. That lesson? We aren't just getting a tree. It's sooo much more than that!
I've had the privilege of watching my 3 year old learning a new, very important, life skill... how to use a potty. As it turns out, the strategy used to help her, is the exact same strategy we continue to apply throughout all new skill development. So, yes, there is some tactical advice in here for parents, but it is really a metaphor for anyone attempting to learn a new skill. Get out the trail mix!
This is a story about me actually wanting to know how people are doing. That boring old question we mutter to each other all day turns out to be one of the deepest questions we can ask! So I ask it... but for real this time.
I describe the pure joy of the Honda Civic, as well as how it may be stroking my ego to drive such a car. This thought stemmed from a great book by Ryan Holiday called 'Ego is the Enemy'.