"We paused in front of the bed, where there was a display of red and white balloons." 🇫🇷🎈 I had my first romantic getaway in Paris. I was so concerned about discovering unflattering details about my new boyfriend that I had completely forgotten just how tricky I could be to travel with.   Visit | TheQuack.Blog Follow | MaryNewnhamWrites Sound | Soundstripe.com Preorder | Amy Elman Doesn't Feel Sexy

I couldn't risk wasting time on real men when I had fictional men to worry about.   This week, we continue the story writing the book. This is the part where I try to get an agent and fail at dating — also known as 'The Cringe Era'.   Listen to Parts 1 and 2 before this episode.   Visit | TheQuack.Blog  Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrites Skip Introduction | 3:15 Sound | Soundstripe.com   Preorder Amy Elman Doesn't Feel Sexy on Amazon

"I should have kids with names and a strong opinion on Peppa Pig, but somehow, at 34, I have found myself back in London..."   This week is about my move back to London as a 34-year-old. After leaving with a bad taste in my mouth at 26 (which inspired me to write a terrible poetry book), I never thought I'd come back to live in The Big Smoke, but here I am... maybe it's where I was supposed to be all along.      Visit | TheQuack.Blog Preorder | Amy Elman Doesn't Feel Sexy Follow | MaryNewnhamWrites Sound | Soundstripe.com  

"Oh, Mary, Mary, Mary, how do you expect to be a published author if you can't even score a high grade on a short story?"   This week on The Quack, we continue the series 'The Story of Writing a Novel.' I head back to university to do a Master's in creative writing. There is a drama involving my Metamorphosis book and a sharp learning curve about verbs.    Preorder Amy Elman Doesn't Feel Sexy. Visit | TheQuack.blog Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrites Sound | Soundstripe.com Link to Guardian article   

 'That’s right, I thought in my haze, I have a boyfriend now.' On this week's Quack, I celebrated my 34th birthday by taking my new boyfriend to his very first spa. Unfortunately, it was not the relaxing experience I had promised...   Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit | TheQuack.blog Music | Soundstripe.com CLICK HERE TO PRE-ORDER AMY ELMAN DOESN'T FEEL SEXY 

This month has been a bit chaotic, so I will be returning on September 17th with more facepalm stories. Thank you guys! x

It seemed barbaric, and yet, she was so casual about it, as if she were demonstrating how to season a chicken.   With the help of Reddit reviews, I'm choosing my next birth control method. This episode also includes some seriously great ideas for male contraceptives.    If you want to know more about birth control, click here.   Skip Introduction| 2:04 Sound | soundstripe.com Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit | TheQuack.Blog   Pre-order my debut fiction book, AMY ELMAN DOESN'T FEEL SEXY, on Amazon.   

"It would be called Can of Worms. Sunday Times Bestseller list, here I come."   In this first episode of the series, I am going back to the very beginning when I attempted my first novel.    Skip Introduction | 2:21 Visit | TheQuack.Blog Sound | Soundstripe.com Preorder Amy Elman Doesn't Feel Sexy on Amazon and other popular book stores. 

I made the mistake of asking Dad, “But do billboards actually work?” I may as well have asked if Tottenham Hotspur was a synchronised swimming team.   This week is about growing up in an 80s advertising family and working out what my dad did for work.    Skip Intro | 2:11 Visit | TheQuack.Blog Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrites Sound| Soundstripe.com

"The turnout was 50 girls and 10 terrified boys..."   This week is a flashback to my 2010 school prom...which wasn't anything like the ones in the movies.    Skip Introduction | 2:27 Follow me | @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit | TheQuack.Blog Sound | Soundstripe.com    

"I then remembered it wasn't football, so these grown-ups could be trusted not to punch each other in the face..."    I went to the rugby final on Saturday, which made me reflect on my football upbringing.   Skip Introduction | 2:05 Sound | Soundstripe.com Follow | @marynewnhamwrites Visit | TheQuack.blog  

“STOP! I LEFT THE CHEESE!” We twisted around and punted back to the boathouse to collect the cheese. 🧀   It's Hermione's birthday, and this year we all went punting in Oxford. I made the mistake of getting in the wrong boat....   Skip Introduction | 1:38 Follow | @MaryNewnhamWrite Read | TheQuack.Blog Sound | Soundstripe.com  

"I was biting into my vegetable kebab when I received a message from the Hinge bloke. I read the top line and rolled my eyes..."   It's been over a year since I've been on Hinge, but I'm now back on the dating horse. This is the story of my first online dating experience of 2025.    Skip Introduction | 1:50 Read | TheQuack.blog Follow | @marynewnhamwrites Sound | Soundstripe.com  

"I did wonder, as I was walking around the Eiffel Tower in a red dress, whether, perhaps, I had watched too many movies..."   This week on The Quack, I reflect on the face-palm moments from my recent girls' trip to France. Includes a desperate scene of me trying to create a romantic moment by the Eiffel Tower, a game of charades with the Airbnb host, and an AI song about tariffs.   Skip Introduction| 2:09 Follow me|  @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit | TheQuack.blog Sound | Soundstripe.com

"3 days into the challenge, I realised I wasn't the dazzling compliment giver I originally thought I was."   For Lent, instead of giving up cherry cola Tic-Tacs, I challenged myself to compliment 40 strangers in 40 days. Today, I have the results of how it went. (Not well).   Thank you for continuing to support. I have a few deadlines coming up, and so for now, The Quack will be coming out once a fortnight until life gets a little less crazy. On the plus side, I have some exciting novel news, which I will announce very soon. MN x   Visit | THEQUACK.BLOG Follow| @marynewnhamwrites Sound | Soundstripe.com

"Have sex with them. I find they stop laughing at your jokes once they've seen your nipples."   The sun is out, and couples are uncuffing, ready for their hot single summer. As an expert singleton, I have a few tips to share...   Skip Introduction | 2:22 Visit | TheQuack.Blog Follow me | @marynewnhamwrites Sound | Soundstripe.com  

"Are you literally carrying around a focaccia?” Last Thursday night, I went out with my science friends. It was a typical night for any friendship group in their 30s, except (as this is The Quack) there were some face-palm moments.    Skip Introduction | 1:28 Follow me | @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit | TheQuack.Blog Sound | Soundstripe.com If you're in London, you must watch News Revue | Link here  

"I watched with astonishment as boys clumsily worked out that the humour which impressed their mates wasn't necessarily the humour that impressed us girls..."   As it was April Fool's this week, I thought I would explore the differences in humour between men and women, particularly when pranking.   Skip Introduction | 2:01 Follow me on the Gram | @marynewnhamwrites Visit | The Quack Sound | Soundstripe.com

"Like reaching for a diet book when you’re unsatisfied with your body, I leaned into self-help because I was frustrated with my personality."   This week's muddled observation is about the self-improvement industry and how I used it during my quatre-life crisis.    Skip Introduction | 3:13 Follow Me on Instagram | @marynewnhamwrites Visit Me | THEQUACK.BLOG Sound | Soundstripe.com     Sources https://www.zionmarketresearch.com/report/self-improvement-market

“Let me show you something that will make your ovaries twerk.”   This week on The Quack, I contemplate motherhood and whether it is right for me after being traumatised by my 90's singing doll. Also, I take the time to admire the hot dads of the world.    🎈 HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY TO AUDIO QUACK 🎈   Skip Intro | 2:21 Follow me on IG @MaryNewnhamWrites Visit and subscribe to The Quack Blog Sound credits | Soundstripe.com