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The Northern Aggression Podcast
Marshall and Gunter
40 episodes
3 days ago
The Northern Aggression Podcast isn’t for the easily offended. Hosted by Marshall, a sharp-tongued Chicagoan with zero filter, and Gunter, the Southern counterpart who keeps things just unhinged enough, this podcast takes on everything—and we mean everything. No topic is safe, no opinion is sugarcoated, and no one gets a free pass. If you can’t handle the heat, this ain’t the show for you.
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The Northern Aggression Podcast isn’t for the easily offended. Hosted by Marshall, a sharp-tongued Chicagoan with zero filter, and Gunter, the Southern counterpart who keeps things just unhinged enough, this podcast takes on everything—and we mean everything. No topic is safe, no opinion is sugarcoated, and no one gets a free pass. If you can’t handle the heat, this ain’t the show for you.
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Comedy
Episodes (20/40)
The Northern Aggression Podcast
Marshall's 500lb Vanity
This week, Marshall and Gunter suffer through a painful sound check and immediately spiral. Marshall has a bold (read: ridiculous) rebrand idea for Cleveland’s baseball team—he thinks they should be called the Wahoos. Gunter reminds him that a career in marketing may not be in his future. Marshall rants about baseball anyway, because that’s what he does. Meanwhile, the saga of the bathroom remodel continues—and it’s not going great. They ordered a new vanity, but the delivery guy dropped it in the street while Marshall watched in horror. The silver lining? Marshall loved the hold music while dealing with Home Depot customer service. It’s the little things. Gunter accuses Marshall of being weirdly soft on Germany—except when it comes to their cars. That’s where he draws the line. Gunter says Marshall just has too much faith in humanity… which prompts a MySpace tangent, naturally. It’s chaos, construction, and questionable branding choices—so, basically, a classic episode.
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3 days ago
27 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Spoonerism
Marshall has two topics this time, which obviously means we’re going to cover at least twelve. First, Gunter dives into her latest guilty pleasure: the “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook group. One post in particular caught her eye—someone asked, “Is there a way to tell if my husband is gay?” Marshall and Gunter go all in on the comments, the chaos, and why this question exists in that group to begin with. They’ve also just returned from vacation—Utah, so yes, this goes off the rails quickly. Gunter’s trying to confirm if “soaking” is a real thing (Marshall reacts as expected). Marshall shares the unholy sounds of their cruise ship balcony and is now officially excused from all future seafaring. Somehow, they circle back to the infamous hot dog casserole, Gunter’s refusal to eat bread crusts, and their memories of food in Japan. Marshall was into the high-tech showers, not so much the sea creatures. The episode wraps with a roasting of a HuffPost dating article, a live Spoonerism debate, a disagreement on how old Marshall actually is, and an AI tirade where—you may not expect it—but the phrase “shock mounted toilet” makes an appearance. Just another day in the world of Northern Aggression.
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1 week ago
33 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Learning and Las Vegas
Marshall and Gunter hit the road again—and it’s somehow a wellness episode? Kind of. Marshall says he wants to talk about mental health… but immediately warns you that if you have mental health issues, maybe skip this one. A comforting start. Gunter tries to explain ASMR and TikTok trends, and Marshall reacts exactly like someone who gets angry about soft voices and slime videos. He can’t stand anything millennial-adjacent and doesn’t understand K-pop, which—shocker—Gunter takes issue with. She also blames him for teaching her how to tell if it’s raining in the distance. Marshall is oddly passionate about distant rainfall. Marshall admits, begrudgingly, that he’s learned things from Gunter and is embarrassed by most of them. That’s when the designer brand rage kicks in. Flashbacks to Vegas emerge: banana pendants, Showgirls references, and Marshall being deeply offended by anything that costs more than $11.99. He’s mad at millennial trends. He’s mad at luxury. He might be mad at Gunter. Honestly, we think he’s just mad at Las Vegas.
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2 weeks ago
31 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Hashbrown Casserole, it's not that hard
Marshall and Gunter take not one—but two—trips to Cracker Barrel, and somehow both descend into chaos. Marshall attempts to describe the Cracker Barrel experience but ends up likening it to prison. All he wanted was hashbrown casserole. That’s it. Instead? Catfish. His southern dreams were crushed. He rants about Southern traditions, the downfall of Cracker Barrel’s aesthetic, and the rise of Gen Z names (what do they have to do with this? Unclear, but Marshall connects the dots). Gunter tries to help Marshall refine his casserole-ordering strategy, but when the server skips drink orders entirely on their second trip, it’s clear they’re cursed. They find themselves surrounded by tables of elderly diners and Marshall becomes irrationally enraged by someone’s “special water” request. His food order is wrong—again—but at least he dominated the golf tee triangle game. That’s a win? Marshall then spirals into a casserole tirade—apparently all casseroles are gross… except hashbrown. Gunter defends breakfast casseroles, which sends Marshall into a Porsche-related jab about the price of eggs and her luxury lifestyle. Just another wholesome trip to America’s favorite country store.
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3 weeks ago
28 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
You're Not Clean Until You're Bidet Clean
Marshall and Gunter are planning a bathroom remodel—and surprise! It quickly spirals into chaos. Marshall starts by raging about how we’re not supposed to call it the “master” bathroom anymore. Gunter’s dream bathroom includes a luxurious Japanese toilet with all the bells and bidet whistles, but Marshall is not on board—especially with the heated seat and the price tag. He accuses her of going full bougie, especially after the car situation. Marshall’s confused about how a toilet can cost thousands. Gunter tries to explain, but he’s already launched into a soggy toilet paper rant. While she dreams of spa-like comfort, he just wants to play Solitaire and be left alone. That doesn’t stop him from spiraling into a bit about weird body product ads (are they lotions or desserts?), his distrust of McDonald’s self-order kiosks, and his lasting anger over missing Shamrock Shakes. Meanwhile, Gunter’s TikTok obsession with a Mercedes salesperson sends Marshall into a tailspin—and we learn he knows way more about luxury cars than he wants to admit. Also, Marshall now wants a t-shirt cannon for their nonexistent merch. Priorities.
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1 month ago
29 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Bras and Body Snatchers
Gunter accuses Marshall of airing her dirty laundry—though Marshall argues he does all the laundry anyway. He recounts a tale of someone else’s childhood trauma (don’t worry, no pickles for him) and blames Gunter for chaos on the road just because she’s in the car. Gunter is missing a favorite shirt, Marshall’s ranting about bras, and—shocker—he’s taking jabs at uncles again. We meet Elder Marshall (Marshall’s dad), and let’s just say the apple didn’t fall far. Neither of them can call anything by the correct name or have a conversation without veering wildly off course. Gunter attempts to referee their baffling logic—especially during their debate about afterlife plans. Turns out, there are tiers of body snatchers and, yes, you can compost yourself and have your family pick up the dirt. You’re not ready for this one.
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1 month ago
28 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Bonus Episode: It Was Supposed To Be A Trailer
What was supposed to be a simple Season 3 trailer turned into—well, a full episode. Gunter just wanted Marshall to record a short intro, but he went completely rogue. Instead of keeping it short and sweet, he dives into what’s coming up in Season 3, tosses in a few rants, and then gets nerdy about fonts. Yes, fonts. Specifically, how Greek letters show up differently depending on which one you use. Gunter did not sign up for this level of typographic chaos, but here we are. It’s a “trailer” in name only—classic Northern Aggression.
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1 month ago
30 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Bonus Episode: One Glowing Finger
Gunter opens by calling Marshall out for not even knowing what time they launch the podcast each week. That sends him straight into a rant about daylight savings versus standard time. From there, it’s a grab bag of grievances: coworkers, kids, and just about everything else that irritates him. Marshall also shares some work horror stories—this time about bathroom plumbing disasters you can’t unhear. Naturally, the conversation detours into his favorite topic: performance reviews. (Yes, he has a lot of thoughts.) And just when you think it couldn’t get more off the rails, Marshall and Gunter end with a debate for the ages: who’s the better pilot—astronaut John Young or Jesus? Rants, reviews, plumbing nightmares, and religious aviation—just another day with Northern Aggression.
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1 month ago
48 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Bonus Episode: Athlessional
Marshall and Gunter head to Panera for a casual dinner and stumble across a newspaper with an advice column. This week’s lucky subject is “Kyle,” who’s trying to figure out how to transition from remote work back to the office. Naturally, Marshall has thoughts about the recommendations—and they’re not exactly HR-approved. From there, the conversation wanders (as it always does). Marshall rants about women wearing sleeveless shirts at work, Gunter takes aim at athleisure offenders, and Marshall coins a brand-new term that Gunter immediately hates. What started with soup and bread bowls ends up somewhere no one expected. Classic Northern Aggression.
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1 month ago
36 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Bonus Episode: Traylor Trash
What was supposed to be a short bonus episode… wasn’t. Marshall and Gunter dive into Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift’s engagement, which sets Marshall off on a rant about Taylor calling herself “the English teacher.” Naturally, this leads to his own English class memories, while Gunter confesses her lifelong betrayal by words growing up in the rural South. From there, the twists and turns get wild—Larry Nassar, Bryan Kohberger, prison treatment, Gunter’s Botox (again), and more callbacks to old episodes than anyone asked for. There are even a few teasers for Season 3 tucked in along the way. It’s long-winded, messy, and exactly what you’d expect: a chaotic bonus ride.
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2 months ago
55 minutes

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Season 2 is a wrap! Thank you!
Thanks for sticking with us through Season 2 of Northern Aggression! We’ve had a blast bringing the chaos, the rants, and the questionable life advice your way. We’ll be back soon with Season 3, and trust us—we’ve got plenty of unhinged stories, hot takes, and nonsense in store. Stay tuned… you won’t want to miss it.
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2 months ago
5 minutes 56 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
The Conceit of Language
Marshall is already riled up—with rage and a fresh rant about word fragments. He’s got strong feelings about bar soap (he likes them plain, not fancy), and yes, he’s read a book about dictionaries. Gunter accuses him of reading a book about everything, which makes buying him new ones nearly impossible. Marshall dives into Gen Z slang, enigma machines, and jean rises, and Gunter calls him out for being a mathlete. They trade jabs over bird knowledge, situational awareness, and recognizing when someone’s being hit on—spoiler: Gunter wins that round. Marshall shares a story about rejecting a woman’s invitation to dance and makes a bold claim about porn helping move information across the internet. Naturally, that somehow leads to a tangent about planes and astronaut John Young. Just another day in the chaos.
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2 months ago
31 minutes 8 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Hexapus
Word’s getting out—people Marshall and Gunter work with are starting to ask about the podcast. Meanwhile, Marshall needs something explained to him (again). Today’s topic? Whole body deodorant. He’s convinced it exists because no one bathed during the pandemic. Gunter tries to clarify, but Marshall accuses her of being unable to explain anything clearly—which launches a chaotic tangent about girls Gunter went to high school with and their differing takes on certain... activities. There’s a whole debate about not getting it in your hair (yes, really). Even Marshall’s mom liked Wild Things, and somehow Creed makes an appearance too. Marshall also doesn’t understand men’s skincare and questions a bizarre product that weaves into your shoelaces—something he calls a “hexapus.” Gunter’s fighting a losing battle, and Marshall admits he’s not exactly a DIY guy. Just another normal episode of pure nonsense.
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2 months ago
29 minutes 7 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
The Angry German
Gunter’s been test-driving what Marshall calls “boug-mobiles,” and somehow things immediately spiral. Marshall hates modern car manuals, makes a religious joke mid-test drive, and casually tells a salesman the trunk is big enough to fit his body. (Spoiler: they were not amused.) Gunter gets called out for her driving, Marshall roasts her again, and they both agree they probably didn’t look like they could afford the cars anyway. We also hear about Marshall’s mom and her strong German sensibilities. Buckle up—just don’t let Marshall behind the wheel.
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3 months ago
26 minutes 24 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Delightful Frothy Puke
Marshall kicks things off with a warning: this episode contains adult content (which… yeah, fair). Gunter calls him out for declaring yet another ”very special episode.” Marshall had a dream he had to get on tape, and the results are predictably unhinged. They take a detour into pandemic memories, uninvited invitations, and Marshall’s deep (and disturbing) appreciation for Shamrock Shakes. Apparently, he thinks vomiting one is a “delightful” experience. Gunter is baffled, per usual. Marshall shares the time he was hit on and totally missed it—until his friends pointed it out in real time. Nothing makes sense, and that somehow makes total sense.
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3 months ago
25 minutes 29 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
I Hate Illinois Nazis
Marshall had a dream… and Gunter died. But don’t worry—there was a spreadsheet involved. Gunter calls him out for not being that devastated, and somehow ends up being accused of being Welsh. Again. They talk Dateline, death, and math (but not “fancy math,” Marshall insists). Gunter wins the calculus argument. Marshall shares his spiritual connection to The Blues Brothers and demands to know why we can’t make fun of stupid things anymore. It’s chaos, but it’s organized chaos—because there’s probably a spreadsheet for it.
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3 months ago
24 minutes 10 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Prepping the Welsh
Marshall’s got gripes—this time it’s Gen Z, drug names, and German cars. He swears he’s not talking politics, but we go from Bernie Mac to Jimmy Carter in under two minutes. Gunter just wants to tell a story, but Marshall’s relentless interruptions make it a team effort. He’s mad Gunter doesn’t give him breaking news. She’s confused about what article they’re even discussing. And yes, Marshall’s coming for the Welsh again (because of course he is). We also finally ask the world’s most important question: who’s worse—the Welsh or the French? Marshall claims to be panlingual. Sure, buddy.
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3 months ago
24 minutes 14 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Penises and Popscicles
Marshall opens strong with his usual disclaimer—he claims no responsibility. Gunter’s got penis questions inspired by TikTok videos, and somehow Ding Dongs, Twinkies, and squash become part of the conversation. Things immediately go off the rails. Marshall recounts Gunter falling at the Arizona Capitol (just one incident in a long résumé of clumsiness). There’s outrage over banana popsicles getting their own box, Southern analogies, and a disturbing revelation about what Marshall’s mom thinks of when she hears the word novelties. Absolutely nothing is safe in this episode.
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4 months ago
22 minutes 44 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
Marshmallows for Dinner
Marshall is once again confused why anyone thinks this podcast is funny—but hey, here we are. Gunter debuts a new designer purse, and Marshall roasts it with zero knowledge of labels or prices (she’s not telling anyway). Gunter spills the time Marshall frog-hopped into Walmart. We also learn that Marshall’s old boss tried to fix him with public speaking classes. Spoiler: it didn’t work. There’s malicious compliance, chicken tender sauce debates, and a traumatic McNugget origin story. Marshall insists Gunter should be cooking for him, while Gunter just calls him boring. Also: men searching the skies for flying objects is somehow relevant. And whatever you do, don’t miss Marshall’s encouragement to search “Benny Hinn + Let the Bodies Hit the Floor.” You’re welcome.
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4 months ago
30 minutes 11 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
The Funny Uncle
Marshall and Gunter recount getting stared down at dinner—probably because their religion convo went one bridge too far. Marshall has a bold vision for a mega church empire, while Gunter sees $$$ and Marshall calls her indulgent. There’s talk of fun uncles vs. funny uncles, but Gunter can’t seem to explain much without spiraling. They take you on a fashion-judging tour of Walmart, where Gunter has to explain dude wipes to a horrified Marshall (brace yourself). Throw in a rant about workplace benefits, and you’ve got an episode that definitely needs a warning label.
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4 months ago
25 minutes 48 seconds

The Northern Aggression Podcast
The Northern Aggression Podcast isn’t for the easily offended. Hosted by Marshall, a sharp-tongued Chicagoan with zero filter, and Gunter, the Southern counterpart who keeps things just unhinged enough, this podcast takes on everything—and we mean everything. No topic is safe, no opinion is sugarcoated, and no one gets a free pass. If you can’t handle the heat, this ain’t the show for you.