Hey, homeschoolers! Are you overwhelmed? Is it embarrassing to be overwhelmed this early in the year? I can empathize. I've been feeling the same way, even though I'm a homeschool business owner and not teaching this fall. I asked the Lord for wisdom and I wrote down three steps we can take to get out of overwhelm now. I already feel so much better after taking them, and I pray that you will too.
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What Overwhelm Really Is
To begin, let's clarify what we mean by overwhelm. First, it's not a true crisis. If you've just been in a car accident or your parent just had a heart attack, your response to that is stress and shock that may feel overwhelming, but that's not the kind of overwhelm I'm talking about. Plus, if you're in a true crisis, I doubt you're listening to me now!
Instead, overwhelm is when we respond to life circumstances as though they were a true crisis. Our kid hates the Spanish class we signed them up for. The kids keep arguing. We didn't get through the 20 different curricula we thought we could cover in a day. We forgot to put dinner in the crockpot and the dog just rolled in mud.
Overwhelm feels like everything is going wrong, but it is really garden-variety anxiety. I didn't realize that overwhelm is just anxiety until I felt overwhelmed myself this week. But I am well aware of how we tend to respond to anxiety. When we're anxious, we avoid. If crowds make us anxious, we avoid them. Elevators, avoid. Algebra, avoid. Obvious, right? So what does that look like with overwhelm?
We avoid the anxiety of overwhelm in multiple ways. First, we distract ourselves. We doomscroll, watch a show, or eat chocolate. If you're like me, you do all three. Next, we try something new to avoid the anxiety of overwhelm. We research new curriculum. New curriculum will fix everything, we are sure. We may think that a whole new approach to homeschooling is the answer, so we start reading and watching YouTube videos. Or we decide that now is the pefect time to start a business and we spend time working on that. When the anxiety of overwhelm is severe, we may decide that we have to stop something. We may think we aren't cut out for homeschooling. We start looking into other options. We may consider dropping out of a co-op or leadership role.
And it's possible that some of these avoidance responses could create positive change, but they are all reactions to anxiety and not carefully considered. I finally understand why I start a new hobby, dive head first into a new business idea, or try a new productivity approach when I'm already overwhelmed. It's my way of avoiding anxiety.
If you've ever heard me talk about anxiety, you know what I always say: avoiding makes anxiety worse, not better. If crowds make you anxious and you avoid them, pretty soon you'll consider your in-laws and even your church a crowd that you need to avoid. Fortunately, there is another way out of overwhelm.
Step 1. Do the next thing.
You've likely heard the poem by the same title made popular by Elisabeth Elliott. I'm going to read it for you again so we can truly take it in.
From an old English parsonage down by the sea There came in the twilight a message to me; Its quaint Saxon legend, deeply engraven, Hath, it seems to me, teaching from Heaven. And on through the doors the quiet words ring Like a low inspiration: “DO THE NEXT THING.”
