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The Attachment Trap: From Chaos to Calm: Dating, Attachment and Real Love.
Tim Ervin
17 episodes
4 days ago
The Attachment Trap Podcast Hosted by therapist and author Tim Ervin, this podcast unpacks dating, love, and the nervous system one story at a time. Based on the book The Attachment Trap: Loving Without Losing Yourself, each episode helps you understand your attachment patterns, stop chasing unavailable love, and date with clarity and calm. If you’ve ever spiraled after a text or felt “too much,” you’re not broken, you’re wired for survival. Learn how to rewrite the script and finally feel safe in connection. Grab the book on Amazon, available in both Kindle and paperback.
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Self-Improvement
Education
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All content for The Attachment Trap: From Chaos to Calm: Dating, Attachment and Real Love. is the property of Tim Ervin and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
The Attachment Trap Podcast Hosted by therapist and author Tim Ervin, this podcast unpacks dating, love, and the nervous system one story at a time. Based on the book The Attachment Trap: Loving Without Losing Yourself, each episode helps you understand your attachment patterns, stop chasing unavailable love, and date with clarity and calm. If you’ve ever spiraled after a text or felt “too much,” you’re not broken, you’re wired for survival. Learn how to rewrite the script and finally feel safe in connection. Grab the book on Amazon, available in both Kindle and paperback.
Show more...
Self-Improvement
Education
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Episode 11: Boundaries Without Burnout How to Say No Without Losing Connection
The Attachment Trap: From Chaos to Calm: Dating, Attachment and Real Love.
10 minutes 33 seconds
2 months ago
Episode 11: Boundaries Without Burnout How to Say No Without Losing Connection

Saying no can feel terrifying, especially if your nervous system learned early on that love depended on compliance, helpfulness, or keeping the peace. In this episode, Tim Ervin unpacks why boundaries are so hard, how sitcom characters like Monica (Friends), Leslie (Parks and Rec), and Pam (The Office) hilariously show us our own struggles, and most importantly, how to set limits that protect connection instead of breaking it.

  • Sitcom moments with Monica (Friends), Leslie (Parks and Rec), and Pam (The Office) show how hard it can be to say no.

  • Why Boundaries Feel Hard: How Childhood Patterns Teach Your Nervous System That Saying 'Yes' Equals Safety, and 'No' Feels Like Danger.

  • Pop Culture Stories: From 27 Dresses to Ron Swanson (Parks and Rec), exploring the contrast between people-pleasing chaos and calm, guilt-free no’s.

  • The Nervous System Cost of Fake Yeses: How resentment, anxiety, shutdown, and burnout show up in your body when you ignore your limits.

  • Three Steps to Boundaries Without Burnout: Getting clear on your needs, practicing a gentle no, and separating connection from compliance.

  • Tool of the Week: The Boundary Breath: A simple breath practice to check whether your yes comes from joy or guilt.

  • Reflection Prompts: Journaling questions to help you notice where you’re over-giving and practice safe no’s.

  • The Nervous System Shift: Why real boundaries protect connection instead of breaking it.

The Attachment Trap: From Chaos to Calm: Dating, Attachment and Real Love.
The Attachment Trap Podcast Hosted by therapist and author Tim Ervin, this podcast unpacks dating, love, and the nervous system one story at a time. Based on the book The Attachment Trap: Loving Without Losing Yourself, each episode helps you understand your attachment patterns, stop chasing unavailable love, and date with clarity and calm. If you’ve ever spiraled after a text or felt “too much,” you’re not broken, you’re wired for survival. Learn how to rewrite the script and finally feel safe in connection. Grab the book on Amazon, available in both Kindle and paperback.