In this episode of The Adults’ Table, we dive into one of the hardest lessons in relationships: accepting people for who they are — not who we wish they’d be.

Whether it’s in friendships, partnerships, or group dynamics, we often exhaust ourselves expecting others to mirror our efforts, give what we give, or show up the way we do.

But the truth is: people give what they have to give. And sometimes, they just don’t have what we’re asking for.

I talk about why understanding this can save you frustration, how to stop keeping score, how to own your role in a group, and how to communicate your needs without expecting others to change. Oh, and yes — I use a snake and a dog metaphor. Don’t judge me ’til you hear it.

00:00 People give what they have to give

01:27 Group roles

02:45 Embrace your role (if you’re good at it)

04:18 “Accept it, and it will hurt less”

07:42 Let people deal with consequences

09:31 Accepting isn’t the same as allowing

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