The story you tell others and yourself about your experiences in life begin with your ANS. It is helpful to practice how you shape your story. Take a minor irritation that you experienced and try telling it from the Safe and Connected State, the Fight or Flight state, and or Dorsal Vagal. You are the protagonist in your life story. You make choices. One of the choices you make is the story you tell yourself. The more habituated your story telling is the more likely you will fall into the traps of black and white or a perpetrator/victim stance, win/lose.