In an UNPRECEDENTED COLLABORATION, generous and charming host Izzy Naud (https://izzynaudwellbeing.com/) of Sound Mind Sound Body was kind enough to allow me to share the interview (her interviewing me, oulala) that we recorded for her wonderful show with you, the Sober Sex audience. We talk about consent, the music industry and recovery. I talk incessantly and I apologize for leaving you hanging for a couple of months. Big thanks to the audience who participated!
Check out Izzy's work and Sound Mind Sound Body via her website and socials!
Brooks Herr is my favorite.
They are also a witch, artist and practitioner/educator of emotional and spiritual care. The guiding core of their practice is a passion for intuitive listening as a gateway to accessing empowerment, authenticity and responsiveness to the needs of our communities and our world.
For some context, Brooks was a pretty recent guest on the show and that conversation was so awesome that it proved us to start collaborating on a project surrounding how to process grief, or how to use it as a tool of liberation in the context of 12 step recovery. I am beyond thrilled to invite Brooks back to Sober Sex.
Mischa Byruck is a men’s integrity coach. He specializes in handling public callouts and cancellations and has supported over 100 clients to take accountability for harm and return to their lives transformed. We are thrilled to welcome Mischa to Sober Sex.
Find out more about Mischa and his awesome work at https://www.evolve.men/
Sam Bailey is a sober person who is committed to improving the quality of life and wellbeing of all Trans, Non-Binary and Intersex people. They work as Care Navigator at the Clare Project, a charity in Sussex, UK, dedicated to affirming and supporting TNBI people . Sam is also an auricular acupuncturist focusing on serving people in recovery. I am thrilled to welcome Sam to Sober Sex.
Tom Krasny is a queer, trans, neuro-divergent Glasgow based artist and organizer who is passionate about non oppressive ways of relating.
Tom’s work sits on the seam between art and activism, and centers consent as a valuable orientation to collectively learn and practice new skills and tools that allow us to explore relationship to self, others and the world around us with humility and curiosity.
TW: This episode briefly mentions physical self harm (referring to The Banshees of Inisherin) and uses the word 'rape', so if you aren't comfortable with these topics, perhaps it would be wise choose a different episode to listen to .
"Post conversation clarification:
Between minutes 31:42-41:55, Louisa and Tom discuss how to navigate contrasting feelings and perceptions between different sides in a relationship.
Tom wants to make it clear that the way in which we discuss differences in perception, is relevant in relationships that are based on trust and a mutual commitment to continous growth and care for all parties.
It does not apply to:
-abusive situations (where one person manipulates and opresses another)
-situations where there is an extreme cultural or institutional bias that negates minority perceptions, due to sexism, racism, pathologisation, ableism, and a lack of awareness to trauma informed care. This bias can lead to silencing and invalidation of minority experiences and perspectives.
In the above cases, external and skilled support is recommended and weight should be given to how power structures inform and uphold boundary violations of marginalized individuals.
Street Fever is a versatile, mixed-media performance-artist residing in Boise, Idaho.
Rooted in an ongoing spiritual awakening, Street Fever has been on a wildly cinematic path to better understand themselves as an artist, spiritual seeker, and human being. After losing all their possessions, being institutionalized multiple times and nearly losing their life in a South East Asian prison, this project has since been reborn and aims to use it as a platform to speak on their own recovery and addiction. Now more than ever they are empowered to share their story in hopes to connect with others who are seeking personal and spiritual growth.
You can find them at: https://www.instagram.com/streetfever
Laura is a Toronto native who has been based in Amsterdam for 5 years. She started cuddling professionally with a small client base during COVID and launched her business Lekker Cuddles officially in March 2021.
Laura’s aim with Lekker Cuddles is to normalize platonic intimacy and prove to people that physical and emotional vulnerability does not have to be reserved for a romantic partner. As one of the first cuddle therapists in NL, it was a long (and sometimes annoying) road of familiarizing the public with the concept. After three years, the mainstream in NL are becoming more accepting of the concept and Lekker Cuddles is remains an industry leader in the push to normalize a more vulnerable and intimate culture!
Aarij Abbas (he/they) is a queer, South Asian-American sexual health educator based on the stolen land of the Ojibwe, Odawa and Potowatomi tribes, colonized as Chicago, IL. Aarij creates spaces of trust and community for people to freely explore concepts of sexuality, gender and relationships. Their work is informed by the idea that: A) humans are, by nature, sexual beings, B) Most humans are developmentally repressed when it comes to navigating sexuality and C) bridging this knowledge gap is key to fighting systems of oppression and creating communities of love and care. His approach is one of acceptance and compassion, meeting people wherever they are on their journey to sexual liberation.
You can find out more about Aarij and what they offer at https://www.aarijabbas.com/
Last Episode of 2023!
Marcus Barnes is a man of many talents: an author, journalist, copy writer, mentor and coach dedicated to being a progressive force in the world of writing, especially surrounding music, culture and mental health. It’s a joy to talk to Marcus today on Sober Sex.
You can find out more about Marcus on his socials @mgoldenbarnes
Lael Atkinson is a certified professional recovery coach who works at the intersection of drinking and dieting. During their experience of parting ways with alcohol and then tackling a lifetime of dieting, disordered eating and body shame, they found limited resources that addressed this frequent overlap of ‘shrinking and drinking’. This led Lael to create a course and to specialize in supporting clients who want to examine their relationship with alcohol and divest from diet. Culture. We are thrilled to welcome Lael to Sober Sex.
https://learning.beyondshrinkinganddrinking.com/courses/BSD
https://www.laelatkinson.com/
Brooke Herr is a multi-talented education, healer and holder of space for ceremony, including but not limited to: grief work, tarot, somatic & energy work. Brooke draws inspiration from reserves as vast and profound as witchcraft, ancestor work, art practices and consent and coaching frameworks. It is a pleasure and a privilege to welcome Brooke to Sober Sex today.
at https://www.instagram.com/veils.veils.veils/
or sign up for the four week 'Grief with Brooke' course at:
Meet Sharlene Durfey Francois, a creative force who seamlessly weaves art and human connection into the fabric of her life. Sharlene's multi-faceted portfolio reflects her passion, creativity and talent across many artistic media, including photography, fashion, lighting, graphic design and illustration.
In creating the Intimacy Cards, Sharlene’s skill as a connector truly sets this project apart from her others. They are a testament to her deep understanding of the intricate threads that bind people together. These cards focus on three essential types of intimacy - Emotional, Physical, and Energetic - which Sharlene believes are the cornerstones of building truly meaningful connections. By gamifying intimacy and not focusing on the over-sexualized definition of the word, she makes connecting with others easy and accessible. Giving everyone, not just couples, an opportunity to make meaningful connections.
In the ever-expanding portfolio of her relationships, Sharlene is a self-proclaimed "relationship anarchist." Her love for friends is boundless. Her superpower lies in her ability to foster connections between her friends, creating a network of intertwined lives where bonds flourish.
Sharlene Durfey Francois is not merely an artist and connector; she is a living embodiment of the beauty that lies at the intersection of creativity and human interaction. With every new interaction and every bond she nurtures, she inspires us all to explore the profound art of embracing the richness of connections and the endless possibilities of creative expression.
Pitch into the kickstarter!
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/intimacycards/intimacy-cards?ref=9937lk
Check out the instagram!
Brianna Hammerman is a psychotherapist based in Boulder, Colorado, specializing in Equine Assisted Psychotherapy. She is also an old friend, a shameless horse girl and Co-host of ‘Unbridled Therapists’ podcast. I am thrilled to welcome her to the show today!
Tatiana Oliveira Simonian has worn many hats: musician, music journalist, big deal marketing executive and holistic career coach and consultant, Tatiana is also a spiritual warrior with long term sobriety and a dear old friend. I’m so happy to talk to her on today’s episode of Sober Sex!
You can find more about Tatiana and her work at https://www.tatianasimonian.com/
Tawny Lara is an NYC based millennial also known as ‘The Sober Sexpert’. Her book, ‘Dry Humping: A Guide to Dating, Relating and Hooking Up Without Booze’ comes out September 19, 2023.
If you like what she has to say, buy her book here!
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/730665/dry-humping-by-tawny-lara/
Rae McDaniel is a non-binary therapist, certified sex therapist, transgender diversity and inclusion educator, speaker and author of ‘Gender Magic’. They are the founder and CEO of Practical Audacity, a gender and sex therapy practice based in Chicago, and an international advocate for gender freedom. We are thrilled to welcome Rae to the show today.
You can find more about Rae and their awesome work at https://www.gendermagic.com/ and https://rae-mcdaniel.com/
Jessi Kneeland is a queer + nonbinary writer, speaker and body neutrality coach. On June 6th, their book ‘Body Neutral, A Revolutionary Guide to Overcoming Body Image Issues’ was published. This is Jessi’s second time on Sober Sex and we are so happy to welcome them back.
Tamsin Embleton is an attachment based psychotherapist and the director of the Music Industry Therapist’s Collective (MITC). She has worked as a music promoter, tour manager and artist manager for ten years prior to shifting her focus to therapy, and she has recently published ‘ Touring and Mental Health: the Music Industry Manual’. It is a delight to welcome Tamsin to chat with us on Sober Sex!
Meenadchi has over 10 years of experience in trauma and crisis stabilization. She is the author of ‘Decolonizing Nonviolent Communication’ and is a family constellation therapist, working to help clients release intergenerational baggage and discover (or rediscover) a sense of purpose, sovereignty and motivation for doing good work in the world. I am delighted to welcome Meenadchi to Sober Sex.
Apologies for the recent delay in new episodes, we have a ton of great stuff coming your way and this episode sets a tone for great interviews to come. Thanks for your patience, please SHARE IT WITH YOUR FRIENDS, rate, review, subscribe, follow, whatever. This is a labor of love and your support is incredibly meaningful.
Michael Marcus is a person whose recovery I have admired for many years. He published a book about his (mis)adventures in addiction, sexuality, deceit and depravity called ‘#1 Son and Other Stories’ in 2017 and his powerful literary voice and miraculous ability to survive and evolve make him an absolutely thrilling guest to welcome to Sober Sex. This episode is a truly wild ride, and contains some vague mentions of childhood sexual abuse and violence. If you don't feel up to listening to those topics today, maybe choose a different episode.
You can find more about Mike and his work at @dead_western_mind on instagram or buy his book at https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B089FR1ZTN/ref=x_gr_bb_kindle?caller=Goodreads&tag=x_gr_bb_kindle-20