Ray and Rex have struck up a friendship with world-famous sage and wildlife biologist Aesop, at the humble dilapidated shack he calls home deep in the forbidding woods of 580 BCE Lydia in ancient Anatolia. Aesop contends that humans are no different than other animals, citing years of research utilizing the linguistic spectrometer that allows him to converse with various non-human forest denizens.

And it’s time now for another edition of Doctor, Tell Me. Our esteemed sage Dr Roy Kingsley, is here in the studio to answer your health concerns and medical questions. It is no exaggeration to point out that Dr Kingsley has access to all the knowledge in the universe. (And even a few other universes.) Once your question is addressed, we will monitor you, the caller, to see how it’s going, utilizing our patented Radio-O-Scope. Did the Doctor give good advice? Did you even follow his advice?

The Oceantown Repertory Company has decided to try an experiment: put each of the actors in roles completely different from what they’ve ever played before. To do this, they’ve written a new play entitled The Green Felt Feathered Hat. In this play, Johnny The Fool Wilson has agreed to wear a radio transmitter under his famous green felt hat with the decorative rooster feather. He’s now back with the mob and everything they say is being monitored by the authorities.

The Story of Dr Kingsley, chief physician at the Kingsley Teaching Hospital, who is doing his part to alleviate the shortage of medical personnel throughout the world. In this episode, he turns the car accident right across the street into an important teaching moment for his students. Will the victim survive his concussion? Will Dr Kingsley’s students bring him back to the living?

Ray and Rex, at the end of their collective rope with Miss Krakauer’s assignment – to scrutinize the relationship between the wanderer Odysseus and the giant one-eyed Cyclops – have decided to bolt. They climbed into the Kingsley brand Mark IV Model Time Travel Burlap Sack – the one with the ergonomic drawstring. It’s the cheap model where you can’t control which year you’ll wind up in. They are far into the future. The library is still there – only now it’s a lending library of tools – for robots.

Dear friends, when government censorship puts the kibosh on the general population expressing their opinions, what they can’t say in words out loud, perhaps they can whistle.

A small obscure planet hidden behind planet Jupiter is home to a race of intelligent chicken-people. The chickenoid astronomers, searching relentlessly through their astronomatic apparatus have found a nearby habitable planet which they feel they can use to take the edge off their burgeoning poultry population. They’re looking for volunteers to emigrate to this planet, dubbed Earth.

After the recent government purge of epidemiologists, weather forecasters, statisticians, and mathematicians, did they all just go home to sit in the corner tugging at a rag and crying? No! They banded together to create Prognostico: an under-the-radar chain of neighborhood fortune tellers. And why not? It was their job before to predict weather patterns and make economic forecasts and stuff.

Cousin Fred gets to go to Ireland and Ted is left behind to mope all summer. His mother makes him go out and get a job, and he winds up with a gig at the Oceantown Tattler. Will Ted make it as a newspaperman?

Intrepid newspaper reporters Ray and Wilson are going the extra mile in their pursuit of an interest story for the venerated Oceantown Tattler. They have figured out how to get to the Otherworld: the supernatural realm of the deities - and as a public service will be sharing how your petitions for divine intervention are handled behind the scenes.

Antoinette Adams, daughter of lately deceased crime kingpin Big Boss Adams, is now the new Big Boss. Listen as her diary details the transformation of the Big Boss Adams Crime Syndicate under her tutelage.

We report on the new sentencing guidelines of the Round the World Department of Corrections: Instead of throwing lowlifes and scofflaws in the slammer, judges may now sentence them to banishment - to an island of their choosing - thus ameliorating prison overcrowding and bad influences.

After a long famine of felonies, Oceantown police detectives Ray and Rex finally have a crime to track down: the bold busting out of crime boss Oskar “Old King” Fårikål from his prison cell. Fårikål has hijacked a plane to Rio de Janeiro and Ray and Rex are in hot pursuit.

Graduate student Reginald Pulsar of the Kingsley X-10 Research Institute has been embedded in a human body and sent to Planet Earth so that his professors can observe the behaviors shaped by the struggle to survive and thrive in the inhospitable surroundings there. They’ve been utilizing the Hidden Hand of Helpfulness to coax him into better and better levels of existence.

Uncles Fred, Red, Ted, and Honorary Uncle Tillie feel that nuclear families would operate better if they were structured like business concerns. Thus, they are sponsoring an industry summit in place of the annual Kingsley family reunion. What could possibly go wrong?

We pay a visit to the National Census Bureau: Instead of giving all their workers a pink slip at the end of the census, upper management has decided to hang on to everyone and try to find other things for them to count. Thus, at the next census of actual humans, they will be seasoned veterans of Countology.

Yes, here at the office of phobia specialist, Dr Winslow Schott, things are running behind schedule, so the waiting room is full. A few folks have gathered around the water cooler and are trading war stories about the irrational fears that have brought them here.

A Radio Correspondence Course in Linguistics, in which Esteemed Professor Roy Kinsley lectures on the phenomenon of Onomatopoeia: Words that sound just like the thing they are describing. We also listen to the special Onomatopoeia Jukebox in the faculty lounge for some edifying examples.

Yes, it’s a sad thing to visit your older relatives and they have no clue who you are. I see this frequently when I’m here playing the piano at the memory care unit. It’s what led me to invent the revolutionary substance prefrontallinium: a proprietary series of crackling and what sounds like surface noise, added to music in order to restore memory function and reverse symptoms of dementia. The resulting Magic Musical Earmuffs have been clinically shown to stave off cognitive decline. Get yours today.

At their wits’ end with the stories in the newspaper – unable to stand the apprehension of not knowing what tomorrow will bring - brothers Ray and Rex have volunteered to trek to the secret hideout of notorious prophetess Nostradama. They’ve brought a couple portable typewriters in order to take down her predictions for the future