"Maybe mayonnaise can save democracy." This week’s thirstiest movie is... Beautician and the Beast. This film has everything: a bigger, moodier version of Massimo, but with his own country; the literal nanny turning into a union organizer; and a dictator’s entire political ideology crumbling under the seductive, life-changing power of a mayonnaise-heavy sandwich. If you love fascist makeovers, hostile breakfast seating arrangements, and chickens with full emotional arcs, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review The Horror Virgin to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on What Lies Beneath? Tell us on social media @HorrorVirgin or @HorrorVirginPod on Twitter. Up Next: Beastly (2011) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“He only knows doggy style, Paige.” This week’s hottest movie is... Beauty and the Beast. This film has everything: A cursed himbo with fangs, A toddler named after his visible head trauma. The full BEAST System™: bombardment via dinner theater, aggressive emotional bonding, a shift to “respectable boyfriend mode,” a library bribe, and a farewell gift that’s basically romantic spyware with a live feed. If you love gothic castles, enchanted codependency, and wondering whether a teacup was born a teacup, this episode’s for you. Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review The Horror Virgin to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on What Lies Beneath? Tell us on social media @HorrorVirgin or @HorrorVirginPod on Twitter. Up Next: Beautician and the Beast (1997) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“It takes three minutes to become an astronaut, according to this movie.” This week’s hottest space mess is... Armageddon. This film has everything: Instant Astronauts, Thirst traps for middle America, A rogue Glock bouncing around in a spaceship. If you love seatbelt montages, flag-based character development, and gun safety violations in orbit, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review The Horror Virgin to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on What Lies Beneath? Tell us on social media @HorrorVirgin or @HorrorVirginPod on Twitter. Up Next: Beauty and the Beast (1991) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“Are we just going to ignore the fact that Antonio Banderas drinks his brother’s head juice?” This week’s hottest movie is The Mask of Zorro. This film has everything: a horny duel, a lusty confessional booth admission, and a vigilante live-action Puss in Boots. If you love pickled domes, teacup waltzing, and historical accuracy that’s legally inadmissible, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on The Mask of Zorro? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Armageddon (1998) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We’re breaking down Jewel of the Nile—a movie so baffling, it made us question who was driving the plot, the boat, and Michael Douglas’s career in 1985.

“There’s no dick that good in the world.” This week’s thirstiest mess of a movie is... Fool’s Gold. This film has everything: a maybe-teen yacht goblin, a grown man earnestly saying “boat swain,” and Kevin Hart playing a rum-soaked rapper-slash-loan-shark-slash-island oligarch. If you love sketchy ages, mispronounced nautical ranks, and shootouts that defy physics and employment law, this episode’s for you. Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Runaway Bride? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: The Jewel of the Nile (1985) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Two villains, both alike in evil. This week’s thirstiest movie is Runaway Bride. This film has everything: performative egg eating, a third-act Homer Eisenhower reveal, and a print news column that’s basically if Andrew Tate knew how to read and immediately started doxxing hot women for USA Today. If you love petty shade, chaotic horse escapes, and two villains finding love, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Runaway Bride? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Fool's Gold (2008) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Where are the guns coming from? This week’s campiest queer romcom spy fantasy is... DEBS. This film has everything: secret agents in ceiling swings, a sapphic supervillain, and tech so confusing Todd thought it was legit teleportation. If you love standardized-test-based spy recruitment and falling in love with the woman who just tried to murder all your friends... this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on The Wedding Banquet? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Runaway Bride (1999) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“Did I fall asleep for a second?” This week’s hottest movie is... The Wedding Banquet. This film has everything: Avant-garde quilt energy. Sexy paperwork. And a surprise pregnancy caused by Bowen's THAAAAAAAAANG.If you love drag dragons, Civil War diary entries, and marriage proposals that would make ICE furious, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on The Wedding Banquet? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: D.E.B.S. (2004) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“He’s on a 1% Rumspringa.” This week’s hottest movie is... My Own Private Idaho. This film has everything: Narcoleptic street naps. A Shakespearean crime daddy and his Red Hot Chili hype goblin. And the most emotionally devastating campfire scene since The Parent Trap. If you love cult leader Paige, Dutch Boy roleplay, and bisexual tragedy on a wheatfield highway, this episode’s for you. Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on My Own Private Idaho? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: The Wedding Reception (2025) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“Jennifer Tilly is playing F Chess.” This week’s slickest lesbian noir is... Bound. This film has everything: a mob nepo baby who looks like he got kicked out of Boyz II Men, a literal money-laundering montage complete with ironing, and a full-on power move where Gina Gershon goes knuckles deep... then shakes the husband’s hand. If you love vibey noir lighting, criminal scissoring, and domination so subtle it gets hand-delivered through a handshake, this episode’s for you. Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Bound? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: My Own Private Idaho (1991) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"She looks like one of the people from Planet of the Apes. And by people, I mean apes." This week’s most unhinged movie is… Color of Night. This film has everything: a possessed Casio keyboard soundtrack, a man narrating his own life out loud like a noir detective who’s never heard of internal monologue, and a surprise Bruce Willis full-frontal that gives the only believable performance in the entire film. If you love chaotic sax solos, unsolicited monologues, and aquatic dong reveals, this episode’s for you! What did you think of our episode on Love Lies Bleeding? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Bound (1996) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“She just threw up a Kristen Stewart.” This week’s thirstiest movie is Love Lies Bleeding. This film has everything: A gym manager elbow-deep in body horror plumbing. Ed Harris’s forehead winning the Picard for best hairline. An underground love story so jacked on roids and vibes it’s basically She-Hulk by way of A24. If you love magical realism, anabolic steroids, and bodybuilder thirst with a side of murder, this episode’s for you! What did you think of our episode on Love Lies Bleeding? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Color of Night (1994) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“Welcome back to posthumous pregnancy court, where we decide if this dead lady was actually pregnant or not.” This week’s thirstiest thriller is... Fatal Attraction. This film has everything: A 100-minute rage mixtape that makes “Side B” a hostage situation, a man with the kind of dick that makes you skip the hospital and reach for the knife drawer, and Glenn Close dressed like she’s about to hack Keanu Reeves’ brain chip in Johnny Mnemonic If you love posthumous pregnancy trials, emotional terrorism set to cassette, and erotic thrillers that dare to ask, “How bad can a man be… and still get away with it?”—this episode’s for you. What did you think of our episode on Unfaithful? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Love Lies Bleeding (2024) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"Diane Lane gave it all up for a dude who would go down on her." This week’s thirstiest trainwreck is… Unfaithful. This film has everything: a murder snow globe, Diane Lane furiously scrubbing her nethers with literal train water, and a full Beauty and the Beast crossover you’ll never see coming. If you love messy affairs, murder husbands, and sex scenes that somehow involve a public restroom soap dispenser, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Unfaithful? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Fatal Attraction (1987) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"How dare she do that to Puss in Boots?" This week’s most confused kink movie is... Babygirl. This film has everything: a possibly unhinged needle drop, a disappearing cult subplot, and a main character trying to explore vulnerability while also spearheading the automation apocalypse. If you love messy power dynamics, baffling sex scenes, and standing in the corner like a good girl, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Spy? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Unfaithful (2002) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"Could you do a dick lineup?" This week’s thirstiest movie is... Spy. This film has everything. An Olympian level hip dick. A CIA agent demanding access to Schrödinger’s Face/Off machine. And the answer to "What’s the only acceptable catcall in Italy?" If you love unhinged spycraft, extremely subtle romance, and Jason Statham literally falling upward, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Spy? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Babygirl (2024) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"You gotta go get it with your tongue, please.” This week’s hottest movie is... The Spy Who Dumped Me. This film has everything: A rogue microchip hidden in a very personal location, Spy skills honed through Duck Hunt, and a missed opportunity Todd just couldn't not mention. If you love chaotic horniness, spy movies written by people who’ve never met a spy, and Mila Kunis falling for the first tall man with an accent, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on The Spy Who Dumped Me? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Spy (2015) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“This is Mr. & Mrs. Smith if they had a baby right after college.” This week’s hottest movie is... Date Night. This film has everything: A chicken nugget mysteriously covered in black ink. A Tripplehorn reference that amazingly isn't about a Ska Band. That moment when someone turns the gun sideways and you know—that’s the kill shot. If you love mid-marriage chaos, Tina Fey’s feral judgment skills, and Steve Carell just trying his damn best, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Lockout? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: The Spy Who Dumped Me (2018) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

“They become shooting star-crossed lovers. It’s Shakespearean, Paige.” This week’s hottest movie is... Lockout. This film has everything, A briefcase full of absolutely nothing, A plot so chaotic they didn’t even credit cocaine with a story credit, And The Rock… but like, in space, with none of the emotional depth and all of the Guy Pearce. If you love milky-eyed villains, fake Shakespeare, and romance that’s more punches than passion, this episode’s for you! Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review Romancing the Pod to help more people discover our community. What did you think of our episode on Lockout? Tell us on social media @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @RomancingPodSho on Twitter. Up Next: Date Night (2010) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.