Emmett Fitz-Hume (Chevy Chase) and Austin Milllbarge (Dan Aykroyd) have been promoted! Congratulations! They will serve as decoys while other CIA agents take down a Soviet nuclear missile launcher. But, not everything in this mission is adding up. Along the way, there will be parachute drops! A metal briefcase with handcuffs is used. There is a secret underground base! Will Sam Raimi let you in? There is mention of codebreaking. There’s a lot of spy stuff happening here! Mr. Ruby (Bruce Davidson) and Mr. Keyes (William Prince) are trying to mastermind it. Karen Boyer (Donna Dixon) “spent the last two and a half years of [her] life preparing for this penetration.” So, there’s that! RTS trains with Colonel Rhombus (Bernie Casey) to become woods ninjas. Jeremy becomes an extra within the Ace Tomato Company. La-Mar smashes the hell out of the SatScram terminal with a rock! Rami hangs with Frank Oz while scrutinizing test takers. B.B. King is here! “Doctor. Doctor. Doctor. Doctor…”

It’s that magical time of year for another SUPER HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR episode! Happy Halloween from everyone at RTS! We have a very spooky trivia quiz as well. Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) should be grateful for the life he is living. While in his bedroom, between mom-approved sex sessions with his girlfriend, Amy (Amanda Bearse), Charley spies on his new neighbor, Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon). Turns out that ol’ Jerry is a vampire. Instead of being cool about it all, Charley calls the cops and starts a bunch of trouble. He also enlists the aid of a television horror host, Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall), and his friend with some horror knowledge, Evil Ed (Stephen Geoffreys). Jerry is not thrilled with any of it. He is thrilled with Amy though. RTS does play it cool and now has wealthy, well-connected vampire friends. Jeremy befriends Billy (Jonathan Stark), and they oversee the estate together. La-Mar bewitches us all as he lays down some slick moves at the 80s nightclub. We all hope you’re having a good time. If not, the master might be upset. Have more treats than tricks – but, really, whatever you’re into.

Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and his best pal Dale (Tyler Labine) are starting their dream vacation. Tucker just spent his savings by purchasing a fixer-upper cabin in the woods. They want to spend their time fishing, relaxing and drinking some beers. There are stories and rumors of some sort of a woodsy massacre from years past, but that won’t stop these two from living their best lives. What will try to stop them is a bunch of Chad-bros led by Chad (Jesse Moss). They mistake the harmless duo as a pair of backwoods psychos! When Tucker and Dale save Allison (Katrina Bowden) from drowning, Chad and the crew take their paranoia to dangerous levels (for themselves). RTS performs a lovely chainsaw ballet amongst the trees. Jeremy learns how heavy half a guy really is. La-Mar successfully escapes a swarm of bees. Emily sensibly decides to stay at a hotel up the road. It includes a pool and a continental breakfast. Be mindful of the woodchipper!

Written by Stephen King, we have three creepy tales guided (sort of) by a cat’s experience and perspective. And, we have our first anthology to discuss on RTS. In our first tale, Dick Morrison (James Woods) is trying his best (maybe) to quit smoking through Quitters, Inc. Dr. Vinny Donatti (Alan King) assures Morrison that he has a 100% success rate, and there will be results or else. In tale two, we meet Johnny Norris (Robert Hays) who has fallen for Cressner’s (Kenneth McMillan) wife. Worst part, he’s a crime boss about to end Norris. Good thing is he bets on everything. If Norris can shimmy around the outer edge of an entire penthouse, riches and love await him. What’s the pigeon have to say about this? Our last story is about a cat! A cat fighting a troll and winning over Amanda’s (Drew Barrymore) affection. RTS feeds the neighborhood cats only the best tuna and goat. Jeremy becomes a plume of smoke at an 80s party. La-Mar successfully circumnavigates the ledge of the first floor. Collin shuts down the troll hole for good. The life of a cat isn’t all playful yarn games and frolicking, at least not this season.

Cole (Judah Lewis) is a somewhat nerdy but good-natured boy who is turning into a young man. When Cole’s parents leave town for the weekend, he’s beyond excited to spend time with his mega-crush babysitter, Bee (Samara Weaving). Bee is the whole package for Cole. She’s funny, she’s pretty, and she can talk nerd culture with ease. When Cole stays up one night to see what the cool kids do, he is surprised to find out that Bee is dealing with the devil and her friends are crazy as hell killers. Cole, now being hunted down, runs, hides and gets assistance with his friend Melanie (Emily Alyn Lind). Blood and explosions ensue! RTS flips cars and burns demon books. Jeremy is insta-bewitched and spins a bottle. La-Mar shows the world the fat dragon! Collin dances himself out of the way of eggs and BMX bullies. Will we ever figure out why Max (Robbie Amell) is shirtless? Will this be your first question? Are you too old for a babysitter?

The struggle of a teen is real. This isn’t the story of a young republican banker to be or of a time traveler avoiding the affections of his mom. This is the howling tale of Scott Howard (Michael J. Fox). He wants to date the girl of his dreams, Pamela (Lorie Griffin), be a high school basketball star and just be popular and liked. Seems like average teen aspirations. He’s also surfing on vans with Stiles (Jerry Levine) and avoiding the affections of a much better local gal, Boof (Susan Ursitti). Wait, Scott is also a werewolf that can summon powers on command! Dad/Harold Howard (James Hampton) thought it could have skipped a generation. The town is super cool with it though. Just got to win some b-ball. RTS searches for Mike in this episode. His body is feeling the change. Jeremy sweats buckets upon buckets. Someone is going to have to clean this up. La-Mar avoids a card game with a guy who has the first name of a city, but he does go out with a lady with a dagger tattoo. Collin learns what really happens in the bleachers at the end of the game. You don’t need a full moon to have a good time here. It’s been inside you this entire time? That seems right. Go FULL WOLF!

The mustachioed mythos of Jack Ramsay (Tom Selleck) is revealed and is in full force (full stalk) within this futuristic dream. Ram-Man does NOT like rogue robots. They really twiddle his stache. He also doesn’t like heights, and sometimes he becomes a real grump about it. Luckily, he’s partnered up with Karen Thompson (Cynthia Rhodes) to temper the crank. And, if Ramsay can’t grab a dinner with Jackie (Kirstie Alley), maybe it will work out with Thompson. Getting dinner seems like an integral plot point to this film. That and Dr. Luther (Gene Simmons) brandishing weapons and staring into your eyes like a madman. Well cast! Whatever! Machines are angry or something! Microchip! RTS fights off drones and tries future sushi. Jeremy dodges an array of heat-seeking smart bullets. La-Mar casually knocks around a horde of spider robots. Collin rides the corn-cutter bot to freedom. This future is bonks! And, in many ways, Michael Crichton, you predicted it well. Now, let’s talk dino DNA.

What do you have planned for your science project? Another show stopping volcano? Regrow some vegetable scraps? Solar powered something? How about submitting an unstable device that creates time warps? Let’s go with that! Michael Harlan (John Stockwell) has been told by ex-hippie turned professor, Bob (Dennis Hopper) that he needs to submit a science project or he will fail. Mike takes his friend/date Ellie (Danielle von Zerneck) to a military junkyard of wonders. Classic first date! They find a device that houses a glowing purple orb. Note: these are not sexual allusions. Once Mike and his friend Vince (Fisher Stevens) hook a car battery up to this alien device, time becomes unhinged. Is this project worth an A? What’s Cleopatra doing here? Get ready for Sherman (Raphael Sbarge) to quickly break away from nerdom. RTS outruns electricity! Jeremy makes sure you don’t forget about the school tax, jellyfish. La-Mar gets the device past the fuzzballs. Collin obliterates a dinosaur. History be damned! “In the ozone, blowzone,” make sure everything is “dyno-supreme.”

We received this super fun listener request. Thank you, Mike! In this tale of teenage heroism, viewers will learn the ways of fresh baby nugs and wheezing the juice and/or gigs. Dave Morgan (Sean Astin) is a grump with dreams of becoming the prom king, dating Robyn (Megan Ward) and hosting an epic end of year pool party. This party will be in the current backyard hole he is digging with his bestie, Stoney (Pauly Shore). During this pool-dig turned excavation, these lads find a human popsicle, Link (Brendan Fraser). After thawing him out and giving him a fly 90s look, it’s high school time! For Dave, this could be the path to popularity. Caveman shenanigans ensue. RTS makes their way through all the nugs and cones. Jeremy becomes infected with grooves and learns to “feed the monkey.” La-Mar gives a sincere and direct SHOOOOOOOSH to all the doubters of cave culture. Listen, bud-dy, give this a view and have a good time. “The cheese is old and moldy.”

The Harvey family from Chicago have inherited a yacht that was once owned by Clark Gable, and they want to give their kids an out-of-city sailing experience that they will remember. Oh, they’re going to remember this! Martin/dad (Martin Short) thinks he can do it all. He cannot. Katherine/mom (Mary Kay Place) is good spirited and skeptical (rightfully so). Leading the family is the fantastical Captain Ron Ricco (Kurt Russell). He might be a bit scruffy, and don’t trust him in Monopoly, but he’ll eventually get the family where they need to be – physically and spiritually. The kids take part in this family adventure. Ben (Benjamin Salisbury) strives to become promoted from swab to mate. Caroline (Meadow Sisto) is engaged but “it’s kind of informal. Like, not a problem.” So, everyone has goals. RTS takes on the pirates of the Caribbean. Jeremy carves out some boat shower time and something to do with a salami. La-Mar learns the way of the revolutionary. Collin dives into the ocean and becomes sea-foam. He is reborn into an air spirit. Hit play on some Bob Marley, grab some rum and come sail away.

This is the legendary story of Toby Kellogg (Jason Bateman), a somewhat questionable musician with an equally questionable future in the music industry and how he handled the mob. Toby wants to hang out with his band and his new lady friend, Megan (Chynna Phillips). Unfortunately, Toby’s parents believe in him and send him to music camp in Interlochen for eight weeks. Halfway through, Toby sneaks out and flies back home. He discovers his parents left, the house is empty and no one probably loves him. Real pity party here. Meanwhile, a mob assassin, Tim (Jack Wagner), is out to get him, and Justice Department Dobbins (John Glover) is trying to save him. What does Tom Skerritt’s mustache think about all of this? RTS packs a radio and a handful of cassette tapes for this adventure. Jeremy helps himself to one of the many sports cars available to all teens in this film. Remember that one time at band camp? If it’s about terrible food and brown water, then, yes, we remember.

Herbert West (Jeffrey Combs) is a strange, young medical student who will break as many pencils as it takes for you to understand that dead cells can come back. West moves in with another medical student, Dan Cain (Bruce Abbott), and he experiments with green glowing serums and Dan’s dead cat. Dan is dating Megan (Barbara Crampton), who thinks West is a major creep. During these scientific shenanigans, the two doctors-to-be turn Megan’s dad, Dean Halsey (Robert Sampson), into a re-animated ghoul. Whoopsie daisy! In the backdrop of all of this, Dr. Carl Hill (David Gale) loses his head and attempts to steal all of West’s work. Also, Dr. Hill is trying to get mad freaky with Megan! RTS looks into the void and sees Cthulhu, and it looks kind of adorable. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin go on a re-animating spree. Everything is coming back! Where’s the security guard for this? “Cat dead, details later.”

Kai James of the Australian band Girl and Girl joins us. As an Australian ambassador, he lets us know that this is ALL true. Maybe even based on a true story. In a somewhat near future, things have gone wrong! Australia, the U.S. and North Korea are all that’s left! That’s bizarre. When you’re not thinking of that, go see a film. Jimmy ‘Crabs’ Rossini (Ned Manning) wants that. Oh, and sex with Carmen (Natalie McCurry) in a car. Done and done! But, some cops steal two of his wheels while the pasties are in play. Turns out this drive-in is really a concentration camp for the youths. Thompson (Peter Whitford) is behind some of this. Well, he has a dated computer control panel and Foster’s. Lots of Foster’s. Those rounded up all seem cool with it. They also become a bunch of weird racists rather quickly. Jimmy just wants out!  RTS escapes the Rocks Riot and now inquire about joggers selling their shoes. La-Mar is appalled by the snack selection but has been enjoying the films at the drive-in. Kai was going to become a carboy, but he is bewitched by the golden nipples of the future. Who wouldn’t be? Good thing we can still get some Fanta in this dystopia. Music by: Girl and Girl. 

This is a tale of love. Love and goo! Some of the crazy townsfolk love putting toxic waste into the ground. This just seems like a recipe for mutants! Unfortunately, two brothers, Josh (Wings Hauser) and Mike (Lee Montgomery), drive through town and get caught up in this mess. Josh does meet Holly (Jody Medford), and when she’s not bartending or teaching, she may or may not be down for some fun times. Meanwhile, when sheriff Will Stewart (Bo Hopkins) isn’t hitting the Wild Turkey, he’s trying to convince his superiors that there’s something amiss. RTS avoids the hand goo stigmata. Jeremy joins Holly for some after school tutoring. La-Mar tosses numerous Molotov cocktails into the faces of mutants. They are not fans of that! Collin sits down and gets to really know the mutants and what’s troubling them. After, he face-bombs them, too! If you’re in for a series of bad decisions, boiler room pipe fights and are ready to leap over a pool table during a barroom brawl, then let’s get mutated!

John Carpenter directs this eerie tale. A publishing company hires John Trent (Sam Neill), an insurance investigator, to track down a missing author, Sutter Cane (Jürgen Prochnow). Cane’s books seem to drive certain readers to go crazy, but, hey, sales are through the roof! The head of the publishing company, Jackson Harglow (Charlton Heston), sends Linda Styles (Julie Carmen) along with John to the town of Hobb’s End which may or may not exist. Their goal is to find Cane and find out what is happening as the world seems to be falling apart/meshing into hell. Rest assured, there will be plenty of suspense and Lovecraftian horror along the way. RTS attempts to avoid reading Cane’s newest novel. They fail and now live in a demon world. Anyone have a black crayon? Jeremy now resides in an ever-changing nightmare painting. La-Mar rides a bicycle on the endless highway stretch of darkness. Are you just fiction in a story? You better check yourself because “he sees you.”

A bunch of townies playing video games with their joysticks. The metaphors do not run deep here. If you’re looking for a local scene where accruing points makes you royalty, where the vibe is provocative and the women love disrobing freely, then you just found your way to the local arcade, friend. Jefferson Bailey (Scott McGinnis) and his grandfather own and operate the town video-tech. When grandfather gets ill (or something, do we really know?), Jeff has to take on the resident busybody, Joseph Rutter (Joe Don Baker), and his idiot nephews. They want to Footloose the arcade youths! Meanwhile, Rutter’s daughter, Patsy (Corinne Bohrer), is in on the teen delinquency. Jeff will have to battle his on-screen girlfriend's father demon and take on King Vidiot (Jon Gries) to save the day! The arcade? The summer? What the hell is really going on here? Is Eugene (Leif Green) hooking up? Is McDorfus (Jim Greenleaf) going to have a heart attack? RTS loves after hour parties and secret sexy video games. La-Mar shatters records in Moon Patrol and dominates a few rounds of Gorf. Collin gets on a minibike and shows the crowd who the Pole Position champion really is. When you’re not taking off your shirt or having backroom circle-bed sex, just remember, “Totally awesome video games!”

Montgomery Brewster (Richard Pryor) is a minor-league baseball player for the Hackensack Bulls who is approaching the end of his game. Luckily, his recently deceased great uncle, Rupert Horn (Hume Cronyn), left him a heap of cash. But, there’s a caveat and a lesson to be learned. Brewster must spend 30 million dollars in 30 days without gaining anything. If he depletes the funds (in accordance to the spending rules), he will gain his true inheritance of 300 million dollars. If he has anything left over, he loses it all. With the help of his friend Spike (John Candy), he is going to learn to spend hard – and hate every moment of it. Angela Drake (Lonette McKee) will keep track of all of the spending, and she will be giving heavy-handed, disapproving comments along the way. Learn to have some fun, Angela! Angela’s fella, Warren (Stephen Collins), is too busy leaving law to become an overpaid interior decorator. RTS always finds time to hang out with Edward Roundfield (Pat Hingle). He’s always one of the nicest people we see around these parts. Jeremy learns to bring the heat with the assistance of Charley (Jerry Orbach). La-Mar enters the collectable stamp game. Collin makes sure that you won’t vote for anyone. This is worth a watch as there is a rich, memorable cast that has, for the most part, passed away. We miss you all!

It’s our three-year anniversary! Thanks for listening! No one knows what to do or how to diagnose Jimmy (Luke Edwards), so the family puts him in a home. Corey (Fred Savage), his brother, decides to break him out and wander aimlessly into California. California! Along the way, they meet Haley (Jenny Lewis), and together they decide to level up Jimmy’s gaming skills and enter him into Video Game Armageddon to prove that Jimmy has mythical video game skills and the ability to win 50k! In the backdrop, dad/Sam (Beau Bridges) and his other son, Nick (Christian Slater), search for the kids while battling Putnam (Will Seltzer), a sleazy child bounty hunter. RTS gets to the sixth palace of Hyrule and past the river devil. The world learns why Corey is “so thick.” Jeremy learns why the Power Glove is “so bad.” La-Mar finds the scroll weapon and almost beats Mecha-Turtle. Collin waxes your tail in Double Dragon! Don’t get lost in Goblin Valley, and enjoy your adventures. Thank you for listening over these years, and use that flute! It opens a warp. Wink! 

Johnny, Johnny. Angry Johnny? Maybe not angry but goal oriented. Johnny (Keanu Reeves) has some crucial data stored all up inside his head, and he’s got to get it delivered or the Yakuza or synaptic seepage is going to kill him. Who hasn’t risked massive seepage in a dystopian future? The kicker is that Johnny is someone only concerned with himself, and now his dome contains the cure to save all of humanity. Spider (Henry Rollins) is helping in the good fight. Jane (Dina Meyer) is beating baddies down when she doesn’t have the shakes. An assassin preacher (Dolph Lundgren) looks like He-Man (again). J-Bone (Ice-T) is here! DAMNNN! RTS gets some sweet tech upgrades to their future bods courtesy of Takahashi (Takeshi Kitano). La-Mar and Collin check out the club with Ralfi (Udo Kier). They were never seen again. The world is not ready for Internet-2021!

While playing a game of Crazy ball, siblings, Mimi (Nita-Josée Hanna) and Luke (Owen Myre), find a gem and resurrect an alien monster, Psycho Goreman (Matthew Ninaber/Steven Vlahos), that wants to destroy everything. In a way, these gruesome murders and destruction are an artform. Fortunately, Mimi is able to use this gem to control this being, and it is continuous party time after! Well, the creature, Psycho Goreman (PG), hates everything about it! A bunch of intergalactic baddies are coming to Earth! A child has been turned into a brain blob. An officer is a soulless ghoul. People are exploding! Blood is everywhere! Greg (Adam Brooks), the father, is breaking down hard, but he’s going to prove he isn’t lazy. Susan (Alexis Kara Hancey), the mother, awkwardly transforms into one of these creatures. Even though the world is in peril, Mimi is having fun. RTS joins PG’s rockin’ band. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin fight a blood box demon and learn that monsters can love. Is this film really about all the hunky boys out there? PG says he doesn’t care about those hunky boys, but does he? If you’re not having fun here, “frig off!”