We chat Magpie Espresso, Bobby's muscle mass, Buckley's flex, Framptonelli Pizza, cup of concrete Wade, share house meat, your game day itineraries and our hard ranking of Collingwood prelims

We celebrate Splinter Malthouse flooring burglar thugs, Collingwood dominating backward Adelaide, plus cussing Pies, Beatlemania Schultz, the De Goey face, Mason's moment, apex Moore, Maynard's tackle, the return of the Nedlongian calendar and all our juicy highlights from a vintage Dirty Pies Qualifying Final

We chat bus convoys, Bobby’s hopes, the Cox wild card, Adelaide’s dirty pies moment, our fabulously camp psych-out strategy, and a Hard Ask featuring your nail-biting Grim Reaper moments

We drink Irish whiskey in the box, Guinness on the hill, send an SOS to Phil Cox, weigh in on All-Australian oversights, finals themes, retirement Kool-Aid and make our case for a quantum vibe shift.

We chat concussion nostalgia, seretonin depletion and a Malthouse love-in, plus Cameron's contract, Nathan's affair, Perryman's grill, Jordan's Yak, Wade's rib sauce, and Damien's self help audiobook at our hardest hour. 

We chat Pie Hard Paparazzi and the ongoing Silvagni saga, Porthole reviews, Snoop Style CEO's, Robo-Wade and virile JDG, plus your best of AFL in the 90s.

We chat half-priced hotdogs, Bologna babies, silver bullets and the blip the Magpies had to have, plus retro guernseys, Kinetic bongs, Yakuza pinkies and our take on the post-cuddle ball strategic landscape.

We chat Gold Coast creepy crawlies and the second Nick we had all along, ancient Pies supporters, IQ's fragrances, Peter's outsourced social media and our anti-social take on the anti-social hotline travesty.

We chat chest-puffing Pies, imperious Moore and the return of Titchell, plus Graham 'death' Wright, Damo's crayfish, Roan's Bolognese, and an indulgent look back at 100 episodes of delicious Collingwood culture.  

Magpie clickbait, Conjurer McRae, De Goey’s Grand Designs, Steele in, Steele out, Neapolitan defence, Monkey Magic rivalry, Grossi menu porn and the long-awaited return of PhD.

Pie Hard attempts to reel in a Collingwood legend, weighs in on the ubiquitous tagger debate, calls time on a Carlton coach, samples a delicious new club sponsor, spotlights the rise and rise of Darcy Cameron and Frampchise, salivates over incoming goal pig Charlie West, all while downing a couple of cold hard fridge cigarettes

We scrape the bye week barrel to unearth Collingwood connections to the design world, celebrate the Maynard contract, analyse which veterans will play on, reveal the identity of the next Collingwood Big Fish, and for some reason we even talk about Warren Tredrea.

This week Pie Hard mainlines the Collingwood speedball, unloads on embarrassing wizard hats, sneaks into the Daicos' dentist box, carb loads with Isaac Quaynor and generally peaks too early to a soundtrack of Aaron James folk songs

We settle on a theme for Collingwood's terrifying burst dominance, discuss mid-season recruits, a return to the Magpie nest for Dermie, celebrate Ned Long's game of shrugs, Oleg's Bunnings sausage, and the plantar fascia fix that was there all along

Pie Hard goes horizontal to dream Bobby patting babies, Nick's protective droogs, Maynard dissing North, Daicos family dentistry, 90's in-game dining, and our evergreen diatribe against the Dome

We head to Rome to anoint the first-ever Collingwood Pope, survive a bout of rigor mortis out west, unveil fresh sponsor kickbacks for Big Ned, decode the club’s latest Wadeless injury report, and ask the Harders how to indoctrinate the next generation of Magpie tragics

We exhume the Geelong game, dissect Derek Hine's Tassie makeover, Jaidyn Stephenson's Uber Eats addiction and De Goey's malaise, whilst looking forward to provoking the purple haze with profound disrespect at the selection table

We chat Anzac Day angles, the legend of the Collingwood Cougars, magpie autobiographies, golfing activations, globetrotter handballs, next-gen prospects, and a mouth-watering Pie Hard free agency sales pitch

We chat music licensing with our lawyers, enjoy kick to kick on the Gabba, reflect on our love affair with Jamie Elliott, explain the resurgence of Darcy Moore, uncover a scamming Eddie McGuire, share our tip for the Anzac medallist and relive the infamously 'safe' Waislitz Balls.

Snub-nosed revolvers and the end of Carlton, Gladiator Peter, Josh's dream home, zero-carb Carp, breaking bad caravans, choose your own adventures and the transcendent joy of littering at the G.