We discuss framing the conversation - polarization seeps into romance and dating, aesthetic signifiers, identity, Kegan stages, problem of political mega-identities, internet avatars, fan culture, and tinder, communication mediums, withdrawing from politics and the exhausted majority, SHAME  the “other,” dating, romance and erotic fetishization, transformation requires energy and making space for taboos, repulsion, attraction,  love, hippies, god, the issue with liberalism art, symbolism, aesthetics and channeling energy.