In this honest conversation, Carl and Laura Lentz rip open the facade of "perfect marriages" to expose the unspoken epidemic: couples who love each other but can't stand being in the same room. Drawing from their own marriage reconstruction after losing everything publicly, they reveal why "liking" your spouse is actually harder—and more important—than loving them. Carl shares the moment five years ago when Laura looked him in the eye and said "I hate you right now," while Laura opens up about how they went from tit-for-tat scorekeeping to becoming best friends who can't wait to get home to each other. They expose the comfortable lie that love alone keeps marriages together, when the brutal truth is: without "like," you're just roommates with rings. From the Ben Franklin marriage hack that rewires your brain to like your spouse again, to why Carl leaves hats scattered across the house like breadcrumbs and Laura just stopped caring, this episode demolishes the Instagram marriage fantasy. They reveal why successful couples make "reasonable concessions" (translation: accepting your spouse's annoying traits because you actually like them), how doing favors for someone literally changes your brain chemistry to like them more, and why Carl starts every single day texting Laura before checking anything else. The frame that changed everything: Love is a commitment you make once. Like is a choice you make daily. And if you're sitting there thinking "I love my spouse but..." while your partner's jokes don't make you laugh anymore and their presence feels like work, this conversation reveals the exact path back to actually enjoying the person you're building a life with. Warning: This episode will challenge couples who've accepted mediocrity as "just how marriage is" and may trigger those who use love as an excuse to avoid the harder work of actually liking their spouse. --- Follow Carl at: https://www.instagram.com/carllentz/ Follow Laura at: https://www.instagram.com/lauralentz/ --- CHAPTERS: 00:00 - "I Love You But I Don't Like You Right Now" 00:27 - Love Is Easy, Like Takes Work 01:14 - You Can't Fall Out of Love (You Just Stopped Thinking) 02:26 - The Week Everything Fell Apart 03:29 - Why Liking Each Other Saved Our Marriage 04:04 - From Fault-Finding to Beauty-Finding Glasses 10:00 - We're A Team: The Gift of Different Strengths 13:01 - Making Reasonable Concessions (Carl's Hat Trail) 16:49 - The Ben Franklin Marriage Hack 19:56 - Our Actions Shape Our Feelings 21:00 - Do Nice Things to Like Them (Not the Other Way Around) 23:02 - Laura's Text Reminders to Encourage Carl 25:03 - Carl's Daily Morning Text Ritual 26:20 - What Have I Done For Her Lately? 27:01 - Compassionate Curiosity Builds Connection 28:02 - Rupture, Repair, Build Cycle 30:38 - The Like Is What Makes Marriage Fun 31:43 - What Might I Discover About You Today? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.