In this episode of Les Chat, we’re diving deep into the messy, dramatic, sometimes sweet chaos that is The Ultimatum: Queer Love Season 2. From long-term couples to one-and-a-half-year situationships, we break down all the pairings — and yes, we have opinions. 👀
Plus: Can someone explain why Reba’s JoAnna Garcia Swisher is still hosting this? We have a better list of queer icons who should take the mic next — from Niecy Nash to the L Word’s OGs. 🧼🎤
🎬 Also this episode:
Reality show pitches you didn’t know you needed: "Third Time’s the Charm" (polyamory throuples) & "Queer in the Dark" (voice-only dating meets chaotic reveals).
👩⚖️ Kim Davis is back and trying (again) to overturn gay marriage… we explain what it means in simple terms.
✈️ TROVA TRIP survey update + how to get a discount for our next queer adventure.
💌 Family Meeting: One listener asks if it's OK to stay friends with an ex they used to hook up with — even if it makes their current partner uncomfortable. We weigh in.
📅 Catch-Up: See y’all at Bad Bunny on Aug 16th! 🐰💃
🎧 Rate, review, and follow Les Chat on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!
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🎮 Twitch: JoJo | Dayra
🩲 Gender-Neutral Boxers: Lucky Skivvies – use code LES10 for 10% off
✈️ TROVA Trip Survey — help us plan our next trip!
We’re back with Part 2 of our unforgettable Southeast Asia adventure and this time, we’re taking you to PHUKET, THAILAND 🇹🇭🌴
After an incredible week in Bali, we hopped over to Thailand with our crew of 12 queer baddies for the second leg of our epic girls trip. From ping pong shows, to island hopping in crystal-clear waters 🚤, pool parties that went way too late 🍹, to catching the most chaotic drag show of our lives 💃🏽 this week was pure magic.
Whether you were with us IRL or living through the pics and stories, come relive the laughter, chaos, and love that made Phuket one for the books.
🎙️ Missed Part 1 (Bali)? Go listen now!
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We’re back and kicking off a two-part series from our epic two-week adventure in Southeast Asia! In this episode, we’re diving into the first leg of the journey: Bali, Indonesia 🇮🇩
We spent a week in Ubud and Sanur in Bali with 19 of our amazing listeners, exploring the Sacred Monkey Forest 🐒, getting blessed at ancient temples 🛕, screaming (just a little) on the Bali Swing 🌄, and soaking up the culture, chaos, and beauty of island life. From spiritual moments to spontaneous laughs and matching tattoos, we’re unpacking what made this part of the trip unforgettable (we probably missed a few stories).
Whether you joined us or followed along from afar, this one’s for you.
🎙️ Part 2 (Thailand!) drops next week.
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NYC PRIDE is coming in hot! 🌈 Pull up to PRIDEANDFRIENDS.NYC for the Brooklyn Day Party on Saturday, June 28th, 2–9PM.
This Week’s Catch-Up:
🎬 We’re watching Love Island USA Season 7 — and yes, we have thoughts.
📽️ The Travis Scott: Astroworld documentary — heavy stuff.
💍 The Ultimatum: Queer Love Season 2 is finally here — two years later, and we’re ready for the drama.
Also… we're heading to Bali and Thailand soon! If you’ve been, comment your best tips, hidden gems, or must-avoid mistakes 🙏🏽
Family Meeting Time 🧠💔
One listener is in a long-distance relationship that began as polyamorous but turned exclusive, or so they thought. After a betrayal involving an ex from the original poly dynamic, they're wondering:
“Am I wrong for asking my partner to cut off contact with her ex if we’re going to make this work?”
We break it all down:
What polyamory actually means (and how it differs from open relationships)
Why emotional and physical boundaries still matter after shifting to monogamy
What to do when trust is broken and accountability is missing
The hard truth: Love isn't enough without respect, clarity, and shared values
Plus, we highlight a past podcast gem: “The Contract to My Polyamory” ft. Jerrie Johnson — a powerful conversation on redefining relationship structures and setting intentional agreements. (Go queue it up after this!)
And if you're curious about how real-life poly families make it work, we’re also talking about the show Polyfamily on HBO Max, messy, beautiful, and so worth discussing.
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NEW
JOJO’S TWITCH ACCOUNT:
DAYRA’S TWITCH ACCOUNT:
This week, we’re unpacking A LOT.
First up: the ICE raids in LA. We’re spreading the word, sharing where to donate, and why staying informed matters more than ever. (resources below)
Then, Fletcher? JoJo Siwa? Billie Eilish? All dating men during Pride Month?! Feels homophobic, honestly.
We also give you the rundown on our Philly & DC Pride adventures, queer joy, wild moments, and a few hangovers.
And in our Family Meeting, we hear from a listener who’s four years into a relationship and still wildly thirsty for her fine-ass masc girlfriend, but is starting to wonder if the passion is mutual. We’ve got thoughts (and experience 👀).
Make a difference during Los Angeles ICE raids.
Donate food, hygiene supplies and household goods to Raíces Con Voz to provide to undocumented families. - LINK
Operation Healthy Hearts has a slideshow of suggestions for how to provide mutual aid support to undocumented immigrants. - LINK
If you know someone who is arrested at a protest
Share the phone number for Jail Support LA: 424-610-3020. The grassroots organization aims to provide support for people who have been arrested — especially protesters — at every step of the legal process. This includes monitoring detentions, bail and paperwork.Jail Support LA is also looking for volunteers to monitor arrests made during LA’s protests against ICE. People can also donate to the organization.
You can also donate to Jail Support LA’s bail fund
JOJO’S TWITCH ACCOUNT:
DAYRA’S TWITCH ACCOUNT:
https://www.twitch.tv/deardayra
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We’re catching up on all things Pride, from Philly to DC! Join us June 6–7 as we host Havana Nights with TASTE Takeover, celebrate queer Latina joy, and ride the DC Pride float to see Cynthia Erivo headlining!
Then we dig into the hot topic: What does it mean to “make being gay your personality”? We unpack why it’s celebrated, why it’s judged, and why authenticity is what really matters.
And in this week’s Family Meeting: What if you’re ready to travel the world but your partner isn’t moving with you (literally or financially)? Is that a deal breaker?
🎧 Note: We’re now an audio-only podcast going forward!
Havana Nights Ticket: https://www.tastetakeover.com/event-details-registration/havana-nights
Preciosa Night Tickets:
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We dive into our weekend celebration for Lilly's birthday (who's been on the podcast twice!) We then quickly chat about the encounter at Boston’s Liberty Hotel where a cisgender woman was asked to prove her gender in a bathroom, shedding light on the ongoing challenges of gender identity and public perception.
We also dive into the evolving concept of lavender marriages which was once used to hide LGBTQ+ identities and now transforming into modern mixed-orientation relationships. From Hollywood cover-ups to genuine soul connections like Samantha and Jacob’s, we explore why more people are embracing unconventional partnerships, the shifting meaning of gender in relationships, and how love is being redefined beyond labels.
& YES, WE ARE STILL GOING TO BALI & THAILAND!! Check the link below for more info.
Family Meeting: "I’ve been with my girl for 3 years. It’s been an awesome 3 years. The issue is that she wants to live outside the US for a few years and I don’t see that for me."
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We're catching you up on everything going on the past few weeks, life, drama, healing, and a little oversharing (as usual). We then dive into some truly unhinged lesbian stories that will leave you gasping, laughing, and possibly texting your ex (don’t do it). Let’s get unhinged.
Family Meeting
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In this episode, we reference Dr. Lynda, the Lesbian Couples Coach, and explore how love languages can be uniquely expressed in lesbian relationships. From quality time in nature and playful moments to affirming words and cozy cuddles, we dive into what real connection looks like and how to love each other more intentionally.
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In this episode, we explore how to go beyond the usual "How's work?" and ask deeper questions like, “What are you learning about yourself right now?” to build more meaningful connections.
We also dive into key questions for new relationships, inspired by therapist Jeff Gunther. What counts as cheating? How do we handle privacy, exes, and boundaries? Tune in for insights on fostering communication, trust, and understanding in any relationship.
List of Questions:
QUESTIONS TO ASK SOMEONE AT THE START OF A RELATIONSHIP
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In today’s episode, we dive into the latest lesbian dating drama (TikTok Reference LINK with Beeca Moore & Shannon B.) and what it's really like navigating relationships in the queer community. We also talk about our Les Chat NYC meetup!
Talking Points:
Boundaries with Same-Sex vs. Opposite Sex: Why we tolerate different things from women than from men.
Long-Distance Love: Why long-distance is so common in the LGBTQ+ community and how it really works.
Besties with Exes: Why it’s a lesbian tradition to stay friends with exes.
Nail Lengths & Lesbian Hands: A fun chat on the unspoken rules of nail length in lesbian culture.
Lesbian Time: How relationships can feel like they’re moving at lightning speed.
The L Word: Why this iconic show is a lesbian must-watch.
U-Haul Syndrome: Moving in too fast? Let’s talk about the infamous U-Haul phenomenon.
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In this AUDIO only episode of Les Chat, we’re catching up on everything from the progress of our 75 Soft challenge (46 days to go!) to some exciting updates on our upcoming Thailand and Bali trip (don’t forget, it's the last month to sign up for the payment plan). Plus, we’re thinking about NEW merch drop, with a focus on queer pride gear just in time for Pride Month!
We dive into the Doechii controversy (the Grammy-winning bisexual rap artist) From her viral dating red flag comment to the controversy surrounding an old video with her ex.
Also, we’re discussing the ongoing issue of “preferences” in dating. Are straight people crashing out over bisexuality, or is there something deeper happening? And what about red flags in relationships, jealousy, disrespect, and love bombing?
Family Meeting: we talk about Decision Fatigue. After 5.5 years at her current job, one listener is feeling the stress of decision-making overload. Can you really stop the anxiety from constant choices? We share tips and strategies from Mel Robbins' podcast episode, "Get back on track: 5 evening habits to wake up focused, recharged, and in control".
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In this episode, we talk about the WNBA drama between DiJonai Carrington and NaLyssa Smith, explore what it means to be "heteroflexible," and discuss the complexities of being queer. We dive into why labels matter and how being queer is more than just a choice.
FAMILY MEETING
“I’ve been in a 1.5-year relationship, and recently, my partner has been hanging out with her guy friends more often. When I mention it, she says I’m being controlling. She works part-time and has a lot of free time, while I work full-time and take care of the house and pets in my free time. Am I wrong for wanting her to help with the home and pets before hanging out?”
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Is Love is Blind secretly a lesbian reality show for straight people? We break it down and give you our raw, unfiltered thoughts
Welcome to Raw Conversations with Les Chat Podcast (the audio version only), your bi-weekly Wednesday deep dive into all things personal growth, relationships, and any random thoughts we have!
In this episode, we’re sharing an update on our 75 Soft Challenge, we have 59 days to go, and we’re reflecting on the 16 days we’ve already conquered!
Then, we dive into Love is Blind Season 8 and unravel all the drama. Is everyone secretly a little gay? We’re unpacking the idea that marriage and LGBTQ+ relationships might not always mix with traditional views? Was Sara’s “push” on LGBTQ+ issues portrayed unfairly, or was Netflix just trying to make her look annoying?
We wrap up with a Q&A session answering some of your questions. "As a masc and fem presenting couple, do we make new friends with the opposite type? Jojo with fems, and Dayra with masc, what does that dynamic look like in real life?"
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In this episode, we dive into some common myths about lesbian identities and relationships. We tackle misconceptions like the idea that being attracted to women means rejecting men, that lesbian relationships are always full of drama, or that all lesbians want kids.
FAMILY MEETING
“I need advice. I broke up with my ex of 3 years after she chose her 'friend' over our relationship.”
Source: https://www.teenvogue.com/story/lesbian-myths-debunked
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Is it possible to be with the right person at the wrong time when fear of judgment and not being out holds you back from fully embracing the relationship?
Family Meeting:
"I’ve been dating a girl for the past year and everything has been wonderful but I’m not out yet. I come from a very religious family and I’m also a people pleaser and unfortunately care what people think. She is the woman of my dreams but I don’t know if we can have a relationship if I’m not out the closet yet."
https://linktr.ee/leschat
We’re back after an 8 week break! Ahhhhhhh!! There is SO much to catch up on but we can’t fit it all in one episode. Dayra shares insights from her recent NYC LGBTQ+ speech, and we give updates on work and new home life. Finally, we share 23 ideas for celebrating Valentine's Day as a single, from binge-watching your favorite series to planning an out-of-town getaway, enjoying a parent-child date, or even hosting a singles dinner with friends.
FAMILY MEETING
“My wife/partner of 10+ wants an open marriage and says we want different things because we’re in different places in our life.”
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In this episode, we’re catching up on everything—JoJo just graduated from her academy (finally a secret revealed!), Dayra shares her experience pledging in college, and we chat about how crazy the holidays can be. We also celebrate our 4-year anniversary by skipping gifts and focusing on experiences. Plus, we answer your questions about the habits we've noticed since living together. Tune in for all the updates and good vibes!
Family Meeting: "Was in a LTR with a man for 8 years, started dating girls last year, part of me wants to explore but I also don’t want to fumble the girl I met because she is amazing"
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In this episode, we reflect on the pressures of marriage, kids, and career milestones. We talk about what we've accomplished so far, and how those societal expectations shape our lives.
We also dive into the movie My Old Ass, where an 18-year-old meets her 39-year-old self during a mushroom trip, offering life advice about love, family, and choices. Dayra shares why this scenario would be her worst nightmare, and we wrap up by discussing the things we wish we could tell our younger selves.
Tune in for a mix of humor, honesty, and reflections on the wisdom that comes with age.
Ashlynn Harris Wide Open Episode - LINK
Buy an experience, instead of a physical gift for 2025! Mark your calendar for Travel Tuesday 2024, this coming Tuesday, to receive a $50 discount on our trip! Enter code TRAVELTUESDAY50 at checkout on Tuesday 12/3 and Wednesday 12/4 only, so be sure to reserve your spot!
Family Meeting:
1. "I have a serious mental illness that I’ve been dealing with for over 10 years. I’ve always taken my meds and I’ve always been fine. If I don’t have any issues managing my diagnosis there really is no reason to disclose this. Am I in the wrong if I’m in a relationship with someone for a few months or 1 year & disclose this?"
2. "I went on a date and I immediately knew I didn’t want to see her again which is why I decided to “practice” telling someone about my mental illness. "
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In this episode, we talk about the mental health challenges LGBTQ+ Latinas face, including cultural stigma and the pressure of balancing multiple identities. We also discuss the difficulties of finding mental health care that understands both cultural and LGBTQ+ needs, and how we can break the stigma around mental health in these communities. Tune in for an honest conversation about healing, support, and the importance of visibility in both Latinx and LGBTQ+ spaces.
Family Meeting Question
1. "I met this girl recently and when we met I instantly felt a vibe. The day we met I added her on IG and saw she has a gf. We have met up a few times because I give her private boxing lessons. I have a crush, what is your opinion of why she never mentions her gf?"
2. "I was a part of a Christian group at 21 and experienced religious trauma from conversion therapy. I left that group and came out officially at 28. I went through therapy and now at 31 I’m in a place to start dating. I met a girl and she’s great.. Should I get wifed up or keep my options open?"
AutoStraddle Post LINK
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