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How To Destroy Everything
HTDE | QCODE
38 episodes
2 days ago
This is the true story of Richard Jacobs – a narcissist who destroyed a childhood, a marriage, a family, and a community. He sued every sentient being on the face of the earth, got banned from restaurants, and inspired a support group composed solely of people he traumatized. He stole notary stamps, hacked emails, forged signatures… and won a U.S. Supreme Court case. He was also my dad. Join us each week as hosts Danny Jacobs and Darren Grodsky will shift between past and present to explore the lasting impact of Richard Jacobs. Subscribe to How to Destroy Everything on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts.
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Documentary
Society & Culture
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All content for How To Destroy Everything is the property of HTDE | QCODE and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
This is the true story of Richard Jacobs – a narcissist who destroyed a childhood, a marriage, a family, and a community. He sued every sentient being on the face of the earth, got banned from restaurants, and inspired a support group composed solely of people he traumatized. He stole notary stamps, hacked emails, forged signatures… and won a U.S. Supreme Court case. He was also my dad. Join us each week as hosts Danny Jacobs and Darren Grodsky will shift between past and present to explore the lasting impact of Richard Jacobs. Subscribe to How to Destroy Everything on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts.
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Documentary
Society & Culture
Episodes (20/38)
How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 6: Mom Hustle and The Girl Upstairs
In this chapter of our story, we find Maureen is officially back on her feet, though struggling to make ends meet for her and the kids. After a variety of jobs, she ends up working in a factory and takes in some of her fellow employees as roommates to pay the rent. Stephen is displaced when a particularly provocative boarder rents his room, upending a family already desperately in need of stability. We then hear Danny and Darren reflect on how this episode is a true snapshot of 60’s and 70’s America, how Stephen lacked the rock of stability of Danny’s grandparents and how Stephen’s mom’s secrets and schemes eerily mirror those of one Richard Jacobs. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 days ago
1 hour 4 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 5: Homeless and The Edges of Town
We now find Lisa, Sheila and Stephen taking refuge with their Uncle John in Washington State, where young Stephen learns some hard life lessons on a construction site. They return to Mission Viejo, just in time to lose whatever housing Maureen had established, as she enters psychiatric treatment. Sheila and Stephen are taken in by a compassionate family, until Maureen is ready to start over, moving them all to the far edge of town. We then hear Darren, as a parent, express concern over “little Stephen” while Danny and Stephen bond over their shared clowning skills as a survival mechanism. Then, our hosts explore the scars and strengths of homelessness, agree on “the Devil you know,” and finally ask Sandy’s take on Toughen Up! If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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1 week ago
1 hour 6 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 4: The Road to 333
After losing their suburban home, Maureen moves with Stephen and Sheila into a Travelodge, only to dispatch her children on an epic road trip with their fugitive sister Lisa. Heading north, the three siblings experience a shared moment of grace on a rainy night, outside of a Canadian liquor store. Then Danny and Darren push in on the fear and loneliness of the children being left to fend for themselves. Danny speaks of The Triumph of Small Things, while Darren reminds us we are all members, to some degree, of “The Destruction Community.” If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 weeks ago
51 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 3: Wes, Skatebarn, The Big Split and Frank
Wherein young Stephen seeks refuge from his own family at a house “down the street.” His father then reveals a side of himself that no one could have imagined, just before the marriage finally falls apart. Gene moves away while Maureen makes a new “friend.” Then, hear why the boys call this “The Darren Episode” and define the true meaning of an oasis. Then, Danny and Darren explore the hidden meaning behind Stephen’s sound effects and what it meant to have his father reveal that he could “fly.” Head to https://bubblycleaning.com/HTDE to get your first 3 hours of cleaning for only $19. Thanks so much to Bubbly Cleaning for sponsoring this episode! If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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3 weeks ago
1 hour 12 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 2: Buses, Nuns, Christmas, Knives and a No-Name Sister
Episode Two finds Maureen taking on The Reverend Mother of her children’s Catholic School. The family then experiences the darkest Christmas of their lives, propelling them south, to face an uncertain future in an empty house in the suburbs. A violent period unfolds for The Kearins, which includes a hammer, a hospital and a runaway girl. Then Danny and Darren explain why they called this “The Catholic Episode,” explore the nature of forgiveness and our attempts to stop a cycle of family dysfunction. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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1 month ago
1 hour 6 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up - Episode 1: Mom, Dad and the Fighting
In our first episode, we meet Stephen’s tough girl Jersey mother and his post war(s) farm boy father, as they attempt to raise him, his two sisters, and themselves in a tiny apartment in Van Nuys, California. Then, Danny and Darren start exploring what’s behind his parents' pain, what happens to feelings frozen in time, and where is the Grace in all of this madness? If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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1 month ago
1 hour 7 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy a Live Show
Wherein Danny and Darren confront their audience live for the very first time. Danny discusses his complicated feelings about St. Louis, and surprise guests abound. Recorded at famed St. Louis merch shop, Stl-Style, Danny and Darren search for some meaning and share final thoughts from the journey they've just completed. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron a  www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Head to https://www.BubblyCleaning.com/HTDE to get your first 3 hours of cleaning for only $19. Thanks so much to Bubbly Cleaning for sponsoring this episode! Get 15% offOneSkin with the code DESTROY at https://www.oneskin.co/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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1 month ago
1 hour 14 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Trailer: How To Destroy Everything Presents: Toughen Up
In the spirit of familial destruction, How To Destroy Everything is proud to present, Toughen Up, written and performed by Stephen Kearin. Toughen Up is the story of an American family turned upside down, spilling out every last skeleton in its closet. Join us for a darkly comic traumatic memoir...a Traumoir, if you will.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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1 month ago
2 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 16: How to Create Something New
Wherein Danny returns, at last, to the scene of the crime(s). Danny (alongside Darren and Sandy) go back to his childhood home, The Royal Manor, and Danny confronts his past head-on. In this, the season one finale of How to Destroy Everything, old feelings will burst to the surface, the ghosts of the past will be reckoned with, and the future will become all the more clear.  Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 months ago
1 hour 13 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy the Calm Before the Storm
Wherein Danny and Darren check in one last time with Sandy and talk about the entirety of her podcast journey. In doing so, they discover the incredible strides that Sandy has made in her own personal evolution. Additonally, Danny and Darren bring on Danny's wife, Katie, to discuss her perspective on how the podcast has changed her husband. And finally, our intrepid hosts make a big announcement about what's next for the show.  Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/DESTROY get on your way to being your best self Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 months ago
1 hour 3 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 15: How to Destroy Richard Jacobs
Wherein Danny and Darren finally track down their white whale: a member of the support group founded to bring together people who had been sued and harrassed by Richard Jacobs. But as Danny and Darren get into the details of said group, so much more is revealed than they ever imagined possible -- about the group, yes, but also about Danny and where he goes from here... Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 months ago
56 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy Death
Wherein Danny and Darren watch the "death video" Richard made for Danny back in the 1980s. Also, the boys discuss Richard's view of death and his conception of the "afterlife" with Danny's brother. It's the death episode! Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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2 months ago
51 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 14: How to Destroy a Brotherhood Part 2
Wherein Danny and Darren sit down once more with Danny's brother and delve deeper into understanding each other's perspectives. Danny's brother brings a unique point of view - one of understanding for Richard and even empathy for him, compelling Danny to reevaluate some of the conclusions he's drawn about his father. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at www.betterhelp.com/destroy and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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3 months ago
1 hour 13 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 13: How to Destroy a Brotherhood
Wherein Danny and Darren sit down with Danny's brother and discuss how they survived their childhood as the sons of Richard Jacobs, how their perspectives differ, and whether or not Richard can be fairly compared to a shark. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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3 months ago
1 hour

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy a Dating Profile
Wherein Danny and Darren dive deeper into Beth's relationship with Richard, which includes a shocking revelation that Danny's dad had been operating dating profiles on his sons' behalf. Additionally, Sandy discusses her dating life beyond Richard, and Darren checks in with Danny about his anger. For tickets to Danny's improv show at the Groundlings, head to www.groundlings.com/shows/theunderstudies. And if you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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3 months ago
53 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 12: How to Destroy a Daughter-in-Law
Wherein Danny and Darren bring the podcast full circle by exploring the moment that started it all from a different persepective: Danny's wife. As she illuminates her side of the disaster that led to the termination of Danny's relationship with his dad, our intrepid hosts then speak to the other wife, that of Danny's brother. How does a narcissist affect his kids when they grow up, get married, and have families of their own? What better way is there to find out than by talking to the wives. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. For tickets to Danny's improv show at the Groundlings, head to www.groundlings.com/shows/theunderstudies. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at: www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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3 months ago
1 hour 16 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy an Irish Rabbi
Wherein Danny and Darren interview Stephen Kearin, a mentor to Danny over the last several decades (and Danny's self-described "Irish Rabbi"). Stephen shares his own incredible family story and the boys try to glean some lessons that Danny can apply to his own relationship with Richard.  For tickets to Danny's improv show at the Groundlings on Thursday, March 6th at 10 PM, head here: https://groundlings.com/shows/theunderstudies HTDE Live Show: https://www.stl-style.com/event-details/how-to-destroy-a-live-show-q-a Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts, and please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!  If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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4 months ago
1 hour 2 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 11: How to Destroy Australia
Wherein Danny and Darren explore the newfound freedom Danny felt as a young adult out from under his father's thumb for the first time in his life. But then, Danny gets pulled back into his father's chaos when he agrees to go on a (mostly) paid vacation to Australia. Terrible doesn't do the trip justice. It was so traumatizing that it sends Danny into a mental health spiral as he finds himself abandoned in a foreign country. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts and please don't forget to share, rate and review! If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. This episode is sponsored by brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/destroy and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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4 months ago
1 hour 3 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Interregnum: How to Destroy an Almost Mensch
Wherein Danny and Darren tread into the ridiculous and terrifying world of Richard's dating life, which weirdly took Danny and his brother across the country. Then, the guys bring on Sandy to talk about the "fog of war" - or how she survived the onslaught of litigation brought by Richard after their divorce. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything and please don't forget to share, rate, and review! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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4 months ago
50 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
Episode 10: How to Destroy a Childhood
Wherein Danny and Darren explore the second half of Danny's childhood, which included awkward trips to the ice cream shop and a burgeoning desire to perform as a way of covering up his shame. Additionally, they'll investigate Sandy's side of post-divorce life as they finally solve the mystery of how she was able to afford a decade's worth of lawsuits without going bankrupt. Listen to HTDE on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you would like to support this podcast, please consider becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/HowToDestroyEverything. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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4 months ago
1 hour 9 minutes

How To Destroy Everything
This is the true story of Richard Jacobs – a narcissist who destroyed a childhood, a marriage, a family, and a community. He sued every sentient being on the face of the earth, got banned from restaurants, and inspired a support group composed solely of people he traumatized. He stole notary stamps, hacked emails, forged signatures… and won a U.S. Supreme Court case. He was also my dad. Join us each week as hosts Danny Jacobs and Darren Grodsky will shift between past and present to explore the lasting impact of Richard Jacobs. Subscribe to How to Destroy Everything on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts.