Psychologically, belonging is one of our deepest human needs. But what actually makes us feel like we belong? And what do we give up in order to fit in?

Here, we'll explore the psychology and philosophy of belonging: why our nervous systems are wired for connection, what happens when belonging comes at the cost of self-erasure, and how thinkers like Aristotle, Hannah Arendt, and Kierkegaard help us understand the paradoxes of community. We’ll also talk about the five pillars of belonging and practical ways to cultivate it in your own life.

00:00 Intro

00:54 The illusion of hyperindependence

02:09 My foolish stories of hyperindependence

03:05 Why belonging is important

04:24 What do we sacrifice to belong?

07:20 Environment and belonging

07:57 The psychology of belonging

08:53 Loneliness is a stress state

09:50 The five pillars of belonging

11:38 Aristotle and Zoon Politikon

12:06 Hannah Arendt and Belonging Through Plurality

13:32 Kierkegaard and the paradox of belonging

16:03 How do we actually cultivate belonging in our lives?

18:18 Closing

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