Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This bonus episode shares a poem I wrote on self-worth, confronting reality, and the work of restoring the mind from broken parts. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a par...

Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma I think you are worth the effort of healing. Worthlessness speaks in absolutes, but that doesn’t make it true. In this episode, I explore what happens when you stop taking the voice at face value and begin challenging the thoughts that try to define you. This episode isn’t about strategies to overcome negative thoughts. It’s about acknowledging...

Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Finding the right therapist or counsellor can feel overwhelming, especially after experiencing abuse or trauma (or maybe while you're still experiencing it). In this episode, I share practical tips for choosing a professional who truly understands coercive control and can support your healing journey. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to ...

Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma When you leave an abusive relationship, especially one marked by coercive control, it’s not uncommon for the abuser to launch a smear campaign. This is a deliberate attempt to discredit you, isolate you, and control the narrative after you’ve left. In this episode, I break down what a smear campaign is, the red flags to watch for, and how you can protect your p...

Send us a text "I feel guilty" If you’ve escaped coercive control or domestic violence, you’re probably no stranger to guilt. Feeling responsible for the pain your abuser claims to suffer after you leave is common. In this episode, I explore what guilt is, why it's not always trustworthy, and how guilt can also be used by abusers to manipulate. Your safety and healing come first. You’re not alone, and that guilt doesn’t mean you made the wrong choice. References The psychoph...

Send us a text In this episode, I am joined by Kalesha, who bravely shares her personal story of surviving domestic abuse, and the current healing journey she is on. Together, we explore how children are often used as tools of manipulation and control in abusive relationships, which is a heartbreaking but critical aspect of coercive control that’s not discussed often enough. The interview is an open and honest conversation, and we hope you enjoy listening in! Visit escapetheparadox.com ...

Send us a text In this episode, I’m talking about how male privilege is used as a tool for control in abusive relationships. This isn’t just about physical violence. I focus on the subtle, everyday ways power and entitlement show up and are reflected hugely in overrepresentation of males in society, as well as the difficulties in approaching these institutions that are supposed to protect women, as a result. References Bancroft, L. (2003). Why Does He Do That? Inside The Minds of Angry ...

Send us a text In this episode, I continue analyzing past correspondence between myself and the abuser, focusing on the tactics of minimizing, denying, and blaming. I break down how these strategies are used to distort reality, shift responsibility, and keep targets trapped in cycles of self-doubt and confusion. By examining these patterns, I aim to bring clarity to the emotional and psychological impact of coercive control within abusive relationships. Together, we’ll explore the complexitie...

Send us a text In this episode, I explore a message I wrote to my father in 2023, and take you through his response with me. It’s a raw and honest conversation that highlights the tactics of minimizing, denying, and blaming, which are patterns that are reflected in the power and control wheel. These dynamics are deeply familiar to many who have lived through coercive control or emotional abuse and domestic violence in any form, and my hope is that by sharing my experience, you’ll feel seen, u...

Send us a text Isolation is one of the most powerful tools of coercive control, and it goes far beyond just cutting someone off from friends and family. In this episode, we explore how abusers use suspicion, false accusations, and emotional manipulation to make their targets feel trapped and alone—even in everyday interactions. Through Maxine’s story, we see how isolation operates in layers, chipping away at independence, self-trust, and access to support. Recognizing these tactics is the fir...

Send us a text Emotional abuse doesn’t just wound in the moment—it rewires the way we see ourselves. Over time, the insults, gaslighting, and manipulation become our own inner voice, eroding self-trust and self-worth. In Part 2, let's dive into how abuse shapes our internal narrative and what it takes to reclaim our sense of self. Most importantly, I want to remind you that the beliefs an abuser ingrains in you are not the truth. Healing is possible, and it starts with challenging their...

Send us a text Emotional abuse leaves no visible scars, but its impact runs deep. In this episode of Escape the Paradox, I talk about how emotional abuse erodes self-worth, distorts reality, and keeps targets trapped in cycles of self-doubt. I’ll share how it manifests in both subtle and overt ways, why it’s so difficult to recognize, and how the words and tactics used against me shaped my identity long after the abuse ended. Most importantly, I want to remind you that the beliefs...

Send us a text In this episode, I delve into the element of intimidation in abusive relationships and how it oppresses the target, making escape incredibly challenging. I also share my personal experience with the very real tactics abusers use to discredit their targets, adding even more layers of difficulty to leaving. Sources Please see this study regarding PTSD, and the associations between experiencing trauma and threats, as in DV/IPV/Child Abuse: Kredlow, A., Fenster, R. J., L...

Send us a text In this episode of Escape the Paradox, let's delve into the "Coercion and Threats" section of the Power and Control Wheel. Learn how abusers use coercive tactics to instill fear and maintain control over their targets. Learn to recognize these behaviors, and understand their impact. Whether you're seeking clarity or supporting someone you care about, this episode sheds light on the covert, and difficult to verbalize, dynamics of coercive control. Sources I reference the Power...

Send us a text In this very first episode of Escape the Paradox, I explore a common misconception: the idea that labeling an abuser—whether as a narcissist, psychopath, or anything else—somehow explains, or excuses, their behavior. Abuse isn’t about a diagnosis; it’s about actions. We dive into why focusing on labels can shift the conversation away from what really matters: the harm caused and the patterns of control, intimidation, and manipulation that define abuse. Join me as we unco...

Send us a text This podcast discusses sensitive topics, including coercive control and the emotional impact of abuse. In this introduction, I share why I believe it’s so important to learn how to verbalize the impact coercive control has. By sharing my truth, I hope to help others do the same. I’m claiming my narrative, and healing alongside you. By sharing my own story, I hope to show others that it’s not only possible to break the silence, but it’s also an essential step in the healing pr...