Dawson gazes into the distance and all he sees is his own, endless virginity.



We slip in and out of your podcast feed like a ninja in the night, depositing an episode, and disappearing like a memory on the wind. This week we are slipping Season 3 Episode 1: Like a Virgin under your pillow. Dawson is back from camp or wherever the hell he went after narcing on Joey’s dad, and he meets a sexy femme fatale on the bus. Joey and Pacey are holding down the fort. And Jen and Jack have entered a comfortable, if sexless, common law marriage. The stage is set for hand jobs!

There is no way Dawson is not just surrounding Jen in a cloud of urine right now.



We are back in Capeside for a week and let me tell you: It feels good. This week we had just enough time to bust out a randomly selected episode for your listening pleasure, and RNGesus decided it shall be Season 2 episode 9, Election. In which young Andie finds herself running for class president, and being verbally assaulted by that scamp Abby Morgan. Simultaneous to that Jen is trying to show Dawson what it is like to be a real boy, and not some weird Steven Spielberg fantasy robot. It’s a good ep, lots of meat for the Pandie freaks if that’s your bag. We also talk about our summer, complain about another TV show, and give some book reccomendos.

Long time no… type episode description to. So ya boys are back to drop a hot COTW track on the internet, but not without ulterior motives. We are finally announcing our new podcast project, and we thought the best place to do it was the place that started it all (and the place with the most subscribers *cough*). But we can’t come empty handed, so we also rolled up a rando DC and were not unhappy with the results. Please listen to hear all the hot deets about the upcoming High Tech Low Life Podcast, and to listen to us slip back into the oh-so-comforting embrace of early-mid Dawson’s Creek.

It occurred to me too late that we should post a pic of ourselves for the last ep, so instead here are two slightly less attractive and less charismatic white guys.



Seven years ago we decided to abandon our music podcast idea and do something silly for our own amusement that we never thought anyone would listen to. Rewatch podcasts existed at the time, but nobody was doing random episodes (still aren’t), and why would they? It’s an utterly stupid format for a show. Thankfully, “stupid” was right in our wheelhouse, and we embraced it. Seven years later we’ve joined the community, interviewed cast members, and made actual real friends as a result. What a weird and unexpected joy this has been. Thanks everyone who listened, voicemailed, emailed, tweeted, retweeted, commented, rated, reviewed, wrote fanfic, recorded music, or ever said a single nice thing about COTW over the last 7 years. It’s been awesome. Here’s an episode of us watching the Dawson’s Creek Finale for like the hundredth time.

Papa Emoiratus



Oh wow, my last Schitt’s Creek episode description. I don’t even know how to begin. You all know the jist of the episode: David gets married and then the whole gang separates off to live their new successful lives, having learned a myriad of lessons from their time spent in the Creek. In many ways, this show has matured greatly over the course of it’s six seasons. What started as a pretty basic fish-out-of-water story, became a heartfelt tribute to family and friendship. However in the most important ways this show has not matured at all, as the central plot point of the finale of this Emmy-winning sitcom masterpiece… is a hand job joke.



Sweaters and handplay, our theme song remained true ’til the very end.

I gotta be honest, I saw this picture and the first thing that came to mind was: I bet Dan Levy (and for that matter David Rose) smells great. Just the perfect fragrance for any situation. It’s not a funny caption but it’s honest, dammit.



Wow everyone, we have very nearly made it. A few more steps and we will have summitted the peak of Schitt Mountain. Our oxygen is getting low, we passed several long dead corpses on the way up, and we only have a few minutes to enjoy it before we have to descend or else risk joining them in the icy embrace of death… you know what this metaphor is getting confused so I think I’ll start over.



Wow everyone, we have very nearly made it. A few more strides and we have finished Schitt Marathon. 25.2 miles of Schitt are behind us and with only one to go our victory is nearly assured. We’ve pissed ourselves twice, and all that remains of our nipples is the bloodstain on the inside of our Umbro moisture wicking atheletic t-shirt…. Nope, I did it again. One more try.



Wow everyone, we have very nearly made it. One more episode and we will have watched the entirety of Schitt’s Creek and commentated upon it for your listening pleasure. Hopefully Creek of the Week is able to go out as strongly as the show which provides all its content, but considering that show has a team of talented writers, producers, and an incredibly charismatic cast, while this show is a couple of jagoffs yelling at each other over the top of said talented performances, it probably will not. Be that as it may we are all in this together. Please enjoy the pppeeenultimate episode of Schitt’s Creek with us. You probably already know what happens.

Say goodnight, not goodbye, Moira. Soon we may part, but we will always have Spotify (at least as long as we keep paying for hosting).



So, Schitt’s Creek is finally getting around to wrapping Schitt up, which means we have to figure out what is in store for Johnny, Moira, David, Alexis, and the rest. This episode focuses on Johnny, Stevie, and Roland and their attempt to turn their little roadside motel into a massive corporate chain. Before the big bucks can roll in, they have to attend an actual New York board meeting, and I’m sure Roland won’t be any kind of aquatic swimming animal outside of his natural liquid habitat whatsoever. Also we get a peek into trouble with Patrick and David as David seems keen to leave the Creek, but Patrick may not feel the same. Two to go!

Thinking about picking up a couple of these for in-person recordings.



Hey there, kittens! Only a few creeks left for you to dip your toes into, but thankfully this one is a good one. It’s bachelor party time before David’s wedding, and Stevie is in charge of planning. The itenerary includes escape rooms and drinks, but the rest of the Rose family is a little distracted. Johnny is expecting an important call from a big investor, and Alexis is realizing she’s a big fish outgrowing her small pond, and Moira is just being fabulous and hilarious as always.

I’m not going to lie, I only picked this screenshot because I’m friggin’ starving, you got any wedding sample platters back there?



As the sun rises on a new baby podcast, springing forth fully formed from the heads of it’s hosts, so too must it eventually set, returning to those same fractured skulls to burrow deep into the cranial-goo where it will fester and mutate into deep regret. Regret over the thousands of hours of improvised commentary that could, at any moment, be dredged up by family, the feds, or the dreaded cancel culture and ruin said hosts lives forever! That is the situation we find ourselves in during these twilight hours of Creek of the Week, our skulls agape, that podcast, once a delicate fledgling, now an ancient and decrepit albatross cresting the horizon on a collision course with the wombs that birthed it, and the graves that will see it entombed forever.



What was I saying? Oh yeah, this week Moira gets an offer to return to her old soap and Alexis manages to help her even though she is going through some stuff. Johnny, meanwhile, is paying for David’s catering and David has expensive tastes. It’s a fun ep that really starts to set up the beginning of the end.

The box. You opened it. We came. Now you must come with us, taste our pleasures.



What a week we have in store for you my little Schittobites. After our usual beginning-of-show-BS we hop in and watch Alexis make some poor life decisions with an old man while Johnny attempts offer some fatherly warnings to her would-be suitor. Meanwhile Moira goes sans-Publicist and attempts to right the horrible faux pas that has landed her in trouble with the locals. Lastly David & Patrick take on a new hire at the store who is equal parts enthusiastic and unenthusiastic about the position spoiler alert: It’s Jocelyn.

[Don’t forget to insert a funny caption here before you click “publish” If you’re reading this I forgot, or is this all just a bit? You’ll never know and I’ll never tell]



Cults are fun, this week most of the Schitts Creek women are almost indoctrinated into one. Meanwhile Moira and David get hammered on terrible wine, and Johnny bonds with Patrick. Your hosts discuss super important things like purchasing hard-to-find electronics, and removing twitter contacts. HOT CONTENT!

Some screen grabs are just for MTSG, and that’s OK.



Wow folks, 300 episodes. I think we have about 7 more in us then it’s time to bounce. But don’t let the impending demise of your fifth favorite podcast distract from the hilarious romp we have for you this week. There are misunderstandings aplenty as the threesome Patrick and David think they are going to turns out to be an orgy. Also Bob needs to get laid, and Alexis has to make an important decision effecting her career and personal life. This is a good one. Happy 300!

The Rose’s visit creekoftheweek.com and count the number of remaining episodes with a look of concern.



Put on your best skinny jeans and roll out the merlot rug, it’s time for the premiere of The Crowening, and all the heavy hitters of Schitt’s Creek (heavy Schitters?) are making their debuts. While Alexis & Moira deal with that, Stevie struggles with her decision to return to the motel business, and David struggles with a very high and freshly de-toothed Patrick. For me this is one of the more memorable episodes, so come listen to it be ruined by us blathering over the top of it.

Moira sporting headwear from the King Buzzo Collection. Magnificent.



It’s Schitt time again folks, and this week’s is a hoot. Moira is very excited about the release of a trailer for her upcoming feature Crows 3: The Crowening, however not all of her friends share her elation. Also Johnny and Roland have to figure out why a guy at their new motel has a sack of money and a gun. They, of course, take him at his word when he says everything is totally fine and normal. Lastly there has been a mixup as to who will be David’s Maid of Honour, so Alexis and Stevie need to work out the details of their duties. What a romp! And what a rump on that Chris Elliot, am I right? Meow! What? The write up is still recording? Edit the rump stuff out, please.

Your reaction when you saw that COTW was late this week.



Oh hello, I didn’t see you there. Welcome to Creek of the Week Inc. Come on in and have a seat. Looking over your resume I see you have extensive experience in the field of “having amazing taste in podcasts”, good good. I also see that you’ve listed your biggest weakness as “only leaves 5 star itunes reviews once a month instead of once a week”. I think we can work with that. Honestly you seem perfect for the job, so you’re hired! Wages start at one podcast per week (two if you are interested in overtime at our other department, Johnny Mnminute) and of course, all the twitter posts you can consume. Welcome aboard!











Nice Job Eric, another stellar bit. SNL will be calling any day now.

Patrick showing off his new Dune stillsuit PJs. TOPICAL CAPTION!



Ya ever pee the bed as an adult? Sound off in the comments, then tune in to see if your hosts have. One person we know has definitely peed the bed is David Rose, and that is the main story in this episode. Concurrently we have Alexis handling the burgeoning social media presence of her mother, then our two stories collide as Moira livestreams a conversation about David’s previous “incidents”. Also, Johnny and Stevie go to look at a new motel to purchase, with Roland in tow, but end up attending a funeral instead. Hijinks galore!

I don’t have a good caption for this except to point out how exceptional that necklace/amulet thing is.



This week’s episode is an interesting one. Our extended pre-show banter recounts a harrowing, and often objectively hilarious tale, of the events of the previous week for one of your beloved hosts. That undersells it, but I’m trying to keep spoilers out of the episode description so you’ll just have to listen. Afterward we watch the season 6 premier of Schitt’s Creek, in which David & Patrick look for a wedding venue while Moira recovers from her breakdown.

Stevie is missing and the play is about to begin. David is thwarted at every turn in his attempts at a dramatic engagement announcement. Alexis is bummed that she'll be missing out on fun stuff.

Johnny stares into the abyss of death. Alexis googles "intense boating disasters". David & Patrick get up to some shenanigans on a mountainside.

Moira, thank you for your concern, but we are fine and we have a new episode ready right now.



Hey kiddos, Sorry for the brief hiatus, but we are back with another banger. This week’s episode of Schitt’s Creek doesn’t have a lot of drama but makes up for it in laughs, as it is, in this host’s humble opinion, one of the funnier episodes of the season. Johnny has to fill in for Moira at the roast of the town mayor, and it turns out he’s not very good at it. Naturally he enlists help of the townies to give him some tips. Patrick and Stevie have a dark secret they desperately want to keep from Moira, and Alexis learns that her beloved has been accepted to study in the Galapagos.