If anxiety had a sporting event, you’d be a decorated athlete.
Heart pounding? Gold medal.
Jaw clenched? Silver.
Overthinking a text from 3 days ago? Hell yeah, podium finish.
This episode isn’t about calming down — it’s about getting that chaotic energy out of your body before you spontaneously combust. We’re ditching the mindfulness apps and doing six full-body nervous system resets that actually work.
You’ll shake like a confused gazelle, growl like a rabid Wookiee, and sigh so hard your neighbors might call for a wellness check. Every weird-ass movement has a scientific reason (and zero shame attached).
By the end, you’ll feel human again — not perfect, not zen, but grounded enough to remember that regulation doesn’t mean calm; it means coming home to your body, one ridiculous breath at a time.