️ Part 2 of our Halloween series: Monsters as Mirrors ️If today’s monsters reflect modern fears…what were we afraid of 500 years ago? In this time-travelling episode, Kristin and Laura head back to the past to ask: where did our monsters come from, and what were they covering up? From witch trials to mummies, this episode unpacks: Why werewolves symbolised the “untamed man” Why vampires became sexualised aristocrats How zombies reflect fears of slavery, exploitation, and soulless labor Why Frankenstein is really about abandonment, control, and man-made monsters How the fear of women’s knowledge shaped the witch hunts Why the empire was haunted by the mummy’s curse With just enough disgust psychology, imperialist critique, and literary nerdery to keep it weird, this episode explores how each monster reveals what power wanted to hide.

This is Part 1 of our special Halloween series: Monsters as Mirrors What if our monsters say more about us than them? In this episode, Kristin and Laura explore how monsters are a social mirror...a way for powerful systems to project fear, control bodies, and avoid accountability. From witches to AI, we unpack how "the monster" is used to enforce social boundaries, uphold hierarchies, and distract from systemic rot. We dive into: Why power needs monsters The psychology of disgust, projection, and containment The “gendered monster” (hello, feminazi, hysteric, witch) The monstering of trans people in today’s culture wars Immigration panic as moral drama Why it’s not AI we should fear, but who’s controlling it Monster narratives in Harry Potter, Stranger Things, Beauty & the Beast, and more This is a funny, furious, psychologically rich dive into how systems displace blame, turn people into problems, and manufacture fear to maintain control.

In the final episode of our alt-right pipeline series, we explore what happens after the soft aesthetics and curated control stop working. Kristin and Laura dig into the messy, often shame-filled reality of trying to leave a system that promised empowerment and control, but in reality, delivers performance, exhaustion, obedience, and even harm. We unpack: Why leaving can feel like an identity collapse The shame, grief, and cognitive dissonance that keep people stuck How privilege, power, and proximity to safety work in subtle ways The psychological withdrawal of leaving a “safe” space  Why wellness aesthetics, obedience, and beauty are never neutral How to rebuild after complicity, and what real empowerment looks like This episode is about the exit phase and the fear, backlash, and even shame that comes with it. Because leaving is hard, but staying silent costs more.

In Part 2 of our series on the alt-right pipeline for women, we explore how wellness aesthetics and therapeutic language become tools of discipline, not liberation. Kristin and Laura dissect the soft side of authoritarianism - how empowerment becomes obedience, rest becomes performance, and the internet whispers: “Shh, just be palatable.” ✨ This episode unpacks: The rise of the “soft girl era” and why it feels so good How language like “divine feminine” & “high value woman” bypasses critical thought Performative healing and the pressure to be beautiful, agreeable, and obedient Why white femininity is positioned as almost powerful, and how that keeps us compliant Capitalism, shame, and the weaponisation of lifestyle content Personal reflections on burnout, skincare, and craving control in a chaotic world We also talk through the Charlie Kirk aftermath and how authoritarian systems use language to consolidate power, reframe critique as violence, and shame us into silence. It’s not just “tradwives” and Pinterest boards, it’s about who gets to feel safe in the system, and why the algorithm keeps pulling us back in.

In Part 1 of our three-part series, Kristin, Laura, and special guest Jess Britvich explore how women are being pulled into the alt-right — not with overt violence, but with pastel aesthetics, self-help promises, and weaponised femininity. Together, we explore:• How tradwife culture makes patriarchy look like wellness• Why the pipeline starts with fear, loneliness, and control• The role of aesthetics, algorithms, and “just asking questions”• What it costs to be palatable, agreeable, and silent• The link between white feminism, beauty politics & authoritarian 'vibes' This is about how systems sell us safety by asking us to shrink back into 'acceptable' roles...and how easy it is to disappear down the rabbit hole, one soft pink post at a time. Jess's Socials: https://linktr.ee/jessbritvich?utm_source=linktree_profile_share<sid=50dcf621-7f0a-47ae-bc3f-d35b6900f570 But Why Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod 

Sometimes it's the spoon scraping the bowl. Or the tag on your shirt. Or the wind in your ears. And suddenly...it's all too much. In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack the messy, invisible world of sensory stress and how it shapes daily life for many people (often neurodivergent). From autistic shutdowns to ADHD overstimulation, they explore why modern environments are hostile to our nervous systems, and what it means to live in a world not built for your brain. They dig into:• What sensory stress really is, and why it's not “just being sensitive”• The difference between ADHD and autistic sensory experiences• Guilt, shame & why masking becomes a survival tool• Why seemingly small things can lead to big crashes• How to recognise, respect, and respond to sensory needs in yourself and others This is a call to stop pathologising sensory needs, start redesigning our environments, and finally ask: what if the world is just too loud and we weren’t meant to tolerate it?

What do silverback gorillas, burnout, and barstool bravado have in common? More than you think. In this brilliantly bizarre episode, Kristin and Laura are joined by psychologist and burnout researcher Dr. Pete Olusoga to unpack why 100 men vs 1 gorilla became a cultural obsession — and what it reveals about masculinity, performance, and emotional repression. Together, they unpack:• The “alpha male” myth and its viral appeal• Why masculinity feels performative, fragile, and exhausting• The psychology of burnout and who it’s selling out• What TikTok fitness bros and Jordan Peterson have in common• Why being “a real man” might just burn you out From the manosphere to the therapist’s couch, this is a wild ride through memes, masculinity, and what it really means to be resilient. Spoiler: You don’t need to fight a gorilla to prove your worth. Pete's Details: Insta: @dr_pete_olusoga / @eightypercentmental TikTok: @dr_pete_olusoga Web: www.eightypercentmental.com But Why Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod 

From sleep scores to step counts, even our joy is being tracked. But who is all this “self-improvement” really for? In this episode, Kristin and Laura ask what happens when being human stops being the goal and starts being a problem to fix. They unpack the rise of over-optimization, how capitalism convinced us we’re machines, and why even therapy isn’t safe from performance culture. Together, they explore:• The history of optimization — from factory floors to Fitbits• Why rest, joy, and creativity feel “unproductive”• How wellness culture became capitalism in disguise• Why therapy doesn’t work when it mimics the systems we’re trying to survive• How to reclaim unoptimized joy, boredom, and being for the sake of being This is a call to step off the treadmill, turn off the tracker, and return to what makes us human. Even if it’s messy. Especially because it’s messy. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

 From “not all men” to “I was just joking,” defensiveness is everywhere. But what’s really going on underneath? In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack the psychology of defensiveness - how it protects us, how it shows up in everyday interactions, and how it connects to deeper systems of power. With stories about awkward meetings, parenting, and fragile masculinity, they explore:• Why our brains go into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn• The difference between guilt and shame (and why it matters)• How whiteness, masculinity, and identity get tangled in pushback• Why vulnerability is framed as weakness, and who benefits• What defensiveness looks like in relationships, work, and culture This is a compassionate but clear-eyed conversation about why being wrong feels so threatening — and what’s possible when we pause, get curious, and choose accountability instead. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod 

 In this special guest episode, Kristin and Laura are joined by Oliver Niehaus to explore why so many men and boys are being pulled into the Manosphere. From red pill influencers to anti-intellectual rants and fragile masculinity, we unpack:• Why the manosphere sells grievance disguised as growth• How patriarchy harms men — and why they struggle to admit it• The role of loneliness, algorithms, and masculinity myths• The difference between accountability and shame• How fear of women’s power fuels cultural backlash With personal stories, critical insight, and plenty of systemic analysis, this episode dives deep into what happens when culture tells men they’re owed something — and robs them of connection instead.Spoiler: they’re being sold a lie. And it’s costing everyone. You can find Oliver on Youtube @oliverniehaus, Instagram @olivermniehaus, and TikTok @oliver.niehaus As always, head to our linktree for the podcast and Kristin and Laura's socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

In this thought-provoking episode, Kristin and Laura ask why women’s joy so often gets dismissed as “basic.” From Taylor Swift fandoms to fantasy novels, they unpack the deep psychological roots of how gendered taste is constructed—and why we feel guilty for what we love. They dive into:• Why "guilty pleasures" are a feminist issue• The Enlightenment origins of the gender binary• How cultural legitimacy is shaped by patriarchy• The impact of internalized misogyny on hobbies and identity• Personal stories of navigating shame, taste, and authenticity This episode is a celebration of reclaiming joy, challenging cultural scripts, and asking: what if liking what we like was radical?

In this episode, Kristin and Laura take a psychological deep dive into Netflix’s Adolescence, a gripping series that explores how one teenage boy ends up committing an unthinkable act. But instead of focusing on who did it, the show—and this conversation—asks why. Together, we explore: • What incel culture is and how boys are drawn into it • The role of social media, masculinity myths, and loneliness • How families and schools can better support emotional growth • Why girls' safety is still treated as secondary • The emotional toll of being unheard—for everyone This episode is about more than one story. It’s about the cultural conditions we’ve created—and the conversations we still need to have. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

From Yorkie bars to Olympic podiums, women in sport have always faced more than just the competition. In this episode, Kristin and Laura explore how sport has been systematically shaped to exclude women — and how this exclusion is still happening today. From overt bans in the 20th century to TikTok trolls and pay gaps in 2025, we unpack: • Why women were banned from football and basketball for decades • How media growth aligned with shutting women out of sport • The myth of “no one watches women’s sport” — and why it's wrong • Why misogyny thrives in comment sections and boardrooms alike • What it means to play, coach, and exist in systems never built for you This is a call to name the backlash for what it is — and to keep showing up anyway. Because every time women step onto the field, they’re doing more than playing. They’re refusing to disappear. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

From bicycles to boardrooms, women’s progress has always triggered backlash. In this episode, Kristin and Laura trace a powerful throughline across 140 years of history — showing how each leap forward for women has been met with a push to drag them back. We unpack: • Why “bicycle face” was invented to stop women riding freely • How 1950s housewives were drugged into compliance • The flapper, the feminist, and the fear of female autonomy • How sport, beauty, and motherhood became tools of control • The resurgence of incel culture and tradwives in today’s algorithmic patriarchy From hysterical diagnoses to TikTok misogyny, this episode asks: What are they really so afraid of? And why does our joy, our freedom, and our power keep becoming the battleground?  Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

Is it burnout, is it capitalism, or are you just lazy? (Spoiler: it’s not the last one.) In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack what motivation actually is — and why we keep expecting ourselves to push through exhaustion like it’s a personal failure. Guided by Self-Determination Theory (SDT), they explore: • The difference between high vs low quality motivation • Why guilt and shame don't lead to lasting change • How our basic psychological needs shape behavior • What happens when society conflicts with human motivation • Neurodivergence, hyperfocus, and demand avoidance From dishwasher-loading rules to existential dread and fascism, it’s all here. If you’ve ever wondered why you “just can’t make yourself do it,” this episode offers answers — and maybe a little permission to be kinder to yourself.  Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

In this episode, Kristin and Laura are joined by Amy and Jen to unpack their latest books Myths of Sport Performance and Women Working in Sport. From gender bias in coaching to the emotional toll of surviving male-dominated spaces, we explore: • Why performance myths won’t die — and who profits when they stay alive • The gap between academia and social media “truths” • What’s missing from mainstream conversations about equity in sport • Pregnancy, performance, and invisible barriers • Why women still leave sport — and what happens when we stay It’s part myth-busting, part storytelling, and all truth. Because women working in sport are not new — we’ve just never been listened to. Socials/Links: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod Myths of Sport Performance: https://www.sequoia-books.com/catalog/sport/  

It’s our holiday party and we’re breaking down the science (and the BS) of New Year’s resolutions — all while sipping wine, comparing tattoos, and trying not to set anything on fire. In this festive-but-serious episode, Kristin and Laura explore:• Why so many resolutions fall apart by February• How to make goals that actually work for you• The psychology behind outcome, process, and open goals• What neurodivergence, shame, and survival mode have to do with “laziness”• Why self-acceptance — not pressure — is the key to real change It’s part party, part pep talk, part therapy. Settle in with your weirdest wine glass, grab a snack you love, and remember: you’re not lazy. You’re tired, human, and trying your best. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

In this follow-up to our general burnout episode, Kristin and Laura explore what burnout looks like through a neurodivergent lens — and why it so often goes unrecognised, misdiagnosed, or misunderstood. Between chaotic mornings, ADHD hyperfocus, executive dysfunction, and autistic masking, we unpack:• What autistic and ADHD burnout really feel like• The difference between executive dysfunction and laziness• Why burnout in neurodivergent people is often mistaken for depression or anxiety• How gender roles, stigma, and social expectations shape late diagnoses• What it means to rest, recover, and set boundaries that actually work It’s part research, part lived experience, and all honesty — with a few chaotic tangents and candle mishaps along the way. You’re not broken. You’re burnt out. And you’re not alone. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod  

We were going to do something light and fun. But then… we remembered we’re burnt out. In this episode, Kristin and Laura explore the complex emotional, physical, and political layers of burnout — not just as a personal feeling, but as a symptom of the systems we live in. Between rainbow sightings, chaotic dog farts, and some very real science, we unpack:• What burnout really is (and why most people don’t know)• How capitalism, patriarchy, and perfectionism fuel exhaustion• Why women experience burnout more — and feel guiltier for it• The toxic myth of "time management" as a fix-all• What rest actually looks like across different neurotypes This is not a productivity episode. It’s a psychological deep-dive into why we’re all so tired, and what it might take to step off the treadmill — even just a little.  Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod

Why do we blame ourselves for things that aren’t really our fault? In this deeply human (and deeply caffeinated) episode, Kristin and Laura explore the socioecological model — a powerful psychological framework that explains how our personal struggles are shaped by the people, places, and politics around us. With stories about concussion panic, dog therapy, sport sexism, and burnout, we unpack:• Why self-blame misses the point• How your workplace, relationships, and culture interact• The difference between purpose and meaning (and why that matters)• How stereotypes and policies trickle down into everyday life• Why women get asked to make the tea — and what that really says This episode is part psych theory, part personal spiral, part feminist reframe. If you’ve ever felt broken, too sensitive, or just exhausted by “doing it all,” this one’s for you. Because maybe it’s not you. Maybe it’s the system. Socials: https://linktr.ee/butwhy.pod