This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand, and co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie invite listeners into their group chat — the place where wild dilemmas get sent. Some never make it to the podcast because they're just too outrageous… but today, they’re tackling two viral moments that had people talking.

The first? A woman who bought food for her six biological children but not for her stepchild. Her husband asked, but she didn’t see anything wrong with it. The ladies get heated as they unpack whether this is the ultimate “wicked stepmother” behaviour, and question why the dad stood by and let it happen.

The second? A stepdad who wasn’t invited to his stepdaughter’s graduation, despite being in her life since she was four months old. Hurt, he decided to cut off financial support. The panel debates whether this was justified or damaging, asking: what role did the mother play, and is this about boundaries or bitterness?

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and is joined by co-hosts Nathalie and her husband, Sayce Holmes-Lewis, to unpack a dilemma from a stepmum who feels her partner is still doing a lot for his ex and is starting to wonder if she’s being jealous and petty, or if there’s a real cause for concern.

Nathalie believes a man should always be there for the mother of his child but Kate and Sayce disagree they think boundaries are essential, and that being an ex means you don’t get the same privileges as when you were in a relationship. So where is the line?

The trio discuss what’s “too far” when it comes to helping an ex, how to keep the focus on the child’s wellbeing, and why clear boundaries protect everyone. Sayce also shares an overlooked male perspective, how moving out of the family home and not seeing your children every day can be an emotional struggle, and why men need to prepare themselves for that shift.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a heartbreak that many stepmums quietly carry: the grief of losing their stepchildren after a breakup.

A listener writes in devastation after her relationship ended not because of the partner, but because she no longer gets to see the children she helped raise. Their mother doesn’t think it’s appropriate, and just like that, it’s like she never existed.

The panel discuss the emotional fallout stepmums can face when love isn’t “enough” to grant them long-term connection even after years of parenting. Kate opens up about how this exact scenario has always been one of her biggest fears and admits she doesn’t think she’d cope.

Cilla reflects on the reality vs. the ideal reminding us that we don’t live in a world where every bond is protected just because it’s real. And Nathalie asks the big question: what impact does it have on the children when someone who loves them simply disappears?

This is a powerful conversation about invisible grief, unspoken heartbreak, and the emotional toll of loving children you don’t legally “own.” Because when stepmums are told to love like a parent but let go like a stranger.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla along with very special guest co-host Nieki Shaw , a child protection solicitor, co-parenting mentor and the founder of Legally Nik, where she helps families navigate complex legal realities around blended families and co-parenting.

We get so many legal dilemmas on this podcast, and while we’re always here to share our experiences — this week, we brought in an expert.

Nik answers two powerful dilemmas from listeners:

One from a stepmum wondering what rights she’d have if something ever happened to her partner and whether she’d legally be able to stay in the child’s life.

And another where a stepmum posted a photo online, and the biological mum cut off all contact, raising urgent questions around parental alienation, boundaries, and protecting the child’s relationship with both parents.

Nik breaks down what parental responsibility really means, and when a Stepparent Responsibility Order might be needed. She explains the difference between “lives with” orders and “spends time with” orders, when to apply for Specific Issue Orders, and why the Welfare Checklist is at the heart of every child-based legal decision in the UK.

They also explore why there’s no such thing as “full custody” in the UK, how to prepare if you’re going to represent yourself in court including the role a McKenzie Friend can play in supporting you through the process. Nik also talks about why it’s so important to put your wishes in writing, especially when it comes to children and wills and why this is even more essential when a stepparent is involved.  

Check out Legally Nik's Website

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie for an honest conversation about one of the biggest pressures new parents face in blended families — how do you start conversations about the values, routines, and boundaries you want for your first child together… without causing offence?

A listener writes in, worried about how to bring up parenting differences with her partner. She’s about to have their first baby together and doesn’t want him assuming things will be the same as with his older kids. But how do you have that conversation without it sounding like you’re criticising his parenting?

The ladies discuss why values and routines aren’t just about control they’re about raising healthy, secure children. Nathalie argues that setting boundaries and not encouraging can make kids rebel, while Cilla believes there are times children need firm direction, even if it’s hard in the moment.

They also share tips on how to start the conversation without comparing or criticising — and why nothing should be left to chance when it comes to raising kids in a blended home.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and special guest co-host Jamelia — singer, songwriter, actress, and mum. 

Jamelia speaks openly and honestly about her own blended family experience, the heartbreak she faced, what her kids went through, and why she wouldn’t be part of a blended family again. She shares how, at times, she genuinely thought she wouldn’t make it through and why she'd now choose to keep her relationships separate.

The panel also tackles a dilemma from a mum whose daughter isn’t coping with her new blended setup; the kids just aren’t clicking, and it’s making life at home uncomfortable. Jamelia reflects on how her own daughter felt when someone moved in, and Kate asks whether you can really be happy in a relationship if the children aren’t.

Cilla shares why she believes children are allowed to feel sad about big changes and why sometimes you have to sit in the uncomfortable moments as a family.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate is joined by Cilla and Nathalie to explore a dilemma that hits hard for so many women in blended families: loving your partner, loving their children but still wanting a baby of your own.

A listener writes in to say she’s been a stepmum for five years and adores her partner’s children but she’s always imagined having her own baby too. The problem? Her partner says he’s done. No more kids. And now she’s wondering if she can really accept that… or if she’s risking a lifetime of regret.

The ladies explore what it means to compromise on something this big and whether love alone is enough when your dreams don’t align. They also reflect on how desires can shift, how long you should “wait and see" before resentment kicks in.

Cilla shares the emotional story of someone who waited, missed her window, and ended up heartbroken. They also reflect on the pressure of the biological clock, the power of honesty, and the importance of advocating for what you want before it’s too late.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and special guest co-host Rio to respond to a heartfelt dilemma from a listener asking how she can best support her brother, a single dad raising two daughters on his own.  

Rio shares his personal experiences of solo parenting after loss, opening up about the emotional guilt of leaving your children even briefly, the pressure to always “get it right,” and why having a support system matters so much. 

The conversation turns to the emotional wellbeing of single dads how men can be encouraged to look after themselves, make space to date again, and allow themselves to feel.

Kate becomes emotional as she reflects on her stepchildren’s experiences with grief and how her understanding has deepened now that she’s also a biological mum. 

Together, the trio explore how solo parents, especially fathers can be supported emotionally, practically, and socially without judgment.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a dilemma that so many stepparents silently struggle with: discipline.

A listener writes in feeling completely overridden by her partner when it comes to setting boundaries with his children. She tried to discipline calmly and respectfully but he jumped in, reversed her decision, and made her feel like she had no right to step in at all.

The trio discusses what discipline should look like in blended homes, and how stepparents can feel confident in their role without overstepping. Is discipline only for biological parents? What message does it send to children when their stepparent’s authority is constantly undermined?

They also explore how couples can get on the same page when it comes to parenting, the difference between discipline and telling off, and why real teamwork is essential

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-host Nathalie and special guest co-host Ashley John-Baptiste — , journalist, documentary-maker and now author of Looked After, his powerful memoir.

Ashley’s no stranger to the podcast and he’s back to talk about his own story growing up in the UK care system, living with five different families, and never quite feeling like he belonged. In this emotional and honest conversation, he shares how that shaped his sense of identity, his education, his relationships, and the kind of father he is today.

The trio also tackle a heartfelt dilemma from a listener who's trying to help her foster son feel welcomed into their family especially by her partner, who’s parenting for the first time. Ashley shares real insight into what children in care may be feeling in moments like this, while Nathalie opens up about her own past and how childhood trauma can lead to emotional walls and coping mechanisms.

This is a moving episode about identity, resilience, and the healing power of love and a reminder that family isn’t always where you start, but what you grow.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, it’s the Father’s Day special and Kate’s handed over the mic. Rio Ferdinand takes on hosting duties, joined by Cilla’s husband Philo Appeaning and Nathalie’s husband Sayce Holmes-Lewis for a rare and honest conversation from the men’s side of the blended family dynamic.

The trio tackle a dilemma sent in by a man who didn’t tell his partner that his ex would be at a party he was taking his daughter to. When she found out, it caused serious drama but now he’s asking: should you always tell your partner the truth, even if you know it’ll cause problems?

That sparks a deeper chat about communication in relationships, how the men have evolved emotionally since their younger years, and the impact their wives have had on the way they express themselves now.

They reflect on how easy it is to slip back into old patterns, and why working on emotional growth in your home is worth the effort especially when you’re trying to break cycles.

They also open up about boundaries with exes and extended family, and share how those lines have had to shift over time to protect their wives and their peace.

Then comes the surprise: Kate hits them with some loaded questions submitted by their wives and they have to answer on the spot. Plus, they have a proud moment as they hear unexpected Father’s Day messages from their children.  

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie for a powerful and deeply personal episode. For the first time, the ladies speak not from the perspective of parents but as the children of single-parent homes.

They open up about how growing up without a father in the house shaped their understanding of love, trust, and family. From not knowing how to have a platonic relationship with a man to struggling to understand how your husband can love you without conditions they open up about the emotional impact of growing up in homes where love looked different.

Cilla gets emotional as she reflects on how certain moments from her past still leave her feeling disappointed and hurt and how that has shown up in her adult life and relationships.

The trio also discuss how they’re doing the work to break generational cycles, raising their own children differently, and learning that healing can happen at the same time as parenting.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a dilemma that hits deep for many stepparents — feeling left out, even when you’ve been fully present. A listener shares that she wasn’t invited to her stepdaughter’s birthday party, which is being held at the mum’s house, and it's left her feeling sidelined. She’s been a part of her partner’s daughter’s life for 3 years and thought their bond meant more but now she’s questioning her place in the bigger moments.

The trio reflect on the unspoken boundaries of blended family life. Should you expect to be welcomed into someone else’s safe space, like their home? Or is it fair to suggest neutral locations or even host your own celebration?

The ladies explore whether we expect too much too soon as stepparents, or whether exclusion from big milestones like birthdays and school events says more about unresolved tensions between adults. They also dig into how confrontation gets a bad wrap especially for women and why speaking up isn’t about ego, but about protecting your peace.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to talk about one of the most emotional and overlooked issues in blended families — money.

The conversation is sparked by a dilemma from a stepmum who financially supports her partner’s children but feels completely shut out of the decision-making. With talk of private school on the table and no voice in the conversation, she’s left wondering: am I being manipulated, or is this just part of being in a blended family?

They dive into the uncomfortable but necessary questions: Should financial contribution equal a say in parenting decisions? and Where’s the line between support and exploitation?

The trio reflect on the emotional costs that go beyond finances especially when step-parents raise children they have no legal rights to. From wills and inheritance to guardianship and long-term planning, they unpack why these conversations matter so much more in blended families.

One big question the group debates: Should parents leave different amounts to different children, based on what they’re already receiving from their other biological parent? Is fairness always equal or does it depend on circumstance?

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie for a tough but necessary conversation about something many families silently struggle with the different ways love can show up for biological and stepchildren.

This honest discussion is sparked after Kate asks her stepdaughter Tia to send a voice note sharing how she feels compared to her younger siblings and opens the door to one of the biggest debates yet.

They explore a powerful question: What is love? Is it a feeling, an action or both? And if you don’t feel the same for all your children, what can you do to make sure none of them feel left out?

They discuss how factors like living arrangements, age, time, and even permission to parent can all affect how love is shown and felt. When 1 in 3 families in the UK are blended, this is not a niche issue it’s a growing reality for so many.

The trio explore what happens when you don’t feel the same bond with your stepchildren and how you can still show up for them with care and consistency. They unpack the pressure stepmums often face to “love like a mum,” while also being told not to overstep.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this week’s episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie for one of the trickiest dilemmas they’ve tackled yet. A listener shares her story of planning to separate from her husband after years of being together but they’ve decided to carry on living under the same roof until their children turn 18.

Why? Because she’s terrified her son might choose to stay with his stepdad instead of her. It’s a heartbreaking situation that raises a huge question: can you separate without shattering your family?

The ladies explore the emotional weight of “staying for the kids,” and debate whether that decision protects children or simply delays the damage.

They reflect on research that shows children thrive in two-parent households and dig into how breakups affect kids no matter which parent leaves, highlighting that mothers can also be the ones who disrupt the home, not just the dads.

The trio share how they’d feel about having a stepparent now, as grown women, and the impact childhood trauma can have on how we move through relationships as adults and reflect on how their own upbringings in single-parent homes shaped their views.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to dive deep into what really happens when kids are raised across two homes with different sets of rules.

Cilla explains the real difference between co-parenting and parallel parenting, and why understanding the difference can save families a lot of conflict.

Kate, Cilla, and Nathalie each open up about their own parenting styles, how they set rules, maintain structure, and handle boundaries in their homes.

The trio also explore whether softer or stricter parenting styles actually get better reactions, and whether having different rules really confuses children long-term or if kids are more adaptable than we give them credit for. They also reflects on how children sometimes adapt their behaviour depending on which parent they're talking to and how kids can even learn to play parents off against each other when the rules aren't aligned .

If you’ve ever struggled with mixed messages, different expectations, or feeling like you're parenting in two completely different worlds, this episode is a must-listen.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this special episode, Kate Ferdinand is joined by her husband Rio and co-host Cilla to explore what it’s like to navigate blended family life from a male point of view. 

This week’s listener's dilemma asks: “Do I have to end my marriage if he won’t accept my child?” — sparking a deep and emotional conversation about loyalty, love, and the hard choices many blended families face.

The trio also tackle adult children moving back home, how it affects family dynamics, and what happens when one partner struggles with a stepchild returning to the household.

Rio shares his honest take on fatherhood, why men sometimes struggle to express how they feel, and why “firsts” in blended families can hit differently for men.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Being a stepmum without your own children? People have opinions.

Choosing not to have kids? Even more.

And if you want to be a mum but life has other plans? That’s a whole different kind of heartbreak.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Priscilla Appeaning and Nathalie Holmes-Lewis for a powerful and honest conversation about the pressure on women to sacrifice their bodies and mental health for motherhood, what it means to step-parent without biological children of your own, and how motherhood expectations shape emotional identity in blended families.

Cilla explains the difference between being childfree and childless. Kate reflects on her experience entering a blended family without children of her own and Nathalie opens up about her health journey and her decision around motherhood.

They also explore how “ours babies” , a term used in the blended family space to describe a child shared by both partners, can impact identity, connection, and emotional roles for women who aren’t biological mums.

Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Priscilla Appeaning and Nathalie Holmes-Lewis for another real, raw and relatable episode of Blended. This one’s all about family drama, blurred boundaries—and one photo that caused major tension.

In this episode, they dive into a dilemma that had the group chat on fire: A mother-in-law gifts a photo of a child’s half-sibling... and the stepmum and partner throw it away. Was it about protecting the child—or shutting down the in-laws? Is the mother-in-law just trying to stay involved—or fully stirring the pot? 

They get into the messy middle of extended family politics, Christmas card awkwardness, and where photos live within the household.

If you’ve ever dealt with overstepping in-laws, silent partners, or hard decisions to do with your stepchildren —this one’s for you.

If you’ve got a dilemma of your own within a blended family, we’d love to hear from you.

Send it to us via Instagram @blended.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.